₦airaland Forum

He wants married men's opinions not Ndi red pillers, yet he's not married, planning to marry or have done small thing on the lady's head. Fake story! Never existed.

Lots of mentally derailed people with access to the Internet. Na Obasanjo cause all this thing sef!

Lorayne:
This is wrong. There re a lot of single northern women... A whole lot.

Except if you re talking about hausa women which I also know a few who are single.

I am curious, are these women Christians or Muslims?

Talismann:
Akwa ibom girls and igbo guys form a very good combo. I've seen the match work countless times

Akwa ibom girls sabi love, they cook very well, take care of home, very clean and excellent in za oza room too.

Igbo guys love to impress their woman by spending, and when the woman earns it in this case, oh they spoil her rotten with love, affection and gifts. And the woman in turn gives her all. And the cycle continues. The combo works almost all the time. Tested and trusted

Perfect explanation.

Some Akwa Ibom men do complain, but generally, the combo works so good. It is one of those inter-ethnic marriages in the south that works so well due to geographical propinquity, same religion, cultural similarity, etc.

XerXers:
These 4 SE A-List cities are experiencing unprecedented growth. I have been telling people that Aba GDP per Capita is highest in Nigeria apart from Abuja and Lagos but they argued, especially PH people with their "oyel" mentality . This stat proves me right

Do you actually know the meaning of GDP per capita? And how come Aba is the highest, but not Onitsha, Kano or Kaduna?

motionarena:
Mugu is he ugly?

When she jam real ugly she go change mouth

Are you talking to me, sir?

---

Nairaland now has a character limit ni?

If I'm not mistaken, Gen-Zs mean girls below 25? Then, it's appropriate except the 35+ man has a lot of money. It's why I laugh when many men on social media chant that they want ladies between 22-25 when they don't have enough money to provide more than an average environment for these girls. The chasm in reasoning between a 25 year old lady and a 35 year old man is too wide. Unlike previous generations, these are people who grew up with the Internet. So, they don't see things the way you, a 35 year old, does. So to fully enjoy their youthfulness and sweet bodies, you must come correct, financially wise.

las las, many 35+ year old men, especially as many are average, will marry their age mates, again, especially as they want their would-be wives to contribute to the household. Please don't expect a 22 year old girl to be an equal or substantial provider. Things don't work out that way.

GboyegaD:
Great story to learn from unfortunately, many of the responders above either did not read the story or lack comprehension skills.

Everyone knows his/her struggles. If you have to go low before you go high, so be it.

Because the person in question is a certified criminal, as attested by the BBC interview.

Thundafireseun:
The same useless father that was calling me that his daughter is hungry…
Blatantly refused…
The useless father said over his dead body will I marry his daughter….

Stop having children with a woman whose family members don't like you.

Chief2410:
better to be stingy than to be used. You that is not stingy, how many random men have you gifted money?

You mean the same women who shout with a response like "I no fit give man money o".

I don't believe it's a man's world, but rather a woman's world. It is why every man should strive to make his money and spend it MAJORLY and FIRST on himself before anyone else.

ruthieo:
Gbam
There is this joy a woman derives when her man gives her money

Yet all men get on social media are consistent attacks on their personality in the name of "men are sc.um" and "men are this and that". One begins to wonder if these women won't have anything to do with men or if they don't/won't have male children. Anyway, in the future, if the constant attacks continue, they will affect how their daughters view their sons.

Thundafireseun:
2020 when I had my daughter….

I was sending my baby mama 15k every month….
5k for pampers 5k for medicine
5k for Miscellaneous expenses….. don’t forget Nigeria was still very ok
Her father called me that why am I not sending money for feeding to his daughter?
A graduate that was inside his own house…. Under his own roof 😩

You should have married her. Baby mama is more expensive than marriage. I don't know why many don't know this.

odinson1:
Oga the men are the root cause. When you have foolish yahoo boys and rich igbo men splashing money on different girls, why won't girls become entitled and expect everyman to just be giving them money for existing?

Like we had a FINTECH CEO in Ibadan dashing a random girl he saw on Twitter 500K naira. How much is the entry level salary in big banks again? Our men caused this thing, and the women have become so entitled to it.

With the complaints I have read here, I am not alone with the "how are you?" I don't even wish any happy birthday. Sometimes, I am even afraid to click "like" on a birthday picture. No wonder hookup is rife - straight to the point, over and out.

ediko5:
I'm always excited when I hear women say that men nowadays are like princesses. It means a lot of men are no longer being used by them.

Gone are those days a lady will tell a man to go and make money before he can date her and the man after making money will return to the same lady for a relationship.

Chivalry is dead, and women killed it.

uchman:
Please when applying for Japan student visa at the Japanese Embassy.
Which documents are my supposed to present as a sponsor?
How can I get this underlined document?

