₦airaland Forum

In all honesty, I do not think I need to prove to you my personal contribution to the betterment of Nigeria, in my own small way. And certainly, I am not to blame for whatever you believe to be wrong with Nigeria.

Now, I believe you know that it is no crime to engage in a healthy conversation on whatever subject.

Anyway, your point is noted.

Now, do you have anything to say concerning the questions I raised, or did you only need someone to aim at, religious people in this case?

Personperson01:
You seem to explain your knowledge beautifully well. Your country Nigeria will be a better place if the same energy is used to understand and explain everyday happenings and even academic works. You religious people have a sickening bias with how you explain issues to yourselves. Scholars included.

Interesting.

But how did you know it was Ismail that Allah instructed Ibrahim to sacrifice? Why would Allah require a human sacrifice?

I understand the Christian teaching about God requiring a human sacrifice, since they consider it as a pointer to the coming Christ who will be offered as a sacrifice for the sins of the world, thereby supporting the teaching that someone can pay for the sins of another (but that someone will himself have to be without sins to qualify, if not, he will only be paying for himself).

However, it is against the core teaching of Islam for Allah to require a human sacrifice, because it will point to nothing, since no man can bear the burden of another.

Please OP, can you kindly explain why Allah required Ibrahim to sacrifice his son as a test, even though he had a plan to provide something to replace Ibrahim's son? What does it foreshadow?

Let us have a healthy conversation.

Much respect.

I want to learn, so please, let's hear you.

After you finish going through all the steps, then YOU CAN PACK YOUR THINGS AND GO TO YOUR FATHER'S HOUSE.

You ain't rebuilding sh!t.

And tomorrow one politician will be advocating for amnesty to be granted to these terrorists.

Continue. We will soon get there.

Ma mehn! You gat no chill bruv! Damn! You be surgeon ni? Which kind dissection be dis one wey you give this lady?🤣 🤣

kiddaz:
I smoke loud daily and I know 100% that I'm better and stronger than you, physically, financially, mentally, psychologically, spiritually, in character, charisma and judgement and in every single way walai. And looking at your profile picture shows you are the very weakling yourself. This your psychological projection will not help you. Accept the truth and work on yourself

In one word "PEACE"

If they give you peace, then wife or husband that person, because peace is what will sustain a home and creates the avenue for love and wealth to spring and flourish.

Not everyone can give you peace because we are wired to find peace in different ways, so the person that is able to create that peace for you is customized for you. Claim that person for yourself IMMEDIATELY, because if you loose that person you will be lucky to find a replacement.

Peace.

Kobojunkie:
I hope you do not already have any house help? If yes, please send the innocent soul back to his mother and father make we don't have to read a horror story next. 😒😒

I see what you did there.

Let me explain to the congregation:

What this person meant is that the wife may try to kill the househelp in her effort to tie every loosed end concerning her frolicking with the gateman, which the househelp may divulge when pressed. First angle.

Or, the person is imagining what the house help is going through in the hands of a woman that clearly has no boundary when it comes to exploiting people around her that she consider below her. Second angle.

Una understand?

This got me laughing like a fool in public. Why are you running?

kimjessey2019:
Last two years, I was in a restaurant and I saw the man that bought my first used car, I quickly rushed my food and ran out from the back door😂. 209 kompressor Mercedes nearly kpai me😂😂😂

I met her a virgin Sir, so we are kind of customized for each other.

So, yes, I do measure up to myself, the only one she knows.

🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

Thanks a lot.

Gotocourt:
Tuwo ko Gurasa 😅🤣😂

Move on with your life, step up your hustle.

🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

So you no gree submit to man of God. Don't worry, by the time you hear "If I be a man of gohrah!" your eyes go clear.

Thanks a lot.

The audacity of people in the name of religion needs to be studied.

Adaisback:
People dey try o. Una still get time with this spiritual father and mother nonsensse. My brother pls face your family and protect them with all you ve got. Na so one pastor wanted to play God in my life for demanding why I didn't come to church one Sunday like that , all my explanations that my brother's wife was having a difficult labor all through the night fell on deaf ears. He kept insisting that it was no excuse to not come to church. Na so I cancel the church sharp sharp and port back to my Catholic faith . What inconsiderate folks !

This one long, but I will list them:

1) She doesn't have a single female friend because she doesn't trust ladies (in her own words), hence she disliked any female I relate with, even my own relatives. But at the same time, she only makes friends with guys, most of whom are potential hit and run drivers. When I complained, she said it is her nature. Strike one!

2) She has never cooked for me (claiming she can only cook for her husband) but can come to my place and eat the food I cooked, indirectly showing me disrespect, telling me my place, and revealing her lack of consistency in reasoning. Strike two!

