₦airaland Forum

Olami90:
Hmmmmmmmm..................................

I see that ur brother is cute
Oun ani la n naani


Wish them success in their marriage.
D wife is way cute sha.

Obviously ladies love money than their lives. They can marry even cow as far as money is involved.

vikturaikay:
To the glory of God, come Jan 12th 2017. My brother will be finally hooked for life. Save the date.

StupidYorubaFool:
She's just 24 and a sophomore in school. She goes to school from her parent's home and the distance from her dad's home to school campus isn't far.
Recently she just told me she wants to egress from her parent's home cos at her age she's qualified to be independent and living alone is so vital as she will restrategize herself and build up her potentials.

I don't really agree to this as I think she may use that liberty to flirt with guys and sleep around.
I'm so bothered and apprehensive cos I learnt lessons from my elder sister whose fiancee got her an apartment but paid her an impromptu visit without my sister's knowledge and to his utter dismay came and found a guy who spent the night with my sis in the apartment and he was shocked, saddened and heartbroken and quickly ended the relationship.
So I think if I assist my girlfriend financially to get her an apartment with my own money.
I may be surprised to find out she could invite a guy to the apartment. I wouldn't trust a girl to that extent all because of love

Guys what ya advice?

Cc Goingape1 chrisrare ifakiland Benita27 et al

Ralphjoe:
I got to meet a girl through facebook, we talked and finally hooked up, i asked her out and she accepted, she told me about her two boyfriends that left her for greener pasture, one left for italy and the other one went to ghana, she never broke up with any of them.

So we started dating as we both are student in the same school and department. The whole relationship grew into deep love and affection between us, but she still talk on phone with her previous boyfriends, even when we are together, she will be engaged in a long conversation on phone with her previous boyfriend and also on whatsapp, it got to a stage that i saw a message she sent to her previous boyfriend in ghana that she love him so much, i got so angry with her and she begged me, & she confess that she still love him but she loves me the most and she would love to marry me, we settled the issue.

And now the boyfriend in ghana paid her a surprise visit yesterday when i was at her place and was about leaving, with this now, should i still continue dating her or not? bearing in mind that she is so supportive of me in school.

sarahade:
Psychological fornication. wetin be that sir

ChemicalReaction:
This is religion section not health ok??
he also used 'sin' and to me 'religion' and 'sin' go hand-in-hand with 'MORALITY'
I stand to be corrected.

Afam4eva:
You have just shut yourself in the foot with this statement. What you're implying if my English serves me right, is that. Masturbation itself is not a sin but leads to sin. Why don't you leave what it leads to and answer the question. Is Masturbation a sin? na so una dey fail waec. Dem go ask simple question, una go dey find extra sheet

Afam4eva:
The word is not actually lust. I just used it in lieu of "thinking of someone in a sexual way". And yes you can thin of your wife in a sexual way.

Pastor Chris also said that masturbation is a dirty habit but not all bad habits are a sin. And i agree.

Afam4eva:
I think will like to align with Pastor Chris here.

i think Masturbation is a bad habit...

But i don't thin it's a sin.

I was arguing this thing with a pastor and he said that every act of masturbat.ion involves the subject imagining lustfully after someone.

And i asked him: What if i'm lusting after my wife when masturbating?

redon12:
Tis been a wild practice for me ..
though ashamed of it ...
But

you guys got to answer me cause am really getting confused here...

Pls IS MASTURBATION A SIN??.

EduRegard:
Crushing over someone is like loving the impossible or imagining for something almost impossible to be possible. Crushing is like an emotional prison where you are arrested by love. Some people Infatuate but misconstrue it as crush. Either of the two, I'll give you some steps to get over with your crush.

These steps, though they are for the girls, guys can also use them for their own good.

1. Realization:

The hardest part about getting over your crush is realizing that he doesn't like you the same way that you like him. The realization might be the first step, but it's the hardest step to take.
While you may like the guy, while you may even love him, if he doesn't feel the same, you can't force it – no matter how much you try to.

2. Admit you have a crush:

Once you've come to the realization that he might not have the same feelings you have for him, you've got to admit that you have a crush.
I know it can be hard girls, but even if you just stand in front of your mirror and admit to yourself that you have a crush.
State your feelings out loud. You don't have to tell anyone else how you feel, but verbalizing your problem out loud — even if you're the only person in the room — can help it seem real and approachable.

