Kobojunkie:

I didn't know His plans as a child but I had ideas.


Most of these kids were themselves raised in one religious home or another. So where many of their parents before them. Isn't that the recipe for raising good children?

My kids? ROFLMAO!!!

where did you get the statistics from? It is actually rare to see a child that was raised in a godly home turn out poorly, even when you see them, they are usually the "black sheep" amongst their siblings and they still have that reverence for God and repent in their later years

bukatyne:


Just curious

Who are the people mocking this man as a sissy on the streets?

we wanted to do a meeting and the leader refused to call him,saying he would rather call his wife because she is the head of the home because she feeds him

crackland:

Lmao..you have completely turned facts on its head just to make a flawed point.

Name one Nigerian woman belonging to the economic upper class who identifies and vocalizes as a feminist.

Feminism in Nigeria is the tonic for women who grew up in poor/less than average homes.
A woman who from childhood had always been exposed to the best education, the best opportunities, unlimited funds from daddy/mummy, these are the ones that never needed feminism to be anything - they already had access to the things women like you think feminism will achieve for you.

While you're right that a woman from the upper class will not be seeking desperately to marry a man who will increase her financial status, she still won't marry down.
Her ideal man will be from the same circle, and this also proves that nothing has changed.

If women really think change has come, they would marry men with less financial weight regardless of their status... because from the ages, it's always been men marrying down.

The only change women want is on the part of men, not themselves...and that will not work.
It's either all of us remain primitive, or all of us become modern.

Firstly, many rich women are not vocal because of security issues in the country. Piping low is key to enjoying a long life as a rich woman here. I have interacted with a good number of them and they share feministic views. Also,the major reason most women don't marry down is because most men tend to have esteem issues because their wives are richer. Although i have met two exceptional cases, one the man still rides his cab till date in the morning, goes to his state ministry office, and later in the evening rides his cab, while his wife is a super rich career woman driving a venza, yet they are very happy both in and out. the other, the wife is a successful lawyer, very humble and nice, while the hubby works closely with her,helps in the house with the kids if she has to travel, infact they are so close i initially thought they were both lawyers. Now, the man is been mocked in the street for being a "sissy man". A woman cannot be humble enough for a typical nigerian man with esteem issues. Even if you are lucky enough to get a man with a good esteem, his poor family and friends will keep taunting him for been a "sissy" till he changes. That's why women love to marry their class and above.

crackland:

So what is responsible for all that? Nature or society?


With all the talk about how times have changed, are Nigerian women really ready to change the above narrative, or should the change ONLY happen on the man's part?

Are Nigerian women really ready to stop waiting for men to deliver them by increasing their financial status? I don't think so...
Reality does not show it.

Nothing changed, it only evolved.

its still society. You are more likely to see women ready to change the narrative amongst the upper class members of the nigerian society, but you the middle class and lower class ehn, i have personally met women who told me who feminism epp, they prefer the present state of things where they wait for a man to bring money to their feet.

Before the world war 1, it was unheard of in europe that a woman is working. The women then only do domestic chores. Then, the war came and most of the men were taken to battle, lo and behold women came out working because they could not afford to feed themselves and their kids staying at home doing nothing. The men came back and were surprised to see women working. God forbid, but if something similar happens in Nigeria, you will be shocked to see women moving cranes, forming vigilantes and doing things only men do. Why? because they don't do those things just because we were brought up believing we are not meant to suffer, just be beautiful and enjoy yourself while sufferhead men will hustle and bring their money to your feet. And most importantly, many women here lack ambition, they are too laid back, that is why they don't bother challenging the status quo. in the university, you will see a class of 50 females and 3 boys, yet a boy is the courserep because none of the girls want to use the precious time for gossip to be pursuing lectures, a church department with 8 girls and 2 boys, yet the a boy will be the leader and so on. It is just the societal expectations for the guy to do the dirty work and bring his hard labour to the feet of the low ambitious , pretty female. How many rich guys do you see marrying a construction worker? how many oil company workers will want to marry a crane operator? but, you will see them running after models and beauty queens and giving them the la vida loca life. So younger ladies see this things and aim to be the lazy slay queen who will do nothing yet live a better life than the average hardworking woman. And, over time it becomes a culture

crackland:

Lol, I didn't even want to deal with that army example that was brought up earlier.

This is a discussion I've had with someone - a cousin, Major in the Nigerian Army who is stationed in the northern theatre, right at the epicenter of Boko Haram territory.

There are no women there, SIMPLE - it's not for argument.

