₦airaland Forum

cutecommend:
I am currently not interested in keeping friends, but I have good relationships with several people.

I'm an uncertified loner by choice. Thus I offer stoic friendship from a distance. People don't befriend me, I befriend them.

MarinatoDakster:
I’ve been noticing my son struggles with coordination - even simple tasks like tying shoes or using cutlery. Someone mentioned dyspraxia, but I don’t know how to tell if that’s it.

How old is your child?

Galinton:
So one day, I finally thought of processing my thought and guest what? I ended up with a list, list of things I have dreamt of doing, which I love doing but never gave them a short just because my mind is so much consumed with the intrusive thought.

Focus on your haves instead of have nots

Imbue the character of gratitude

Be contented with what you have, work hard nonetheless.

Find out what triggers you and avoid it.

Have a happy place or thing. For instance, mine is prayer, social media and movies. Thus when I start to feel blue, I switch to them

Finally and most importantly, understand that there are no timelines in life. You don't need to give yourself ultimatum. Your current reality is someone's prayer point. So be grateful for your little baby steps and dont beat yourself up when life gives you lemons over and over again. Make lemonades over and over and over ..... and over again.

Nobody has it all figured out.

Tjra:
Funny enough, I withdrew my investment last week for an ongoing project.

Piggyvest can't go down. It must truly be a glitch.

If it truly does, then it's gonna make people lose the trust all the Fintechs have been able to earn in last 5 years.

I like to think that I am quite literate when it comes to these fintechs, but I still have my doubts and reservations about Piggyvest and its associates. I just wish people can be more cautious.

Anguldi:
Do you mean traditional wedding is illegal?

I used the word, "legality", to describe court union because it is the only union that offers you a formal recognition of marriage (marriage certificate) that is internationally recognised. This is in no way a smear campaign for traditional marriages. As a matter of fact, you cannot be legally married in a court without satisfying all traditional rites.

jiz:
God help Nigeria and give us visionary leadership that prevents disaster with good policies

May God also bless we, Nigerians, with the wisdom to desist fro dumping refuse inside drainage channels and building houses along water flow channels.

BeardedMeat:
Op didn't say you should give advice Juliet, he said tell us your experiences that others may learn.

Now, can you tell us your experiences or you want to send it to my DM?

I spelt these out in codes. I expect you to read between the lines to figure out the experience(s). Cheers!

xcolanto:
Indeed words are powerful and hold the key of life and death. What are you speaking concerning that situation, your kids, job, success and struggles? What you say is what you get if you believe it when you say it. "For we are snared or freed by the words of our mouth".

People do not understand that our words and thoughts are vibrations. And negative vibrations travel and manifest faster. This principle is the bedrock of the law of attraction and even faith. Let's learn to focus our thought and words positively.

Never date a "broken man". Young lady, you are not a mechanic. If his parents couldn't fix him, what makes you think you could? (Same advise can apply to dating a broken lady too.


If he cheats once, leave and dont look back. They don't change. Same can be applied to women too


Be entangled with an emotionally intelligent man, else you would be frustrated into madness.


Do not form friendship or sisterhood/brotherhood at work. Do your job and go home.

Do well what is worth doing. Our deeds have a way of coming back to us.

Do not befriend people below your intellectual and emotional level, else you would be emptied. And completely drained out.

Nna2025:
Hello Nairalanders, I know we are very sensitive to cheating so I ask for forgiveness.

I had a fling with a girl I have known for sometime now, I used CD but at some point, I used my finger. I started reading about Hiv and the possiblity of contracting it through fingering. Although my readings says % is very low provided there is no fresh injury, however I opted for PEP to calm my nerves. ( Pep is a drug used, when you suspect an exposure to HIV, remember you have 36hours to take it or else it won't work)

I tore off the pack, hid it in something and kept it in my bag. My wife for whatever reason searched my bag, saw it googled it and came back shouting and screaming since last night. My only comment to her is let's go for hiv test And that the drug was for my asthma, I know she wants to take it somewhere for verification.

My only fear now is if I disclose the reason for taking PEP, then my marriage is in danger.


Anything I can do to salvage this situation, I do not have time. Please my people

Why really do men cheat? You saw this woman, liked her enough to marry her... you knew what you stood to lose peradventure you are caught cheating... why?

If you saw PEP or PREP in your wife's possession, would you forgive her? The least you could do to a woman loyal and true to you is not to give her these necessary heartaches.


From your comment, all you seemed bothered about is your wife forgiving you, possibly because her unforgiveness would cost you so much. Do you take time to think of how your wife would feel before cheating?


