₦airaland Forum

The green light signal is very fantastic. If she likes you, this is how it goes.
Girl: Emmy (instead of Emeka), I heard you travelled. I really miss you o!
Guyman: Really!
Girl: Of course (with this wide smile on her face).
Girl: Emmy, you don't look well to me, is as if you slimmed down. What happened?
Guyman: did you know I almost died in the hospital, had it been...... (She interrupts)
Girl: God forbid. Please, I dnt want anything to happen to you o. Unless you want to kill me.
My opinion.

sexzskil: There was once a guy who came to scot with two of the guys in my compound when he came to write post utme. All the whole girls in the compound were into him cos he was so cute. Later, i also fell deeply in love with him, gave him all the greenlight but he was acting too rigid and gentle. Later on, i got obsessed with him, so that i became a dunce. But he was a psycho. One day he got angry, slapped my face, then went farther by slapping my head with my necklace. Maybe he got drunk that day... But later later, i began to thoroughly hate him. These were my top signs that i was so into him then.

1. I compliment him! Ladies never complement a guy to their face, no no, except they just too jovial with a particular guy. Even before we started talking, i compliment his facial structure, hairstyle, dress and all that.

2. I look into his eyes whenever the slightest opportunity shows up. Here is one thing, mature ladies always stare at men's eyes they interested in. The case maybe slightly different with teenage girls.

3. I cook him food specially. Now this was more than a green light. Do you know what it means when a lady, a girl, cook indomie for you, not only that, she cooked mere indomie for 30 minuites to the extent her room mates were complaining, ''Deree,do yu want to cook that indomie to death?'' I know what am saying.

3. I bite my lower lip a lot whenever i see him dressed. I do wish he can home into me right away, u know what i mean!

4. I call him. I am an arrogant girl, i never flash guys.

5. I laugh so deeply, showing my widest grin when he tries an attempt at humour, regardless how unhillarious the attempt is, and if really the comment was hillarious, i laugh my a.s.s off so that i cry.

6. I always disturb him to buy me something whenever he goes out.

7. My friends usually tell him i'm single and searching. I occassionally give a passive objection. (I was actually dreaming of marrying that dude. He became my personal celebrity; my fantasy!)

But the guy fell off big time at the end. He was obviously deeply into me too, but he was too egoistical and ''gentle''. At the end, he faced the biggest embarrassment of the year. I felt nothing for him ever agaiN.

That was when you showed him the RED light. Hope you flashed the YELLOW signal before sending the Road safty after the guy. B/ he refused to obey the Yellow (warning) signal

[quote author=dmcdad]Well said...

Another thing is, truth be told, some girls need to learn how to flash their flashlights. Seriously, some girls lack the necessary expertise to give a greenlight. Like this poster said, if you flash it as well as is necessary, every coded guy would definitely get the signal. Plus, I feel what's there to walk up to him and initiate a convo, and from there you would be surprised how he would pick it up. Maybe I am just lucky, but most girls I dated approached me first and in many cases I would help out with the rest.

And like you stated, if I don't fancy you, you would definitely get the sign as clear as daylight. [/quote
Some of them flash the three @once. Yet, she would still be asking herself, what happened.

3cycle: As a lady, sometimes I come across great post by a guy and I fall in love immediately. Most times I try to ignore the poster but I do Remember The username so I summon the courage to follow him and see if I can strike an online conversation before I send a pm but I never succeed.

Just yesterday a young tall guy on Nairaland from Enugu state gave me an all time blow when it was obvious I was trying to woo him, he started with iyanga and walah he ignored me completelyonly for somebody to call me names for making my intention known.
To make matters worst his response was "I don hang boot since last year"
Who says that to a lady bikonu

Do we really have gentlemen on Nairaland?
Can a guy reply pm's of a girl with an open mind?
What are the chances of starting an e romance if a lady were to be the innitiator?
Seun is it possible for us to chat with a nairalander without a third party involved?

