₦airaland Forum

otooro: who is drogba and yaya toure?

Just two naija guys that just released their first hit single in Hausa language featuring dbanj and don jazzy

Another Okija: Who come be Augustine Effiong again na?!

This peopl ejust dey find chance to implicate Igbo man for this matter.. Them don reach Akwa Ibom state now.. next thing dem go land Owerri...

UNA GO FINISH PERSON ONE DAY FOR HERE....

godello: Can't this criminal hide his face in shame? In Nigeria looters are celebrated. God punish dat him mouth !

Bros easy...why not check if what he said makes sense.....read some meanings again..lol

But_one_day: May be they're watching pornographic movies with it , yes they are dat's the reason, when lectures are going on. (blue film) that is it, they can stop, infact 95% of 9ija women if u search dia phone u'll see. And they just can stop it....

you are greatly on point

But the guy should know all these during dating and before marriage..Abi e just see the lady today then marry her the next day??

Hugo7: Of what essence is it?....same thing was said last year but schools stood their grounds on 200..All this is noise making they should think of how to improve our standard of education in this nation and stop all this propagandas...

JAMB is simply confused...anyone still remember JME?

THE NIGERIA POLICE!!! I HAIL UNA OH...My experience was a bit funny...I experienced the Nigeria Police palaver during my fnal year in University of Benin...I actually grew up without a dad and my mum was in the Village then..My elder brother lost his job and couldnt cope with my school fees when i was still in diploma so i had to take the bull by the horn..digging foundations,soak aways and moulding blocks and doing all sorts of Lebuke work just to continue my education and become somebody.One day on our job (lebuke) hunting spree we met one of the telecommunication companies and we decided to join..One day as God may have it i was singing our indigenous song when someone got past me in the premises...He stopped and asked who sang that song and i told him..he asked again where are you from, i told him and quickly he introduced himself and lo and behond he is the chief supervisor of the project and my uncle too but dont get to the village so he called me on and asked for my qualifications and i told him i had distinction in computer sci but now in full time waiting to comeplete ..So he gave me an office and make me the chief inventory officer for a year...Gosh i made money and eventually got a good car...Now the story Proper..

One Sunday afternoon i took my time to wash the car myself and then yahoo boys was really thriving so every good car thats flashy was a target i didnt know..I called on a friend of mine to accompany me to an Amala join at Mission road..we all dressed up with 2 chics...we believed its gonna be a sweet outing...We zoomed off ...On getting to IYAERO to just turn right to mission road then one rickety blue bus just drove so fast and stopped in my front..i held my brakes behold 5 dirty looking guys just jumped out the bus and flashed their invicible ID'S To God who made me that was the first time to ever encounter the police at the age of 30..My heart sank into my a.zz..they dragged everyone out and started searching all over the car...after an exhaustive search they brought a list of all flashy car owners in Uniben and behold my name was the 12th..I was suprised...they asked me what i do, i told them..flashed my school ID card and the companys ID too...they now said we know you are a yahoo boy ..lets go to the station so you could explain further..I was so afraid cos it was my first time...I followed them to the worst Police station in south south..NEW BENIN POLICE STATION....When we got there it was a different ball game and they asked me to pay 200,000 or theyll lock me up and place allegation on me..I was scared...But something happened which made me know these guys are illegal...In the office where they kept me while other negotiations were going on ..I was backing the door when i heard a voice that asked Whats going on here.It was the D P O..as soon as i turned and face the man to explain,one of the guys just gave me a pinch, meaning i shouldnt tell the man whats going on...so i quickly told the D P O that they saw me with a car and they wanted to verify if im the owner...so the guy left and there was this sigh of relief from them...Immediately the released me and said i should just give them anything in my pocket...i gave them 1000 out of fear....As i was about approching my car i noticed my friend and the girls he brought has already fled...I laughed..I now asked one of the police guys who gave them my car number and name..He said any yahoo boy that was arrested tells them about the next young car owner in school....that was it..I parked the car for long so as not to attract Jealousy..Police na wao...

The second experience.....
I was going for my Uncles burial when i met some policemen in Patani..I have passed all other check points without qualms and after a thorough checking..On getting Patani in Delta i met some police men on a check point..they checked as usual but one of the guys noticed that my particulars expired last friday and i was travelling on sunday.The guy alighted me and told me to come down...I asked what he wants me to do ..He said i should pay 30,000.I told him i was going for a burial and i dont have that kind of money since im the one responsible for the expenses in the burial so i was careful...i told him there are no banks around after beating it down to 3k..He said i should leave my car at Patani and go back to Ughelli and pick up the 3k and come back...I said no i have 1k in my pocket before i knew it he entered the front sit and asked me to drive down to the station..I NEARLY CRY...he directed me to a station but before getting there he asked me which school i attended..i told him UNIBEN cos he saw the Alumni logo and sticker...He said do you know Ekiyor..former S U G president..i said yes he now pointed his house for me...I quickly pick up my phone and called Ekiyor cos the police station was quite close...When the police guys asked me who i was calling i said Ekiyor and he SHOUTED...BAD MARKET....oya dey go dey go..forget the money..I said no and insisted i want to see Ekiyor...before i could park the guy took to his heels till date...

