1) 16 Missed Calls? You Killed My Battery so
you’re Capable of Killing Me... It's Over!!!

2) You don't even respect me. I'm talking and you
are busy breathing? It's over!

3) I called you and you picked up immediately.
You lack patience. It’s over!!

4) I told u I love my food hot but you refused to warm the ice cream. You don't care about me. It's over!

5) I gave u 2 eggs, to boil one and fry the other.
You fried the one you were supposed to boil and
boiled the one you were supposed to fry. You are
not obedient, It’s over!

6) I messaged you at 11:59pm and you replied
me at 12:00am. why did you reply me the next
day?... its over!!!!

7) I call u DARLING and you called me HONEY.
Indirectly, you’re calling my mother a BEE. No
respect for in- laws, pack your, bags. its over!

Femdeoola:
DSS don turn FBI and VIA ooo.. . Wait so the money in TSA is a virtual money

No, na cash, in N10 notes

Watching Dr Aluko on Channels TV yesterday, I was totally at a loss for words. They brazenly carried out their scripts in that Ekiti elections.

The shameless "convert" even confessed that he fell out with Fayose because Fayose didn't keep his promise of making him Chief of Staff when he became governor. Invariably he only came out with those revelations cos he was scorned. If he had been chief of staff, he would never had come out. In other climes, he would be arrested as soon as he stepped out of the TV station, he has a lot of more explanations to do.

On the flipside, Fayose might need to watch his back, cos am sure many others would have also fallen out with him, I see more people coming out with more revelations. We are watching.

shizzy7:
The wedding gown is beautiful
That cake is awesome...

That's not a cake I called a fruit tree.

God has sanctioned it that Wike would remain Governor, and there is nothing anyone else can do about it.

Congratulations to him, he can now squarely face governance without anymore distractions.

Ok...this one got me laughing real hard.

Someone shared this with me and I feel it's a great piece, please read.

Plunging Naira - before you blame Emefiele look at yourself

It is either I do not understand economics and how exchange rates work or a vast majority of us Nigerians still don’t get how we have wrecked our country with our own curious choices. Just this morning I was listening to the radio and the lady on air went on and on about how she thought CBN governor Godwin Emefiele was incompetent and should be sacked because the naira was now exchanging at 309 or so to the USD. That view pretty much echoes the sentiments expressed by many people I know and it amazes me that there are Nigerians who actually think there is some magic POLICY that can make the naira strong in the near term. If my economics and my understanding of the way the world works are right, then that is as far from the truth as President Obama is a Kenyan.

The simple fact of the matter is that apart from oil that accounts for over 90% of our revenues, we really don’t have much of an economy. We hardly produce anything, we import even toothpicks, so exactly what policy is going to be implemented that will turn Nigeria into a top exporting economy in the near term? Where are our Apples, IBMs, Disneys, GMs, General Electrics, Coca Colas, Empire State buildings, Statues of Liberties, Lockheeds, Citibanks, JP Morgans, ExxonMobils, NBAs, Super Bowls etc? 

Let me bring that closer home. There was a time long ago when Nigeria had a truly strong economy and the naira was one to the dollar - even exchanged for higher than the USD, but that Nigeria is not this Nigeria. Sadly that Nigeria was laid by the British, and this Nigeria (if you don’t believe in the nonsensical imperialist conspiracies like me) - fueled by the DAMAGING Indigenisation Decree, has been the creation of us Nigerians.Back then we had a booming economy. We were either the top, or among the top exporters, of timbre, cocoa, groundnuts, rubber, palm oil, etc, in the world. Nigerians not only holidayed at home in their villages, at Yankari Games Reserve, at Obudu Cattle Ranch, at Oguta Lake, at Ikogosi springs, at Gurara Falls, at Mambilla Platueau, etc, we attracted international tourists who brought in loads of foreign exchange. Even Nigerian schools were foreign exchange earners because they attracted foreign students. We had different car assembly plants - Peugeot, Volkswagen, Anamco etc. Nigerian government officials only bought vehicles assembled in Nigeria for official cars. We had a thriving sports industry. We were not Man United or Chelsea fans, we were Rangers or IICC fans. We had the Nduka Odizors, people made money from sports. We also had companies like Lennards and Bata producing school shoes in their thousands, we had the thriving Nigerian Airways and the Aviation School in the north that produced some of the best pilots in the world. In those days if you were brilliant you were respected much more than the crass money-miss-road contractors of today. Most of the Aje Butters I knew had fathers who were university dons. Back then it meant something to ‘know book’. Our textile industry was alive and well. Just recently I watched a news report on the textile industry in Nigeria on CCTV News. Though the main focus was on the comatose status of the industry, I was stunned by the gigantic Kaduna Textile Mill built in 1957. I could go on and on.

