₦airaland Forum

uptimum123:
Reno the toothless Rhino

He always has something to say

This thing wey him tok sweet me forget. They kip coming to media claiming Nigeria is raining gold and diamond, like say no be the same Naija all of us dey.

Make e accept the challenge na, yeye pipo.

Nonexistent2:
Dump her ass. Did she give you any money to keep for her? I'm sure she is acting up because of the latest bone straight hair trend. I laugh at guys who claim to have girlfriends.

You and me both.

Most of These 'holes' ain't loyal

paulolee:
whenever you do such important tests, try to confirm from 2 or more hospitals because some doctors may mix things up because they are having a bad day that same day you were attended to after all they aint machines..
so sorry about ur story because it sounds pitiful but wait o....who goes for a fertility test after giving birth??
abi u no trust ur wife atall and you are suspecting her already for match fixing about the goal she said you scored??
not surprised because this days, women aint loyal n thats why me i jus dey my lane they avoid women matter..

The best thing a young man can do for himself is to beware of the ladies out there. No go dey overtrust o.

pafra:
You didn't tell us how much school fee paid. With the raised in the cost of food it we should be able to compare and justify your claim.

Moreover, the kids have been at home for so many months due to the pandemic it is logical the add weight during the lock down.

Lost in weight is inevitable in a new environment.

ACADEMIC stress could be a contributing factor.

I am sure you weren't expecting him to add more weight while in school so, why the attention seeking

Thank you, in addition, the boy cud v also being sick around that period in which case he would regain his weight.

Attention seeker sought and fount the attention.

daddyiel:
2 years ago I saw $100 CAD x 3pcs in Okirika joggers when I got home ,I went back the next day and search half of the women's goods pretending I want to buy another one

hahaha the woman don suspect you she don dey check the pocket everyday

Baiser:
Lol.... Yuan no just get value for naija...

Imagine its dollar, maybe u go send covid 19

$15 = #7k

wow

RealGboy:
After secondary school I have been living from one uncle house to another .I ran away when I realized they are not ready to help me but use me for thier house chores ..

I have a friend who lived in one room face me I face you.. he works as a bar man..when he heard my story he allowed me stayed with him , naso the journey start ...

I started looking for salary jobs I could do. But I couldn't find any .
It was during one of my job hunt I met one woman that told me she needs someone that would be her driver ..

I have never driven a car in my life but when I heard she will pay 70k per month.. I quickly told her I can drive ,
She did not even wait to confirm ,she just told me to resume the next morning cos she have somewhere important I would be driving her too...

See gobe... I reach house and told my friend ,he laughed And told me to call her and tell her I'm not interested in the job ..i told him I can't do that ,.as we were still discussing,his neighbor in the next room joined the conversation ...

(The rooms are so closed together that if u drop a cup ,the next room will hear ,)
He shouted " don't tell her u can't drive oo , just wait I dey come '..

When he entered our room he then explained to me that driving is easy if the car is automatic..he said guy see
"Once you enter,start the car , place your leg on the right hand pad slowly which is the break and then put the gear to R (reverse) or D (drive). ... Simple .

So I spent the next three hours learning how to drive automatic cars from brother Thomas that is an okada man...

When I resumed the next day at work like a real driver ...the woman gave me a car key then told me to go and warm the car before we leave..
I quickly go to her Benz and press car key but na the Hilux truck sound pin pin...I realized we would be taking the Hilux and not her Benz Jeep...
When I opened the Hilux I was shocked..I saw 3 leg pads instead of 2 that brother Thomas told me ...

I carry phone call brother Thomas...he was already on his okada ,I explained my situation..he then told me " Na manual be that na ..and na the same thing..Guy wise up "...

See kasala.... The woman came out fully dressed and entered the car ,na so I start the car but as a wise guy I acted as if the car is faulty, I open bonnet and told her .we can't go out with this car..

She called her mechanic and insulted him for spoiling her car:,she then went in and brought out the Benz car key...

My mind came down ..once we enter I follow brother Thomas instructions,and I put the gear to R ..
As the car was reversing slowly and I was leaving the gate . Next thing I heard someone screaming " yeeeee My leg ooooooooo".....
The idiot gateman had stayed too close to the car thinking I can drive and me don scatter his leg with tire ...

Me and my madam was scared. I personally thought someone died , when I got down and I saw the gateman scattered leg, I told him sorry no vex..
But lucky for me the madam did not blame me , she told me she had warn him several times to always stay far from the car ... She gave him some cash to get medicine ..

We enter car back , a little scared . At this point something told me to confess I can't drive .

But another mind said "Continue but be careful'..
I reversed out, put the car to drive , press acceleration pad and the journey started ...
At first it felt Good..like play like play Nonso don Sabi drive be that
.. everything was going well because the road was free and less traffic.
Na so madam tell me make I stop beside Tastee fried Chicken, she gave me some money and told me to help her get something cos she has not eaten yet .

