₦airaland Forum

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DevilhimseIf:
I love catholic church the only true and orthodox religion.

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Devil himself is the father of lies.

jekks:
why is it so difficult for me to find a wife?

Good women are all around you, you just have to shine your eyes.

Hahahaha

We need statistics abeg.

Africans and Religion.

EagleSquare1:
Seeing your name ‘Devilhimself’ I thought a terrorist should be a delight to you. Why the beef nah?

Thunder fire Devil himself.

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DevilhimseIf:
as far as Buhari remains a terrorist.

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You're worse than Buhari.

Nonsense!

Brugo:
Exactly. They just can’t live at peace with their hosts. Always trying to cheat people who accommodate them.

Don't mind them, it's their way.

Chukwurah003:
Ipobs causing trouble all over the world. Chai! I am thoroughly ashamed!

God punish Devil himself.

MrBrownJay1:
Of course infidelity can be forgiven [s]BY LOW SELF ESTEEM PEOPLE.... desperate to stay married at ANY cost,[/s] in order to keep the charade of "Mrs happily married somebody"

So they have low self esteem because they choose to forgive their spouses' infidelity. Look here, this world is not a difficult place to live but we humans do all to complicate things. What's the big deal in forgiving your unfaithful spouse if you still want them around & they're sober?

My question to you is - what's the probability of getting it right a second time if everyone subscribes to your method?

Is there a guarantee that it's gonna be greener on the other side?

Can you categorically say that every divorcee is entirely happy?

MrBrownJay1:
You sound as if I am saying that the minute ANYTHING doesn't go your way in marriage, you should leave.... you make no sense. What's next? Your wifey and you have a small disagreement, so you should divorce her?!?!?!?

There is a huge difference between having small fixable marital differences and going to open your legs to another, behind your spouse's back.

Even @bolded, I maintain that infidelity can be forgiven if the two are willing.

I admire how you're trying to water down your strong stance - skillful.

May God help her.

felaismyhero:
everything you said is true.i agree with you; what i disagree with is you saying a woman who agrees to stay with her philandering husband or a man who chooses to stick with his cheating wife suffers from LOW SELF ESTEEM! that i think is far from the truth.

Lol

felaismyhero:
yeah,i gerrit now! you are right; there are societal expectations of the different sexes. if a feminist argues that those centuries old social standards do not have female input in them,how would you respond?(lol.i suspect @mrjaybrown is a feminist)

MrBrownJay1 is coming round bit by bit, he/she now admits that many issues in marriage can be fixed - good for a start.

Back to your question @bolded - I share that concern coz I believe in gender equality but we need not shy away from the fact that we complement each other just as we have our respective places in the social structure.

Today's world now tolerates female participation at all levels in our society & we cannot underestimate the importance of same with regards to the rapid growth/advancement in every spheres of life in recent years, particularly in the science & technology, healthcare, politics sectors amongst others.

34yr old slay queen.

MrBrownJay1:
It's called common sense.... if you believe that people should hang on to these poisonous union at any cost, then so be it. No wonder so many kids today are bleeped up when they grow up in such miserable/negative/poisonous environment.

You can't compare our parents with people of today. Back then people had NO choice/option but today that ain't the case. Comparing our parents/ forefatherswith people today, will have you fail on this issue TIME AND TIME AGAIN.

There are many issues in marriage that can be fixed... but DISHONESTY/UNFAITHFULNESS/DECEIT/DISRESPECT certainly ain't one of them. The minute hubby/wifey has decided to spit on your union (or you) by sleeping with another person behind your back, then that union is OVER, whether you desperately hang on to it or not.

You are the one who ain't facing reality by by thinking that staying with someone who has no respect for you (or your union) is the way to live life. Waste of life if you ask me.

Let me clear my position so you don't get it twisted ok.

If there is physical abuse is any relationship it's a NO for me - the victim needs to move on.

@bolded, you have actually covered most of the issues affecting a marriage & I believe that if the two are willing, infidelity also can be forgiven - I have seen it happen.

It's a relief to know that you also hold the position that many issues in marriage can be fixed - good way to start.

felaismyhero:
hmmmm,what is wrong is wrong.if a man cheats and the woman wants to go,then i would support her.but if she chooses to stay,then ok!

We're saying the same thing

- our level of intelligence wouldn't recognize our integral nature coz over the centuries we've formed social standards for ourselves to govern our conducts.

- now there's the knowledge of what's right & what's not right, therefore our consciousness operates in that realm of which creates a conflict between what we are and what we now think we should be.

U gerrit?

E don red for broke girls be dat.

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DevilhimseIf:
shut up
you're talking nonsense

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Hahahaha you also feel the need to put ya smelly mouth where human beings are discussing intellectual issues.