That women are recruited into the army does not mean they are sent into battle and like you rightly pointed out, they are mostly stationed at camps and tasked with handling intel. Others are used to interrogate and thoroughly search females who have been captured.
The ones who have been trained in aerial surveillance will be flying above (still with a male co-pilot).


When it comes down to fighting at the front in any warzone (anywhere in the world) where soldiers spend weeks at a stretch in harsh conditions, they don't want to take a woman who may start seeing her period and then become deadweight to members of her team. Not to mention that even without that, women are just not as strong, fast, or have the stamina to match up with the men in such situations.
This is a weak-link no soldier wants to gamble on when you're faced between life and death.

Even well-trained dogs see more action on the battlefield than female soldiers.

And that is just one occupation, there are countless more like it.

Even you sef bruv, you're a sailor right... how many women dey your line of work?
As a crane operator, I've only ever met one female operator (she's not even Nigerian) and this is despite the fact that all we need to do to operate these giant machines, is move a few levers and press buttons.

You are still saying the same thing with the op. that women are not in the battle front in nigeria dosen't mean it is so over the world. Remember, africa used to have the Dahomey female warriors,Queen Amina, Yaa Asantewa and many women who reached the frontline in battles. But, now, the average nigerian female believes she has no business there because that is what she was brought up believing. I am female and i hate to say this 80% of young female nigerians are not ambitious. They are very comfortable chatting on twitter,gossiping on blogs,looking beautiful and looking for the best kayanmata, attraction oil and other modified jazz to land them a good catch in the market. Even when they want to work they are very comfortable with competing with their fellow females by selling bags, shoes, hair,cream etc. This is because we grew up believing it is the work of men to hustle and be wealthy while it is our duty to "leech" on a wealthy man. We grew up watching cinderella and sleeping beauty where a prince must save you else you die. Even the few smart ones that enroll themselves in military are not interested in moving up the ranks and contributing seriously to the force, they rather stay gossiping and preparing food. Take a look at the movies we produce especially on africa magic epic, 90% of the storyline includes a poor village orphan girl will be suffering till she meets a rich man from the city that will marry her and change her life. the question is, why can't the poor orphan girl, write jamb, get a scholarship, get a good job or start a profitable business and take her damn self out of poverty? why must she wait for the rich prince?

what the bible is trying to say is put the love of God over the love of money. E.g if you are told to sleep with someone or swear at a shrine before you will be awarded a $30million contract, would you refuse the opportunity to become rich because you love your God? The bible has no problem with riches.Solomon was the richest in his time, Job was the richest too. Jabez,David, Lydia too were rich. Even Jesus had rich friends such as Nichodemus and Joseph of Arimathea. In the new testament, there were records of rich people who donated money to help the poor. What the bible is against is rich people who commit sin to make money and think by tithing or bringing it to church they will cover up their sins and go to heaven. E.g a typical nigerian politician that will steal money meant for his poor constituents and use part of it to build a church

na wa o. see the kind of structures people were building more than 1000yrs ago when our ancestors were still thinking of how to marry more wives, kill twins and update to the latest juju. las las the human mind can do wonders if put to good use.

Oluromantic:
Good piece. But how many African parents are educated enough to understand psychology. How many of them are even exposed enough to be sensitive to the psychic effect of their child upbringing. Maybe some Lagos based educated parents sha, cus in the village, psychology is not understood. Rather they believe a child is the way he/she is cuz that's how his destiny from God is, from birth especially because a cele prophet prophesied that rain and sun will shine on the day he was born, that's why he's a calm or gentle type or that's why he has action like lion.

According to UNESCO 65% of Nigeria population are illiterates, that's why feminism can't gain grounds in Nigeria too. Until close to 90% of the masses are educated, the the psychology of parenting and feminism will be widely understood. Knowledge can't thrive in darkness. The mind has to be enlightened before it thrives. Nigerians are in educative darkness.

illiteracy has to do with the inability to read and write and i won't count it as the major challenge here. The major challenge is lack of awareness because even the so called educated people still do the same to their kids. Movie producers should produce movies that shed light on these issues rather than those boyfriend,girlfriend,maiden,prince,rich,poor endless story lines they keep acting. musicians ought to sing about these things instead of the gibberish they produce. What will it take a politician to forgo buying a luxury car and use the money to produce a radio jingle or posters in his local language for his community people to learn? What will it take lalasticlala to push something this enlightening to front page?

Eulalia:
Nice one.
Thanks.

u are welcome

IceLip:
GOOD, buh why written 5 and not 6 ??

it was a typo.thanks for the correction.