There is nothing you can do to salvage the situation. Whatever decision your wife takes would be justifiable. Just pray she tows the path of forgiveness. I hope this serves as a lesson and you turn a new leaf.

Men who are open to cheating should not marry. Same goes for women. We cannot keep eating our cake and having it and expect the society to be a better place.

Love800:
Is it by force you must do traditional or court wedding!
Just see her parents. And later after 10yrs, both of you can wed!

Unless you want to be a semi in-law, it's best to do the traditional wedding. The court wedding is also necessary as it provides a legality to the union
Why wait for 10 years when you can have something simple now?

Fxwarrior:
Op can opt for western style of marriage with few in attendance more like church blessing. Low budget. He still gets to have his marriage certificate.

Just refreshment after wedding in takeaway packs for the few gathered. No need for reception.

This is also a good idea.

Cristlaw:
Good day Nairaland.

I will be brief.
I love this lady and I believe she loves me too because she is my dream woman.
we plan to get married by early next year, but the problem here is that my mom want me to hold on with the wedding because she feels I'm not buoyant enough for marriage.
My finance promise to support though.

By this year December, I should have saved 1.5M from my pocket and I believe family and friends will support as my total budget for the wedding is 2M.

Although I didn't tell her about my savings yet.
I don't want to enter a marriage without my parents support. Just few months left to new year and I'm so confused right now.

What should I do guys?

Go on with your plans, but do a lowkey ceremony. Let your inlaws be considerate with the list. Satisfy all traditional rites and proceed to do a court weeding. The traditional wedding should be a parlour event with only those who matter in attendance. After that opt for court wedding instead of church wedding.

Emeskhalifa:
What are the alternatives pls?

You could opt for our locally made cereals (Tom brown), Rice/groundnut Pudding (what Northerners call Kunun gyeda) and so on. All it takes is figuring out what appeals to your palates and can easily be sought for.

Trymeee:
You're very correct in the bulk buying. But a man with 4 kids and a wife might think twice before coughing out the money for bulk buying, that's even if he can put such punt together without been tempted to touch. I do bulk buying and i stay in Ibadan. With even less than a million I stock up the house even with drinks and other edibles. I just have learnt to stay off lounges and money syphoning places.

I understand your perspective, but bulk buying still remains the best. Just make sure your partner is in on it and in tune with the reality on ground and you'd be good.

Sirmwill:
The Actual result is actually useless 😔

I hope and pray he finds healing to his broken heart and solace in this difficult time of sorrow

I believe it is a drive towards finding closure and subsequently suing the exam body. Both actions are well in order. Only God knows how long this sham of results tampering has been going on.

Quarterpast:
So sad He didn't keep to his promise of refunding my rent. I had even shared the testimony in church, prayed about it. Even got loans hoping to repay as soon as he sends it, but since then, he no longer replies my mails. What do people gain in disappointing others?
Why promise what u can't fulfill?

Sorry about your plight, but don't take it personal. It's possible that God has other plans for you. This person was a blessing to over 50 people so I don't think he disappointed you on purpose. Take it as the will of God.

Familymatterss:
I moved into a new apartment early last year, and I've enjoyed the change of scenery.

There's this single lady in the compound, likely to be in her late 20s, she is beautiful and attractive. I'm very much interested in her, but I'm concerned about being rejected and the awkwardness of seeing her regularly if she turns me down. I also worry about how it might affect our interactions with other neighbors if she were to share that I approached her with other neighbors.

Should I take the risk and ask her out, or should I respect the boundaries of our neighborly relationship? If you think I should pursue her, what's the best way to approach her, considering I have her contact from our WhatsApp group?

There's nothing wrong in shooting your shot. Set the ball rolling by seeking friendship and afterwards, let her know your intention.

Love800:
How can one cure dandruff?

Anytime i go to the salon to cut my hair, white stuffs is seen flying everywhere, like powder being blown by breeze!
Inside the following week after the barbing, after a while when through with my bath, my head will be shinning all white with dry white flakes falling from my head. Maybe when my hair is now fully grown back, nobody notices the white stuff again. After sometime when i visit the salon again for an hair-cut, the problem continues again!

NOTE: i have tried many solutions but no one has been effective! How do i get it off my hair/head?


*File photo for illustration

Seborrhicbdermatitis on scalf

Love800:
What do you mean by "First do not parboil your rice. Just wash and drain?"

Also, what is the meaning of the bolded?

Bottom-to-top is just a theoretical explanation on how to stir your rice while steam cooking so it can cook evenly. When your rice is steam-cooking, you need to move it around. Thus, lift the rice at the bottom up to the top with your spoon so those originally at the top can move to the bottom.

