₦airaland Forum

AfroKnight:
Parts of the story have been altered cos affected parties might be nairalanders.

A while ago, I met a beautiful woman. She carry front, she carry back. Both in desirable proportions. I got her number and we got talking. We soon advanced to long calls, flirting and risqué jokes. Then she posted a boy on her WhatsApp status one day and the caption rocked me to my foundation. I asked and she confirmed that the little boy was her son. Okay.

“Where is his father?”

“He is not responsible. He is not involved in his son’s life. I take care of him alone.”

“Well, no problem”, I thought to myself. I reminded myself that it is not my dream in life to deal with the complications of raising a son who is not biologically mine, especially one whose father is still very much alive. So, I slowed down. Reduced calls until we drifted apart.

I told a female friend of mine about this and the way she looked at me ehn, I was wondering what I did wrong. She was so disappointed in me for refusing to date a single mother.

Well, I gave that friend of mine a piece of my mind. She had no right to project her concept of right or wrong or even chivalry on me! I am nobody’s saviour. I cannot pick up the responsibilities of another man who is alive and well. It is not only unfair but incredibly unjust to put a man on the spot by letting him find out you have a child after you guys have started flirting and even advanced in the talking stage of a budding relationship. I don dey feel you to the point of starting a serious relationship and I discover this? It is wrong.

And it is even more offensive that you would expect a man to just take it in stride.

Guys do not be shy to refuse if you don’t want.

Some guys are cool with it and that’s fine. If I’m not cool with it, don’t demonise me. It’s my choice.

Share your thoughts please.

1. Her child comes first before you, whether dating or married to her.
2. There will always be a third party in the marriage or relationship.
3. She can exit your life any given time. She has built herself to be independent and she can revert to that whenever she suspects you.
4. And yes, she will always suspect you.
5. Have a quarrel and she plans on leaving. Hence your life and mindset will always be on the edge.

This happens in most of the cases. They dont normally heal after the pregnancy incident (pregnancy, coping with family, the child, etc) and the next guy will bear the brunt of that hate for men.

hedonido:
You're a joker. Most likely a salary earner (with the typical work ID card mentality). Start a business; be an entrepreneur or think like an entrepreneur and then see how ridiculous this your suggestion is.

Yes, I am a salary earner. I am ordinary Assistant Professor, tenure-track in the States.
To your comment; entrepreneurs register their business with the CAC, I believe. They can easily make ID cards for themselves. I know because I have friends in Nigeria, entrepreneurs, with ID cards.
The other documents I mentioned are documents they have.

musicwriter:
Only a petty criminal would, of course, engage in such theft. But no matter who the thief, his chance of getting caught would be high. By the way, let me know your own suggestion on how Uber should solve this type of eventuality.

My suggestion would be similar but perhaps a bit more thorough; A complete vetting of passengers like drivers are vetted, down to provision of referees, scanning of work ID cards, educational qualification documents, international passports, etc. This has its downsides as it means there would be less customers as it starts, but the safety and the thorough vetting process will be pushed as Uber's USP and its customer base should increase over time.

musicwriter:
Sorry bro, but you have a misunderstanding about what I suggested. Of course, I know we don't have a good national database. But Uber can maintain a database of it's own users if they want. If what I suggested works with national database, it means criminals could even be caught by the driver before they board the ride.

Bro, I agree but you are assuming that the criminal is known OR has a criminal record that was sophisticated enough to get into some records. It might be successful petty theives and "one-chance" operators who chose to commit crime with his fellow petty criminals. That is why they panic and kill people. These ones are so petty & traditional that they didnt know cars like that could have trackers.

musicwriter:
I don't think you fully understand the implications of what I said, unless you mean the criminal (in advance) wish to be caught.

The killer would probably be caught before he/hails an Uber if (1) He/she is on a wanted list having committed/ attempted to commit a crime before and is known to Uber or (2) If the driver is alerted during the trip about the history of the passenger.
This means government database, coordination between security services & uber, high-tech tracking etc. Nigeria doesnt have that at the moment.
Without these, a driver is as good as dead once a killer enters into his vehicle- unless the mercies of God steps in.
It is similar to the Jumia story of someone killing a dispatch driver (https://pmnewsnigeria.com/2017/03/29/jumia-releases-statement-death-dispatch-rider-see-graphic-photos/). We dont have a comprehensive and realtime database in Nigeria.

musicwriter:
This type of crime can easily be stopped or at least reduced to the barest minimum by thinking outside the box. Let the T&C of service include capturing a pic of the client, point of pickup, destination, then upload and send to Uber before any journey. Pic should be removed after a successful trip.