Do you know why many adults today are suffering from low esteem? It is because of their upbringing. This has affected their life choices in careers, marriage and even their faith, as they can be easily swayed away from the Godly life they were raised with to living a sinful life. Read on to learn helpful tips you can use to raise your little ones to be a Godly and confident individual.

1 Do not body-shame or insult your kids.
Don't call your kids "dudu", "blacky" ,"hummer head" ,"wowo","blockhead" ,"big-mouth" ,"lekpa", "orobo-kiti", "ugly child", "Anya 4:30", "hammer head of horror" "idiot" "fool" "goat" "slowpoke"etc. If you are doing these already please stop it ASAP. Ha! Many ladies who are bleaching today are doing so because their parents used to mockingly call them blacky. Were you the one that created your child?, did she create herself? so why are you insulting her. These types of insults will remain in the minds of your kids all through their lives. That your daughter that you constantly call wowo will at the age of 14 have a toaster that will call her beautiful. Do you know what she will do? she will leave your advice and run into his hands just because no one calls her beautiful at home. Even as a joke, never ridicle your kids and caution whoever tries to do that.

2. Always call them by sweet names
Always call your kids beautiful, miss world, mr handsome etc. Proclaim God's blessings on them by calling them child of favour, child of grace, blessed child,prosperity is your name, love, apple of God's eyes, 'uwa-oma', peaceful child, my joy, my firstfruit, future president get my phone from the room etc. You can even customize these names in your local dialect for your kids. Personally, i don't call my kids endurance, perseverance and patience, biko don't ask me why

3. Give them positive proclaimations to say daily.
Say these statements with your kids daily at the end of their morning prayers. You can spice it up by jumping, hitting your chests, or shouting hurray to make them gingered.
I am beautifully and wonderfully made (x3)
I can do all things through Christ that strenghtens me (x3)
I am blessed, I am favoured and I am a child of grace (x3)
I am strong, i am beautiful, I am great, I can do anything (x3)
My protector is awake. The protector of (INSERT NAME e.g ugo) never doses or sleep (x3)

4. Don't flog or scold your kids excessively
Yes, the bible says spare the rod and spoil your child, but just as with all things, flogging or scolding your child excessively is very detrimental to their esteem. It leads to two things, either the child stops getting scared of been flogged or scolded or the child's spirit gets broken. He becomes a dummy, has no say of his own. He won't be able to speak out for his rights when been maltreated as an adult. On the either end, they can become narcisstic, beating up their spouses because they believe that is the only way to correct someone. Your kids are individuals with their own minds just like you. Learn to take them by your side and ask why they acted in a bad manner. Listen to their opinion and their point of view and correct accordingly. If you must spank use a cane and beat on their palms or buttocks. Please don't use your hands,belt,pepper,iron to slap or inflict bodily marks on them.

5. Treat your kids equally
Always show your kids that you love them equally whether or not it is true. Not doing so can make them grow up feeling like they are not good enough. Don't show one kid more love or buy better gifts than the rest. This act can breed sibling rivalry that will last even after you are gone.

6. Preach and practice Godly values with them
Teach your kids Godly values like love, peace, humility, forgiveness and how God hates envy, jealousy, lies etc. You can tell the first to forfeit his meat for the last, if he does without hesitation reward him with two meats. Tell the last to hug and forgive the elder sibling who spanked her. These values last for a lifetime. Remember to practice what you preach. You can't be beating your wife and be teaching your kids about love.

Lastly, endeavor to pray for them always. It is only God that can perfect our efforts. Please post some cute names and useful tips others can learn from in this thread.

Indispensable85:
There's no classification of sin. Sin na sin. No big or small sin.

jimmyolasun charley4tex konji3368 femi4 ikennafabian651 jaspernubi Read 1 John 5:16-17 “If you see any brother or sister commit a sin that does not lead to death, you should pray and God will give them life. I refer to those whose sin does not lead to death. There is a sin that leads to death. I am not saying that you should pray about that. All wrongdoing is sin, and there is sin that does not lead to death.”
A Sin is a sin but they have different effect on the person that committed it and different punishment. Just like a crime is a crime but they have different punishment in the law. if you steal a goat you can send 6 months in prison, if you steal 10 million you can spend 3 years but if you kill someone you will be hanged. All crime na crime but the punishment no be the same. Same way, if you have two friends, you caught one stealing your phone and you caught the other trying to poison your food, which will hurt you more? the two will hurt you more but you will fight and hate the one that tried to kill you more than the other. Matthew 18: 5-8 Jesus describes how terrible the punishment will be for people that lead children astray. Mark 14:21 Jesus narrates how terrible the punishment will be for the person that will betray him (Judas). For more bible reference read proverbs 6:16-19.

