₦airaland Forum

Mehn! I can not fit laugh. Where are our undergraduates on nairaland? First Semester Exam don show oo

Mehn! I can not fit laugh. Where are our undergraduates on nairaland? First Semester Exam don show oo

NIGERIA FIRST SEMESTER EXAMINATION: 2015/2016 ACADEMIC SESSION.
COURSE TITLE: Introduction to APC Government
COURSE CODE: APC 101
TIME ALLOWED: 45 Mins
INSTRUCTION: Attempt All Questions
1. Discuss the probability of APC blaming GEJ for the next 3-years for
a. Dollar increase.
b. Fuel Price increase
c. Power Failure
d. Unemployment
e. Fulani Herdsmen Killings
2. If APC = All Promises Cancelled, where PMB is a constant, discuss the speed at which:
( i.) =N= 5000 promise is cancelled
(ii.) Feeding of school pupil is politicised
(iii.) NYSC allowance is constant amidst recession
(iv.) Fuel pump prices are increased deceitfully
3. Define the term, ''Budget padding''.
4. Mention 3 types of APC propaganda you know, and how they can be used in 21st century politics.
5. Mention 5 IDP you know that feeds with =N=14,000 everyday.
6. Mention the next 3 countries PMB will travel to and the disgrace he will receive.
7. If PMB is silent when herdsmen kill people and buys fighter jets when Biafra is mentioned, what is the probability that PMB is not a terrorist? Can you xplain why IPOB are called terrorist by Buhari and Fulani herdsmen are labelled foreigners?
8. Write short notes on these mad phrases;
(i). masquerade dressing,
(ii.) importation of grass
(iii). fantastically corrupt.
9. If x is change and y is lies/ propaganda, solve the equation, 2x + 5y = ?
10. If you used to be corrupt as a member of PDP and prosecuted by EFCC, but now fantastically corrupt as member of APC but NOT prosecuted by EFCC, explain the effect of generational curse on this deception called APC.
11. with a labeled diagram, describe the famous losses ever witnessed in recent time:
(i)-- loss of budget.
(II)-- loss of WAEC certificate.
(iii)- loss of the moon.
(iv)- loss of ear drum.
12. If President Buhari @ 73yrs received his 1953 secondary school classmates, with relevant logic, explain how old PMB was when he finished secondary school considering the fact that from 1953-2016 is 63 years.
Your Time Starts Now!!

May God have mercy. But truly, the way that I dislike the attitude of the members of the Nigeria Army knows no bound. So many of them are just evil personified. Common human rights dem no know. How I wish the Nigeria masses will learn how to fight or at least stand for any civilian that is being maltreated and dehumanized. If our civilians can stand for each other like in three or four occasions of abuse, this illiterate soldiers will have a rethink. For instance, if five persons, both males and females had come out and asked why without shifting their ground while the abuse was going on they must adjust.

Please take note: It is not Lagos Police, it is the Nigeria Police Force in Lagos that said so. The Federal Government controls the police. If it was Lagos State's police I believe they will understand the meaning of freedom, fundamental human rights and democracy.

I am only angry simply because I foresaw all these things that are befalling us as a people. We cried out loud that this man has nothing to offer to no avail, instead my people called me names. Tinubu just used his media power to repackaged this man like a demigod, using the principle of 'the end justifies the means'. To let my friends know how sincere I was with my plea, I told them that I can vote for anybody in APC except PMB cause I strongly knew deep down in my spirit that he's not qualified. But I weep when my bosom friend told me that even if PMB had presented a NEPA bill as his certificate he would vote for him. That was exactly when I hanged my head in shame and wept. Now most of these people are passing through pains. Some of those friends of mine had even lost their jobs. Now the rhythm of the song has changed. My main points were: intellectually he's not fit, morally he was over hyped, he lacked the spirit of patriotism--I saw him more like an Hausa/Fulani leader than as a Nigeria leader, his age must affect him mentally cause we're in jet age, economically he was and still he's not sound. This is my first time of commenting about PMB since he assumed power. And this must be my last time till he leaves power...

THIS IS TOTAL TRAVESTY OF JUSTICE. A LAW MUST BE PASS FOR ALL MAKEUP ARTIST TO BE ARRESTED.

This is exactly what GEJ said before he lost the election. Is he tired of the turbulent waves in the mucky waters of the Nigeria Politics? Those that are ready to do anything for power get the power they won't. Ask Buhari.

The days are evil. When suicide bombing started, nobody ever believed that a Nigerian can ever wear a suicide vest and blow up himself/herself. But it's now the trending thing in the North East. This one is nature o, and we don't have control over it.

Nothing wey we no go seeee for this period. Buhari's badluck is seriously affecting everything, nature inclusive.

They can only burn the flag in Lagos or Abuja. But if they know that they have the guts, let them try burning Biafran flag in Onitsha or Aba, or Asaba. Shior!