You don't need to provide any document unless stated by the embassy. It is the school that would request such, not the embassy. The embassy requires your Certificate of Eligibility (COE). Except Nigerians don use POF begin dey deceive Japanese universities. 🙄

blackbriar:
Well done so far.

For the School Bit
1. What kind of research do you want to do?
2. Why do you want to do this research?
3. What are your future aspirations; phd and potential scholarship funding?
4. My advice, make a presentation slide about your self with more of illustrations, slides, diagrams and pictures to help the Professor understand you better.

Slide 1. Introduction
Add a picture of yourself.
Contents should be name, educational background and work experience.
Keep it simple methodology (KISS).

Slide 2. Your Research intention
Keep it simple methodology (KISS).
Why, your aim and so on. Use more of diagrams and illustrations

Slide 3. Your Future intention and research
Keep it simple methodology (KISS).
Phd?
Work in Japan?


For the Work Bit

Personally, I would have loved for you to pursue this stream especially with your IT background.

Note. Employment in Japan is periodical. Japan companies mostly and greatly employ before April of each year. Not to worry though. Mid -level recruitment all year round but March and September are mostly the recruitment periods.

What to do. Improve your Linkedin Profile.
Set job search to Japan so that recruiters can see your profile. Also look for IT recruiters in Japan on LinkedIn recruiting for IT roles and send introductory messages.

Create accounts on Japan job seeking sites such as
1. https://www.daijob.com/en/.
2. https://global.rakuten.com/corp/careers/
3. https://doda.jp/
4. https://www.rgf-professional.jp/en/for-candidates/for-candidates-b
5. Michael Paige Japan
6. Robert Walters Japan
If Indian’s can get the jobs from India, you can also do it.

My humble 2 cents and Gambatte

You don finish work!

Mr Rictech,

What you have up there is gold! It is extremely thorough.n Follow through and good luck with it. And yes, if possible, which I highly recommend, focus on job hunting and try to get an offer.

Blame Buhari who initiated the crude for loan scheme. Blame Buhari who squandered the Excess Crude Account with the likes of Oshiomole, Amaechi and Fashola who harassed Jonathan and Okonjo-Iweala (Peter Obi was the only governor who opposed the extravagance) for saving money. Blame Buhari who backed massive insecurity across the country.

Most of you, including the OP, campaigned and voted for Buhari in 2015. Why are you lots complaining?

Commentor:
So, 1 man patronising is the cause?

Why do onlyfans girls make only 200 dollars per month if all men were patronising them?

Men are the patrons of the OF girls who earn 200 dollars per month. No male demand? No $200. It is that simple. This is basic economics.

Commentor:
The women are lazy.

Average Earnings from OnlyFans is $150-180/month.

Men continue to get blamed for the madness exhibited by women.

Here: https://x.com/TrendingEx/status/1932096305058242561

A FINTECH CEO sent a young girl 500K to "appreciate" her beauty. Whose fault is this?

Men are the cause.

odinson1:
Uncle use common sense na

It is the optics of the thing. If a young woman is single and lives alone, there's a good chance that she'd be more prone to engaging in certain... activities. Now is that the case for all single women who live alone? No. But again, it's the optics. If a woman is single and lives alone, she has the freedom to be a hoe and engage in hoe activities however she likes. But does that always mean she's going to be a hoe? No.

And as for the expensive phones, It's the optics once more. The issue is that if she doesn't have a job and she's using a very expensive phone, most people are gonna to assume a guy bought it for her. Could be a sugar daddy or it could just be from hook-up work. OR, it could be her father or brother.
Again, it's the optics.

Based on your comments and the OP's explanation, it boils down to hasty generalisation. Men should ask questions before assuming. People should not apply their circles' behaviours towards others. This is why it is important for people to marry within their social classes. It solves many issues.

P.S. OP did not factor in if she has a good job or a job at all. He just stated that single women should not live alone. That is balder.dash!

The White man has his fault regarding his history with Black people. But so far, Black people are better off in the long run under the influence of the White man, especially the Anglophones.

The Italian man who stabbed a Nigerian in Italy to death for wooing his woman got a jail sentence of 20 years. I'm curious to see if the prepatrator of this act will be arrested, charged to court and sentenced for murdering someone because of N1500.

We just aren't it at all.

Her soul rest in peace.

blesdman:
Continue. Time will validate or invalidate ur opinion

A lady graduated from Unijos and got a job in a law firm in Lagos. She knows no one there. Where should she stay? Or should she let go of the job offer?

A lady runs a thriving business. As a way to reward/spoil herself, she gets the latest iPhone. Is that a bad thing to do as a spinster?

I'm genuinely curious to read your response.

Esthered:
Don't use your neighbor to generalize everyone.

I'm currently doing a training with a bank and most of my female colleagues are single, responsible and well to do in their own way and live alone. Guess what, some are in serious relationships.

