₦airaland Forum

mikezuruki:
If my narrative is true, just as we have both assumed, I mentioned in the closing that his wife may have caught him still doing what he did 10 years ago.

The wife may know much more than op thinks the wife know. And since op thinks the wife doesn't know, he hence didn't share the full story.

If the wife got know what happened 10 years ago recently (not that she was told o), it means op didn't stop doing what he said he stopped years ago.

I even suspect op may have cheated! (my suspension though)

Let's say I agree with what you have assumed,why did she still go ahead to marry him and why now?
There are issues like these that should be settled or solved without using such as an excuse to leave her's matrimonial home and even threaten to take their son out of the country!

mikezuruki:
why are you guys here calling the girl silly?

OP is not being truthful. He didn't stop at creating fake account to express his flimsy emotions to babes online. What happened to deleting the 'fake' account you created 10 years ago?

How did she see it if it's not what you still use?

You claimed you have stopped the habit of creating fake account to follow up on babes (or people) online, yet you created another fake nairaland account for this post!

There's something sinister about you op! You're not being honest! She may have caught you in one of those your 'disguised' moments!

Deal with it Bozo!

Lets even say your narrative is true,is that a reason for her to leave her matrimonial home and hastily demand for a divorce?
so if there is an issue that needs to be settled in a matured way,she will rush back to her family?
She is even planning to have a divorce and leave the country...Haba...thats too fast!
Its obvious she was looking for a way out of the marriage and she found one that holds no water!

biggy26:
Hahahaha! your last paragraph made me laugh
Hahahaha! your last paragraph made me laugh. But guy, flirting these days have become very easy o, even when you don't mean it. And it has put many innocent people in trouble.
For me, she should have laughed and said stop! if she knew it was him.
Some girls will become angry and say don't play tricks with me!
But the way chat dey sweet these days and idleness persists, many people throw caution and decorum to the wind.

ridwanlawal:
Although 98.9% of Nigeria girl have the tendency of keeping second guy

And you have not put the damn ring in her finger,bro the PUSSSY IS NOT YOURS!


In Naira Marleys voice
She's not your girlfriend it's just your turn

Putting the ring or not does not guarantee loyalty or faithfulness or commitment from a partner!
A long time neighbor,back then in phcity,that is now married still visits her ex for s.ex!
So please drop that highlighted misconstrued narrative....
A lady who wants to cheat will still cheat whether she wears a ring or not!
Its a matter of choice!

PapaNnamdi:
I feel the CIA is involved.
this seems like a well planned operation by the USA..

my opinion though

Haba...didn't you read the report that the Iranian government have confirmed that they were responsible for what transpired?

emmaodet:
Mr Franchasng, will like to ask you some questions -
If a man smokes cigarettes and weeds before marrying, do you think he will stop it because of wedding or marriage?
What of Alcohol? Will he stop it?
If he is engaged with domestic violence with is fiancee, will he change after marriage?
If a man is stingy before marriage, will he change after marriage?
Then why do we see infidelity or a double dater as an exception? Why do you think someone that is not faithful to me will suddenly be when we marry? Marriage or wedding don't change people because all these things are Habits and can't be changed all of a sudden.
Have you ever wondered why the past or history of people, company, medical etc are so important?
Because by knowing the past, you can easily predict the future (Emphasis on PREDICT).
If you go to the hospital, they will request for your file to read about your history so as to know how to follow up with your complains.
If an investor wants to buy shares in a company, they will want to see the company track records or history or past so as to predict the profit or loss of future.
If you apply to a school, they will want to see your waec or past results to predict and value which department you will fall into or reject it.
Then, why should we overlook the past or record or history of a woman? Because overlooking the past is the Number ONE factor why a lot of guys run into trouble in marriages.
Why should or do we like to Sweep these women records under the rug and believe everything will be okay by Faith.
Why?
ubunja
Pansophist
Martinez39

This is the comment I have been waiting for!
Nothing much to add!
Thumbs up!

Filmewell:
Am not sugarcoating anything don't be surprised that if you ask him to give a brief explanation about whether they relationship is at a good place you will not blame the poor girl.

If the relationship is not 'at a good place' as you have said,the best thing to do is to QUIT the relationship!
There is virtually zero reason for cheating!

kunleweb:
I love the energy and morals you exude. Reminds me of the same standard our parents employed in grooming us. It's alarming that ladies now see indecency as the new norm and rarely speak against it as bluntly as you have in this thread.. I envy your bobo

Yes ohh...Her type is very rare esp in Nigeria!

thunderbabs:
Ones wey dey give ring sef still dey play friendly match talkless of whom you haven't even ringed yet.