The Bible says that "I will give them a leader of their heart." A wise man also said that when God wants to punish a people He gives them cruel leaders, and if He wants to bless them He gives them good leader. The rise and fall of every nation is traceable to the leadership.

That was exactly how we were saying then that PDP is bad but APC is not an alternative, yet APC took over. Now same thing is being said to APC, and that PDP is not an alternative. So, if PDP can play their cards well and rebrand the party, certainly APC will fall flat.

Mr moderator, receive sense in Jesus Name and take this to the front page. It's quite educative. Some times I just wonder what will happen to the Yoruba Nation if Tinubu is not seen tomorrow, cause death is innevitable. Who will wear his shoes? Is it the likes of Osinbanjo, Dele Momodu, Mike Adenuga, Aragbesola, Amosun, Mimiko e.t.c that will steer this great ship to the port that the people wanted? Food for thought.

For goodness sake! Make una allow this man drink water keep cup na!! Make una face reality for pete's sake. I'm so much tired of hearing Goodluck this and Goodluck that! I no blame una, if most Nigerians are reasoning well you lots would have been forced to face reality and be objective for once!

Truly, when I saw the clip of his speech I knew that this man is having some health challenges. It's only an insecure leader that is scared of delegating power or authority. Buhari is about 74 years old now, but I strongly believe that based on the Nigeria factor this might be his 'football-age'. At times I wonder, is Robbert Mugabe of Zimbabwe not older than Buhari? Then why does he looks stronger?

The way South West use repakaged and rebranded this man ehn, e still dey surprise me. Na from dat day I start to dey fear South West media. They even thought him how to pose, fart, breath and deficate. But he's still who he is. Chai! May God help us.

I called the embassy they said that they are unavailable for now until Tuesday. I have my confirmation page indicating that my interview was really scheduled that 29th April.

Good morning everyone. I need professional advice and help please! I was supposed to have an appointment with the US Embassy on the 29th April but I was told that it had been rescheduled two days earlier which was 27th of April upon my arrival and I wasn't informed. Who rescheduled it? That is what I don't know. When I was applying it was so clear that the date I picked was available, but when I got there I was told that the embassy don't work at the last Friday of every month. What are my to do? I don't know what to do. I'm attending a conference in the United State on the 23rd of May 2016. Even if it can not be rectified will it be possible for me to book for another appointment before my conference date? Please Nairalanders, I so much need professional advice and help.

Una sure sey boko haram never go change their jersey so?

I have never seen such a level of hypocrisy before like I'm experiencing now! Nko ti o da ko da-- what is bad is simply bad. There's no little black, black is black. At times, I just wonder, most of these people that see white and call it black are Christians and Muslims that claim to know God. It's quite disheartening and clear that our minds have been so much eroded with sentiment. Most APC supporters are happy for the selective justice but one day it will turn around and work against them. I love Karma because she makes precedence. All I know is that: Odighi ebe heji azu eje-- you're going no where if you're moving facing the wrong direction.

DjAduba:
My Friend stop being bias and go by Population of each geopolitical Zone. And stop grumbling.

What are you talking about bro? Are they distributing it based on per-head? Are they drinking the fuel since they are using population factor instead of the level of industrialization? Will you give Lagos thesame quantity of fuel that you will give Kano? How many company/factory do we have in Kano in comparison with Lagos? You self think am. It's not by population bro.

This thing deserve front page o. Satirically creative.

The Seguns and Babatundes, sooner we go see the Okechukwus, Chukwudis and Asaris. Later the lunatics from Futa Jallon go carry there own come. Till now I no know who dey spoil dis nation pass self. In fact, all hands are on deck spoiling and destroying this nation. There's an award for who spoils the country most.

The president is a typical Nigerian-- that finish eating gala before checking the expiry date. A whole lots of things happen retrogressively here...

Good morning nairalanders, please I have been invited to the United States for a Christian leadership programme for pastors or lay leaders. Truly my head is full and I don't really know much about it. Though the little I know is that it's a non-immigrant visa that I'm applying for; I will go to the US embassy's website to print a confirmation page before taking it to the GTB bank to pay for the visa-fee. But gathering the required documents is quite confusing. It's my church that is sending me out, but the organization over there is going to take care of everything including my hotel bills as well as my coming back. So, what are the necessary documents I needed to hold? After printing out the confirmation page to take to the bank, is filling the other forms online and booking for an appointment date too complex? Is it difficult to book for an appointment date like I was told? Please guys, I need your help, mostly on the necessary documents. Sincerely, I don't have much to spend on agents. I NEED HELP SIRS!

You guys have to say it rightly: APC ask Jonathan to speak up. Not all Nigerians.

You guys have to say it rightly: APC ask Jonathan to speak up. Not Nigerians.

Thanks a lot. But I need more information sir

I need help from you guys oooooooooo abeg!

I need help please. I was invited to a leadership programme in the United States but my passport number is incorrect. please how can it be corrected? does it really matter? can it be attended to? please sirs I need urgent reply.