3. Accept the situation:

You've admitted that you have a crush and even though it's far from the ideal situation, try to make steps towards accepting the situation. Try not to be stubborn about it or be in denial of what's really going on. Perhaps the two of you aren't as compatible as you first thought. You might even find later on that it was a good thing that your crush never turned into more. This is not failure. There are times, though, when perseverance morphs into desperation and stupidity. Chasing an impossible crush is one of those times. Let it go.

4. Don't take it personal:

Just because he doesn't have feelings for you, it is not something that you can take personal. Learning to get over your crush might not be easy, but it isn't a personal indictment.
A guy can't control his feelings just like you can't control your feelings. Imagine if a guy likes you, but you have absolutely no feelings for him – don't take it personally.

5. Avoid anger

Taking personal and being angry are somewhat similar but differ. Don't turn your crush into anger - you'll still be thinking about him and obsessing about him, just in a different way. It may feel good to bash him to your friends and to tear him apart for everything he's ever done wrong, but in the end it's not a great solution. Some people just aren't meant to be together and getting angry about it isn't going to change anything.

6. Do a reflection

When you are trying to get over your crush, why not take the time to reflect? Did you act differently around him? Did you scare him off? Was there something that you did? You want to reflect on everything and all of the interaction that you've had – just for a little while, don't dwell because you don't want to dwell on something that will never happen for days and days, but just reflect.

7. Be honest with yourself:

Getting over your crush is never easy, but you have to be honest with yourself. You've got to be upfront with yourself about your feelings and how you are affected by your crush not returning to them. Once you are honest with yourself about how hurt you are, it's easier to process and simpler to heal.

8. Avoid thinking about him:

One of the best ways to get over your crush is to stop thinking about it. I know it might be difficult, but when you are thinking about him, you've got to dwell on something else.
Avoid thinking about him at all costs. Engage yourself in a hobby that you've never done before, talk to your friends, get into a support group with your family. Keep yourself busy and you'll be able to get over your crush more quickly.

9. Seek support from reliable family members and trustworthy friends:

One of the best ways to try and get over any difficult situation is to seek support. Do you have a friend who has gone through a similar situation and you want her advice? Or maybe you just need someone to listen. Either way, talk to your friends and family members. They can help you sort through your feelings and even offer some sound advice.

10. Keep a good distance from your crush:

It's also a good idea to keep your distance and avoid contact while you're trying to get over your crush. You might not be able to completely avoid seeing or running into your crush if you're friends, work at the same place or go to the same school. But, you can try to make yourself less available and focus on yourself. If he/she doesn't understand, explain that you need some time on your own right now.

I hope these steps help guys and girls in getting over their crush.

SOURCE : 10 Smart Steps To Help You Get Over Your Campus Crush

CertifiedNaija:
Damilola and Segun's meeting is the kind of stuff epic love stories are made of.

The pretty bride-to-be, Damilola shared on her social media page their amazing love story of how she met her heartthrob, Segun inside an elevator at her office building: and  the rest, they say, is history... 

See below via bellanaija:


http://www.certifiednaija.com/2016/12/couple-who-met-inside-elevator-at.html?m=1

clara472:
https://nigerianewstoday.com.ng/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/MMM-Logo.jpg



http://dailypost.ng/2016/12/22/lost-n750-000-mmm-crash-man-drank-insecticide-opens/

IAmOged:
Take ur time to read
solution to the conundrum that a lot of guys face: why does it look like girls like guys that don't give a shit about them?
The usual answers are simplistic: girls want what they can't have; aloof guys look like they have higher value; aloof guys seem more interesting or mysterious, etc… All of these answers are right to a degree, but they dont tell the whole story. So I came up with my own explanation:

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Needy Love: Our society exalts love as the greatest good, the pinnacle of human life, etc… But the problem is that our society sees “love” as purely an emotion.
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What our society calls love I call needy love, defined as a set of ultimately selfish emotions including the desire to have sex, the desire for physical affection, the desire for an ego boost, the desire for validation, etc… This is not a complete list, but the specific emotions are not important – the point is that these emotions are selfish in that they consist of YOU wanting something from the other person without regard for what they want.
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There are, of course, other conceptions of love: the Bible (and many other traditional societies) saw love as a contract between two parties that has little to do with emotion. But our society sees love as purely emotion without the accompanying obligation – when your “emotions” run out, you’ve “fallen out of love” and you can go find somebody else with no consequences.
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The emotions that make up “needy love” are our strongest emotions, so needy love hijacks our thoughts and convinces us we have a deep connection with the other person. People don’t think “Wow I am under the influence of a bunch of extremely strong chemicals in my brain” but instead think “this is my soulmate.”
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That is why “love” is the subject of countless poems, movies, love songs, etc… and an object of worship in our society.
Needy love emotions are different for men and women. Women, for example, feel a strong attraction to “confident” men, whereas men, although they like confident women, don’t have the same emotional reaction to confidence. Men, on the other hand, place more weight on physical appearance than women do. Overall, the checklist that has to be satisfied for women to fall into needy love is much longer than men’s, which is part of the reason women take longer to fall in love and are more“flaky".
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The reason relationships are so hard is that just because you feel needy love towards a woman doesnt mean she feels the same needy love back – they have a different process going on in their brain.
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One of men’s strongest needy love emotions is their overwhelming desire for sex right away, so men “fall in love” and emotionally over-invest in a relationship much quicker than women. Thats why men are a lot more likely to be “creepy” than women –their “needy love” emotions activate much quicker. However, the needy love emotions are much stronger in women and once a woman “falls in love” she is much more likely to become clingy and needy.
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Negative needy love: Here is the dark side of needy love: while the needy love emotions make you feel good for a while, they have an incredibly destructive negative component. Feelings of attachment, sexual desire, acceptance, etc…, can quickly change to neediness, depression, desperation, loneliness, anger, resentment, etc… if the person rejects you. Needy love is like crack – the highs are amazing, but the lows are terrible.
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The Greek philosopher Plato wrote that “erotic” love is ultimately dangerous because it makes you irrationally value a person when they like you, and then irrationally hate them when they don’t. As we all know, love can literally drive a person crazy and cause one to become violent, stalk somebody, fall into deep depression, etc… “Love” has ruined countless people’s lives.
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On a subconscious level everybody knows that a person in the grip of needy love is basically insane.
Vicarious emotions Human beings have a weird ability to feel emotions vicariously through other people. For example, if you see a guy get hit by a car, you feel “bad” for him because you FEEL as if you yourself got hit by a car,. You don’t logically think to yourself “oh that must suck to get hit by a car.”. The Scottish philosopher Adam Smith said the basis for human sympathy is the fact that we feel through the eyes of the others. Thats why you oftentimes don’t have sympathy for people experiencing problems you havent experienced.
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One reason needy love so intense is that you feel the other persons emotions vicariously: not only do you feel your own emotions towards them, but you also literally enter their mind and feel their emotions towards you, so being in love is like an infinite loop of emotions. You love them, you feel them loving you, you then feel them feeling you loving them, etc… It’s insane and part of the reason why “love” is such a complicated mindfuck. But beware: YOU CANNOT ACTUALLY READ THEIR MIND SO YOU PROJECT EMOTIONS ONTO THEIR BRAIN THAT THEY MAY NOT HAVE.
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The main point of this article and the reason why women like men who dont give a shit about them is this: Women are disgusted by needy love. If a woman sees a guy displaying the needy love emotions, she immediately become turned off because she vicariously feels that he is becoming crazy.
She knows that the man WANTS something (not just something, A LOT) from her. This puts pressure on her because now somebody's happiness is dependent on her. She knows that he is constantly thinking about her and if she bleeps up even a little (i.e., forgets to call him back, says something weird, etc…)
he will become angry and disappointed. The bleeped up thing is that we Ladies feel all this subconsciously, so they don’t really know why they are getting turned off: they just know that the guy is doing something that is repelling them.
All women have felt needy love before so when they sense it in somebody else they know exactly what is going on.
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[color=#000055]However, women feel needy love on a much stronger level than men. One thing I have noticed is that the clingiest/neediest women oftentimes give out the harshest rejections – it makes sense: these women reject guys the hardest because they themselves know full well know what its like to be needy and they know its terrifying.
Also, because the needy love emotions are at the forefront of womens minds,
a woman can sense needy love in a guy when he himself doesnt even see it. Worse yet: super attractive women have so many men fall in love with them that they may assume a man is displaying needy love to them even if he isnt.

