₦airaland Forum

You tink say Araba deh refund money, OK siddon dia no come push.

I do it only because, as a good citizen, their advert says "Destroy this to avoid adulteration ". I thought It's my duty to prevent adultery in marriages. But now I know better. You will only understand my post if your IQ has been updated to the recent firmware, OS, etc.

So the guy just Zidanised the poor girl. Well, Say No to Domestic violence and Yes to industrial violence.

I know it's stale but this guy should go back to creche I know it's stale but this guy should go back to creche

So a twelve year old can challenge the Almighty Lagos state government on an issue and was given attention, whereas the mighty Fela, Dele Giwa, Ken Wiwa and the Ever green Soyinka were treated as persona non grata (mind you, I know what it means ). Am I the only one that thinks Muslims employ a dirty tactics to draw sympathy from the world?
Is Lagos not a muslim state?

I will call my own "saw-year" if think its Patrick na you sabi.

I thought Am the only one that doesn't fancy goat meat. Anyway, its not that I hate goat meat but my system doesn't like much meat, just a little beef, little chicken and a little fish. As funny as this may sound but I can eat my food without any meat.

I was expecting someone to bring an argument that they should rather name their sons Lionel instead of messi. Well, I stand corrected.

To go with the crowd makes you a slave, zombie to be precised. Terry G is talented and a unique individual. He adopted a style that suite him, please respect that.

