₦airaland Forum

Make una stop na

Queenisha:
Is that what you're using to wazzle them in ekwulobia?
that you're doing pre med?
abeg make I go laugh finish.
premed my hammer toes.
doing maths and English sprinkled with anatomy in Houston community college and you already feel like a board certified physician.
I say meet me after 8 years,let's talk

For your info,you're better off choosing a major and getting a proper degree before you waste your parent's money galivanting from course to course taking courses.
I've seen many failed cases like yours.

EWOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why you abuse am like that

motun_rayo:
No prob. , . .just stating my opinion. . . . . . the truth

FATAL RUBBISH!
You should become a lesbian. _{Tell us if bumping titties/pussy satisfies you.}
beef kor, pork ni.
[center]how are you ? [/center]

Feministic:
Ah, that part in bold is the real question, isn't it? In fact there is actually are very few feminists that are willing to ponder this question ( hence, why I know little to no other feminists LOL), seeing it as a "distraction" ( or whatever else they can pass it off as),

Do you ever wonder why they're afraid to answer the question?

but I have pondered this question personally and what I've come to think is that people in general are very "sheep-like", very few are born with (or able to develop) the ability to truly think for themselves, to question why they themselves do the things they do.

Male or female, very few are born with the ability to question what has been established. We're talking einstein, freudian territory now . . .

Then there are the few of us that are willing to ask questions, such as the ones I ask and the one you just asked me. I do think that the majority of women have a sort of, passivity that can serve as both a weapon and a wound. It allows women to "pick their battles" so to speak, more precisely than most men, but then it leads to never wanting to fight for anything at all, or never seeing the point in it, it's this attitude that I think has carried most of the weight for holding us back for so long.

In other words, some women choose to become "weak and sheepish" . They refused to question the actual cause of their problem. Men are not the ones responsible for it.

I will also agree that the majority of men seem to have a certain thirst for authority or dominance whether or not it is actually deserved or appropriate.

Correct.

Humans may technically be animals, but just because something "feels" right doesn't always means it is.

If it is the same way everyone around you lives, it will feel normal and you wouldn't venture out of that comfort zone. Environment has a profound impact on the way we live our lives.

Humans have also been proven to follow more than lead, its obvious in the way that trends, advertising, fear, etc works so well in society. I think that naturally men and women will be able to shrug off these roles with time, in the form of natural sociocultural evolution.

Maybe the day religion dies . . . . . but as you and I know, that's never going to happen. Unless you know something I don't know? Perhaps you're miss cleo and you can predict the future!

I mean lets be honest, in the 1910's would you have ever thought a woman could drive a car or a man could babysit his kids for even once? I mean, you're talking about sitting with the kids and and acknowledging that your wife may be "too tired to cook"?The idea was unheard of! ( American wives in colonial times would sometimes come from working in the fields and be made to make dinner in a "bitch i want chicken!" style LOL) The roles as slowly loosened up over time and I think that with time they will just "evaporate" with time.

As is always the case, when you challenge the way a "people" live, change occurs very slowly. The Nigerian populace is so far sunken into religion that I don't think our generation (and maybe even the next) will accept women as potential "heads" of their household.

As for those of us that would like the shrug off that stereotype ( and truthfully, I do think that a lot of women are just not thinking, especially to how fast they bend to men's, the economy and other womens wills and expectations), may be whats "coming next" (Note to self: find a way to sound more like a pompous asshole, come on! you can do it, ) I mean, more educated, more thoughtful and opinionated, etc; and in a country where that is not usually taken well from women, it does (naturally) arouse some anger ,

Believe me, the asshole route is not the best way to do it. It might land you that "common slap" like the one you had when you were 13. . I don't agree perse that they are unthoughtful or void of opinion because of the roles they play. I'm sure they have those opinions and express it amongst themselves when mama Ngozie is gossiping with Mama Kolawole, but when it comes to being outspoken a lot of them are timid. We had some strong women in Nigeria's past (like the female pioneers on television) . There just isn't enough of them to speak some sense into the others. There biggest problem is lack of orchestration and organization if anything. They can gossip but won't call themselves together to do anything about it.

I think that if society as a whole could accept women like this as individuals and not as a bunch of stuck up brats who don't know "their place", then we can surely have harmony. AND due to the fact that men have obviously made some great changes over time as well, I amjust more encouraged to think that it will all happen on its own, with the right people and at the right time.