I think the username.

perry2020: Kai sum ppl and funny comments sha.
Anyways my own opinion of a wife material is
1.a lady who can submit herself(she isn't too proud,neither is she boosy,she doesn't put herself above her husband and family)
2.a very understanding lady(sum one who understands u bcoz d key to a healthy relationship is understanding,when they understand each other some quarrels can be averted).
3.a lady who supports u and completes u(sum ladies have d ideology dat "it's my husbnds responsibility to do everything dats why he is d man"its shouldn't be dis way. a wife should be a helpmate not a liability.(take her out on a date tell her u forgot ur wallet n plead with ha to pay n c her reaction)
4.a god fearing lady
5.a smart lady and a lady who is very resourceful and independent not one who at just dating level is expecting u to buy cream,pad etc f u start now just get ready to do it forever.
6.a lady who knows how to be economical and considerate
7.a lady with good morals,very contented,not much of a gossip bcoz if she is much of a gossip my dear u are in trouble ooo.
8.a lady who knows how to improvise and multi task.
9.a lady with good personal hygiene and keeps her house clean,if she doesn't keep her house clean den how will she keep ur's clean. SHE MUST ALSO CARE FOR HERSELF PHYSICALLY so it won't be a matter of blowing up after marriage and u end up saying my wife is fat and I don't love her.
10.a lady who respect her parents and listen to advice.(if she cant obey her parents forget it she cant obey u. plus if she doesn't listen to advice whats d probability that f she does sum tin wrong and u advise her she would take ur advice and change.
11.a lady who is economical and has a very good saving spirit (this is a very important factor dat a woman must have coz some men spend too much it is d duty of d woman to call her husbnd to caution and try to impact in him d saving spirit incase of raining days)not the woman who spends all her earning on Brazilian hair.
12.a tactful and smart lady that can give her husbnd good advice when he needs it and encouragement
13.a woman who is string spiritually bcoz battles will always come. a woman is d bedrock of her home,it is her prayer that keeps her husband,and kids goin.
14.dis is quite important to some men. IF I WAS A GUY.SHE MUST BE A VERY VERY GOOD COOK COZ I LOVE FOOD AND VERY GOOD FOOD.( VARIETIES OF COOKING SKILLS AND RECIPE)the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. If a lady cooks better for him babes forget ur nigga oo.
15.she MUST be ready to satisfy him sexually(dis is another thing i noticed that drives men away from home when she gives him 2 days in a week roaster AFTER Aff Pay bride price oo. And u expect him not to look out as a young man.
16.a lady who isn't promiscuous(if she starts acting bitchy while dating what's d probability she won't turn into a LovePeddler when u get married, now it's not only men that bring in hiv and stds even women do.
17. A lady who respects u,ur relationship and everything u value including ur parents and siblings.
18.a wife material must be matured aldoe age is just a number sum times,its abt maturity.Good communication is also very necessary.
19.make sure she is fun loving(picnic,games,strolls etc) if not ehennnn ur marriage will be so boring.
20.be a husband material before looking for a wife material.f u ain't a husband material don't expect to have a wife material

Hmmmm talking too much already. this ones are d basic sha,got to look out for all dis in a lady. standards and taste differ it's not compulsory she has all.

If one could find a woman with all these (RAW) matrial. What else? But, believe me, there are men who have wives that provides them with most of these qualities, yet, they still run after other (fake) materials. Its all in you. What do you really want in your marriage as a man. Because majority of us married out of sentimental reasons. There is always two sides in every coin. Same goes with character.

Over sense they worry them.

sarutobie: the ignorance of nigerians with access to the Internet is just mind boggling...they just refuse to seek out knowledge on their own..imagine someone saying an already advanced leukaemia is better than ebola? A lot of them will even choose leukaemia over hiv out of sheer ignorance jeez!

Would you blame them, when some people talk out of their own ignorance.

XketchDesigns: At least him don turn celebrity for school

For where?
No be naija we dey.
But it was these same people that once to told us (without any verification) that he was positive. Now, the same people again. They have to pay for damages to the family for carrying such news. God have mercy. I'm happy him.

hungryboy: Taking your clothes to the dry cleaners instead of washing it yourself

To me its not bad @all. What you could have said is, taking your clothes to them when you cannot afford it. Just because others are doing it.

MayorofLagos: It means sex will be preceded by a question and answer session.

Boy: do you know what i am getting ready to do you?

Girl: yes!

Boy: are you aware i have an ere.ction?

Girl: yes!

Boy: do you know what erect pennees do?

Girl: yes!

Boy: under California statute code 739 section X.X.X, do you consent to be fvckd by this penees?

Girl: yes!

Boy: to prove intent and consent in the AFFIRMATIVE grab the penees and insert it in your body.

Girl: ok.


I change my mind about relocating to California! Im going to Utah instead.

Which means, that one "YES" is enough. Instead of asking her over and over. Because in the law court, sHe would be ask, "did you say YES OR NO".