Today however, no thanks to our parents (and we must call them out the way Wole Soyinka did his generation) and many of us (and we should be remembered for failing our children if we continue like this), we have destroyed everything. Today for instance Nigerian football (which comes easy to me obviously) doesn’t appeal to us, we have to fly across thousands of miles to watch ‘our’ clubs play. Every year we collectively burn billions of naira being fans of clubs that give us nothing back, but some ‘entertainment value’ - simple pleasures for which we are ready to destroy the future of our children. Well people, payback time is here. Even with our ta-she-re money we all want to wear designer clothes and carry designer bags, Armani, Givenchy, Louis Vuitton etc. We all want to drive jeeps with American specs, our children must now school overseas and acquire the necessary accents to come back home and bamboozle their ‘bush and crass’ contemporaries that they left behind. Who holidays in Nigeria anymore, is there Disneyland here? No one buys made-in-Nigeria school bags for their children, after all no Superman or Incredible Hulk or Cinderella on them. We are no longer top exporters of anything and the demise of oil means we have zilch... zero. A country of 170m fashion-conscious people has no textile industry. We take delight in showing how our made-in-Switzerland Aso Ebi is different class to everyone else’s. When we help our musicians grow and pay them millions, they repay us by immediately shipping the monies overseas to produce their “i-don-dey-different-level”music videos. It makes no difference that distinctly Zulu dancers are dancing to a Nigerian highlife song. As stars concerned they also wed and holiday overseas to impress us all. All the musicians who acknowledge their Ajegunle roots now speak in a cocktail of strange accents to symbolise how much they have blown their monies overseas.

Were we a more serious people, the highly popular Kingsway Stores of the past would probably have a thousand outlets pan Nigeria today supporting a massive agriculture industry among others, but today we have the likes of SPAR, Shoprite, dominating the retail industry while Kingsway is dead. And we Nigerians make it a special point to shop from the Oyibos who have ‘cleaner shops’, ‘better this and better that’. For our personal pleasure we don’t mind them dominating us in our own backyard and shipping proceeds overseas. 

I could go on and on, but I don tire. Even as you are reading this, stop for a moment and look around you. What you see will probably explain why we are lucky it is not N1000 to the USD yet. And don’t think for a moment that it cannot get there. Just continue to wear your Armani gear and Swiss-made lace, continue to spend your money on Man United, Arsenal, Chelsea and Barca and encourage your children to do same. (My article tomorrow in my Saturday column in This Day is on the Nigerian champions Enyimba FC - Nigeria’s most successful club - not having a sponsor, yet Nigerian brands pay over N600m to Man United and Arsenal for sponsorship to impress us.) Ehhh, no problem, continue to tell me the NPFL is rubbish or the clubs should clean up their act if they want sponsorship, mo gbo. Don’t curtail your interest in choice wines ( we were the number one champagne consumers in the world in 2015), continue to love your American specs, cheer the education ministry for letting schools sink to pitiable levels, don’t fight them to improve our schools, don’t chide them for letting schools drop Nigerian history and embrace British, America and whatever else curricula. Carry on with your love of French wines and Chinese silk, don’t bother about Jamiu Alli when there is Roger Federer. Stock up on your Italian, American, British products which you cannot live without, including the ‘baby soft’ toilet rolls produced only in that small unique village in England - the days are long gone since you were a broke student who used wet newspapers to wipe your butt. Don’t even consider holidaying in Nigeria, it’s too dangnnerous - you have to fulfill your dream of being Nigeria’s Henry Ford. Don’t listen to people like me who have a wardrobe full of only cheap adire that is actually cheaper than just one of your Tom Ford blazers. Please keep dressing in fine silk made in some exotic place so you can be addressed accordingly. Finally keep letting corrupt leaders who have looted your commonwealth and shipped all the monies overseas get away because to attack them does not fit your political narrative. Let us continue with the fine life But don’t forget that there is payback time and Emefiele is not your problem. Time for us all to look in the mirror

It's a call to change our perspective which is a recipe for the great nation we crave for.