Wow! You gave men credit too, how sweet.
It could happen and I'm not saying it won't, but you should know that we have very many societies with different laws governing them. Almost all societies base their laws on some type of religious propaganda. There in lies YOUR problem.

michelin89:
Please add handicap!

HAHAHAHAHA As you wish.

Feministic:
It was based on happiness, mostly the happiness of men who were carrying the title of "head".
After all, if women were so "happy" then why would they "nag"?
LOL @ the "unhappy women" comment!
Men seem to enjoy passing off women's objections as "whining", "nagging", or "bitching" in or to make our opinions seem worthless.

LOL!  Tell me you flinched while typing that    .  In addition to what I said previously, the unhappy women who could not put aside their "ego" for the sake of family unity, push to become male-hating/bashing feminists.  These same women who were once fine with their wifely roles, did not begin nagging until Western culture brainwashed them with the talk of "inferiority".  The gullible women who accepted that, somehow, 'taking care of the home' makes them inhumane decided to join the feminist group, without proper guidance.  Men are just sick of being called misogynists when all they're doing is loving you and playing their God-enshrined roles as men.  The lazy women of nowadays believe a "housewife" is somehow abnormal.

sisi, I understand wetin you talk, no worry. When the love is there the other part will take care of itself. I'm blushing. . . is this . . . are you signaling me a message

Feministic:
My sister was diagnosed with Autism around the age of 4 and i was diagnosed with ADD around the age of 12.
I have always noticed that people, especially Nigerians, do not and are not willing to put aside their little knowledge on this subject in order to really understand and accept it, but what used to be anger in me has now turned to pity

Ahh how cute! How did you deal with it?

Feministic:
@ HCH3COO aw, I knew you missed me LOL

Don't flatter yourself  _{aww I admit I did miss you}

Which is one of the problems that I do have with any kind of formal religion, I see no problem with people's personal faith and see no harm in it, but when both those who do and don't [/i]follow a certain doctrine are effected by it's influence then it not only becomes an inconvenience but also hinders natural sociocultural progress.

Popular consensus agrees that majority rules.  The majority are deeply-rooted religionists.  When we become too concerned about the effects of established laws on those who disagree with them, we are shortchanging our societal stability.  Afterall, a rapist too will disagree with laws which oppose raping right?

I agree with this entirely.

OMG! You agree again.  I am beginning to think you will make a very good submissive wife.   

and it is one the the greatest tragedies of our nation, that in out own country we can not excersise our minds to our full potentials, but abroad Nigerians are usually marveled at (labeled with ) for their intelligence. Again, I do think that it is something that we will have to do for ourselves, their are people that

There are people like that but they are in the minority.  How will you go about lobbying for the change?

Well I can only truthfully speak for my area, but the job market round here is reaaaaaaaaaaalllllly tightening up, since high school graduates/college students are now competing for jobs with adults over 30 that didn't go to college, this fact is turning me into an "ageist" I do think that people will just have to manage here in US till things get better and people get smarter.

Not only are you a feminist you are also an "ageist", applause.  "Managing" is very unbecoming of a feminist.  Your prerogative is to hate and say no to oppression no matter what.  By managing you might want to reconsider your ideals.

Yea I agree with that a lot!

Since you're beginning to agree with everything I say.  Do you also agree that you could possibly fall in love with ME, or anyone else who prioritizes religion in their everyday life?
my email is on my profile if you want to give it a go

Infact, LOL, my mom taught me [i]that when i tried to send my sister to bed without eating cause she didn't rake the leaves (or something just as dumb, hey i was petty when i was 13, sue me ),

MY GOODNESS!!! Meanie.  You began practicing feminism on your "sister" at the tender age of 13 . . . tell me something else I don't know please 

"You never, ever, EVER punish people with food!, EVER *common naija slap*" Which is true, I mean, thats just sinister!

Good gosh my ribs hurt.  Take that you sucker! I hope you have learned your lesson!

Ugh, are you serious? Maybe Freud was right about people and their "Death Wish", but not with me, I'm one of the "freaks" *stirs pot of egusi soup*
I think the reluctance that most people have to eat healthy foods (when they are available) is just another part of people's "sheep-like" traits, I mean, so what if it is modern, easy to get and advertised everywhere? It makes you sick!

To your delight, maybe you will find this amusing, they wanted to "fatten up" to look more appealing to the guy.  Remember I mentioned generational changes?   In those prior years the men wanted women with meat on their bodies - the big beautiful curvaceous women - not the skinny anorexic ones we're used to seeing today.