Third Experience..I was driving to Lagos from warri so on getting to Uselu market in Benin a Policeman asked me to park that i jumped the traffic which i didnt...he quickly jumped into the car and ask me to drive to ugbowo police station at BDPA there...i said..this time im becoming stronger than them....before getting there i asked him how much is my offence and he said 5k..I said no problem ...I told i dont have money on me and i would like to pick up money at the nearest ATM he agreed...i told him i will be dong that after Uniben's maingate..the guy didnt know i graduated from UNIBEN..so i drove straight to S AND T Barrack..On getting to the gate the guy started begging saying i should forgive him that he has kids like me at home..I told him no that the money is in S and T barrack and i would like him to just see some of my dreadful soldier friends..the man piss for body before we reach the gate...i dropped him at the middle of the road and zoom off to Lagos....They are cowards but dont let them notice you are scared..One day their cup go still full...What a funny experience

dabrake: Yes oh. Make I talk my own. I get 2 tori but this one dey come my mind anytime I hear the 6-lettered word p.o.l.i.c.e.



I hated going to church. Infact I had not gone to church since I gained admission and I insulted most MOG and my church-going friends/colleagues. It was on a friday, october 1st, 2010. Was in my 2nd semester of my 2nd year as an undergraduate. I decided to reach boys hostel(our boys hostel is off camp and I also base off camp) to get my already charged reading lamp and study. See yawah oh. Na about some minutes to 11pm and me jst put indomie 4 fire come dey go hostel wey be like 600m away. I dey waka my own, 3 other guys dey the other side of d road dey smoke(dat one no concern me). Like 2mins later, one pick up begin dey race down. . . 'Hold them, hold them, hold them'. As these 3 guys run, me kukuma join them dey follow them. By my calculation, dem go enta bush but e no occur 2 me sey na dia area be that. I enta bush and in no time, only Baba J sabi where these 3 guys disappear go hide but these police fools sabi say person enta bush(me). Na so dem come back, stand for my front. The next thing I go hear na "shoot the animal". My mum dey sss so I dey used to the intimidatiom. My belief be say bullet no dey the gun. Omo, as one of the MIB(men in black) co.c.k the gun, I sharp sharp grab say bullet dey am 'cos if dem co.c.k gun wey bullet (no) dey, I go sabi. Omo, I fear oh. As I c.om.e see moonlight reflect d gun, d gun dey point my face, see fear. I jst use speed push the gun up. As the gun dey move up, the thing sound .







The thing hot. I begin grow goose pimples, my leg dey shake, I co.m.e piss 4 trouser. Wetin vex me 4 that piss be say I been jst piss correct piss and the piss wey I piss for trouser na piss wey I for piss the next day. My voice begin dey tremble. . . "yes! That is the criminal. . . Where is the gun? . . . Where is the iegbo?". I started begging them. Chei! I neva beg like that before 4 my life. I don already see myself 4 hell. I been wan repent there but fear nor gree me. I tell them ma full name, my dept., matric number, my hod name, my dept'al presido name, all my lecturers name, . . . Dem search me, sit me down for middle of road, eagle-spread my leg like common criminal with piss trouser. Dem go back that bush dey find gun and iegbo(which gun again). Na so one of them talk say make dem kill me say dem nor fit go empty handed. Your father yansh! I hold d gun dey beg them say na hostel I dey go say na read I been dey read. "leave this gun now. I go damage your face oh". for my mind, I dey tell am say "re-structure my face instead. This bullet no go touch me". After them don search me finish. One of them co.me tell me say make I open my bag. Na 2 advanced engineering maths textbook(ka stroud & hk dass) with one notebook there. My guy co.me open d note like say him sabi anything there. As my guy see wicked maths wey I don solve, him co.me tell d remaining 3 guys "leave the lunatic". Dem co.me drive comot.





I was still on the ground with my legs spread with disbelief. I got up, sprinted home. Wasn't interested in reading that night. As I reached home, I touched the flowers, walls, doors just to be sure I was still alive. I couldn't believe it. Indomie sef don burn(who cares?). I just 'shut down' the stove, wash the pot, took my bath, washed the already dirty smelling trouser. It was already few mins to 12am. Went back to sleep.






2 days later, I found myself in a church . . .

Hell yes..you made my day....o boy i hope u don finish school by now oh.....i go relate my own ordeal..na Amala put me for trouble for Benin

someone made me angry today but when i just opened this thread to read about the new born baby..all i see is funny guys blasting the innocent guy....i wan laugh die...so Timaya has been signed by BCC Lions of GBOKO for life??una go wound person here.....

intelligen: If robben had scored..wld he have come out to say this?....besides,wen did he become t.b joshua jnr?