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Some women (especially women that get hit on a lot) interpret simple, everyday actions by the guy (having polite conversation, buying them a drink) as insane needy love – remember we said that vicariously feeling emotions doesn’t mean that you will actually know what they are feeling. If you're a super hot girl like me in Nigeria in 2016, you have tons and tons of people displaying needy love towards you: the cashier at the Mall,store, your 15 ex-boyfriends who can't get over you, other girls who are jealous of you/want to be you, etc… A person who is genuinely emotionless towards you is a breath of fresh air.
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Finally, beyond the subconscious level, women are turned off by needy love because needy people are just not fun to be around. They agree with everything you say, don’t say anything interesting/provocative, laugh at all your jokes, and don’t challenge you/call you out on your bullshit. Basically you are useless. Furthermore, people under the influence of needy love act irrationally, talk stupid, act creepy, and display more negative emotions (jealousy, disappointment) than positive ones.
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Please keep in mind that our brains can subconsciously pick up a person acting out of needy love, and the signs are often very subtle. Imagine a person saying “hey how are you”? A person can say those same words as a merely nice guy, but another person acting out of needy love will betray their neediness in their body language, tone of voice, eye contact, etc… On a logical level there is no difference, but your subconscious emotions will be able to pick up that the person is displaying needy love.
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That’s why a lot of guys fail when they pretend to not give a shit – they have to actually not give a shit. It is a very delicate dance to not display needy love – you need to carefully choose your words, and you need to monitor your subject closely to see if you are freaking her out. You can be having an amazing time all night but then the slightest nudge of needy love freaks her out and sends her running.
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The point remains: sometimes even a subtle, slight bit of neediness puts the subject on the defensive. Remember, freaking out over needy love is a subconscious process so she may THINK she like you but she feel revulsion if you are being needy.[/color]
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DONT GIRLS WANT TO BE LOVED?
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Well… Not exactly. What women really want is a guy THEY CAN LOVE.As a guy, you need to just get out of the way and let her love you and not say or do anything to Bleep it up. Remember, needy love emotions are selfish, so a girl will send needy love to you all day but then freak out when you send that same needy love back. Of course, girls want certain things from guys, like attention, somebody who will listen to them, sex, etc… Its ok to give those things in the right times and right amounts. But the full panoply of needy love emotions often freaks them out, especially if the guys needy love is stronger than theirs. Another way to put it is this: women want to be loved on a logical level: they want a guy who is attentive, cares about them, isnt needy, isnt selfish, and isnt an asshole.
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Ladies arent impressed with needy love. Also, girls know that the needy love emotions are temporary and wildly fluctuate, so a guy who is under the spell of needy love could easily fall in “love” with another girl tomorrow and leave alone.
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One thing I’ve noticed is that the most “slutty” girls post the most quotes about “love” on their Nairaland profile, Facebook page etc.
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Why is this? They can’t control their emotions and live in a world of needy love, and needy love doesnt actually care about the actual person you love. When somebody else tickles your emotions you move onto them and forget the first person you were needy loving. If you love a girl “logically” you are actually doing her more of a service than if you love her with needy love. Logical love is more solid and pure than needy love.
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So what should a man do? If you want to get a girl to like you, talk to her, be nice to her, joke with her, etc… But just don’t display the needy love emotions. Treat the girl like any other dude you know. Don’t say anything that implies that you “need” anything from her, don’t stare at her too long, don’t follow her around, don’t demand her attention, dont do things for her, etc… If you're out with her, dont make her feel “responsible” for you – make her feel like you could totally walk away and do your own thing and it wouldnt bother you.
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In fact, you should err on the side of slightly being a “dick” because a lot of really hot girls will interpret normal behavior as needy love. It will be hard, because you’ve been taught by society (i.e.,telemundo, romantic comedies and Disney movies) that the way to court girls is to kiss their ass and tell them all about your deep and passionate needy love. And of course your emotions are going to want to make you act needy. Control your emotions! Another danger is that the girl will start showing interest so you will think “its ok for me to start showing needy love now.” No!! Needy love is always bad, and just because you've been making out and staring into each other's eyes doesnt mean its ok to bring out your needy love.
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After some practice, you will be able to snap out of it..
But wont I friendzone myself?
Good question.
Yes, if you completely act emotionless around a girl, we may think you are uninterested. So you need to do 2 things:
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1) Tell Us you are interested. Ask us on a date. A lot of guys are afraid of asking girls on dates because they don’t want to look needy, but if you can ask a girl on a date without displaying needy love you will intrigue and excite her. Its a great deal for her! She can get all the fun and excitement of a date without the burden of dealing with a guy that wants a bunch of shit from her, and
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2) Do all the things you've learned on Nairaland romance section, ashewo bear parlor thread/harddon thread: eye contact, deep, intelligent conversations, kino, escalate, etc… It is possible to do all these things without showing needy love. You may ask: how can one escalate with we ladies sexually without making it look like you want to Bleep Us … well, its an art...sortta push-pull method.
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bashers should backoff....