Someone relocated from ABJ to LOS where she has no family for a better offer, you'll tell her to leave the offer because she'll have to rent and live alone and will never find a man. Babes we get cars and are independent.....I laugh in Spanish.

Funny enough my sister is in a serious relationship wey the family sabi the guy and he helped her select the apartment while she paid herself.

You guys talk as if you don't have sisters with career aspirations and big dreams that if staying alone will help them SCALE, why not?

Abi una sisters no japa to UK or Canada alone? You'll tell her to stay back because she needs to keep th3 image of a responsible lady to land a man at the expense of her growth and self-development.

Sometimes, I understand why many ladies stay off Nairaland and the feminist ideology of many educated Nigerian women. Staying alone shows independence as an adult, and we've men scream daily for their wives-to-be to be independent, aka don't be liabilities. Then all of a sudden, the women shouldn't use expensive phones and live alone even if they have no one in the state/city they work.

The thing with social media be say it has people from all walks of life who comment based on their outlook, which most times, are extremely limited in the grand scheme of things. One up there, a Keke driver (no offense to them) is wooing a lady based on what he has seen about her in the spirit realm. He doesn't even know if the lady is economically better than him.

I'm disappointed in OP considering his history on NL. So ladies who graduated from schools outside Lagos should do what to live in Lagos? Using an expensive phone has nothing to do with being marriagable provided she can afford it or her family member gifted (dashed) her. So like this now, if I gift my sister an expensive phone, she becomes unmarriagable? The first high end phone she got was even a gift from her school.

What should ladies who got jobs in Lagos do, Nna? Live in Anambra and travel to Lagos every day for work? Some points are understandable (some modern men would be okay with tattoos to an extent), but using an expensive phone, answering many calls and living alone aren't reasonable at all.

Three pages and not a single "F" comment. It's not every thread one should have an opinion, especially when you're not the target audience.

The blame lies on the moderator who pushed the thread to the front page without the OP's strategy. Also, the OP is to be blamed. When you state that you have a method to explain, you do so at once even if it means creating this thread at a much later date.

TheFreshVanilla:
Won't mock him. Although, na mumu dey grant press. If she manages to bring him over, that’s still better than remaining in poverty like many of his peers back in Nigeria who think making 500k a month is a sign of good living. If you’re 35 with no asset, no steady income, no kids, still blaming government and no savings despite being educated, it’s time to rethink your choices and drop some of those silly beliefs that keep holding you back. Even if the relationship doesn’t work out, I believe the guy will be smart enough to come away with something valuable. It’s still progress, and someday he can tell his grandkids about the sacrifices he made for them. Don’t go blaming God for your failures. Maybe it’s just that you haven’t adopted the mindset that helps people succeed especially when things get tough.

I really like your comment as it's thought provoking. Thank you.

Meanwhile, at the bold, do you mean that 500K as an entry level salary in any part of Nigeria (excluding the island part of Lagos) isn't good enough for a young graduate?

The blame lies on the men who subscribe to her profile, just as other men who patronise sex workers then complain of their increasing numbers. There are ladies who started OF but had to shut it down because they had very few subscribers.

Selling sex like any business or service is basic economics - demand and supply. Supply does not exist without demand.

jaxxy:
uriel was one of the hottest girls to grace BBNAIJA but when a girl doesn't listen and make good choices in her prime it typically becomes harder for her and this applies to everyone.

How some people don't decline after their prime they keep getting better till they peak because of good choices and advice.

To be fair, she worked on her body (naturally) and built her finances. The problem is that she cannot get pregnant but wants a man who isn't interested in having children, yet isn't open to polygamy. Things don't work that way. She has to lose some as she cannot always win.

Interesting thread with interesting responses.

The institution of marriage go dey interesting to observe in a decade's time. Na the offspring of these marriages I dey pity - accumulated depression and transferred aggression.

I won't be surprised parents would screen their children's potential partners' parents way more than the partners their children intend to marry.

kingbee90:
It is APC, Buhari and Tinubu's fault.
The number of unmarried single men increased from 2016 till date.
The APC government made Nigerian youths broke.

Thank you!

To add, the insecurity and wanton destruction of communities, especially in the north-central, has been exacerbated under Buhari and continues to date. Entire communities were razed and their men butchered. I recall a Nairalander who stated that he met many young ladies in Nasarawa who had children without husbands because their husbands were slaughtered by Fulani herdsmen. So there is this large number of single mothers whose husbands have been brutally murdered, a growing number of young single women who want husbands and a growing number of young men whose economic growth has been truncated. Mind you, during this same period of Buhari, the rate of hookup swelled as I have been following Nairaland for 10 years, but did not notice the discourse or topic as of 2010 - 2015. Economic servitude pushed many into it. Add social media and a liberal sexual media, it has turned into an industry.

