₦airaland Forum

pocohantas:
It is not THEY, it is just the father.

The guy's siblings and mother were all present at the wedding.

The father can't win this one. He is a typical Lagos old money that asides having a street to their name, have lived their time.

At first I thought it was the whole family and thought to myself, she is s___d.

Wofai is not 38. At best she is 33. When did she graduate from UNICAL to be 38?

That is true then. He has lost it. Even the inheritance case looks shaky except he removes the wife and children from the Will, which would be heavily frowned upon.

SmallmebigGod:
The post was a response to another post talking of him loosing his "inheritance" . If he really have one why will be denied based on marriage. Of course being a son doesnt entitled him to any inheritance but if he has one portioned to him it can not be lost because of marriage

LOL! You would explain how much you contribute to the acquisition of those assets.

RealTrump:
Add this to the age gap, n the fact d boy doesn't look street smart, then u can understand why d family sense some manipulation.

I wouldn't date u if your family doesn't accept me let alone marry.

The amount of young feminist who would have listened to this girl's preaching about how u can do it all without a man, but 40 starts knocking, desperation enter.

Wofai Fada was a feminist in her heydays?

jedisco:
As the demographic decline continues, the next century will be dominated by a scramble for human resources same way the last few were dominated by a rush for natural resources. The west has found a way of doing this while convincing immigrant folks their worth lies in immigration. A good example has been India and China. Their GDP was close until 1995. China found a way to retain its best heads (even those educated abroad) and build wealth while India exported it's many good heads. Its the reason why I'm worried about Nigeria. We seem to be exporting our best heads (yes, I'm guilty) and sugarcoating achievements by Nigerians abroad means little to the home nation

A major reason is that the West is led by an Anglophone United States and both India and Nigeria are part of the Anglophone world. It would be hard to keep educated Nigerians at home or even attract those who have lived there for a long time to return to Nigeria. However, that happened under OBJ, Yar'Adua and GEJ's tenures - many Nigerians in the diaspora returned, took up jobs and started businesses. Then in 2015, they paired with other Nigerians to campaign and vote for Buhari because he promised to phight kwarruption. Another reason the Chinese returned is that it (China) is disproportionately Han Chinese - home of the Chinese people. The ties are priceless. People feel at home in a place where the government - Han Chinese - represents their interests. So, it is easy to convince them to return home unlike Nigerians.

jedisco:
Mostly this is due to the effect the western dominated media has on our psyche. A very good example is Chinese loans- in home and diasporean fora, it's interesting how Nigerian appear very worried when it comes up but very few bother about the details. Our Chinese loan of $4.8 B borrowerd at circa 3% has been responsible for most of our infrastructure over the last decade (rail, airport, powerplants e.t.c) while our Eurobond loans amounting to $15B, which is mainly looted back to the West and borrowed from mostly western agencies at rates of 8-12 % (yes 8-12%) are not talked about.

The West is doing it to persuade citizens in the developing world to loathe China and to an extent the Chinese. I don't want Africans to do the same. We stand a great chance in benefitting from China than the West. In fact, everyone everywhere does. It is because of Chinese business interests the Americans are now planning an Americas' Policy in Congress for the US to trade more with Latin American countries. Before now, why did they not trade with folks in their backyard? Why is it that when China comes to trade, the West believes it is also the best time to trade? Look at the purported railway in Angola backed by the US, it was solely because the Chinese were expanding the previous railway they did in the '70s in Tanzania. If the Chinese didn't move there, the US wouldn't. The same applies to Southeast Asia where American companies are announcing investments solely because Chinese businesses have invested significantly in the region. Expectedly, Southeast Asians view Chinese more positively than Americans.

People think it is by preaching kini kon hUmAn rItEs that would put food on someone's table or provide living standards. Or it is by forcing men to fvck their fellow men or confuse young children about which gender they belong to.