Hahahaha you make me laugh walahi fa.

MrBrownJay1:
You can only fight for what is RIGHT, and sadly, the minute a spouse has cheated then this ship is sinking...whether you hang on to it or not. Leaving such disrespectful/dishonest/unfaithful/deceitful person is certainly NOT the easy way, that's the hardest way. The easy way is to put your head in the sand pretending such can be fixed while we all know YOU CANT.

Finding the root cause for cheating?! Bwaaaaaah! Let me help you....if such person had any RESPECT for you or your union, they wouldn't cheat to begin with, and would instead work WITH YOU on such "root cause" you are talking about

You're simply operating the text book kind of beautiful marriage. Are you tryna say most of the beautiful couples or marriages we see around are void of turbulence? Are you tryna say our parents didn't have their trying times? Are you tryna say perseverance, forgiveness, sacrifice, selflessness, patience ain't part of marriage when problems arise?

You're still doing the same thing, you ain't facing reality.

9jaAmerican:
question is, will you be these calm when your wife fuccks another diickk??

I'm a man, but let's all be guided biko

We can't argue such a thing as our gender-influenced sentiments would stand in the way of mutual agreement. We're intelligent creatures & the level of our knowledge and development is unwilling to notice the integral nature of man & woman.

The man is territorial in nature while the woman is competitive, you can't compare the man to the woman as they are naturally different.

Hope you get my drift.

[quote author=DevilhimseIf post=81536534][/quote]You're noticed ok , oya crawl back into your cage.

Human beings are having an intellectual discourse here ok.

felaismyhero:
i dont agree with you sir.how a person reacts to being cheated on has nothing to do with self-esteem.have you never heard of forgiveness? or are all who forgive lacking in self-esteem?

Don't mind MrBrownJay1 , his/her disposition to marriage issues shows they prefer the easy way - their type hardly fight for what they believe in - no family values. If it's not working to plan they ditch the bitch, no point finding the root cause of issues & fix it.

Well he/she is entitled to their opinion though.

MrBrownJay1:
Any person has the right to leave their miserable union if they desire to do so. You certainly cant make the world a better place by having people staying in miserable marriage/union while being DISRESPECTED by their UNFAITHFUL/DISHONEST/DECEITFUL partner.

of course!!!!

The minute your husband decides to cheat then, i am sorry to be the bearer of bad news but YOU HAVE ALREADY LOST HIM!!!!

I never claimed that all men cheat, i only stated that all cheating men are DISRESPECTFUL/UNFAITHFUL/DISHONEST/DECEITFUL people.


you are right... but i am entitled to post my opinion on the issue at hand, isnt it?

As much as I would like to lean towards your ideology, it appears you're myopic on marriage issues. You come across as having a mathematical solution to every marital issues even as you would agree that 'one size doesn't fit all'.

I will rather take a different standpoint coz it's wise to have a holistic approach re this subject as critical questions need to be asked & all tools exhausted. This is important because the kids (who can't yet speak for themselves) will share/suffer the ripple effects of the foolish couple's decision to break the home.

Marriage is work & the two have to realize this - the future is not what we walk into, it's what we create.

Amakavula:
same was said about Goldie before she blew, support women for once. Ha

All the resources are there for Cuppy e.g money, good network, notable guys in the industry, song writers etc but Cuppy is just a lazy richkid.

You probably have to spend time with Yemi Alade, Tiwa Savage, Asa, Niniola & Teni...to understand how much work these beautiful flowers put in.

Nigga44:
How many albums do you have

Foolish question, is he a music artiste?

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DevilhimseIf:
lol this one is warming up against anambra 2022

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Pointless

Nyamuri:
Just like how we saw the FBI decorate 80 nyamuri flat.head bcuz their names didn't have Adamu and Akin right?

Lol @decorate...

Nyamuri:
You will only see those nyamuri from the SE defending corrupt people from their tribe

Just look at the idiot above that I quoted, they are the problem of Nigeria

Lol

wink2015:
Most of this armed forces men behave as if they are above death.

They take uncalculated risk.

They stand on the road and when the vehicle is reversing they appear not to be conscious of what is happening in the hotel.

What do you expect when our soldiers are not properly trained as per risk assessment, talk less of being aware of airplane in my school bag.

MrBrownJay1:
The reality is that, so long as she is "happier" divorced than in that miserable union, then divorce is THE only option for this woman.... and as much as many women choose to remain in these miserable Marriages (while being abused or forced to accept what they are against) it certainly ain't the way to go.

I hope you can maintain this energy when the man walks away for whatever reasons without being called selfish.

Let's work to make the world a better place ok.