most people who post their hubby's pictures all over the net with those super long posts are sad in their marriages and seek some form of validation. I don't post my hubby and kids pictures online, not even on whatsapp because i'm too happy to do so and the world out there is bad

this is why i laugh when i hear some delusional igbo men bragging that man is polygamous in nature. Please if you care about the integrity of your lineage, marry just one good woman and have your kids for her and train your kids to be a success. Stay away from side chicks, sugar girl, second wife, strange women etc. Ojukwu was a known philanderer, now see his family. It never ends well. It might work for an hausa man but never for an igbo man

WorldklazzBae:


You see eehhnnn God works in mysterious ways. I love that I know and Love God and I will for the rest of my life

my sister, there is nothing better than knowing or loving God. Even if things don't work out as you planned on earth, the assurance of been with Jesus our Lord for eternity is the best feeling ever

Early this year, i had a dream that i had a terrible sickness that finished my husband's money and made him go begging. Later on, i started having serious abdominal pain and i was planning on seeing a doctor. A spirit told me to go to a church deliverance i have never been to. I decided to go because i wanted to ask God to make me a strong christian not even because of the sickness. On reaching there, the pastor touched me and i started rolling, like play like play he commanded the spirit of sickness that was in me to leave. He placed his hands on my tummy and my tummy became so hot and painful. I started rolling again till i fell down and felt something left me. Since then, i have never felt any pain or fallen ill till this moment. I am yet to give my testimony in their church, but i will ensure i do it.

Hi, nlanders, I desperately need to read this ebook Small business big money by Akin Alabi. I will appreciate it if anyone is kind enough to send it to my mail. Thanks

dawnomike:

No problem about that... I made profits overall

I have researched Online and it seems to be like forex. but I really do not understand it yet

dawnomike:
Volatility trading...

thanks.. what is the least amount I can invest in this

Hi. I'm a nursing mum of one and I intend starting an online business as that will enable me nurse my baby better than a physical business. I'm a good writer though a lazy one too, but a good pay will surely motivate me. I need something that I can be sure of 50k per month. please roll in your suggestions. Thanks.

lonelydora:


The increase rate of divorce in Africa is caused by women trying to imitate white women where marriage is concerned.
They forgot that those white ladies are backed by law. But here in Africa, traditionally it's a taboo to move out of your husband's house. Family, Friends, Society immediately turn against you once you are divorced. You have to live with the stigma

.my dear Africa is a continent and not one tiny village, we are even trying in Nigeria, if you go to kenya and southAfrica you will be shocked at the number of single and divorced parents. At the end of the day you only get to live once, it is better for you to be divorced with peace of mind than to be married with a partner that makes you sad. What people will say should not be a factor to your happiness, learn the subtle art of not giving a damn. this is 2019 and more and more women and even men are realizing that no primitive tradition should decide how happy they will be in this one life on earth. Besides so many divorcees are remarrying on a regular so I don't understand the stigma you are talking about.

I still remember the day I wrote waec maths, they assembled all of us on the ground come flog us better flog that day because some guys bent the school fans na so we enter hall barefooted like criminals or is it when if you come late you will use your knees to crawl to the Assembly ground do late comers assembly then they will pour water on the floor to make it while you "swim" back to your classroom. Omo, the flogging no be here oo, my class was directly above the commandant so na everyday we dey chop cane by the time we reach Ss2 cane no come dey fear me again. All in all it made me a better person but I noticed most of their students don't exactly dream big because of their environment las las army recruit, you barely hear doctor, I.T consultant etc although this is based on my own observation of my set. So I will strive to send my kids to schools like Loyola Jesuit where you see kids that are aspiring to school abroad for a start

burnt shops

houses

Angry Youths Destroy Abia State Community Over Land Dispute(photos)

I happened to be in Ozarike autonomous community, Umunneochie LGA in Abia state yesterday evening for an occasion, then i had series of sporadic gunshots and people running for their lives, it was later i enquired and learnt that is was the youths from the neighbouring village Amalato that invaded and destroyed people's properties over communal land. Peoples shops were burnt, bikes and vehicles were destroyed. A member of the royal family was shot on both legs but later taken to the hospital before I could take pictures. I still thank God i was in a fenced building and not outside.

Please no amount of land is worth a human life, let us learn to live in peace and take such matters to court where it will be properly addressed.
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