The annoying part is that while we took funds at those rates, European nations were borrowing at less than 1%. Yet, we hear nothing about this. Even this year we've took a loan of almost 2B at over 12 % to 'defend the naira' How can Nigeria take loans at rates of >6x that of Germany? Yet we don't hear western nations (or even local media) warning us about eurobonds. Even yesterday, someone brought it up at work and its always bemusing how the simple question 'why do you care?' reveals so much hypocrisy.

I have demystified the loan aspect here: https://www.nairaland.com/7801886/multipolarism-versus-hegemonism-great-power

We owe Western nations and institutions more than we do to Chinese organisations. That is an undeniable fact. People can see the result of Chinese loans: railways, airports and roads. The average Nigerian o, not one phonee speaking Nigerian with a fancy degree from a fancy university in the West tucked somewhere in VI, who in his/her past-time parrot American culture wars on TwitterNG while struggling under hot sun in the queue to purchase petrol.

SmallmebigGod:
Then the family should be ready for serious legal battle. I think they are being petty.
They want to decide for a 30 year old man, we have passed that age. And I don't think his inheritance is dependent on his marital status except his father's will stated that.

Legal battle for property wey no be him own? Except his money was involved in any of the family's assets, then he has a case. But if no money of his, he has no case. While it is normal and appropriate to bequeath your assets to your children, it is not mandatory. The patriarch can decide to do as he wants - he is the custodian.

MichaelSokoto:
say wetin happen?

because him choose who him wan marry?

Yes. It is a valid reason for them to do away with him. Parents remove certain children's names from the Family's Will for lesser reasons such as not approving their marriages.

superCleanworks:
seems nairaland is paying people to fabricate useless fables and keep people commenting.

if this story is actually true (which I doubt), then I suggest you marry that girl immediately.

I don talk this thing before but Seun denied it, but the kind of topics I read calls for its questioning.

Raalsalghul:
Sing it out loud.

Like I said before this should be the concern of most incoming Japaees rather than the "no available jobs" scenario.

The immigration policies are bloody o. Everywhere just dey somehow.

Life sef...

dominique:
They're aware of his intentions to marry the lady, they just weren't in support. Old money or new money, they need to realise that there's a level of control they can exert on an adult, a male for that matter. This action taken by them could make the son further distance himself away from them. Look at how things went with Psquare's family. Their rejection of the Lola led to estrangement between Peter and his siblings till date. The British Royal family is another example.

Well, he loses his inheritance. I hope he considered that too. Be like say the patriarch would comot his name from the Family's Will.

ednut1:
the baby mama rates in the Asian American communities ehn( Indian, Chinese, Japanese ) needs to be studied. So low

It is cultural. All cultures are not equal. Some cultures are more equal than others. Even in Nigeria, the same concept holds. A culture that condones wedlock would perform poorly than a culture that insists on children being raised by both parents.

Goodenoch:
It's not a criticism to say China is totalitarian. It's a matter of fact. There's a single party with decisions made centrally about all aspects of people's lives. Criticism is extremely frowned upon, to the point that if you were in China and you said the things you said about the West here about China's oppression of the Uyghurs; for instance, on Weibo, you'd very likely end up in jail if not worse. Despite all the negative things the West inflicted on Africa, I am sure that there's nowhere else in the World where an African today can migrate to and have as much opportunity to succeed academically, financially, career/business wise and even politically, as in the West.

For societies to prosper and develop, there are certain factors involved:

- Right to free enterprise
- Protection of private property
- Democracy or a semblance of it
- Ethnic/religious/racial dominance.

The last part works perfectly well for China as it is disproportionately Han Chinese. So, the term "totalitarian" sounds misplaced as the system works for them. In my books, so far there is economic prosperity, whatever political system a country desires to have as preferred by the majority is acceptable.

There are a lot of problematic aspects of living in the West, but most people would rather live there than in China because of the societal and economic liberalism it affords. That's also not an opinion but a matter of fact - migration trends show that clearly that Western countries are the most desirable locations for people to relocate to globally.