It would have still happened. Read it: They wanted to kill for a car.

These measures you mentioned would be useful for apprehending the killer and not preventing the murder.

EmperorTolson:
What baffles me most is the age of those suspect, 27, 23 and 20.
What'd have push those young lad into this.
Heart of many people are evil.

Broken homes.
Peer pressure.
Social media influence.
Lack of a strong male figure.

ogbiwa:
An Instagram model is tired of relying on men – so she decided to marry herself instead.



https://www.dailystar.co.uk/real-life/model-marries-herself-after-embracing-24929983

The depths man goes to pretend to himself/herself should be studied.

ogbiwa:
https://www.dailystar.co.uk/sport/football/football-goat-ronaldo-messi-maradona-24927379

Clearly a ManU fan.

iwaeda:
http://saharareporters.com/2021/09/08/let%E2%80%99s-be-our-brothers-keeper-%E2%80%93-gombe-government-begs-southern-states-reconsider-stance

When you were destroying alcoholic goods in Northern States owned by Southerners, you didnt realise about being brothers' keepers?

eedimo:
100mil?
You mean this money has been in his account doing nothing?

11 commandment - Thou shall not be poor for the Lord thy God hates poverty.

Peter Obi's wealth, largely from investments he made in his 20's and 30's, is in millions of dollars.

dfrost:
He was called to the national team when he was at Arsenal. Moved to Aston Villa and boom he was noticed.

That's stock rising.

He was the first team GK at Aston Villa. Of course he would be called to Argentina's national team. This is basic. Even if he was the Number 1 at Burnley or Norwich, he will be in that Argentina squad.

dfrost:
Yes but his stocks appreciated.

He is still at Aston Villa.
He should move to a top European Club before we can quantitatively assess his stocks.

dfrost:
Proved his worth at Aston Villa

Still didnt finish above Arsenal in their worst season.

fergie0o1:
Earlier, the Nigeria-led Government had condemned the coup, calling for the reinstatement of Guinea's first democratically-elected President, Conde.



UN Secretary-General, Antonio Guterres



African Union



SOURCE



Ministry of Foreign Affairs, Republic of Turkey




US State Department Spokesperson, Ned Price



Burundi President, Évariste Ndayishimiye

Has France issued a statement?
If you know, you know.

Vipro:
Is Business Analysis proffesional and relevant?
Is it a good career to start with?

Very, very, very broad.
Anyone can be tagged a "business analyst". It is a vague term.
You need to find a niche area and develop yourself in it.

"....happiness in themselves and live in their truth..."

That is a language used for gays, bisexuals and transgenders....

Simbrixton:
edo people fought igbos and yoruba tooth and nail dey started claiming onitsha and lagos just to put oduduwa and biafra off why we go support dem? malami must come out and defend his people

BKayy:
Let it be known that I am against the xenophobia perpetrated by the people of Ẹdo against the peaceful coronation of the Sultan of Shuwa Arab of Ẹdo state.
This might be a stumbling block to the peaceful coexistence of Nigeria.
Lets call a spade a spade. Ẹdo people are wrong here.
They should learn to accommodate their fellow countrymen and allow the Sultan to be coronated so as to bolster national unity and peaceful coexistence which the people of Ẹdo (Bini, Esan, Etsako, Igara and Akoko Ẹdo) fought for and are still fighting to uphold.
One Nigeria

See sarcasm!

HolinessForever:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SRVGoOH_ZCs

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9897279/amp/EXPLAINER-Western-states-face-federal-water-cuts.html

Biden's Legacy is growing man.

From Afghanistan to Southern Border to COVID to Highest inflation rate ever now to Third-Word type Water Crisis in the United States of America.

abouzaid:
Glory Left Home June 17 And Never Returned; Found Cooking For IRT Officers

Nigerian Human Right activist and DG, Behind Bars Family Harrison Gwamnishu has revealed how 21 year old Miss Glory Okolie who enrolled for 2021 JAMB examination has been in police detention since 17th June, 2021 till date.