Bysyd yansh +pekus, most of dem are badluck for guys.. Do them lasan, you enter gbege... Physically, emotionally , spiritually.

Jah epp u oo

Exactly....as if the ring will stop them from cheating!
The way some people reason is quite alarming!

biggy26:
What if she knew it was you and just played along? Some people don't like being tested, the moment you do it they abandon you. At least she said she had a boyfriend, unlike some others.

She never played along because she kept giving him all her information including her full address!
Haba....Though that's possible if a guy can play around with flirty words that could turn on a lady!

If she recognised his voice,she would be the one to stop him with a laugh!

She even bought the story that he saw her number from a teller during a queue at a bank!

She was even willing to accept a total stranger in her place at an unholy hour!

The buttomline is that she got exposed,got angry and decided to insult him(reverse psychology on display) hoping he will come back and beg!
The most hilarious part is that someone here said the lady has "standards"
Chai smh

Jewessgratitude:
Your point exactly? Do you know the sacrifice it requires for a lady to be decent? That is what most of you ladies of this generation can not do as you've traded your decency for high profile jobs by sleeping around with bosses and chairman to maintain that status.

I have been in the labour market before but was frustrated out of the system due to all those temptations from bosses and big clients.
Ive told a little bit of my story how I was asked to resign after I turned down a chairman. All because I want to keep my decency. And several other ordeals until i carved a niche for myself to be on my own. It may not be huge but im contented and can only pray it gets better. So I dont know exactly what you mean by what you said up there. Or you think we don't know what keeps

What do you have going for you? Or you think we dont know what you do to keep such jobs? At the detriment of your decency?
SMH.

Hmmmm.....I was never wrong when I said there are still some decent ladies out there!

In an era where morality has been considered folly and stupidity, its comforting to know that there are people who still hold on to that standard of life!

Please keep it up and do not change for any reason whatsoever!

NwanyiOkpa:
This foolish mentality is what people digest and take to marriages. That's why marriages don't last these days.

If you can't be faithful, stay away from relationships or just stay friends or Feck buddies.

Stop promoting ashaworism.

Thank you jare...Its unfortunate what the society is turning out to become!
Morality to some misguided folks is now old fashioned!

SoNature:
Haunty, calm down.

Well, one could assume that the girl was playing along just for the fun of it. However, her response shows otherwise. She clearly was not.

Based on her response, OP doesn't need a soothsayer to tell him that the girl doesn't take the him seriously.

If she had claimed that she knew that he was the one all along, it would have made perfect sense. But, she didn't show any remorse even though she invited an unknown guy to her house at an ungodly hour. That girl is bold, I swear it

While OP has to take the blame of not being able to catch her red-handed, the response she gave him was inexcusable.

No picture could be this clearer: OP was her second-best lover. She's just managing OP, believing that a better man would come her way so as to ditch him. Sure, there are lots of girls like that out there.

One of my friends got married to a girl by asking her to call her guy to tell him it was over between them. She did, and he proposed the following week. Yes, most girls believe that there's a better guy out there.

nsesam:
No matter what, you acted immatured and childish. Why can't you trust her and be happy with yourself Afterall she isn't your wife. What makes you think she didn't know its you even after hearing your voice? She told you she has a boyfriend right? The call was uncalled for

i am still perturbed about this 'after-all she is not your wife' cliche'!
This narrative has been used to cover up or defend those who cheat!
...If a lady can ask for loyalty and faithfulness in a relationship from her lover,then she must also be loyal and faithful to her partner!
Same goes for the guy!
Marriage is not a transformation gadget that simply induces a change in the character or lifestyle of partners...A cheat in a relationship will still be a cheat after marriage!

lovemko:
It's on FP
I repeat, its on frontpage bro!


Guys here blaming the dude don't know how crazy these emotions run at such points. I wish he could have pushed it further to get real proof but I understand he had to give in. The heart couldn't bare to take too much.
We learn everyday

True!

DarkJeddi:
A Black Mamba is the largest Venomous Snake in Africa and the second largest in the world,after the King Cobra and can grow up to 14 feet.

That said,this is not a Black Mamba..

Mambas are actually NOT Black in color..

Seems you are quoting the wrong person....if you carefully read my earlier comments,I said explicitly that the snake that was killed by the OP was not a black mamba...!
Though there are black mambas that are also black in colour based on some confirmed research,this particular one is not a black mamba...