The point is ultimately not that the West is perfect or that it shouldn't be criticised - I don't think anyone has ever said that here. It's that the criticism ought to be fair, and that when comparing it to other countries, it shouldn't be a case of comparing the worst of the West with the best of China or whoever else.

I think we as black Africans even have a moral right to live in the West considering our histories. BTW, the West isn't doing us any favour as we are taxed for our labour and time. So, it is a mutual alliance. When the West is tired, they put up barriers as we have seen recently. The belief that the West is generous with allowing us access to its territory simply for humanitarian purposes does not follow. It is strictly economics, and we should acknowledge it. Nothing goes for nothing. We are dealing with people who propagated capitalism.

As for criticism of China, as a black African, I find it very odd. Why should people who have not built a functioning society criticise those who have done so? People who cannot ensure adequate distribution and stable electricity are advising those who build nuclear power facilities on how to generate electricity? It is like me advising Dangote on how to make and spend money. E no make sense to me. A Swiss criticises or lectures China? Fair deal. A Nigerian doing the same is appalling.

toughest007:
If you say it too loud, you'd be seen on here as anti-west, anti-nato, anti-US, and all the other related 'antis'.

The western custodians here would begin to question why and what you are doing here in the UK, grossly implying you shouldn't speak, reason and critic things objectively as a proper human should, just as you have nicely done!

I say it again and would say it a million times more, the western propaganda have really sunk real deep. It's a shame!

Well, in a way, I can understand how it is odd to criticise a country or alliance when one lives in that area. But as a black African, I don't see why I should steer away from the Chinese or join the Western criticism of China considering Africa has a lot to benefit from China than from the West. Also, history is important as the Chinese have NEVER colonised or brutally enslaved or slaughtered blacks in any form. In fact, the first encounter the Chinese government had with us was constructing a railway in East Africa with their rudimentary knowledge. Till date, the relationship has remained the same - trade - and practise your culture the way you want.

It was not the Chinese that butchered a mass number of Namibians or plundered and murdered Congolese or enslaved millions of Kenyans or raided Nigeria of resources while aiding and betting corrupt rulers, some of whom were installed to serve their interests. Isn't it surprising how no one in the West does not criticise Paul Biya of Cameroon but does the same for the folks in Niger and Burkina Faso?

In summary, no one likes the black man, most especially the black African man. So, it is important to focus squarely on what benefits us rather than do follow follow for wetin no concern us. If the West has a China problem, that is their business, not ours. Just because they have such does not mean we should have it. Africa does not and should not have a China problem. It is in our best interests to trade and do business with the Chinese according to the terms we agree with the Chinese. Anyone who does not like can move to Mars!

ednut1:
less than 30% of black men are responsible for the over 70% baby mama situation in the community. Men usually just want to nack but these women have an incentive to do it. Getting child support from 3 men is usually higher than getting child support from one man for 3 kids. Do the maths .

The western cultures also don't care about irresponsibilities as long as it not a crime 😅. DMX had 17 children and was broke at the time of his death. The thing dey confuse me too.

Tomorrow, they would get mad at Asian-Americans who excel in their various endeavours without addressing the root causes.

ednut1:
he has two children with the woman he didn’t do prenup with and 3 other children with other woman. As experienced as he is he is believing a woman’s assurance that has no legal backing when taken to court in event of a divorce. The joke is on you 🤣

But why do a lot of men, especially black men, in North America engage in such anomalies? It is an irresponsible way to live unless one is stupendously wealthy.

Having many children can lead to poverty.
Having many children from different women one is NOT married leads to dysfunction and multidimensional privation.

jedisco:
It took alot for them to purge themselves of this and regain some self consciousness. Today, China is about the largest trading partner of most nations. A driver in many fields, practically impossible to sanction and yet has began to improve prosperity by means of relatively fair relations and trade not by conquest and war. Many nations in Africa would have a much more practicable means of getting to the top by following the footsteps of China rather than by blindly following the West as frankly speaking we have no countries to steal wealth off and then claim democracy when we get to the top.