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CC: Happyjerk, WuOjo, wufredojo
Wildflame

vickjoeobi:
Good Day my fellow nairalanders. Earlier this year and again in September, I brought you information on this forum about the first private science, computer and technology secondary school in Nigeria called Shalom Science and Technology Academy (SSTAC). In fact, the school was actually commissioned by His Excellency Governor IfeanyiUgwuanyi (GburuGburu) in September 2016. Many people made remarks, some positive, some negative and some on the border line of doubt. Well last week, as the first term was coming to an end, I got a call from the school, that I should come and check out an innovation which the Engineering Department of the secondary school built, that will revolutionalise our mobile phone usage. They call it, The rechargeable Mobile Phone Charger. I turned up on Monday the 12/12/2016 and meet with the Director of Admin of the school
The device was produced by the schools Engineering department which houses the “Basic Technology” workshop and “Automobile and Mechanics” workshop which they have here in their our school.
The device which is a bit similar but different from power banks will be used in charging our electronics devices, If there is light, then you can plug in your rechargeable mobile charger and it charges your phone as well as recharges. When the light goes off, then it charges your mobile device as if there was light.
This is a wonderful innovation that should be praised and supported especially when the idea is coming from JSS1 students and they are properly guided by their technology teacher.
They further said that there is plan to commercialize the product after further constructions to make it sleek and create a design for it.
Find below the Images and an excerpt of my interview with the director of Admin.

gisthit:
Xerona and Nela, daughters of former Cross River State Governor Donald Duke pictured at a beach with friends. See photos below


Source - http://www.gisthit.com/2016/12/photos-former-governor-donald-dukes.html

sonofluc1fer:
Good one. Let's all be sane and believe the bastard of a Jewish baby mama died for my sins over 2000 years ago. That is sanity.

Kelechi2020:
i ,ain't a prophet of doom ,neither do I wish ill luck to my friends on MMM....I only apologize for not giving full details on how MMM will likely crash. as at. when I wrote this piece......

as a rejoinder to my first line of thought I wish to state plainly with an unbiased mind that MMM is likely to spring back on the 2nd of January 2017,if and only if mavrodians like us not only pledge to PH but PH on the first working day of the year 2017...

airminem:
I have a 7 month old baby. Ever since the birth, my guy won't get close to me in any sexual way. I have tried everything, but he says he's not in the mood. I don't know what to do or what to think. Please help.

Handsomecole:
Why have girls become this useless all because of money!

Opakan2:
And to think one stupid person will later open a thread on how to treat these "dogs" right..

honestly I wonder how this gender reason.. they don't think like men atal

it's only how to jump from one bed to another, buy makeup and expensive items they know. Afterall one fool will still come and propose marriage to them

whereas guys think about hustle and how to be a good father and husband.. really messed up world we live in

fijiano202:
Sigh!! Things ladies do for money...one innocent guy will be somewhere praying to marry one of this dogs..Yes dogs they have leash na

Girlbestfriend:
Your MOM, YOUR sisters, YOuR grandma, me I believe are all in this class of Apes/gorilla.






no hating

dyabman:
What's paining you now , What was the most expensive thing you bought your man ?

Doctorfitz:
Chai where these kain girls dey sef...nairaland girls will avoid this topic like a plague.

rokiatu:
And she will still get cheated on by this fool.