Love800:
What do you mean by "First do not parboil your rice. Just wash and drain?"

Also, what is the meaning of the bolded?

The principle of not parboiling the rice intended for jollof rice is borne outbofnthe fact that the rice, when mixed with the stew base, first need to cook in its juices and subsequently steam cook. Parboiling the rice may take away the steam-cooking phase which is what gives that signature party jollof taste.

fineboynl:
which part of the north? Some north yam is not that sweet not good for pounded yam

The Yams from Niger are good for poinded yam...same as those from Benue.

fineboynl:
I was just wondering if Nigerians are still eating pounded yam?

The price of yam will just weak you.

Normal size 9k-10k i just weak.

Yams are cheaper in the North. It would have been a great idea to have someone purchase them for you from here and waybill it to your end, but the cost of waybill is a setback. Over here, 5 tubers retail for 7 to 9k.

Agbegbaorogboye:
He's not lying
Ask around the price of big bull or mama gold rice
Your wife probably sells lower quality rice like short grain or not well dried

Thanks for clearing him. Some people like arguing blindly. Rice comes in grades. Mango Rice, my choice and Co are high grade rice..

wengerman:
most diseases of animal is not zoonotic (can be passed from one specie to another). Pig doesn't have newcastle and other diseases of fowl. A good example is asf that ravages pigs and is incurable for pigs. Human being can eat infected animals and won't contact I but if another pig eat infected animal ,it is gone.

Thanks for the clarity, but I beg to disagree.

EvergreenDiarie:
My friend told me that he attended a workshop back then and one of the things that was thought was using chicken poo which was named "black gold" to make fish feed.

I want to know, has anyone here successfully used such, I am just curious to know if such thing works or is there anyone here who provides such training.

This doesn't sound right. Chicken excreta cannot be food, best case is manure. Doing this would mean transferring diseases to the fish and subsequently, humans.

advanceDNA:
Pele...you don wake up

I've realized for a while now that love or lust or wateva pple feel or call it is not needed in marriage........the side that has less of this so called love or lust has the highest leverage..

Just marry with your two eyes open so that you can see bu!!sh!t from miles away, carry a rational mind to be fair when needed, and tuck ur heart away in hidden vault to prevent anybody from robbïng you of your peace so u can be ruthless when needed

Good as always... Talking about your submission. Love is overrated. Marriage is partnership. Find someone whose qualities syncs with yours. One whose strength can rub off on you positively and vice versa.

ouzo1:
see marriage and wedding na two different things.
most of u prepare for weddings not marriage,marriage takes alot to work.
u need to be ready mentally and emotionally but these days na weak ass Men dey everywhere and whining Women.

There simply has been a paradigm shift. In those days, intending couples leave no stone unturned in knowing and mastering themselves. Couples these days hardly focus on that. Having a successful marriage goes beyond the chemistry you feel for the other person. Intending couples must invest much more in "knowing themselves".

Another descripancy is the fact that red flags are downplayed. Unlike the Israelites who were promised that they shall not see the Egyptians in the promise land, marriage works differently because the Egyptians (red flags) will surely be there. Thus, if you cannot stand a certain trait and the other person is not willing to compromise mid-way or fully, it's best to detach.

Finally, it's no surprise that the devil is attacking marriages. This is based on the belief that separation breeds dysfunctional children (in most cases) and these are easy targets for his antics.

Okeytech:
I have a rule that whoever you are, even if i offended you previously and i later call you(perhaps to apologize) then you pick and start waiting for me to say hello first, I swear with my life, i'll never call you again because i see that as the height of disrespect.

Your concern is valid, but what if the person is being quiet because he or she understands this rule? You would end up losing friendships over something as trivial as this.

immortalcrown:
Fellow Nairalanders, good day to you all.

Please, is it right for someone to pick a call from a known (saved) contact and wait for the caller to be the first to speak? As in, the receiver will pick the call but will not speak until he or she hears "Hello" or anything from the caller.

Someone will pick your call, wait for some seconds and starts speaking by scolding you because you were not the first to say, "Hello". And there was no form of dispute before the call. I sincerely need communication experts to educate me on this issue.

I posted this topic on my WhatsApp status and have gotten some responses which I have quoted in the comment section.

"Hello" is actually a code in telephone communication. It isn't just about breaking the ice, but making your caller know that you are ready to talk. In actual sense, the receiver is expected to break the ice. This serves as a confirmation of call receipt and readiness to talk.


For instance, if you are in a noisy environment and an important call comes in, you may not want to leave the noisy environment completely before picking because the call might go off. Thus, you may pick and continue walking and once the environment is sane enough, you say "hello".