Iamsynord: This is the Edge Islam is having..Hw many Muslim clerics have we seen divorcing ?? The two Chris ( the Chris okotie) and now Chris oyalkilome who supposedly has A PhD in Theology.
hmn ??

But not in marriage.
And they will find a verse in the bible to back it up. Many are called, but few are choosen.

Dexmars: Hi all,

I just got a call from my very beautiful grandma telling me about a supposedly ebola outbreak by 6am today.(I don't know if it is an explosion she imagined)

She went on to tell me that the only way to prevent it is by bathing with salt water.

I don't know who would spread such a story in my humble villa in Owerri west LGA.

Now my distant relatives in the east have run out of salt.

God Bless Nigeria.

Mine too, my landlord had to wake up every tenants just to pass the info to us. But he said we have to do it before 12a.m, without any reason. I was like, " salt....water....bathe" if it where to be a preventive measure, what happens to those who uses public transport? Would one also trake the whole day just to avoid body contacts. Another business for bitter cola and salt sellers. May God give us wisdom and see us through in Jesus name.

[quote author=Rikidony]Nigerian being treated in Benin for Ebola
2014-08-07 20:55

Cotonou -A hospital in Benin Republic is treating a Nigerian man
suspected of having contracted Ebola and authorities have sent a
sample of his blood to Senegal for testing, Health Minister Dorothée
Gazard said on state television on Thursday.

The case is unconfirmed but Gazard's announcement triggered
widespread fears in the capital Cotonou. Many people said they
would stock up on food and stop eating at popular roadside food
stalls to avoid possible infection, witnesses said.

http://m.news24.com/nigeria/National/News/Nigerian-being-treated-in-Benin-for-Ebola-20140807

http://saharareporters.com/2014/08/07/ebola-hits-republic-benin-hospital-treating-nigerian-suspect[/quo
Please, any info about this salt and water bathing rumour that is going on. Is it related to EBOLA or another preventive rumour as well. Thanks.

mitchyy: GISTville

https://gistville.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/african-brides1.jpg

Its just a few days to your big day. Venue, check! Dress, check! Husband, check check!!

Everything seems to be in order but do you have your list of beauty blunders and donts? If you really want to look your absolute best on your wedding day, here are 6 things to avoid one week before you say ‘I Do’.

1. Drastic Haircuts

Your big day is just days away, this isn’t the time to experiment with drastic hair cuts. You should have done that three months or more before during consultations. Its very important for you to maintain same hairstyle throughout this process because the texture and style of your hair change if you get it chopped. Don’t forget also that something drastic may not look right with your weave, dress’s neckline, veil, or wedding day jewelry.
The closer you get to the big day, the more stressed and emotional you’ll be. You want to make all of these preparations and decisions with a clear, calm head.

2. Alcohol

This is extremely important. Alcohol carries a ton of extra calories, so you may want to cut back or even avoid it like a plague at least a month before your wedding. Alcohol weakens can give you that puffy look and feel instantly. It also weakens your digestive system. Remember we want to look great in the wedding photos right?

3. A New Workout

By all means, stick to the routine you’ve been doing. This isn’t the time for new moves. When you strain your muscles, it can take weeks to heal and you definitely don’t want to be too sore to get down on the dance floor. If your goal is to lose weight, make sure to start a new fitness program well before your dress fittings. And if you simply want to relieve stress, then try taking long walks or a 5-minute run.

https://gistville.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/african-bride.jpg

4. Changing Up Your Makeup

According to a makeup artiste Jodie Hazlewood, “Sometimes brides panic at the last minute that they’ve got too much or too little makeup on. That’s why during the trial—when they’re in a much more rational state of mind—I give brides a chance to try out different looks. Modern bridal makeup is a little like red carpet makeup,” says Hazlewood. “It needs to look good on HD video cameras, professional cameras, personal camera phones, in bright light and candle light, as well as last for hours.” My advice to you is to trust in your makeup artist, who takes your skin type, age, hairstyle, wedding color palette, and the time, location, and style of your day into consideration when designing your look. Take lots and lots of water and get enough sleep to ensure your skin is perfect on that day.

5. Peels & Microdermabrasion

Going for a peel or microdermabrasion session is a no-go the week before you wedding. Some chemical peel or microdermabrasion can peel off your skin afterwards, leaving dead skin on the surface that can ball up under makeup. It can also leave your skin irritated and wearing makeup will only anger that irritation. Ensure you give at least 2 weeks span before your wedding when you schedule that appointment for any of such treatments.