3) She once told me about a married woman who got impregnated by another man "by mistake" and her husband forgave her and even raised the child as his own. Then she asked me if I can do the same for her as a sign of my love? Na for dia I cut am serious warning! That one is strike 3,4,5,6,7,8,9 and 20 combined!

I opened the door for easy exit from the relationship and walked away soon after.

Great advice.

But that image though!

Did she later ride from Edoras to Minas Tirith? Or did she ride with King Theoden shouting "Death!" in the battle of the Pelenor Fields?

Sorry I had to ask.

She looks like one of the horsemasters in that dangerous position.

h777:
POISON THAT KILLS MEN

Once upon a time a beautiful girl got tired of her marriage life and wanted to murder her spouse.

One morning she ran to her mother and say to her " mother, I am tired of my husband I can no longer support his nonsense. I want to kill him but I am afraid Law of the land will hold me responsible, can you please help me mother?"

The mother answered:

- Yes my daughter I can help you, but, there is a little task attached.

The daughter asked "what task? I am willing and ready to assume any task attached in order to get him out"

OK, said the mother,

1..You will have to make peace with him, so that no one will suspect you when he is dead.

2.. You will have to beautify yourself in order to look young and attractive to him

3.. You have to take good care of him and be very nice and appreciative to him

4.. You have to be patient, loving and less jealous, have more listening ears, be more respectful and obedient

5. Spend your money for him and don’t get angry even when he rto give you money for whatever

6. Don’t raise your voice against but encourage Peace and love so that you will never be suspected when he must have died.

Can you do all of that?
Asked the mother.
Yes i can. She replied
OK, said the mother.

Take this powder and pour a bit in his every day meal, it will slowly kill him.

After 30 days the lady came back to her mother and said.

Mother, I have no intention of killing my husband again. As of now I have grown to love him because he has completely changed, he is now a very sweet husband than I ever imagined.

What can i do to stop the poison from killing him?

Please help me mother.

She pleaded in a sorrowful tone.

The mother answered;
Do not worry my daughter. What I gave you the other day was just Tumeric Powder. It will never kill him.

In reality, you were the poison that was slowly killing your husband with tension and dispassion.

It was when you started loving, honouring and cherishing him that you saw him change to a nice and sweet husband.

Men are not really wicked, but our way of relating with them determines their responses and feelings towards us.

Women if you can only show respect, dedication, love, care and commitment to your husband he will 100% be there for you.

Honestly, I don't even know.

I just knew, that's it.

And I am eternally grateful I chose her.

That woman drives me nuts, in a good way.

I didn't decide to marry her because of anything she did, but because of who she became to me after I found her - she became the lady I love simply because she exist, nothing more. All the standards I once had concerning who I wanted to marry simply became irrelevant.

She remains the dumbest decision I ever made (because I certainly did not bother to think too much about it), and also the best decision I ever made after accepting Christ (because I have no reason to regret the life we now share). I don't think any other woman could have endured what she endured with me while we went through financial hell.

Sometimes we just decide, but we can't explain why we did, but we just know that we should.

Crazy stuff!

Pootle:
so you mean by chance from puberty to 27years akamu no comot from your dickson, you fellowship people urna b liars my guy that year was a prayer cord screwing another sister cord

I didn't say I have never experienced ejaculation. Naturally, the body does its thing.

And yes, I have experienced self-abuse (to my shame) but I thank God for His mercy in Christ. I wasn't perfect and I never needed to be. But I was, and still am trying to follow the footsteps of Christ everyday. When I fall, I mourn it, but I always return to where I belong, not pretending but repenting and growing.

A true follower of Christ doesn't pretend about sin, we confess it. We don't boast about self-righteousness but about the righteousness of Christ our Lord.

So, yes, my wife is my first and she still remains the only one I have been physical with (sex wise).

Your believe or lack of is actually irrelevant to me.

However, I think you need to grow beyond that way of thought.

Pootle:
he and his school father fought because he did not marry the girl he was screwing in campus, school fellowship people fear them

May God have mercy on you.

I was a virgin when I got married, and I was 27 then. Stop projecting yourself on others.

If my ex was screwed, it certainly wasn't me.

But you are free to believe what you wish.

I don't have to prove anything to you.

Truth!

Thanks a lot.

2mch:
Thank you. Try to be at peace with all men except they pose a threat to the physical safety of your family. It doesnt mean you accomodate them or allow them into your space again. You can keep people at arms length with no beef.

I say this because this world is very small. You dont know where you will meet or need someone tomorrow. I am also very impressed with your parents. You are like this because they seem to respect you and your decisions as a man. Which is very rare for African parents who seek absolute control and submission. Case in point the decisions you made for the preacher in your marriage. Now you have grown to be very decisive and confident in your decisions.

Thank you so much Sir, I appreciate your advice and will follow it.