To add, the Chinese DON'T force their cultural norms on others. Yet to see or read where Chinese stipulate the presence of Chinese language schools or Confucian Institutes before a loan is lent. But for Ghana and Uganda, they must accept LGTV and how to change their genders to one of the numerous 5 billion genders in the world before money is borrowed.

jedisco:
It's said that if you take away the over 750million people China has lifted from poverty in a single generation, the world in general has made little progress in reducing poverty.
If China goes on to become the world dominant power, they stand the chance of being the first to achieve that with the lowest negative impact in human history. Their story has been an economic miracle. Thats what some folks comparing China to the US fail to understand- the miracle is that in 2024, China has become the elephant in the room.

Because the majority of the world's poor reside in sub-Sahara Africa and South Asia. I have no business with South Asia, but as a black African, I am concerned about the sub-continent - which any black African and I dare say, every black person, should be bothered about its economic development. Unlike other world powers who exploited and destroyed other countries to propel economically, China did not, which shows a model that works, aka tested and trusted. I admire them for that.

I get your sense of frustration but in doing that, I'd avoid insulting your folks as it depicts self hate.

This is the term people like me get smeared with, but why should a black person mock China when there are no comparable black-dominated countries that can stand head-to-head with Chinese-dominated enclaves? Why should a black person not admire, if the person is against copying, the strides the Chinese have achieved? Why do we have this belief that because a Westerner, aka white man, lampoons China, we go follow chook mouth? To say what? Feeling like intellectwats abi intelligentsia? With all that we claim we know, how many black dominated areas are functioning, safe, prosperous and developed like Singapore, Hong Kong and Taiwan? This excludes their cousins in Korea and Japan.

It pisses me off. If na to protest for people who have never acknowledged our own struggles, na we dey front. But to copy and take a leaf from a group of people who have withstood all odds to become a superpower, even just for the economics and aside the military, we no sabi. In fact, if I was in the West, a cheat code I would implement as a black man would be to send my children to the same schools Chinese pupils attend. I will do what they do because it works. Proven, tested and trusted.

zik4ever:
Thanks a lot and your input is valid. The only thing is that they don't lose teachers to competitors because the teachers actually volunteer and come on their own. Teachers retire or resign from jobs to join them and even at that, those who succeed in being employed there, see it as a divine call to serve. Also the school doesn't rely on prayers. They work and pray, burn the midnight oil and like I said, the teachers
joyfully pour their very lives into the children.

Nice to know. It is a school I can donate to with no strings attached. Kudos to the management. I will have them on my radar.

DonroxyII:
I Like You Already ... You Dey Hear Correct Gist Wellwell ....

Those Ones Being Spoilt by Alhaji & Gboys no go carry First Class Sha But Na all of Dem Go Get Job Before All These Public Schools Niggas

Just as womanisers don't become first class graduates. First class requires a lot of discipline and focus. But yeah, that is the outside world for you, they get pretty good jobs before even serious 2.1 students.

Nairalanders should be cautious o

essentialone:
wetyn you wan use the final CGPA do again?

To analyse her academic profile. She had a JAMB score of 324 and graduated with a first class in Chemistry. I am interested in her first JAMB score and her WASSCE grades. This is to understand where she is coming from and where she is going.

See more here: https://www.nairaland.com/7763389/top-jamb-scorers-where-today

aikyg:
Not a good route. People send their kids to Nigeria to study Medicine. If her parents or guardians can sponsor her in Medical School in Nigeria, it's still better for her. Going to America to study another course for three to four years before applying to go to Medical school is a total waste of time. She should just graduate in Nigeria and move to America as a Medical Doctor. All of us studied in Nigeria and graduated on time, even with the numerous ASUU strike. No stress!