I came across this on the internet, it's so funny. Thought I should share. Enjoy

MURPHY'S LAW OF COMBAT
1. Friendly fire - isn't.
2. Recoilless rifles - aren't.
3. Suppressive fires - won't.
4. You are not Superman; Marines and fighter
pilots take note.
5. A sucking chest wound is Nature's way of
telling you to slow down.
6. If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid.
7. Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be
low on ammo and not want to waste a bullet on
you.
8. If at first you don't succeed, call in an air
strike.
9. If you are forward of your position, your
artillery will fall short.
10. Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than
yourself.
11. Never go to bed with anyone crazier than
yourself.
12. Never forget that your weapon was made by
the lowest bidder.
13. If your attack is going really well, it's an
ambush.
14. The enemy diversion you're ignoring is their
main attack.
15. The enemy invariably attacks on two
occasions: a. When they're ready. b. When you're
not.
16. No OPLAN ever survives initial contact.
17. There is no such thing as a perfect plan.
18. Five second fuses always burn three seconds.
19. There is no such thing as an atheist in a
foxhole.
20. A retreating enemy is probably just falling
back and regrouping.
21. The important things are always simple; the
simple are always hard.
22. The easy way is always mined.
23. Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy
other people to shoot at.
24. Don't look conspicuous; it draws fire. For this
reason, it is not at all uncommon for aircraft
carriers to be known as bomb magnets.
25. Never draw fire; it irritates everyone around
you.
26. If you are short of everything but the enemy,
you are in the combat zone.
27. When you have secured the area, make sure
the enemy knows it too.
28. Incoming fire has the right of way.
29. No combat ready unit has ever passed
inspection.
30. No inspection ready unit has ever passed
combat.
31. If the enemy is within range, so are you.
32. The only thing more accurate than incoming
enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
33. Things which must be shipped together as a
set, aren't.
34. Things that must work together, can't be
carried to the field that way.
35. Radios will fail as soon as you need fire
support.
36. Radar tends to fail at night and in bad
weather, and especially during both).
37. Anything you do can get you killed, including
nothing.
38. Make it too tough for the enemy to get in, and
you won't be able to get out.
39. Tracers work both ways.
40. If you take more than your fair share of
objectives, you will get more than your fair share
of objectives to take.
41. When both sides are convinced they're about
to lose, they're both right.
42. Professional soldiers are predictable; the
world is full of dangerous amateurs.
43. Military Intelligence is a contradiction.
44. Fortify your front; you'll get your rear shot up.
45. Weather ain't neutral.
46. If you can't remember, the Claymore is
pointed towards you.
47. Air defense motto: shoot 'em down; sort 'em
out on the ground.
48. 'Flies high, it dies; low and slow, it'll go'.
49. The Cavalry doesn't always come to the
rescue.
50. Napalm is an area support weapon.
51. Mines are equal opportunity weapons.
52. B-52s are the ultimate close support weapon.
53. Sniper's motto: reach out and touch
someone.
54. Killing for peace is like screwing for virginity.
55. The one item you need is always in short
supply.
56. Interchangeable parts aren't.
57. It's not the one with your name on it; it's the
one addressed "to whom it may concern" you've
got to think about.
58. When in doubt, empty your magazine.
59. The side with the simplest uniforms wins.
60. Combat will occur on the ground between two
adjoining maps.
61. If the Platoon Sergeant can see you, so can
the enemy.
62. Never stand when you can sit, never sit when
you can lie down, never stay awake when you can
sleep.
63. The most dangerous thing in the world is a
Second Lieutenant with a map and a compass.
64. Exceptions prove the rule, and destroy the
battle plan.
65. Everything always works in your HQ,
everything always fails in the Colonel's HQ.
66. The enemy never watches until you make a
mistake.
67. One enemy soldier is never enough, but two is
entirely too many.
68. A clean (and dry) set of BDU's is a magnet
for mud and rain.
69. The worse the weather, the more you are
required to be out in it.
70. Whenever you have plenty of ammo, you never
miss. Whenever you are low on ammo, you can't
hit the broad side of a barn.
71. The more a weapon costs, the farther you will
have to send it away to be repaired.
72. The complexity of a weapon is inversely
proportional to the IQ of the weapon's operator.
73. Field experience is something you don't get
until just after you need it.
74. No matter which way you have to march, its
always uphill.
75. If enough data is collected, a board of inquiry
can prove anything.
76. For every action, there is an equal and
opposite criticism. (in boot camp)
77. Air strikes always overshoot the target,
artillery always falls short.
78. When reviewing the radio frequencies that you
just wrote down, the most important ones are
always illegible.
79. Those who hesitate under fire usually do not
end up KIA or WIA.
80. The tough part about being an officer is that
the troops don't know what they want, but they
know for certain what they don't want.
81. To steal information from a person is called
plagiarism. To steal information from the enemy
is called gathering intelligence.
82. The weapon that usually jams when you need
it the most is the M60.
83. The perfect officer for the job will transfer in
the day after that billet is filled by someone else.
84. When you have sufficient supplies & ammo,
the enemy takes 2 weeks to attack. When you are
low on supplies & ammo the enemy decides to
attack that night.
85. The newest and least experienced soldier will
usually win the Medal of Honor.
86. A Purple Heart just proves that were you
smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to
try it, and lucky enough to survive.
87. Murphy was a grunt.
88. Beer Math --> 2 beers times 37 men equals
49 cases.
89. Body count Math --> 3 guerrillas plus 1
probable plus 2 pigs equals 37 enemies killed in
action.
90. The bursting radius of a hand grenade is
always one foot greater than your jumping range.
91. All-weather close air support doesn't work in
bad weather.
92. The combat worth of a unit is inversely
proportional to the smartness of its outfit and
appearance.
93. The crucial round is a dud.
94. Every command which can be misunderstood,
will be.
95. There is no such place as a convenient
foxhole.
96. Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last
and don't ever volunteer to do anything.
97. If your positions are firmly set and you are
prepared to take the enemy assault on, he will
bypass you.
98. If your ambush is properly set, the enemy
won't walk into it.
99. If your flank march is going well, the enemy
expects you to outflank him.
100. Density of fire increases proportionally to the
curiousness of the target.
101. Odd objects attract fire - never lurk behind
one.
102. The more stupid the leader is, the more
important missions he is ordered to carry out.
103. The self-importance of a superior is inversely
proportional to his position in the hierarchy (as is
his deviousness and mischievousness).
104. There is always a way, and it usually
doesn't work.
105. Success occurs when no one is looking,
failure occurs when the General is watching.
106. The enemy never monitors your radio
frequency until you broadcast on an unsecured
channel.
107. Whenever you drop your equipment in a fire-
fight, your ammo and grenades always fall the
farthest away, and your canteen always lands at
your feet.
108. As soon as you are served hot chow in the
field, it rains.
109. Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have
nothing to do.
110. The seriousness of a wound (in a fire-fight)
is inversely proportional to the distance to any
form of cover.
111. Walking point = sniper bait.
112. Your bivouac for the night is the spot where
you got tired of marching that day.
113. If only one solution can be found for a field
problem, then it is usually a stupid solution.
114. Radios function perfectly until you need fire
support.
115. What gets you promoted from one rank gets
you killed in the next rank.
116. If orders can be misunderstood they will be.
117. Odd objects attract fire. You are odd.
118. Your mortar barrage will put exactly one
round on the intended target. That round will be a
dud.
119. Mine fields are not neutral.
120. The weight of your equipment is proportional
to the time you have been carrying it.
121. Things that must be together to work can
never be shipped together.
122. If you need an officer in a hurry take a nap.
123. The effective killing radius is greater than
the average soldier can throw it.
124. Professionals are predictable, its the
amateurs that are dangerous.
125. A clean (and dry) set of BDU's is a magnet
for mud and rain.
126. No matter which way you have to march, its
always uphill.
127. The worse the weather, the more you are
required to be out in it.
128. When you have sufficient ammo the enemy
takes 2 weeks to attack. When you are low on
ammo the enemy attacks that night.
129. The quartermaster has only two sizes, too
large and too small.
130. The only time suppressive fire works is when
it is used on abandoned positions.
131. When a front line soldier overhears two
General Staff officers conferring, he has fallen
back too far.
132. Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the
last, and don't ever volunteer to do anything.
133. If at first you don't succeed, then bomb
disposal probably isn't for you.
134. Any ship can be a minesweeper . . . . once.
135. Whenever you lose contact with the enemy,
look behind you.
136. If you find yourself in front of your platoon
they know something you don't.
137. The seriousness of a wound (in a firefight) is
inversely proportional to the distance to any form
of cover.
138. The more stupid the leader is, the more
important missions he is ordered to carry out.
139. When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not
your friend.
140. All or any of the above combined.