2mch:
You are a great husband with solid foundation and wisdom beyond your years. Kudos to your parents, they did a very good job raising you. If my daughter marry someone like you i will be very proud. You make very very good decisions and protect your family like you should. Some old men struggle with it making decisive decisions like you.

I will however advise you to give him a call and air your grievance in a respectful way. From Uni to present. Then slowly fade the relationship by calling and talking to him less. Dont visit again or take your family around there.

Sure stuff.

duduade:
You are good to go.. pray against any interference

My brother, me sef surprise as the thing long! Like play, I don turn parrot.🤣🤣 🤣 🤣

Proserpina:
Short read but you made it almost 10 paragraphs if he come be long read nko.

Lemme wait for summary or just read comments.

Thanks for this. I needed it. He is kind of trying to make my wife feel guilty about my behavior. I need to cut him off seriously.

laivwire:
You did not oh, my brother. Give him space, distance and time.

Evryone and i say again everubody should be put at bay when it comes to your home. No one hass the right or should denigrate your wife or children to your face, and you should not give them the chance to do so either.

You also do not owe him any explanation. Continue to avoid him, I'm certain he's gotten the memo as well.

🤔 deep stuff. You dey vex o!

Thanks for the hard Knocks.

NotOfThisWorld:
Did you go too far how? You've not gone far enough if he's still able to contact you and is trying to get you to visit him again. Cut him off totally and stop communicating with him. Recall he was upset and went "ballistic" on you when you broke up with your ex. Idk what was in it for him if you had married her. It seems he's still carrying that animosity for him to have made this comment about who you're now married to. For him to say that means he's not happy about your marriage, it might be some type of envy on his end, he's trying to plant the seed of fear in you, or he secretly doesn't mean well for you and your wife. In any case, this is definitely someone you should distance yourself from. You really should've cut him off when he told you he has more authority over you than your parents. Some of you are the ones giving these [demonic] pastors, spiritual leaders or whatever you call him audacity. Cut him off for good.

Funny 🤣 🤣 🤣 you.

DeltaBachelor:
Op you did well. Cut him off. Let me know when this hits FP

Gbam!

Thanks a lot.

poshestmina:
Exactly as you should, if he was so concerned about the Ex,he should have married her for himself.

Your family is your first responsibility...please don't put them in harms way.

Maintain the distant friendship (or whatever it was).Once in a while messages ,Birthday posts etc till time does it's thing.

All the best.

SixSeven:
You don't need any advice. What you are looking for is validation and I don't need to give you that. If as a man, you feel threatened by this so called friend, end it. That's your job. There's no need to confirm. I think the problem you have is the way you interpret things spiritually so you are confusing theocracy with human nature.

I agree.

However, I also stand that theocracy resulting in man controlling man is a product of human nature.

God rules. Yes, I submit to that.

But I refuse to allow man to control me in God's name.

Foodqueen:
You did well.

I wonder why all these so call spiritual father, mother, guardian.... always see themselves as assistant Jesus.

The thing taya me seriously.

I hope it will be a short read.

So, there is this person I met during my undergrad years who was into youth ministry in the campus. He is a family man. I was introduced to him by a family that I consider my spiritual parents, and being the passionate type about the Christian faith, I trusted him and we started doing Bible study and other campus outreach programs. Our friendship grew well enough that sometimes I visit his house during the weekend (along with other youths he relates with) for Bible studies and what not. With time, I got to trust him enough to allow him into my personal space, which is not something I do easily because I am an introvert (until I trust you, then I sanguinize rapidly).

Fast forward to about two years later, I entered my first relationship with a lady and I hoped to marry her, so I introduced her to him. Gbam! Things started changing between us. Whenever she and I had issues (mainly bordering around her closeness with guys and her dislike of other ladies, even my own relatives) he seemed to take her side, always blaming me for being rigid. Now, he might be right that I am rigid, because we clearly disagreed on certain issues like him claiming to have more authority over me than my own parents because he is my spiritual leader, which I firmly disagreed. Or him saying a good man will forgive a cheating wife, for which I replied "she will go to her father's house and NOBODY can make me take her back". And many other instances.

Now, as time went by I got fed up with her flirting with random guys, and her lack of commitment to the relationship, treating me like an option. So when I graduated and left her on campus, I decided to gradually end the relationship by telling her to simply go ahead and commit to any guy she feels an attraction to, since I will no longer be around. Any reasonable person would have understood what it meant. As God will have it, about two months later, I met the lady that will later become my wife. But I didn't even try to woo her until after about six months when I was on NYSC camp. So everything was done via phone. First, I called my ex and officially ended the relationship, then call the new lady and professed my love.