Many Nigerians are ignorant and arrogant about the calamity the incompetent cattle rearer brought upon the country. A man whose antecedents date back to 1984, yet so-called educated people campaigned and voted for him in 2015 because he promised to phight kwarruption.

Adanambra1:
most men can not control their sexual urge, yet you want to marry a virgin
if we have 1000 men in a comunity and 90 of such men have slept with atleast 2 ladies aged 13 to 30 in the same society. Nairaland, please i ask you all how many Virgin will be left.
please can men start taking resposiblity of this beast, you all have created. can social media start campaign against men who use money bait just to hook wink and sleep with ladies... as you are luring those girls with urgent 10k and getting sex... someone another predatory man is doing same to your sisters. girly aura disappears
your girls wearing good wig, but already spent... crazy mileages thanks to you all men, for the mileage and baggage the Beast you don't tame today. will come after you tomorrow

Many Nigerian men, especially those in the south, find it hard to accept the reality that the ideology behind "we are polygamous by nature" fuels the hookup trade, and as such, it would be difficult to have virgins. We cannot have men who pursue teens complain in five years time that there are no virgins. As long as men hunt for women to have sexual pleasure without marrying them, there will be an equal number of women who aren't virgins. These women don't sleep with themselves.

I don talk tire:
- https://www.nairaland.com/7684230/how-reduce-hook-ups-nigeria
- https://www.nairaland.com/8064135/hook-up-girls-earnings-expenses-pictured

If we are to believe the survey results (you did not cite the study), it also means there is an equal number of ladies who are unmarried.

- One, in today's world, many people wouldn't get married. This is not necessarily a Nigerian thing, but a global issue and for varying reasons.
- Two, the major cause for ours is the state of the economy. As of June 2025, the economy has not hit a 5% GDP growth rate. The last time we had a GDP growth rate above 5% was with Jonathan's administration. The population has ballooned to more than 200m (I find this figure debatable anyway), but there are fewer economic opportunities. Unlike the '90s, when tertiary education was not widespread, many would not marry today because of what they know.
- Three, women now earn their money, so modern day women have added more requirements for the kind of men they want beyond "he can provide". Yes, women have maintained their hypergamy, but this time, they want more from their would-be husbands because they, too, earn their money. So, a significant proportion wouldn't mind remaining single forever, going the route of surrogacy (we recently had a "freeze your eggs" debate) or even marrying other women. Again, this was not widespread 30 years ago. Things have changed.
- Fewer economic opportunities for men as more women have joined the workforce. Women have maintained their hypergamy even though they have grabbed 50% of the economic opportunities which would have gone to men. I don't think society should have a situation where many men don't have access to plenty of economic opportunities.
- Lastly, there is the alpha male and ndi ifeminisim ideologies, but I don't think these are major causes.

More light was shed on here: https://www.nairaland.com/8444669/time-settle-down

jedisco:
Hehe. These your policies would sure kick out any govt overnight.. There is a reason why PM after PM eventually turns to more migration.
Take the winter feul payments - older folks around me kept complaining about it at every opportunity. One said 'this government wants to kill off the old folks'. Same person has a second house in Spain which he and wife visit for some months every year. Another while complaining is also looking to sell of his house valued at over 500k, then get a quaint bungalow and use the remnant to buy a second house in France.

You can handle your pension if its a SIPP. Regarding state pension, there is no seperate money stored anywhere for it. Na classic ponzi - needs more people coming thru to pay. Finally, na person wey get money dey think abt management.
75? Dude, I'm not prepared to work to 75. Me that is already thinking of which Caribbean beach to routinely visit while sipping pina colada in my 50s

Well, young people of today in developed countries should brace their minds not to receive a pension when they are in retirement.

As societies prosper, birth rates decline. First high birth,high death, then high birth, low death then low birth, low death rate. That is where most are and frankly we don’t know what's next. People make the mistake of apportioning low birth rates to high cost of living forgetting the poorest parts of the world have significantly more kids. Even looking into most nations e.g Nigeria, same is the case.

Largely in the south. The birth rate in the north is way higher.
https ://www. economist. com/middle-east-and-africa/2024/11/07/why-the-fertility-gap-between-north-and-south-nigeria-matters

It is not any high cost of living. People these days want to get everything at once - enjoy their lives, travel here and there, eat here and there, buy this and that, target this promotion and that, achieve this milestone and that, alongside bearing children. I am an advocate of fewer children since I am a Nigerian, but for the developed world, they have to choose a struggle. They cannot enjoy those material aspects of life and still expect an increase in the birth rate.

Anyway, I don't see birth rates increasing as the birth control and education, which later translates to money, are firmly in the hands of modern day women. They have tasted economic and reproductive freedom, they wouldn't let go of them. So, the government should heavily tax those who refuse to marry and born pikins.