6. Trying on new Skincare Products

You should only change your skincare regimen months before your wedding. I guess this is self-explanatory. Swapping in a new product could lead to allergic reaction, dryness or oiliness that takes time to correct. Make sure you see a dermatologist or skin specialist who can give you a personalized pre-wedding skin care routine which works for you.

Got any other donts you think brides should avoid few days to their big day? Please share in the comment section below.

Photo Credit: bridalmusings

SOURCE: http://gistville.com/2014/07/5-things-avoid-one-week-wedding-day/

Imagine the longstory, I thought it has something to do with the EBOLA virus. Your man is your man, your woman na your woman.

Naima00: What you say is definitely right and manner's are important but who will tell the grannies and old aunties that they need to call before they show up to someone's house lol

Except when they are too sure of meeting (@least gateman, house_help) someone @home. Unlike some of us who could travel @any given time for one important meeting or business. Otherwise, they would definitely call before arrival, to avoid story that touches.

ritababe: From abinitio we were friend because am a stranger in aba i have nobody to turn to except him, anytime he start his gen he normally take it far to avoid disturbance but since he woo me and i refused, anytime he start his gen the noise bang like an aeroplane in my window and the smoke fumes inside my room like trailer CO2

I report to landlord, he say he will talk to him(if he has done that i dont know) so anytime i want to read i will go to my friends place to read.

Please what do i do?

And this is even more reason why you should not date him. Besides, most of these close neighbour relationships doesn't last. Is he a boy, guy or man. Otherwise he is acting like a CHILD. See if you can talk to a matured person in your compound, but don't say the reasons behind it, except otherwise.

Really

Ruhbiee: 10. David Geffen
Unlike most self-made billionaires who left
college to start a successful business right
away, David Geffen's road was a bit rockier.
He graduated from high school barely
passing with a 66 percent average. After
attending three semesters at the University
of Texas in Austin and enrolling in the
Brooklyn College only to drop out again, he
went on to work for ten years in the
entertainment business before founding
Asylum Records in the 1970′s. In 1980 he
started Geffen Records, and in 1990 DGC
Records. With a current net worth of $5.5
billion, David Geffen is now one of the three
co-founders of DreamWorks SKG. Unlike most self-made billionaires who left
college to start a successful business right
away, David Geffen's road was a bit rockier.
He graduated from high school barely
passing with a 66 percent average. After
attending three semesters at the University
of Texas in Austin and enrolling in the
Brooklyn College only to drop out again, he
went on to work for ten years in the
entertainment business before founding
Asylum Records in the 1970′s. In 1980 he
started Geffen Records, and in 1990 DGC
Records. With a current net worth of $5.5
billion, David Geffen is now one of the three
co-founders of DreamWorks SKG.

My dear, it was easy for them over there because they had/have Governments who embraces such efforts. And assist them by any means possible to making their dream and efforts come to reality. But in our case, the poorest are the graduates, Profs. While the richest are those who doesn't even understand the word MS dos, Facebook or Oracle. How do you think we can make it here?

[quote author=daryoor]we've all heard about how the whole temperament thing, and the conclusion that there is no perfect personality, that all has their pros and cons.

there are intelligent women that are aware of their potential, they are their opinion without fear, the are very active individuals. these women can make strategic decisions in the absence of their husbands. but the down side of this type is that the emasculate their husbands because the believe very well in their opinions and the can easily point out when the hubands leadership is far away from ideal, and this leads to a lot of instability.


on the othe hand there are very obedient women who just nuture you and your kids, no ambition or crave for control, they just want peace and stability, i know you can be intelligent and choose to be submissive but im refering to those ones that got you shocked when you heard they are graduates, the ones that actually cant contribute anything logical or thoughtful, the kind of wife that you cant discuss your problems with an be sure she cant ever give u a well thought out advise or suggestion, women like this have no interest in politics, culture or basic philosophy, she can only talk about fathiah balogun and p. square.

i know these two cases are extreme but which is better? [/quoti
It is always good you marry someone who has the same temperament as you do. If you are the quiet type, get someone who is quiet. If you are the talking type, get someone who likes talking as well. Otherwise, you get bored when you end up with the your opposite side of your temperament.

chuxyz: I look at ladies who say they like being themselves and can't help but ROTFLOL. With most of them applying makeup like one coming outta a paint factory. Not to talk of the ego with which some will sway those expensive artificial hair as if it is the end of the world while they look down on every other person as if they are a piece of shit. There is one thing i want you all to know: Being oneself starts with being natural. Once a lady can't be natural, never accept a word when she says she is or likes being herself. Trust me that's a fat lie. Any lady who makes up is actually indirectly telling you that she is what she really isn't. In conclusion, i will like to tell you ladies that being yourself starts with being natural and if you all can do this, men will appreciate you more.