It was a mind game...celebrate with the champions and stop hating

Point out where it is in the Bible to thank God for what makes you happy....just quote a verse...mtchewwwwwwwwwwwwww

moHot: And this is on the front page?? **OH NO! NO HOPE AGAIN

O BOY YOU WAN FINISH ME WITH LAFFF

moderattor: You must be from Congo or central kenya

Dey show ur small self oh

maclatunji: 60%

Like say you sabi head ball...lol

ikelvin: d'banj is still d best african musician so far, wit or without don jazzy

Bros you sure..?? even Lagbaja better pass Dbanj...abeg go eat shyt

I love NLanders...when Ghana flush us from their home youll see everyone here nuited to curse pooh out of their azz...we are watching.....they shouldnt dare us in anyway....

greatlee: Yahoo boys, 419ers, politicians, fake pastors and dubious business men/women are all in the same business. After all, how many people in naija makes a clean money? If your guy is a yahoo boy, pray for him to hit a jack pot and when he does, advice him to invest the money in a good business.

Which crime or sin is really bigger than the other.....Holier than thou guys wan finish me with laugh

rasputinn: Bad market

Im not moved by all these bandwagon effect,what are the fundamentals/products of facebook that will sustain or drive the share price higher to guarantee good ROI in the medium to long term?

Im towing the line of Warren Buffet on this;NOT BUYING

GBAM!!! SECONDED!!! +10000

LeoMax: It dont matter where you live, get a partner in US to set up Fidelity or Charles Schwab for you using their ssn and dl and get online and you can trade using US ip and you can withdraw your earnings.

No try am oh..your money go just enter voicemail US partner indeed

Babzilla: Meeeeen FCK Ola
FCK Chris
FCK BBA and any BB for that matter
FCK the participants, and the jobless fans.

Honestly what is BBA teaching the entire Africa....I dont seem to just comprehend...I watched it abit with some guys and chicks and all they wanna see is the part where someone wants to FVCK or take her bath with someone...Is that what BBA is really all about?? someone should put me through please.....

This has shown that only Nigerians have the right to keep Nigeria one...No country messes with us..south africa tried it and got more than they can chew.....now ghana's comparison with internet....Tell me what will happen if all internet users in Nigeria moves to ghana....rubbish...Because Obama visited and commended them as the giant of Africa doesnt really mean they are better off...Watch out as Obama looses the US forthcoming election simply because he hates us.....We are Nigerians...wether good or bad...we are good people and of course great Nation.....wether bad leaders or not..one day we will get it right.....

this tells you that soonest the military will take over...read it very well

i initially thought Nigeria can never be divided..Now im having a second thought seriously

Let me help the Boko Haram boys out...You guys should get a flight and direct it to Aso Rock when those guys are having their Plenary session or whatever they call it....if you can do this then youll have the support of all Nigerians to share the country

faceless Boko Haram attacking faceless Nigeria govt..

I had a dog called spanky..just got it from a friend..didnt like dogs anyway but i tried to contain him...One night i came back from a drinking spree...i really drank to stuppour that day forgetting that i own a dog,I opened my room door and hopped into the bed...when i woke from sleep i felt something on the bed lying his head on my arm ..Behold it was the dog..Damn i was like what are you doing here but the dog refused to take off..It was then i realised the dog is truly a mans best friend..Then one evening i came back from a golf tournament where i won and after the dinner party and trophy presentation i went to meet the guys that served food that night for remnant from the party..i bought alot from them for the dog to enjoy...i was happy coming home with some rich stuff for him...When i got home i shouted..Spanky ...Spanky ...Spanky but i couldnt see or hear the normal little barking....it was then i realise i love the dog...i combed the whole area and went as far as into the bush only to see him hung on a trap..I cried and went back to the house to borrow a cutlass..I went back to the trap and demolish the whole area with the cutlass....I felt relieved but spanky was gone..Loosing a pet can be painful...but iv gotten another one...and im keeping an eye on him...

Please can anyone tell me how useless threads makes the frontpage??

Im not a Jehovah's Witness but i do read the popular AWAKE cos it sounds so intereSting but i was moved yesterday when i saw an article of January 2012 about honesty..I opened the little but educative book and behold i saw something about internet fraud...My mind told me the name Nigeria might be there and lo and behold it was there just about third paragraph..I now asked its Nigeria the only fraudulent country in the world?? and why should a popular journal just paste the name Nigeria there for reference reasons....believe me other countries are far worse than nigeria and i do believe that the internet fraud in Nigeria has reduced and shifted to other countries...Why Nigeria and not other countries.

Does GEJ look better in this pic...(PIC)

doctokwus: Truth is bitter,but shd always be told.If GEJ has not bn d disaster many pple av now come to realise,there wudnt b d avenue 4 d likes of Buhari to show dere face again,talkless uttering dis kind of provocative statement.So hate d aboki much as u wud,an avenue for d bitter truth was provided by d fisherman

My mum sat me down and told me about the civil war..i swear if you see war you wont survive it..pray it never happens.....

Mr. Globe:
First of all, Reuben abati you have 0 credibility. Second, I will vote for anybody who wants to divide Nigeria. 3rd. I stand with Buhari by saying that the federal govt led by Jonathan is the biggest boko since he has not done anything to prove otherwise. 4th how can jonathan be talking about corruption in the petroleum industry during buhari when he set and is still keeping a world record. 5th. This entire release is egocentrical, petty and thus thrash! 6th. Resign now jonathan

YOU ARE SIMPLY STUPID