I wanted to off the car but she told me to leave it on cos she was enjoying the A c .
Now the werey called brother Thomas forget to teach me that once u want to stop in traffic or anywhere put the gear to P (park)
Me I just get down from the car like that and the gear is still on D (Drive)
Next thing I heard madam voice screaming my name "Nonso ooooooooo" .... I turn back And both madam and car don dey go ..

Omo I started pursuing the car , screaming jesus!! madam o Madam o...
People joined me too ... but the car was moving very fast.. and was heading to a police checkpoint.
When police saw the car and people at the back running after it they thought the driver is a thief , they brought out thier gun and pointed to the car indicating that if it don't stop they will shoot ... As my madam see Gun..

She jumped out of the running car with her fat body ,
She landed like an elephant and was rolling like ball before she stopped...
When I saw this I know my own had finished...
I started crying and cursing brother Thomas for encouraging me ...







Pls comment if u would like to hear the remaining story...

Comic relief
nice story

truthfulparrot:
I said it before that the government is empowering the bandits by not being proactive in taking the fight to them. Watch how bandits will intestify the kidnapping of school kids now that they know the government will rush to negotiate and pay for their release. The proceeds of ransom will then be used to buy more arms
We are in this vicious cycle because PMB failed to take assertive and proactive actions as the commander in chief. Is it rocket science to replace non-performing service chiefs with competent generals? Is it rocket science to empowered the capacity of our military to go on offensive against bandits and terrorists?
Why are we playing politics with our security?

Tell me about it.

The output might not always be any different from this when a country so huge n diverse as Nigeria is being run by people who have no leadership ideas.

Two words - Incompetent Government

dimexy247:
What kind of a ridiculous reason is that? He must remain in jail to avoid stories that touch. Once a terrorist is always...........

Sounds like a decision only the present government in Nigeria would take..

Las las this US na upgraded NAIJA.

Jeremiih:
I have made it clear, but seems she's that flirting type. Telling my bro may cause problems. But I will strictly tell her to stop. Thanks

OP she fit turn the story on you o, you better fear women. Abi una no dey read Bible ni.

Tell her off sternly, then tell your bro so he can be a witness in future (incase she accuses you falsely due to your rejection)but he has to promise not to tell his friend.

dfos2k:
Ok. As a person I got exposed to sex and porn quite early (11!) So I can relate to your son. As a father now I can also relate to your fears because of the bad effect such early exposure to porn had on me. Thread carefully, go too hard and you'll loose him to the dark world of pornography and masturbation. Try this:
1. Take him to a place private and offer to watch the porn in his phone with him! What! He'll say no! Then build on that no and tell him lovingly but firmly the bad effects the practice can have on him now and in the future.
2. Be open and tell him to approach you or call you (even when He's not at home) whenever the urge comes up.
3. Be patient and prayerfully follow up on his progress maybe monthly. NB. Don't use it to abuse him before his siblings or dad, neither should it be an everyday topic. Pornography is demonic, Jehovah is your strength.

Excellent idea. Some people do not understand Porn is a spirit. People curse themselves, cut themselves to stop but can't.

Flogging the kid will make matters worst surely. I think he can still be saved if you follow the advice quoted or allow him explore and in the nearest future he will be opening nairaland threads on "How to Stop Masturbation"

phelonrays:
Out grow what ??

Did you know how many years it took me to finally take a stand and Say No to Porn ??

Porn is considered worst among numerous Addiction facing humans; as it is done in Private/Secret unlike others [gambling, alcohol etc]..


Please Mam, disregard the advice quoted above, Scorn your son to register your displeasure about his 'new acquired habit'..

If not late, introduce Sex Education...
Let him Know the true nature of himself..
Enforce and regulate the main purpose the phone was presented to him...


#SayNoToPorn..

SCORN is the worst advice. Look the best thing OP can do is to have a warm talk with him. For all we know d boy has been watching porn since 13 and wanking to it.

You can never really stop him by yourself. Lecture him friendly on the havoc pornography and masturbation wreaks on the brain, on relationships, on self-esteem, on productivity, on body structure etc, even let him know he it is a sin and God frowns at it. Draw him also closer to God but keep in mind that he will be the one to call the last shot, no matter how hard you try to influence the situation.

END TIME TINZ

Nazgul:
She has clearly told you that you stand to benefit nothing from her if you go ahead with the marriage plans..

...except the sex on every last Thursday of every month.

It's not a bad idea to set a lady up so she can afford anything for herself and kids but when the mentality is bluntly negative, you have to think twice.

I'd advice to talk to her tho. At times the something in hand is worth 10 somethings in the bush. The gals out there rn are mostly rough. No go run from frypan enter fire.

The Holy Bible is free of charge.

@OP I hope you mentor and monitor them for a while after selling them the book, I hate for them to feel exploited.

Jake19:
Which kind Uganda be this one?
Cc lalasticlala

All these ladies sef, see what poor kids are going thru because uu think it is imperative you hire someone to take care of ur maid.