Dullards ti take over.


1.5 CGPA...some people's heads are just blocked.

MTN...involved in shady dealings since 10000 BC.

Fire, fire, fire...everytime. This becoming unbecoming. I wonder what is actually going on in the world.

Ayade is one of the few Governors who know what they are doing in government. There are others too who like buying stock fish and kpomo by the roadside. They also know what they are doing in government.

Setaje:
All I know is that this year. You reap what u sew.

Sew, As a tailor ba?

Gloom and doom both don't sound good to me

opalu:
Nigeria does not require DOOM prophecies this year. We need GLOOM prophecies.
So all prophets please take note.

The Tudun Wada Ward executives of the All Progressives Congress in Kaduna State, on Tuesday dissociated themselves from Monday’s suspension of a senator representing Kaduna Central, Shehu Sani, from the party.
Mr. Sani was on Monday suspended for a period of 11 months by the party at Tudun Wada Ward, where he registered.
But the Secretary of the ward, Ahmed Abdulhamid; the Public Relations Officer, Auwal MaiAnguwa and ex-officio member, Aminu Alilan, who purportedly signed the suspension letter, told PREMIUM TIMES their signatures were forged.
“Three people were said to have signed the suspension letter. The third person was a delegate and not an ex-officio as stated in the statement.
“The whole letter is forged and none of the ward executive appended his signature or is even aware of the suspension [until it was made public].
“That is why we called for a meeting today to make our positions known to the world.
“What happened was that we had a meeting yesterday and we did not reach any conclusion. It was on that basis that we requested him (Senator Shehu Sani) to come and explain some of the issues raised against him.


“The party shall investigate the sources of this statement because the three executives mentioned to have signed the statement have denied knowledge of it,” Abbas Mohammed, Chairman of Tudun Wada ward of the APC, said.
The ward secretary and the PRO in a chat with PREMIUM TIMES also denied signing the statement, insisting that their signatures were forged.
A PREMIUM TIMES reporter in Kaduna observed that the state party executives and some party leaders met at the state secretariat of the party on Ali Akilu Road on Tuesday.
Some of the party’s leaders, who spoke to our reporter on the condition of anonymity, also denied prior knowledge of the suspension.
“We are not aware of any suspension of Senator Sani. In fact we are convening a meeting now, and we have also summoned him to come,” one of the state executive council members said.
In the suspension letter circulated on Monday, the party said Mr. Sani’s offences were “violating the rules of engagement of the party, factionalizing the party, and engaging in anti-party activities by criticizing the policies of Governor Nasir El-Rufai.”
An aide to Mr. Sani, Suleiman Ahmed, said it was clear that those who wrote the letter were ignorant of the laws guiding the APC.
He said although it was clear from the letter that the people were out to stop the senator from criticizing “the anti-people policies of the El-Rufai administration”, they would not be able to stop him from expressing his views on what affects the people.
“They are toeing the line of the state secretariat of the party, so our reaction is that those who wrote this letter are ignorant of the party’s constitution and they are dancing to the tune of the state executive of the party and Governor Nasir El-Rufai,” he said.

http://www.premiumtimesng.com/news/headlines/195887-exclusive-our-signatures-forged-to-suspend-shehu-sani-apc-ward-exco.html

People will just be drinking paracetamol over other people's headache.

Deposit Money Banks have commenced a process to stop all customers from using their payment cards, popularly known as Automated Teller Machine cards, for dollar-denominated transactions when they travel abroad with effect from January 1, 2016.

SUNDAY PUNCH’s investigation also revealed the banks would not allow their customers to use naira-denominated ATM cards locally for transactions denominated in forex.

This means bank customers will not be able to use their cards to buy products from foreign e-commerce sites like e-bay and amazon.com in which payments are made in forex.



The development follows the lingering scarcity of foreign exchange, especially the dollar, to settle obligations arising from customers’ use of the ATM cards for forex-denominated transactions.

Already, Standard Chartered Bank has notified its customers that from January 1, 2016, they will not be able to use their naira-denominated ATM cards for transactions that are denominated in foreign currencies, either locally or when they travel abroad.