Despite almost a full year of separation, all hell broke loosed after that call. My ex reported me to that mutual friend, who immediately went ballistic on me. He threatened to take unpleasant measures against me if I don't retract my words and come to the table. Table? To eat what? Tuwo ko Gurasa? I maintained my stance, telling him, "When I return from camp I will come to see you, but don't expect any change in my decision, I will only come to officially tell about it". And that was what I did. And for about two years, we were estranged.

However, when it was time for me to marry, I thought it will be good for me to honour him for the five years we spent together as friends on campus, at least he was kind of a guardian in a way. So I personally travelled interstate to meet him and address any grievance, even offering him the honor of being the guest preacher on my wedding. Now, I had to bypass a host of ordained ministers who were colleagues of my Dad, to choose him. In fact, some of them even told my Dad that they hoped he would have chosen them to minister at his youngest son's wedding, but I made my choice, and my Dad respected it. Of course, he chose his own friend to do solemnization.
Everything went smoothly.

About two years later, my wife and I decided to visit his family for Easter, we went with our daughter who was barely a year old. We spent two days. After about a year we visited again, but this time we returned with a clear decision to end any close relationship with him, choosing to simply treat him as an acquaintance and no longer a family friend. But why the drastic measure?

Here it is:
During the second visit, in the course of our discussion, only the two of us, he admitted jokingly that on their way back from our wedding, where he preached, they were discussing about how I chose not to marry a lady that matches my educational level and age, but instead went to marry a small girl with lesser education because I want to control her. But I will be shocked with what I will get, because that small girl will surprise me (i.e. deal with me).
Literally laying a curse on the very wedding he preached on. That was it!

Ever since we returned, for more than three years now, I give him cold feet. He has tried many times to get us to visit but I always find a way to avoid it. I simply don't feel my family is safe around them. The trust is no longer there.

On more than two occasions, he called my wife telling her to ask me what his offense was, that I am ignoring him. For me, it is a matter of family security.

By the way, the age gap between my wife and I is 5 years only. But she has a small body, so people think she is a small girl. I love that woman too much to risk loosing my guard, not for anyone, much less someone who cursed us while we smiled at each other.

I am open to mature advise.

Did I really go too far by redefining our relationship with him?

Thanks bro, I can't argue against this. I clearly was emotional and all over the place. I just didn't know how to make it make sense to me because the timing of the whole thing just sucks.

I really need to get myself checked out, this stuff you wrote is scary. I got two kids below 6yrs, I don't want to take chances.

Onegai:
Ugochukwu was not hale and hearty

I'm sorry for your loss, but a lot of people are walking around really sick and not knowing.

Nigeria has very, very poor diagnostic medicine services, which is why everything is "malaria and typhoid".

BP 212/120
SPO² levels 89
A heart murmur
DVT
Fatty blood clot moving from your leg to your heart
A heart attack (even kids can have one)

Most of these things will give you little to no warning and the warning will come less than 24 hours after death.

By the time you're rushed to the hospital, there's nothing anyone can do.

It's not your village people, it's not because anyone is out to get you (be for real, why would I go to a babalawo, sacrifice my soul just to spoil your life instead of bettering my own life? How important are we in the general scheme of things sef?) it's just Life punching your checkout card and poor medical services.

Again, I'm sorry for your loss

drololaaof:
You said he had blood in his brain that means he had haerrhage( bleeding to the brain) that is severe, the cause of that you did not say or .know. what are his medical condition?
You are now blaming and cursing who may not have hand in his death . May the Lord forgive you of your ignorance

Am I ignorant of the medical jargons you used? Certainly.

However, a man was exiled to a "desert" to suffer, yet survived and thrived. The same man already completed his promotion training before visiting home for his annual leave to spend time with his aged mother. The same man already booked his return ticket and was supposed to depart the next day when he "suddenly" fell ill due to "malaria" then lost consciousness (not due to any accident oh), then got blood in his brain, and then died. All this happen in less than a week.

I may not be a medical doctor, but I am not ignorant of the spiritual angle to things. I do not doubt your medical expertise, buy I certainly doubt your exposure to the reality of life and the roots of things.

I would rather be ignorant of medical jargons but be realistic, than to be a medical "doctor" playing the ostrich concerning reality. That is the bigger ignorance you need "the Lord" to cure you of.

No Sir. We don't hate Igbo.

We have no reason to.

contentEngineer:
There's something fishy about this story , how can an Hausa man like an igbo man as a friend and even so heartbroken to mourn his death?


I thought hausas hate igbos (kafir)?

Starz825:
Take heart bro

Thanks bro.

Apho4real:
The hard truth I want people to know is -a person that will help you is not going to stress you at all.In a place of work , we often see some people doing high-service all in the name of promotion. At the end of the day, they get sacked .This shows that it is good to be yourself

You must have crossed the desert to know this truth, because only a man who survived a storm alone can speak like this. Surviving alone makes it easy for you to not stress yourself waiting for help, so help finds you.