He said Miss Glory left the house and never returned but was found in the custody of IRT officers cooking and washing clothes for them.



https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=6708910092468237&id=100000479373538

Poor girl.
They would have taken turns in raping her, for sure 100%.

longetivity:
Chealsea will be ousted from this season UCL in the round of sixteen. This I have seen

They are stronger and fitter this season and Tuchel has settled in. Unlikely.

udoji2021:
I just come across a thread about this topic and felt like contributing on it.

https://www.nairaland.com/6703059/struggling-hard-money-hasnt-come

Guys, I will not beat around the bush, getting married when you are not financially bouyant is the greatest mistake that can NEVER be corrected, infact, it's a sin and against natural laws to bring someone's daughter to your house when you are struggling to take care of yourself and consequently starts laying foundation of poverty that will last for generations if not forever.

WHY?

Experience is the best teacher, I'm a victim of such circumstances and I know what I face in that type of marriage and is still facing. When you make such mistake, you will start sleeping abnormally which is the first sign of things to come, it will then lead to over thinking and depression. Forget about family members, no one will be there to help you when you needed their help. Begging to feed or meet your financial obligations is even worst cos first, the insults you will receive can make you commit suicide, and if you start this begging, people will always give you fake promises, the time that you would have used in doing productive something will be on moving from one place to another or staying online to reply people. Forget about all this motivational speakers cos you will only see another motivational quote from them when the sh*t hits the fan.

Secondly, the saying that someone obtain favor from Whatever God when you are Married is also false to some extent, God don't pour manna from heaven this days as was reported in the Bible (don't know if this is even true), get married and sit at home waiting for favor from the Lord and see if you didn't die of hunger within days.

Most painful part is that, you may end up suffering for another person children ignorantly, HOW?

Let me give an example, I went to one politician for help and this man told me to back later, he later sent someone to call my wife and start telling her to sleep with him (heavy pregnant woman o) before he can help. I was lucky that my wife told me about it with proof of what the man was doing, that was the day I stopped calling him. Now, what if she agreed without telling me and continued after she birth?

Guys, hustle and settle down first marriage and thank me later.

Lastly, all this girls will keep telling you that I will manage, I will manage, but if they finally come and stay with you, they will not manage again. Infact, that is how some women have finally taken over their houses and start maltreating the husbands for been weak.

In a nutshell, I'm of the opinion that a guy should hustle and have money, hustle hard again and have more money before he can start thinking of marriage.

Adam was working as a
1. Gardner
2. Name Assigner
3. Farmer

Spiritually he was a
1. Worshipper
2. Always dwelling in the presence of God.

He was working. Not broke. Not idle. Any lady that wants to marry you without you working actually hates you.

udoji2021:
I just come across a thread about this topic and felt like contributing on it.

https://www.nairaland.com/6703059/struggling-hard-money-hasnt-come

Guys, I will not beat around the bush, getting married when you are not financially bouyant is the greatest mistake that can NEVER be corrected, infact, it's a sin and against natural laws to bring someone's daughter to your house when you are struggling to take care of yourself and consequently starts laying foundation of poverty that will last for generations if not forever.

WHY?

Experience is the best teacher, I'm a victim of such circumstances and I know what I face in that type of marriage and is still facing. When you make such mistake, you will start sleeping abnormally which is the first sign of things to come, it will then lead to over thinking and depression. Forget about family members, no one will be there to help you when you needed their help. Begging to feed or meet your financial obligations is even worst cos first, the insults you will receive can make you commit suicide, and if you start this begging, people will always give you fake promises, the time that you would have used in doing productive something will be on moving from one place to another or staying online to reply people. Forget about all this motivational speakers cos you will only see another motivational quote from them when the sh*t hits the fan.

Secondly, the saying that someone obtain favor from Whatever God when you are Married is also false to some extent, God don't pour manna from heaven this days as was reported in the Bible (don't know if this is even true), get married and sit at home waiting for favor from the Lord and see if you didn't die of hunger within days.

Most painful part is that, you may end up suffering for another person children ignorantly, HOW?

Let me give an example, I went to one politician for help and this man told me to back later, he later sent someone to call my wife and start telling her to sleep with him (heavy pregnant woman o) before he can help. I was lucky that my wife told me about it with proof of what the man was doing, that was the day I stopped calling him. Now, what if she agreed without telling me and continued after she birth?