I agree with all of this to ,

             
I am totally disappointed in you.  This discussion is no longer fun. 

It all depends on who you are and what will work for you as an individual and the most important thing is that you and you're family are happy with the life you have chosen. This is another reason why I don't agree with many feminists on the whole"family structure", idea

You mean even feminists disagree with each other too ?      Course i'm joking!

I want to have kids, love to cook, have to be sure my house is clean (tidyness calms me ) and why i want to be heavily involved in my work I would most likely slow it down after a few children and to some feminists this equals "brainwashed", i mean honestly, the whole point of "feminism" to me is women and men getting the most out of each other, I mean we can't just push each other onto separate islands, or [i]can [/i]we? *evil scientist cackle*

LOL! Push into separate  islands my black foot.  When women start itching for the nine-inch-nail, who is going to provide it?  I think we are doing just fine being together.  Since you love to cook, please contact me through email.  I am interested in applying for your "hubby" position, if it is still vacant.

you are right, and again I can't go around shoving pamphlets in peoples faces at the village, or [i]can [/i]I? But I will sit back and let nature take it course, there will always be people that see to be a bit "behind".
On the second part, I also agree and will admit that my perspective is limited on that, since the I rarely see families like the one you just described, what I usually see is; men, who may act out towards their working wives in fear of losing authority, which is sad to me.

Those men in fear of losing authority are insecure men.  When they begin maltreating their wives they get scared that she will leave them, because she can do just fine on her own too.  If you love your woman and  treat her with a healthy level of respect she will not have a reason to leave you unless she's the devil molded into human's skin.

HAHAHAHAHAHA @ the part in bold! Yea, that really all there is to it, find what works for you, I'm just tired of seeing people let outside opinions and ideas control their actions in personal relationships, but then again a lot of people just aren't very independent in their thinking.

It's okay to use outside opinions as a bowl of ideas that can essentially help you determine what you do decide to do, but if you embrace hypocrisy and wife inequity as part of the madness, you are in the wrong.  Even the bible which teaches that the man is the head of the household, enforces that the man must treat his wife with the same care, love, humility as  he does himself. 

Yep, they are there! But I'm not sure if we are at the point where we can "name" them yet so *Shhhhhhhhhh!*

I hope you don't seek out a man like that.  You are playing with serious turmoil  .

You can be the head of your household and still love your wife as you love yourself. The women in question here are those unwilling to submit.

dreeldee:
only men who haven't seen what will make them cry still use the word "Real men don't cry"

probably.

onyinye2:
Please elaborate.

I beg your pardon?

Men cry too but not as easily.

chiogo:
It's a pity that some people here are deceiving themselves. Anywayz, I am soo outt@ here! Y'all have fun deluding yourselves.

But but but . . . .
The truth pill is bitter to swallow.

Okija_juju:
@ Topic

I will use this bible passage as quoted by brother H₂O as the main reason why I cannot marry a Naija babe abroad.
Nigerian chicks have a very interesting brain. When once they sit on any flight that takes them out of Naija, even if Na Benin or Togo, they all of a sudden become oyinbos and Ajebutters. Can you imagine a husband coming home to KFC chicken and fries for dinner??

How can you marry a girl that is virtually bigger than you. Naija girls wey don jand and yank are different from the Naija chicks at home o!. It's like when once they breathe oyinbo air, their brains will just format, they loose all they were taught in Naija. Can you imagine a wife turning off the T.V set and telling him to go do the dishes, ^{she smoke weed??} . When once they go abroad they start watching Oprah and Tyra and their lives becomes janded. All of a sudden they can quote everything in the constitution about women liberty, they start talking about female empowerment, gender equality, and all that other rubbish. Imagine you telling a yankee based, Naija chick to go and pound yam for you, that day she'll show you explain to you that the marriage is 50/50. When once you marry them it is goodbye garri, ewedu, ofe Nsala, Pounded yam _{(Not yam flour o!)} , ugba and opkoroko, everything tradition flies out the window, in comes Subway, KFC, Pizza hut, Macdonalds, Starbucks, e.t.c.

_{Chukwu ekwe kwa na ka ngwere gba aghi.}

Their yawa too much my brother. Instead go back home, travel to your village, and pick a wife. sho ti gbo!

lol you have killed me with laughter o.

of all the words being used here i wonder why 'submit' is the hardest to understand.

onyinye2:
keep that part in mind.

the most important word was "Accept" yet you missed it.