Smartsyn: this is where I belong...



Just that the effect these hot peppers have on my anus whenever I visit the restroom can not be quantified.


They always left me singing Haliluya.

More like Hell-iluya

No matter how hard you bleach your Bu.t.t will always remain in its default colour.

In as much as I don't want to argue blindly, I will beg all of you to go and read Galatians 3 verse 1 to the end. The chapter has completely explained the meaning of the law and faith. And if you still believe the op myopic view then it will not be held againts you because the bible is not for the narrowminded thats why we need Men filled with Godly spirit (Real Pastors) to expantiate further. Bless you all.

I think its late coming from me but I understand what the OP is going through. There are two preachers one from Kenya and the other (a woman) I forgot their names, they came to Nigeria with a different kind of mesage. They said that wearing any type of jewelery, make up or trouser by women will lead them to Hell. They succeded in brainwashing many women in many churches in my state. The lady even go further by saying that God has sent her to retrieve all gold, silver, diamond and bronze jewelry from women in the world, which she does at her crusade. My guy your wife is brainwashed and it will take the grace of God to make her see the truth.

I am here to witness a coloured plantain display his ignorance to the public. Anyway, USA is being dominated by the Jews as most of the business men, politicians, scientist, scholars and doctors are/or have Jewish background.

@Op you may be right but its being established that when a person said mb he is refering to databundle not speed or distance or volume. It all depends on the size cos many people are addicted to subscribing from 10 to 500mb. The context matters. Do you say: I drove 50km of distance or I drove 50km.

The op just exposed some of the bad boys antics, which is detrimental to the real players.
But the way some people are responding do alot to downgrade morality.
What do men get by sleeping with numerous women?
why do women feel material things justifies them being defiled.
All I can say is "No Victor No Vanquish" only two imbeciles thinking they achieve a feat.

Vyolet: So i tried to make sense out of this thread as little as 0.5% but i couldn't see any in it. All i keep seeing is fish,fish,fish,do you want to eat fish? Lengthy with no sense..

A willing candidate

Though I find all these funny but I remain Man Utd fan for life. GGMU we will rise again.
#Team Cleverly/Young/Valencia/Nani/Welbeck Ouuuuooootttttt!!!!!!!!!

The op said his own top ten, why are u criticizing his list. Just post ur own jare.
mine will be:
1. Michael Jackson
2. Don Moen
3. Bob Marley
4. Celine Dion
5. 2 Pac
6. Eminem
7. Bongos
8. Lucky Dube
9. Awilo Longonba
10. Don Williams

Others are:
P Square
Terry G
Brandy
MLTR
Westlife
NAS
Phil Colins
Rihanna
Lady Gaga

I wrote two WASSCE and one Neco for my friends, they passed very well (mind you I didn't cheat in all the papers). Should I ask them to return it?

Some of you need to remove your head from those celebrities @ss. Grow up!!!!!!!!!