Guys, hustle and settle down first marriage and thank me later.

Lastly, all this girls will keep telling you that I will manage, I will manage, but if they finally come and stay with you, they will not manage again. Infact, that is how some women have finally taken over their houses and start maltreating the husbands for been weak.

In a nutshell, I'm of the opinion that a guy should hustle and have money, hustle hard again and have more money before he can start thinking of marriage.

“Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it?

Luke 14:28

Anyone that encourages men to get married believing God will miraculously show up after he says, "I do" is an evil person.

naptu2:
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-africa-58175708.amp

Adaobi Tricia Nwaubani is journalist-for-hire na.

Her and Frederick Nwabufo belong to the same Whatsapp group.
No serious persons takes their opinions seriously.

newbornmacho:
I actually am impressed with these CNG guys for this. At least this position is just.

If it is their official position, he should state it publicly with his chest.

Candidlady:
Senseless women



Some mothers Sha... Lemme don't talk






You know how many men your mama dey sleep with

Shiooor you too rollon





Smh

People like you won't allow this kinda union for their sister

I will lock both of them up if they try this.
But I respect every man and woman with their choices. Hence, Delta men stay winning...

MrCover:
Update From . COM

A Nigerian man is reportedly set to marry two women on the same day in Delta State, Reports.

According to the wedding invite seen online As Sighted By On Facebook, Akpove will be getting married to Kome and Maro in Lagos-Igbide in Isoko South Local Government Area of the state on Sunday, August 15.

See Photo As Obtained By Below:

Source: BLOG

Delta men stay winning...

fergie0o1:
"An Imo person, an Enugu person, an Ebonyi man will not listen to themselves."



SOURCE

Tell this old political hack that this useless narrative has died a long time ago.

Bukola Saraki, Atiku Abubakar, Aminu Tambuwal, Ibrahim Dankwambo, Ahmed Makarfi, Sule Lamido, David Mark, Rabi Kwankwaso, Datti Baba-Ahmed, Attahiru Bafawara, Jonah Jang, Kabiru Turaki, a total of 12 Northerners vied for the PDP Presidential Ticket and NOT one of the Lagos-Ibadan-Abeokuta Press and Politicians told us that the North wasn’t united. Did they listen to themselves and step down for the other? Instead we were told it was a sign of Northern political acumen and strategy.

Obasanjo and Olu Falae were the two prominent names on the tickets in 1999. Both Yorubas. Not one of the Lagos-Ibadan-Abeokuta Press and Politicians told us that they werent united. Did they listen to themselves and step down for the other? Instead we were told that it was a sign of the Yorubas political strength.

Put an Igbo name in these equation and watch how the narrative changes to, "Igbos are not united". Useless people . Thank God for social media that has killed that narrative and nonsense.

Vabama:
Source: https://dailypost.ng/2021/08/11/anambra-therell-be-no-election-in-biafraland-nnamdi-kanus-disciple-ekpa/

These guys are loosing it.
They have become tyrants and the Igbo culture doesnt do too well with tyrants. IPOB, your end is near, mark my words.

IPIGSRSHALLOW:
[s][/s]

Again, typical shallow sentimental hollow Nigerian thinking.
Rubbish, instead of you to state logical reasons why I'm wrong, you are here doing all you do best....praying and hoping for some rubbish trash.

Dont worry.
You will have the experience of these, "foot soldiers". Amen.
Once you do, then I can compare your experience with hers and state my logical reason why you are right or wrong.

fergie0o1:
https://www.nairaland.com/6684291/dss-releases-5-buharimustgo-activists#104399420



SaharaReporters


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i5J8D6-5CgQ

Dear Youths,

As much as possible, do not carry your protests to the Altars of Churches.
Believe me, you will lose the support of Christians that would have otherwise supported you.
The Muslims dont carry their protests to their Mosques, so why should you? It doesnt make sense.
Listening to this interview reminds me of Idi Amin and Abacha days.
Nigerians, you and your tribalistic hate & ignorance brought this upon yourself.

For me, I think the best course of action is to pray for Nigeria, the President & the Presidency. I am tired of seeing youths being killed because of they are vocal.