I think you are the one in confusion here.  Submit is as simple as it gets.
Look up the word "submit" on dictionary.com  , pick the one that fancies you most, one that is appropriate, and apply it here.  Either way, submit is what it is.

p.s. the bible is still a composition of the word of God, even if it was written by an alien.

chiogo:
Go to bed at 6:54 pm??

Yes, I am a christian. What, then??

The scripture below is because you asked about submission.
Okay what do you make of this passage:

"Wives submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, even as Christ is head of the church; and he is the savior of the body. Therefore as the church is subject to Christ, so let wives be to their own husbands in everything. "
- Ephesians 5:

nyabinghi:
If men no look una, una go wan die. If them look una una go resort to name calling. God deliver us from these Aguo's in Human Skin. me no send women sha.

necroposter.

So you're just talkative, not exactly a feminist by nature. Okay that just about settles it.

Feministic where art thee o

chiogo:
Submit coo, turn in nee. Na paper them dey submit or what? Nobody is yet to explain to me what is meant by 'submit'. Pheww, Roflmcao.

See why I called you a feminist.    .  I will answer you after you respond to this question: are you a christian?

lol

I agree she did sometimes, but the generalizations made me sick.
Like this one:

If  most men didn't already have an aura of stupidity around them

By gutsy you mean . . . ?

ibkaye:
40 and single!? olorun ma je

With the way these girls refuse to submit Olorun ti JE.

By the time you're 40 and still single you will beg to marry an area boy.

chiogo:
L0L, it's true now! I personally don't want to marry a Nigerian dude living in Nigeria. it has nothing to do with money or promiscuity. It's my personal preference, right?? Since y'all say it's a matter of preference.

blue-sky:
same here! can't imaging marrying a guy living in nigeria.

onyinye2:
Same here too!

That's not what the thread is about.

onyin your case is special. you are better off with a white boy.

So you're a feminist too. No wonder. Birds of the same feather will always flock together.

bigkayy:
Engineered the success in terms not admonishing their partners about the importance of accountability and transparency as a public-office holder or being an active participant in siphoning public-fund into their personal account all in the name of a futile pet project?

Is this your definition of success?

Success indeed.

chiogo:
Yes, you are very right!!

So, as y'all can see, some Nigerian girls living abroad do not want to marry Nigerian guys living in Nigeria. Their own preference!

roflmao   .

Orikinla:
I discovered her when she was only 14 and she had all the classic features of a black beauty, but she had unsteady carriage that was normal for her tender age. She was from Edo State in Nigeria, but many who saw her photographs said she looked like a Ghanaian girl. I concentrated on the older models until she came of age years later. She was now 21 and a student of Lagos State University. She was tall and with a perfect figure 8 and chocolate in colour. She was now more confident and had the carriage. So I took her to Modela (Bayo Adegbe) and registered as one of his models. She made her mark under Modela and I attended one of Bayo Adegbe's first fashion shows where Joy glowed on the runway. She was even more attractive than the model who catwalked topless. At the party later in the night, I let the younger man I brought along to enjoy himself whilst I relaxed as she attracted the attention of some guys. She knew how to keep the wolves at bay. She had already dated one of my buddies before he left Nigeria and when he returned he found her irresistible. He was not the only one who found Joy irresistible. Guys ogled at her on our street.

She was well bred and disciplined. Her mother and family trusted her. She passed nights in the flat where I stayed and was well loved by all the guys in the house.
She was excited one fine day as she rushed into the flat and told me that she had removed a dental flaw and to show my appreciation, I hugged and kissed her.
I was very happy for her.

Then Modela got her the Glo Billboard advert and she was paid hundreds of thousands of naira. I was happy for her success.
That was over four years ago.

I have not seen Joy since 2004, and during one of my visits to Lagos, she wanted to see
me, but I was too busy to see her.

Joy will be 28 soon and what I wish for her now is a good husband to do his best to love her and start a beautiful family with her.

Joy, stay bold and beautiful and let your beauty continue to glow.

God will take good care of you as long as you hold on to Him.

oriki, I'm sure Joy will appreciate your thoughts of her - nice.

DeepZone:
Whatever!!!!! Behind every successful man, there must be a woman that engineered the success.

Successfully advising him to embezzle Nigeria's money.