@op, make ups have nothing to do with self esteem. You are what you call yourself. If you hate make ups, you shouldn't judge those that like them. But too much of it is not good though.

seurhoda: I never believe this could happen to me, but i can`t just stop d love and affection i have for my sister`s husband.
I moved into their house a week after my sister put to bed, I`ve been helping them in the house work. My sister`s baby is now 3yrs old, so i`ve been staying with them for the past 3 year.she got a new job but she had to go to the head quater in Abuja for a six month training that started two months ago,her husband started making advances to me two days after my sister left for Abuja. And now he finally got me after much resistance.

Please advise me cos i am now in love with him.

Must we post every silly thing on NL. If u r in love with him, wot then do u expect from us after sleeping with him. The thing will now be I am pregnant for my sister's husband pls advise me. Rubbish.

opetu: My wife has been a torn on my flesh, giving me headaches daily. It happens dat I met her in my final year in school (fellowship), we got close just as friends nd within 7 mnths of knowing her one thing led to the other nd she got pregnant for me, well i accepted my responsibilty. telling my parents also, It was actually a thing of mixed feelingz, bein dat i am the only child of my parentz, at least thats like having a second child for dem. Long story short i decided to marry her cos of the baby..wit the notion dat we woud build our early relationship in marriage ..

Now issue is dat My wife doesnt like d idea when my parent come see me in my home, alwayz grummble, she doesn have a close relationship wit my mom, mom is alwayz sad about this..I ve been married for 5years now, ma kids ve only visited my parents for a week, anytime i bring up d idea of dem goin to see them..we always quarell!! just last week sunday ma parents left their home so dey come take d kids for d nu year break, i ddnt tell ma wife, but she found out, it was a fight that happened ....wit her tearing my clothes.. my old man nd momma both cried seein dis, dey had to travel back dat evening seein dat my so called wife ddnt welcome dem in my home, Dis is just d little i can narrate !!

I have two kids now, i kinda hate having a second child wit her, now am thinking divorce, which i dnt want to, tried to b patient, but its like shez getting evil advice from sumplaces everyday, how many years more does my parents ve on earth dat i wont make dem happy at least to be wit their grandkids!! at first i thought dis was normal, or is it a normal thing for mothers to cling to their child dat way?? maybe am too soft on her!! sigh i wish i never married her d first place, i only wanted to rewrite my mistake by marryin her.

You married her to compensate for your mistake. Because she was pregnant for you, you didn't sound like you actually loved this woman that much before you got married to her. The first thing you should ask yourself is this; did you marry her because she was pregnant for you (not that you planned to marry her). I won't advice for divorce. Sit her down, talk to her may be she is ignorantly afraid of something she is trying to protect. That is if only she will sincere. Good luck.

Is that why some people ask questions like this:1, madam do you have fried rice instruments instead ingredient.
2, Bros, do you have stocks jean instead of stock jean.
PDP will not kill us.

Evil Brain: How did Noah fit 2 million insects (1 million species x 2) into the ark? And how did be manage to fit 12,000 amphibians, 20,000 birds, 11,000 mammals, 16,000 reptiles and god knows how many crustaceans, arachnids and mollusks into a boat that must have already been overflowing with insects? Where did he find space to keep a years worth of food for all those animals? How did he keep the meat for the Lions, tigers and other carnivores fresh for a whole year? Why did he take mosquitoes, tapeworms, guinea worms and the HIV virus aboard the ark? Did he infect himself with all those parasites, or did he force his wife and children to carry them? How come all the animals didn't freeze to death at 9,000 metres altitude (the height of Mount Everest which must have been underwater) Where did they find oxygen to breathe at that height? What did all the animals eat after getting off the ark? All the plants must have died after a year underwater, and all the animals would have drowned so no food for herbivores or carnivores. How come all the fish in the ocean survived? Saltwater fish can't survive in freshwater and the ocean would have been massively diluted with all that rain. Or did the ark also have a salty fish tank with space for 60,000 fish (30,000 species x 2)? And how did he feed all those fish?

