₦airaland Forum

Humanoid01:
I'm in a similar situation right now. Thanks for being completely honest. The feeling of jealousy, as well as other negative emotions made me conclude that sometimes, our thoughts are not efficient enough to control our emotions.

I don't want to be jealous, but most times I find myself helplessly feeling that way. No matter how much I try to control it, it just lingers.

KenBen217:
This post is not to be underrated. this topic you have brought is a very sensitive one I remember commenting something a few weeks ago in this same tune of jealousy. I always used to see myself as this brilliant guy with a lot of potential who'd go out to the world to show his genius. I used to feel I'll be big by 20...my dear,reality cleared my eyes,I'm still far behind most of the goals I've set for myself,and recently,I started feeling a very strong sense of jealousy towards my best friend...trust me...my very best friend..however,I had to hit my self back to reality and tell myself that in this life,I should get comfortable with people being bigger than me or richer than me. I am not accepting defeat,I'm being realistic because it is reality. so if someone is doing better than me...what is my reaction.i accept it,and live with the truth,and use it as inspiration to try to do better for myself...if you know how I jealous my friends wey the get fine fine girlfriends that way wey girls dey shakara for me ehn...lol...inside life...you'll be alright sha [quote author=Liliantalks

KenBen217:
This post is not to be underrated. this topic you have brought is a very sensitive one I remember commenting something a few weeks ago in this same tune of jealousy. I always used to see myself as this brilliant guy with a lot of potential who'd go out to the world to show his genius. I used to feel I'll be big by 20...my dear,reality cleared my eyes,I'm still far behind most of the goals I've set for myself,and recently,I started feeling a very strong sense of jealousy towards my best friend...trust me...my very best friend..however,I had to hit my self back to reality and tell myself that in this life,I should get comfortable with people being bigger than me or richer than me. I am not accepting defeat,I'm being realistic because it is reality. so if someone is doing better than me...what is my reaction.i accept it,and live with the truth,and use it as inspiration to try to do better for myself...if you know how I jealous my friends wey the get fine fine girlfriends that way wey girls dey shakara for me ehn...lol...inside life...you'll be alright sha [quote author=Liliantalks

pocohantas:
The irony of this whole argument is, in reality, there are way more women doing this. There are so many women with paralyzed husbands and all.

Turn the table... The second you as a woman suffers any illness that makes you unable to function- e no go pass 1mth, you are back to your parents house.

Whatever the woman wants to do is up to her. 99% of Nigerian men won’t do same.

Descortes:
my agbor sister

Oya no vex I'll give you a proper advice now

Descortes:
please don't tell me you are from ika

Stop soiling our name with your stupid entitled mentally abeg

Kryptonvinyl:
[s]Hmm. Jealousy can push someone to commit murder. Its been happening since times past, like Abel and Cain, or you'll hear stories of a junior prince killing his Senior just to become king etc etc[/s].

Let it out. Focus on the reality and stop dreaming of fantasies. Try to improve yourself and see if things will turn for the better. Good luck! Me sef have my own problems

Theundertaker:
are you girls very close

Theundertaker:
My friend got a new phone back then when I couldn’t afford one , I felt bad , like maybe the world was against me succeeding , but at the end of the day , u just hav to realize that u hav to move on with ur life , jealousy is a very unhappy feeling. Force urself to be happy with the situation even if U are not .keep pray for ur own. God will bless you I promise

Descortes:
lol. [s]Did I lie?

You are jealous because your friend got a cheerful giver of a man and you've never had such a man.
I vividly remember a thread where you lamented of always getting stingy men

I have told you.. you go OLD [/s]

Nebes:
Acknowledge the feeling but don’t give it verbal expression.

If possible express admiration for the person’s result and ask for help to achieve yours.

You will be totally surprised how easy you will achieve your desires by appreciating others and asking for help.

My dear nothing just happens. If they have it and you don’t, there’s definitely something they are doing differently.

Descortes:
In your thoughts: She got a rich and very generous man who pays her monthly alawee. Why can't i get someone like that


at times we don't get to have what we're too desperate for..
Dey wait for man wey go carry your financial burden...

You go OLD

minicky:
guys need your help am very confused with life because I have nothing doing I need to learn a skill but confused on what skill that will help me in am a guy of 20yrs .guys can anyone refer any good still I can learn and that pays well

James4bright:
Why do you think the rate of divorce in Nigerian keeps skyrocketing? So many men aren't happily married. I can tell you a lot, but it's unnecessary.

Though, there are some good and bright women but they only make 25% of the populace. The rest are just empty headed people walking with wevon.

Let me teach you something, anyone who uses the word "stingy" a lot is a chronic beggar and a lazy mofo.