joshua idibia: Some facts you may not be knowing about INDIANS
1. 38% of doctors in America are INDIANS.
2. 12% of the scientist in America are INDIANS.
3. 28% of the IBM employees in the world are INDIANS.
4. 36% of the NASA employees are INDIANS.
5. 17% of the INTEL employees in the world are INDIANS.
6. 34% of the MICROSOFT employees are INDIANS.
7. Sanskrit is the mother language of all the European languages. WHICH MEANS
SWEDISH TOO.
8. SANSKRIT is most suitable language for computer software reported in Forbes
magazine, 1987.
9. CHESS was invented in INDIA.
10. Creator and founder of HOTMAIL is INDIAN (SABEER BHATIA).
11. Aryabhatta who was from INDIA, invented the number ZERO.
12. INDIANS invented the NUMBER SYSTEM.
13. ALGEBRA was invented in INDIA.
14. CALCULAS and TRIGNOMETRY came from INDIA.
15. The general manager of HEWLETT PACKARD (HP) is INDIAN (RAJIV GUPTA).
16. Creator of the PENTIUM CHIP(90% of the today's Computer runs on it) is
INDIAN (VINOD DAHM).
17. BHUDHYANA first calculated the value of pi (3.14), and he explained the
concept of what is known as the Pythagorean theorem. he discovered this in the
6th century long before the European mathematicians.
18. We have almost 5600 different newspapers and 3500 different magazines with
approximately 120 million readers every day.
19. SUSHRUTA (from india) is the father of SURGERY. 2600 year ago he and health
scientist of his time conducted complicated surgeries like --> artificial limbs,
fractures, urinarystones and even plastic surgery and brain surgery
20. LAXMI MITTAL (steel king) is the richest man in ENGLAND. His house in England
is the most expensive house in the world, more than 70 million pounds.
21. ALBERT EINSTEIN once said:- We own a lot to the INDIANS,who taught us how
to count, without which no worthwhile scientific have been made.
22. INDIA has the THIRD largest army in the world with more than 105 million
men......

All this is the definition of "piece of crap"

OP are u asking or telling us, cos all I can see is ur post all over the thread. Next time just say what u hv in mind and then we will argue with u.

Just write the letter for us to scrutinize and maybe someone may give u an idea to go about it.

gbrown: bros there is no need to rain insults on people, we all seek the truth, i was once a catholic, the worship of mother and son dates back to the kingdom of nenevih, nimrod and the mother semiramis are the originators of this practice they even had priest who acted as intermediaries between the people and the sun god, thier are so many things catholics undulged in that are not in conformity with the bible
*catholics pray to Mary to intercede on thier behalf
*catholics pray to saints to intercede on thier behalf
*the Roman catholic bible contains the apocryphal which is not included in the king James version
*catholics believe in purgatory
my beloved brother, i have moved with seminarians and priest believe me they are very human, i dont want to go into gory details,
bros,whichever way you look at it, it,s wrong to worship or pray to Mary, i,ll suggest you research on d ancient worship of the sun god by the Romans you will see striking similaritie,
finally, my bros, lets look up to Christ the author and finisher of our faith, it,s not every doctrine we accept it must be bible compliant, may the peace of the lord be with you, i guess u wanna know if i honour Mary?yes i do so in my own unique way, i say thank u lord for Mary who was found worthy if not for her mankind would have been lost, bros it ends there, i will never worship or pray to Mary that,s idolatry it,s unscriptural

you made a valid point but u made a mistake saying if not for Mary humanity will hv been doomed. God will chose many other women to do his work.

How many of you are virgins yet u are claiming to follow/worship virgin Mary.

daverebranded: if the apostles hailed Mary in their ministry, I would....if they held stations of the cross, I would, if they used rosary's I would, if Jesus at the end of in time commanded them to always reverence his earthy mum they would and I would too..if in all the doctrines that Paul by the spirit of God did I find the honour of Mary stipulated I would.... if the apostles made images of Mary I would......but since they didn't and since it wasn't in the teachings of Christ....... what can I say let him that lacks understanding ask of the father in the name of Jesus and ye shall recieve

Guy am with you 97%. The downside is that they were deceived for so long, telling them the truth will only infuriate them.

As funny as it may sound but Catholics were seriously misguided. How can u honour a woman who was previously unknown likewise later.She was a gud woman, likewise many in pre-Jesus era. But can u (Catholics) point any significant account of her life, apart from giving birth to our LORD JESUS. "mind u many women were virgins at the time, while some women lived and died virgins. Point to note: She only find favour in God's sight.

Hello Jide, my line was barred from calling since yesterday for no apparent reason. please help.

lekibraky: why oyinbo no sabi lie this once happened to me like 7 years ago i had to tell my GF that my frined used my phone to text his GF and when he told me to help me send it out of love i have for her it was her number that came to my head and my friend confirmed it what we did was to still send the message to my friend's GF so my own girlfriend would be convince it was a mistake.
i am now born again not into the mess anymore thank God

I love ur story, but next tym try using ur punctuation marks, especially the comma.

In my opinion, other players deserve a chance even if it's for training.
Nwankali
Yahaya
Musa
Idowu
These guys were tireless throughout the competition.