Then every ill treatment they get from you, they transfer to the harmless little ones.

MrTAnonymous:
Girls Are Quick To Lose Feelings When A Guy Makes These 4 Mistakes

Girls are very observant, there are certain things that put them off or on when they chat with a guy online. Girls are like locks waiting for someone with the right key to open them up.

Below are 4 mistakes guys make when chatting with a girl online,

1. When guys confess their feelings over text too quickly
I understand that when a guy has feelings for a girl, it literally hurts so much they want to tell her how they feel really quick so they just confess their feelings over text and expect her to agree to be his girlfriend immediately. No, this is a mistake you shouldn’t do. Rather you should watch how things play out between you and her and if you notice that she might be having feelings for you then you can ask her how she feels about you.

2. Sending “nice guy” text
By nice guy texts, I mean the overly repetitive ones where you check up on here every now and then. For instance, you keep sending her texts like “have you eaten?” “How was your night?” “What did you eat?”, etc. These kind of texts are boring and would make you appear needy.

3. Being too available
When you are always in her inbox, you are already giving away too much. It would make her get tired of you quickly and you have already eliminated any form of mystery you had and the chances of her missing you. Girls love guys who are mysterious, who are like puzzles they want to figure out. I’m not saying you shouldn’t check up on her, do so but still give room for mystery.

4. Giving up too soon
Most girls like playing hard to get not because they don’t like you but because they love the chase and attention you give to them. Most guys simply give up because they weren’t patient enough to get her to open up to him.

https://ng.opera.news/ng/en/sex-relationship/amp/0095008f62a554ff86c24b07f30842c5

OP all these things you are saying, The guy never get money reach na Y.

Make e still go hustle small.

I don sabi since tey tey say No body Holy for this life. These pipo just dey use phone dey cast themselves anyhow.

lkillbrokehoes:
Discussing about what? instead of you people to swing to action you are discussing with kidnappers, this is the worst government ever jeez!

Whether staged or not, it's a national disgrace he comes forth to the public to say he is discussing with them local kidnappers. More than 300 kids, not even 5.

Ah

tosomaju:
For two years you didn't know all these about lady A and in few months you are already certain lady B is all you want?
My brother they go use your destiny play ludo.
Kantinew its like they are doing you.

Exactly my question. How is he sure lady B sef is not disguising. I felt once beaten means twice shy.

OP YOU NEED TO CALM DOWN. Most of these babes are opportunists and they are not smiling.

OP is one of the problems we have in Nigeria. Which one is Pregnanting again?

Our own AJ.

Gmail and all google services are down.

If you wanna make everyone happy, go sell ice cream.

SilverNorGold:
We have unscrupulous southern elements pretending to be Northerners just to mock us, even here on Nairaland. Members like Kaduna1stSon, Yenefer, etc are examples. They start by praising our beloved father, President Mohammadu Buhari and Northerners and then subsequently unleashing their anti-North agenda.. They don't mean well for us. So they can continue to fool themselves..

That said, I strongly condemn the Kankara GSS attack. The government should do everything possible to arrest the situation and bring the perpetrators to book! More military personnel should be deployed as a matter of urgency to ensure that all civilians are safe and sound. Nothing must happen to anyone otherwise the repercussion may not augur well for the government.. But I strongly believe in the leadership/capability of President Mohammadu Buhari and I am 100% sure he'll handle this issue professionally and intelligently, being an experienced, brilliant and intelligent retired General.

While we await the outcome, I appeal to my brothers and sisters in the North to remain calm and patient.

God bless Nigeria.

The rest of una go soon get sense. At least the unpaid ones.

Haha

ofeco:
Atiku please return to your flat in Dubai and continue enjoying your loot. criminal. As for Mr anti kworoption one day the poor will have nothing to eat but the rich and wicked polithiefians.

That time is now, and those poors have only been eating fellow poors.

BlessedNuel:
I ain't in shock atall

This

Okuns007:
The best thing to do is to do the following;
1. get married
2. Delete all porn related videos and pictures on your phone
3. Try to always stay around people, avoid isolated place
4. Though, it is difficult to adjust to this, stay offline as much as possible
5. Go for deliverance.

This is my opinion and it has really worked for me...

The people that say being busy or not being alone won't work are madly addicted and if care is not taken only repercussions can help them stop. I think they need deliverance n serious monitoring.

If yours is not yet that bad, dnt stay alone a lot, try not to be idle, control and restrict yourself and dirty things you v access to, and above all let Holy Spirit guide you.

It won't be easy but it's worth it.

Sebi na this one we see. In other parts of the same government, people are using #15bn to plant mango n pawpaw.

But they kip ensuring masses are more impoverished on a daily basis.

irepnaija4eva:
I keep wondering why this government handles these bandits, kidnapping up in the north with kid gloves...

Stop wondering. Step back a little and look at the full picture as a whole not as multiple pieces.