In a notice to its customers, Standard Chartered said, “This is to notify you that from January 1, 2016, your naira card will no longer be enabled for international use. This is as a result of the limited foreign exchange supply in the financial market.”

Asked how long the suspension of cards from international transactions would be, the spokesperson for Standard Chartered Nigeria, Mrs. Dayo Adurogbo, said, “We cannot give a definite date. It depends on how soon it is available. We will do everything to meet our customers’ demand once it is available.”

Further findings showed that a number of other banks had stopped customers from using their ATM cards abroad but had yet to officially communicate this to them.

Some customers told our correspondent that when they notified their banks of plans to travel and the need to enable their cards work overseas, they were simply informed that the cards could not be enabled for now due to issues relating to forex scarcity.

SUNDAY PUNCH findings showed others banks might issue notices similar to that of Standard Chartered Bank before the end of the year.

“We had some discussions recently and some top bank officials said they would stop customers from using their naira-denominated cards for international transactions due to the serious challenges in getting forex to settle their international partners,” a top bank official, who spoke on condition of anonymity because he was not authorised to speak on the matter, said on Friday.

The current situation means customers travelling abroad for Christmas and New Year may face severe payment challenges, a situation that may mar their shopping plans.

The fall in prices of crude oil, the main earner of foreign exchange for Nigeria, has made the nation’s forex income to reduce drastically, creating dollar scarcity crisis for the Central Bank of Nigeria.

The CBN has been rationing dollar to banks, importers and other forex users as the nation’s foreign exchange reserves continue to deplete, hitting $29.4bn on December 7, 2015.

The PUNCH had exclusively reported on Thursday that banks had cut the amount that their customers could spend using their debit and credit cards abroad by between 70 and 90 per cent. This took effect during the first week of December for the majority of the banks.

Specifically, banks cut customers’ card spending in foreign currencies from the annual $50,000 allowed by the CBN to between $5,000 and $15,000.

According to findings by our correspondent, Ecobank Nigeria Plc has reduced its limit from $50,000 to $5,000, with a maximum of $500 monthly and $100 daily expenditure.

Skye Bank Plc, in a notice to its customers via email, also slashed its international card spending limit from $50,000 to $12,000 annually, a maximum of $1,000 monthly and $100 daily.

Wema Bank Plc also slashed spending on its payment cards from $50,000 to $10,000 annually, $1,000 monthly and $100 daily.

Although other banks have yet to confirm their new international card spending limits, findings by our correspondent revealed that the new limits for most of them ranged from $5,000 to $15,000 annually, and $500 to $1,000 monthly.

http://www.punchng.com/banks-stop-use-of-atm-cards-abroad/

Amusaopeyemi:
Still can't believe he is 45years old.
Men hardly lie about their age, we women need to cultivate that habit too.

so how old are you?

Seems being really beautiful is no longer part of the criteria for winning pageants.

Maybe she's beautiful on the "interior" sha

Eva Caneiro right now...lol

International financial and business news giant, Bloomberg, has expressed serious doubts on the ability of President Muhammad Buhari of Nigeria to turn around Africa’s largest economy and oil producer.
In a scathing analysis of the over six months of Buhari in office, the news outlet concluded that the country was on a dangerous slide with investments at an all-time low, the STOCK MARKET rated as the third-worst performing globally within the period, and growth projected to slow to a 16-year low of 3.3 percent.

In an article, Buhari Bounce Becomes Bust As Nigeria Policies Annoy Investors, the group noted that stocks that soared as investors looked to the former military ruler to reverse decades of economic mismanagement and policy inertia, have all nosed dived and “Now hopes have fizzled in his ability to turn around Africa’s largest economy and oil producer.

“Money that flowed into stocks and bonds in the West African nation, which McKinsey & Co. says could become one of the world’s 20 biggest economies by 2030, is now fleeing as growth prospects diminish along with OIL PRICES. While Buhari, 72, has prioritized stamping out the graft that has plagued Nigeria since independence from Britain in 1960, policy-making appears as uncertain and haphazard as ever.”
Quoting Ayodele Salami, who oversees about $500 million of African equities as chief investment officer of London-based Duet Asset Management Ltd., he said the initial euphoria has turned to disillusionment.