Fair analysis. The parents better be well boxed up to finance writing USMLE.

samonak:
I guess you've have not heard of ELDS ( educationally less developed states) or catchment areas. I have seen where a guy with JAMB score of less than 180 was given Medicine and surgery admission at ABU - Zaria. Are u aware that a Candidate from say Anambra or Enugu has a cut off mark of 130 to gain admission into unity schools ( Federal government colleges) while a candidate from kebbi or katsina requires just 4 marks for the same thing? That's quota system for you.

ELDS constitutes less than 30% in admission requirements. Merit has it at 45%. Catchment area comes next. The number of Anambra folks who chose Medicine to study at UNIZIK outnumber those from other SE states and neighbouring states like Delta and Kogi. Also, based on catchment areas, someone from C/River or Rivers has a higher chance of being admitted to study Medicine at UNIZIK than someone from Yobe. So, someone from Yobe can't gain admission to study Medicine at UNIZIK. It is Medicine and Igbos are notorious for scoring very high. Juilet is the one who has a greater chance of being admitted to study Medicine at ABU than the fellow from Yobe. As for Unity schools, catchment area does not apply.

As for the fellow who gained admission to ABU to study Medicine is their problem, but I am quite surprised at such folly and anomaly.

aikyg:
Do you know how much i costs to study Medicine abroad? Medical school in Nigeria is highly subsidised and also one of the best. That's why it's difficult to gain admission to study medicine in Nigeria. Our leaders know they cannot import doctors from other countries the way they import engineers. That's why they spend more on medicine than they do on a course like Engineering.

She has a first class in Chemistry. What she would have done is to write SAT, and score very high then apply to universities in the US that would admit her to study a life science course (scholarships are plentiful). Upon graduation, she can proceed to study to become a medical doctor. Taking a loan to study medicine in the US is a better option than studying it in Nigeria (ASUU + internal issues). If she now decides to later relocate to the US after her studies at UNIZIK, that makes her current decision even more foolish because she would spend a WHOLE LOT and have wasted years she would have used in acclimatising in the US.

CSTRR:
Biomedical engineering in America should have been the next step for her,.if she likes medical sciences so much.

She wasted that grade mehn.
I'm pained.

Ignorant advisors. With that brain, she should have written SAT rather than JAMB and get into a good school in the US. Show them you graduated with a first class in Chemistry. They admit you to study Biology, ace it and go on to become a medical doctor with further studies in the only country where skilled black professionals earn more than anywhere else. First class in Chemistry is not common, unlike numerical sciences.

Is she really Igbo sef?

samonak:
Competition wey person from Yobe with UTME score of 160 will be given medicine and surgery on merit list while someone with 300 from Anambra or IMO would not. Is that "competition" ?

No one from Yobe with a score of 160 would gain admission into UNIZIK. Even at that, I strongly doubt such a person would gain admission to study Medicine in any Northern university. She is not competing with people from Yobe to get into UNIZIK, except she wants to study in a Northern university, which not many Igbo females do compared to their male counterparts.

ADecadeAddict:
Biochemistry is basic science? Lol.

What else is it? Advanced science?

Enemyofpeace:
as if education there is free of charge

Scholarship. She could have even written SAT to study Biology there and later changed to Medicine. She has ignorant advisers.

A PhD in biomedical sciences or medicinal chemistry could have been okay. Also, she could have done the JAMB writing when she was either a first year or second or even third year Chemistry student at UNIZIK. Her choice nevertheless.

BTW, what was her final CGPA as a first graduate?