SLAP44:
The African Black mamba

That snake doesn't look like a black mamba
A black mamba is usually smallish in size...i could be wrong!

I haven't replied her yet, don't even know what to say to her right now, thought about calling her but my brother told me not to, that I should just free her. Please guys what should I do?

Op i think you should take the advise of your brother....there is nothing more to say or add!

Kylekent59:
Many Nairalanders have formed the habit of commenting out of emotions instead judging the situation in the right process.


We also need to listen to the DPO's side of the story.

The OP is just one sided without stating what led to the scene.


This is 2020, Let us make a change on the way we see things, the way we judge and comment.


Yesterday, a NEPA staff was about to disconnect a woman's wire because she hasn't paid her bills. The woman kept abusing and raining insult on the NEPA staff.

If this NEPA staff slapped her, I still know many reports would still hid the first part in their pocket and publisize the action's part.


The DPO's actions as stated by the OP is very wrong, but we need to know what caused the fight and the full story.

As much as i would want to agree with your line of thought,i still believe nothing should warrant such treatment from the Police no matter who is at fault!
The police should be seen as a conflict resolution officer rather than being bias and brutal like a ruthless soldier!
Just like what someone rightly said,if there is an issue,they should be charged to court(you dont need to be arrested to be charged to court) rather than been humiliated in such manner!

socialmediaman:
Some agreements are dead on arrival. If they were planning to get married in a month or two, that’s okay, but 6 months? Come on now.

On a lighter note though, let me attempt to explain what’s happening between both of them:

When a man meets a lady, he tries to woo her. In doing so, he’ll agree to all her rules and she’s in charge at that moment. The man follows her. At this point he’s infatuated, he’s ‘foolish’ and would make lots of compromises to keep it going. Remember though that infatuation fades with time.

While the infatuation is fading, a lady’s love is building up though, she’s losing her guard gradually in favor of building her world around the man. On the other hand, the man is gradually regaining his ‘senses’. At some point the lady has become comfortable with leading the leading the relationship and she has completely put down her guard.

At this point the man, fully back in his senses, decides its time to take lead. He makes his move. The lady becomes confused at the sudden change of character, but she doesn’t want to lose ‘a good man’ she has fallen for, so she succumbs! Now she’d do anything to have him back, including compromise. This is the time many previous agreements are rewritten. Each party rushes to secure their place in the relationship and the rest is history.

At least this is true for a relationship that both parties are fully invested it

Cc: Lyydia

U really obtained a PhD in womanology!

Gina2019:
What is this one saying? Sex is the ultimate goal of a man in any relationship And he believes if he gets it for free, he has conquered the lady. He can do anything he want like cheats, be abusive etc.

But if sex is not on a platter of gold, he won't misbehave. He will lay down his guard. He will respect his woman.

Really?
So people still hold on to this weak mentality in 2020?
My dear the world has moved on from such narrative....don't be left behind!
..Chai smh

Trump2020:
you girls are something else.

It is easier for a man to walk out of a woman he hasn't have sex with than someone he loves and has sex with especially if the woman is damn good in bed and character.

You can't keep a man by denying him sex, he stays because he wants to stay not because of the no sex bulkshitt.

True

'Evil communication corrupts good manners'

If the youths are properly engaged in
meaningful and productive activities in school and at home,no reasonable person will have the time to be associated with such vices!

This just goes to show the negative influence that the musician has on the youths!
Too bad!

drinkwater na calamity

emeijeh:
And Man City goes to the second spot today!

Villa 0-4 MNC


@Dominique, na who calculate this maths?
14points ké?

Mancity Being 2nd on the table will be an added incentive for liverpool!
Atleast they will know that Mancity are their only contender for the league title...Leicester city were just pretenders!
But let them win Aston villa first

tonididdy:
This team is being guided by the EPL just so the EPL can seem like the best league, well it is the best league in the world BUT LFC is being pampered this season.

Pampered?

Do you really know the meaning or usage of such vocab?
All these haters keep changing the narrative of liverpool every week

Justinlean02:
Quote me on that day Arsenal will surprisingly end Liverpool's unbeaten run

Arsenal way no fit beat injury-plagued Crystal palace

specialmati:
no matter what suicide is never an option,may God strengthen us in time of difficulties

True!

ojaysam25:
they deserve to be were they are now....however even if they go the whole season unbeaten,I still prefer man city 100points record breaking season due to their scintillating football as the best team of the decade...

You are entitled to your opinions!