Salami said, “After the initial euphoria, people have become disillusioned. He (Buhari) would probably say that he’s being deliberative and cautious. But we expected more.” Duet’s Africa fund has cut its investments in the country to about 24 percent of the total from 38 percent in the last year.

According to Bloomberg, Buhari the hefty $5.2 billion fine levied on mobile-phone operator MTN Group Ltd. Are desperate moves to shore up government revenue outside plunging OIL PRICES, warning that it could have dire consequences on the country’s economy.

“The penalty imposed on MTN’s Nigeria unit last month for failing to register about 5 million subscribers may be an attempt to plug the hole in government finances, according to Cobus de Hart, an economist at NKC Independent Economists.

“You cannot deny there might be a fiscal element to the massive fine,” he said by phone from Paarl, near Cape Town. “It will make investors a little bit more wary of investing in Nigeria.”

On the stock exchange, it noted that “Nigeria’s benchmark stock index has plunged 22 percent since reaching a year-high on April 2, the day after Buhari was declared the winner of the presidential race against incumbent Goodluck Jonathan. That’s the third-worst performance globally in the period, after the bourses in Ukraine and Egypt. The index advanced 12.5 percent in the two days after Jonathan conceded.”

It further observed that an even bigger concern for many investors is the authorities’ naira policy. The Central Bank of Nigeria, with Buhari’s backing, has burned through $4.3 billion of reserves this year and choked off supply of foreign exchange to banks and their customers to defend the naira, even as major OIL EXPORTERS such as Russia and Colombia have let their currencies slide. The restrictions prompted JPMorgan Chase & Co. to remove Nigeria from its local-currency emerging MARKET bond indexes, tracked by more than $200 billion of funds, in September, triggering a selloff in the nations’ assets.

While the naira has been all but fixed at about 198 to 199 per dollar since March, forward prices suggest it will drop by almost one-fifth, to 243.5, in a year.

“The number-one issue is the exchange rate,” Andrew Howell, a Citigroup Inc. frontier markets strategist, said from Lagos. ”Access to foreign exchange is becoming a widespread problem.”

Nigerian Breweries Plc, the nation’s biggest brewer that’s controlled by Heineken NV, said it takes two weeks to obtain dollars to pay for its imports, twice as long as it required a few months ago. Nestle SA’s Nigerian unit has had to wait six weeks for dollars, according to Renaissance Capital Ltd. analysts.

Jan Dehn, head of research at Ashmore Group Plc, which oversees almost $60 billion of emerging market assets, remains unconvinced that Buhari is up to the job. The fund manager sold all its Nigerian government debt in the past year.

“So far the Buhari administration has done all the wrong things,” Dehn said by phone from London. “Not only has he been incredibly slow in taking any action, when he finally has taken action on the economic front it’s been diametrically opposed to sensible policy. That is a major disappointment given expectations prior to his election.”

Source: http://thewhistler.ng/story/bloomberg-writes-off-buhari-he-has-no-capacity-to-run-nigeria?utm_source=&utm_medium=facebook#.VllgwR-TcAs.facebook

Shoro Niyen

Segadem:
That's is the source of their income, I think the okada was faulty ,op if na u be the owner of that okada will u abandon it

Hmmm...Abubakar Audu. When you are not meant to have something again. If only w can be clairvoyant, some of the things we pursue would be very unnecessary

BIAFRA AWAITS U....SAFE JOURNEY

ichidodo:
He's just a lawyer... what does this horribly inept and clueless square peg know about electronics, electricity and concrete bridges?... This warped phenomenon is a dumb first from President dulladeen from Daura village

CircleOfWilis:
BVN=666=Mark of the beast
:-

Awon werey.

I hope Fayose isn't just about giving fish to the hungry. He should also be about teaching ém how to fish. #stomachinfrastructure can only go so far.

These Mexicans have wasted so many chances sha..like 50 chances.

Nigeria 4:2 Mexico. Goallllllll Osimhen scores his 9th goal of the tournament.

Penalty for naija.

How did Osimhen miss dat? Damnn

Upright

Nigeria 3:2 Mexico. Goallllllll. We back in front.

Nigeria 2:2 Mexico. Dude just scored d goal of the tournament. He dribbled past 5 Nigerian players.