MrBrownJay1:
- you guys had a deal...he did his part and you did yours. why you now suddenly want to scatter his marriage?
- how you want to look for a BF to take you seriously when you've allowed a married man to use you like a useless 2nd hand car?
- when he was heating on his wife with you and taking care of you, you had no problems, but now you wanna call his wife? do you even know how stupid you sound? this wife will tell you to fukc off (and she will be right because you are only mad because he finally got rid of you)

many of you low life deluded women (who are side hookups but want to act as if you were the wife) allow some yeye h0rny deceitful man to use and abuse you because of Iphone 13 and upkeep, and think you are clever, while its the rich married ignoramus that is winning, not you. if you were ever worthy in his eyes, he would have done you right (aka divorce his wife and make a lifetime commitment towards you by MARRYING YOU

She is clearly not the bright type. The bright ones satisfy the man, earn a good income and while at it, get married to an ignorant young man AND keep the sugar daddy in the loop for side income and sex. The ones who don't get married early enough ensure the sugar daddy takes total care of their needs and sponsors their siblings in either education or business and if they wish to relocate, the sugar daddy funds the entire process. Those who decide not to relocate get dem daddies to purchase properties, cars and other investments in their own names. The ones who don't want to get married now retire as feminazis on TwitterNG where they abuse younger men who are working on themselves while recruiting younger girls on the side and pimping to wealthier men.

The OP is clearly not the bright type. As for telling his wife, that is even more foolish as no sane black African woman married to a wealthy man will let go of him simply because he cheated. In fact, she expects him to have fun with younger girls as she most likely instituted a sex timetable for the wealthy man, while she focuses on spending his money and taking care of the children.

DonroxyII:
You Get the Point 👉 now, That is Just it ....

Life is all about Mental Preparation for what it is & What it isn't... It's beyond what you are thought in your secluded Private World where you are Protected from "The-Worlds" ....

But Once You Enter The World where You Get to See The Karishikas becoming the Boss Favourite while the First class is Pushed to The Back Room, That's when The SU stylishly get inducted into "The-Worlds" too .... Otilor Niyen 😉 ....Street is Too Immoral & Dirty But Gen Z are all well Exposed Sha including the Best students among them ... Nothing is gonna be New ...

After School na Party-Club ...

I read a lot about Babcock and Covenant universities. ABUAD to an extent. No idea about private universities in the East. For Baze University, a Nairalander mentioned how our politicians are spoiling the girls there with cars worth 40 million and later diversified to AUN in Yola.

DonroxyII:
Prayers & Academic Seriousness is Bound to Produce excellent result but their problem will come when they enter the street ... Except They Mostly Go back to Academic .... nevertheless, God has a way of Protecting & Defending "Its People" ...

The Street is where the "Karishikas Baddies" Trives more than the Academic Guru .... !

That's the problem when one isn't balanced sha. The outside world can be very corrupt and isn't the secluded academic world they experienced. I recalled a tweet where a CU alumna was lamenting how Lagos and the corporate world can test one's faith. I'm sure she has witnessed things she never thought were real while she was a student. That's the reality many academically brilliant students from church managed schools who attended private universities will experience. Those who attended public universities have been exposed to such a life, and are mentally prepared for such a world.

Good luck to those involved.

zik4ever:
The school is a great school and has been doing well in Cowbell competition etc but I think they have not gotten commensurate publicity. It's a private Christian school, operated by Peace House, a ministry led by Bro Gbile Akanni. They have opened a second campus in Abeokuta. The main campus is in Gboko, Benue State. As far as I know, the staff are not paid salaries but live by faith! They also don't have official school fees but parents/guardians pay as able and led, which is discussed and agreed with the school. They have high moral standards, mission focused and zero tolerance for immorality, indiscipline and exam malpractice. The teachers are passionate and pour their lives into the students as they are not primarily motivated by salary. They see their jobs as divine mandate to raise the children.

Thank you for your explanation. Unfortunately, quality education needs money, not just prayers. Loyola Jesuit and Covenant University are good examples. Either they seek funding from wealthy Christians or they institute an acceptable tuition fee, else they are at the risk of losing their talented teachers to competitors.

As expected, they aren't getting publicity because they aren't winning in any category in the Cowbell Mathematics Competition.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cowbellpedia

P.S. The winners in the Cowbell competition are disproportionately schools managed by churches. Man! Even an atheist has to accept the fact that Christianity is a force for good.