If you don't spend so much time begging, you won't even know who is stingy or not. Double your hustle barbie, don't be a pain in a man's ass.

Eberechi24:
This shouldn't be an issue na. If you have the means to pamper yourself, do it without waiting on anybody.

Life is short, don't make it shorter by depriving yourself of goodies in hope of a man.

jelraj:
Whatever works for you sis..
Remember no preference for life.. I pray you meet your standard b4 your clock starts thinking. Lemme guess you are still young and have age on your side..

Let's see what you will say when you clock 35 still searching for the standard you set for yourself.. Of course marriage is not for everybody and you can always be happy without it.
Life no go shame us

InfinityFabric:
I'm 101% sure u don't.

There's a difference between father and father figure. There's a reason I mentioned the last part, and there's a reason u goofed.

U don goofed m8.

Bitterness towards men, sounds familiar!

https://video.twimg.com/ext_tw_video/1278043385685737481/pu/vid/320x568/70kidyTemXvRODml.mp4?tag=10

tunjilana:
Just know that most men are not like women, who wont touch it if they dont want it.

So if u set the standard way higher than what even you represent, and u keep giving green light to men way ahead of u in everything, this men wont say No, they will basically just use and dump U

It will take a couple of cycles before u realize that you are being very realistic.

You want him very fine and attractive, are you very fine and attractive too?
You want him very wealthy, where is your own wealth?
You want him hardworking and resourceful, are you equally this?

Many women are damaged goods right now because they stretched their hands way too high during their young years. They could have gotten a committed meaningful suitor if they stayed within range of their own capacity too

jelraj:
I'm realistic because I believe in happiness regardless of whatever situation life places one self. If you encourage all women not to marry struggling dudes, many will remain single and die old.. Biological clock is not friendly and I know most of them don't wish to be baby mama's.. Not every guy is gonna make it, except we wish to lie to ourselves. Everyone deserve to be happy. I don't even believe in bringing children to this world to suffer, if the couples can only manage with one let them go ahead. Happiness is the priority.

It's sad many women will end up unhappy for the rest of their life, many don't marry men they are attracted to they just want financial security such as the OP.. After having children, they feel empty at the end. I've seen such things happen.
People like OP don't end up marrying who they want but who is available.. They sacrifice their happiness

InfinityFabric:
Proper title: Don't ever let your children lack a father figure.
Why? The disjoint crap written by OP is what happens to them too.

James4bright:
I want to be fucking rich with a woman with the same goals.

Nigerian women aren't that smart. You only see their intelligence when it comes to lying to a man just to collect enough stipends for their luxury spendings.

Date a Nigerian woman and watch yourself fall to the ground.

Raydans:
Safe to say men is your god. Without a man you are nothing but a piece of dust

James4bright:
Truth be told, I'd never allow my wife to stress even at the slightest while pregnant.

But that doesn't mean, I'd date a parasitic woman without life goals, that her life revolves around a man's wealth. No sane man wants that anymore.

James4bright:
Heavy pregnant women work out. I saw a video of a woman who was about to give birth that day, she tried as much as possible to do some little dance exercise that day. Her delivery was safe and perfect.

Those girls are just unproductive.

James4bright:
Lol. I'm Igbo oh. We are wiser now. Gone are those days when men were ignorant.

James4bright:
Like pregnant women can't run blogs or do some intellectual works. Don't mind her.

Raydans:
You had their time. That Lilian was talking from both sides of her mouth.

How can you claim you're not broke, you're independent and self sufficient and still be noticing that men are stingy at same time. She was even saying it is an achievement to take care of your own self asif you are supposed to be dependent on someone that is not your husband or father in the first place.

Where I gave up was when she was again comparing herself to other women as her reasons of noticing stingy people.
What a damaged, entitled mentality

ModestGal:
Lol, Why are you quoting me up and down on my replies to someone else, I guess you are the one pained here that I didn't agree with being a parasitic whatever. Stop crying fowl, learn to respect other people's Opinion. You are the type that make men shame women
All my quotes in this thread are explanation to when people directly question me

ModestGal:
Girl, if you can't read and understand well, just leave my mention and stop being hypocritical. You mentioned physically yourself, its so glairing in your post and you are even lieing just because you feel threatened somehow with your choice.

[s]Did I write anywhere that financial stability isn't relevant when I quoted you? Or does telling women to be empowered equates financial stability is a crime, that is how you quoted me saying I'm forcing my believe on someone that practically mentioned me first and trying to force her GOLD DIGGING PARASITIC BELIEFS on me. I only reply after being quoted, I RESPECT people's BELIEFS but wont allow them force theirs on me, so you are wrong AGAIN. Go and sit down abeg, I dislike hypocrites[/s]