Not that I'm doubting this ark story mind you. Its in the Bible after all, so it must be true. I'm just curious about a few technicalities. I'm sure you have good explanations for all of them.

With God, all things are possible.

Pretyangel25: Ever since I step my foot in my sis house, the husband have been disturbing my life, first he sent me message and I taught it was a joke just last night he purposely touch my breast when I was in the kitchen cooking and I became so angry that I refuse 2 eat and my sis ask me why I'm that angry, I couldn't utter a word because he was staring at me.

He sent me another text this afternoon telling me that my sis is travelling on wednesday this week 2 come back on sunday and that he will have me all 2 himself, can u imagine? should I tell me sis and how will she feel? Because I don't want to create problem btw them. Advice please

What are your duties in the house?
What type of wears do you normally put when your sister's husband is around?
But what would you be doing in that house if your sister travell's seeeing the kind of husband she has?
Are they the one fending for you, if no, I will advise you leave the house in one piece.

sexylogan: I have had discussions with several of my female acquaintances and work colleagues over the issue of the "Responsibilities" of a boyfriend in a relationship and to my dismay, almost all had the same beliefs. Most of them believed that their boyfriends wer the ones saddled with the responsibilities of

-paying for their new hair-do

-buying them new fones

-sending them airtime regularly

-giving them monetry allowances

-buying them clothes and shoes....etc

The list is endless.

Most even argued that if he (their bf) wants them to look good, he must be ready to spend.

In my mind i was like "WTF!" isnt that their father's responsibilty?

The only exceptions i came across were some of the ladies who were raised abroad and a few who were born in upper class families.

Those ones have a very different mentality. They believed that it was after getting a gud education and subsequently a gud job wud they be able to take care of themselves and buy watever they need.

The scenario got me thinking...

Is Poverty to blame for the general attitude of our naija babes or are they just Greedy?

#front-page-tingz

Some of them are being insighted by their parents. When a mother would ask her (poverty stinking) daughter to ensure she dates or marries a wealthy man. What do we expect. The most annoying part of the whole thing is that some of them demand (not even beg) for these gift and money with impunity.

feeekey: Sorry wats today's date?

04-01-2014

Rudebwoy: Withdrawal doesn't really work.

It does, but that depends on the individual.

money-hungry :
Guys, Dating na wash oh, so this is how to be a successful playboy in naija. Nowadays, na playboy sure pass oh!. Na the rules be this:
1) BE ATTRACTIVE:
This is the most important rule in the game. Girls fall for
attractive guys, it's simple and plain. So guys, hustle and
package yourself: take care of your hair, skin, wear nice
perfumes, and dress fly!. I'm not talking about skinny
jeans, I'm talking about that grown man look and please
don't sag too much. No mean say you go keep trouser
for your chest oh. lol. Be a fine boy bro!!.
All that money wey you use dash one girl wey dey break
your heart and no even send you, use it and package
yourself so that you can attract more girls. Girls love
guys that other girls will trip for, it gives them more self
esteem. That's what's up oh, wake up!.
If you package yourself and look attractive, you don't
need all that "10 ways to get a girl" bla bla bla, all na
hogwash. Girls will come your way, all you need to do is
to know when to detect the green light from them and
zoom in. If you get nice apartment and car na advantage,
all na still under attraction because you will attract a
higher class of girls.
2) 50/50:
please, don't go extra miles to get any girl. If she likes
you, she wouldn't stress you, things would be smooth.
Stop the excessive calls, text, chats if she is not
reciprocating. If you've called her 3 times and you never
receive 1 call from her, omoh na jonzing oh.
Let her be, she's not feeling you. Because that same girl
wey no dey return your calls, get other guys wey she go
dey over-call like 3 times per day. You dey chase am for 3
months but emeka Don straff am within 1 week. Na
packaging. That's why I say you should package and be
attractive (number 1 rule).
If you're attractive, you would have enough girls and the
few jonzing girls wouldn't matter. Even Jay-z can't get
every girl but his "attractive" money can get him enough
to last for his lifetime.
3) DON'T DEPEND ON MONEY:
money is good but it's not the ultimatum when it comes
to getting Nigerian girls. If you must spend, spend it on
yourself. It's called packaging... Again the most
important rule comes in: be ATTRACTIVE.
Those who depend solely on money to get a Nigerian girl
are guys whom are "unpackaged", ugly or have very low
self esteem. Bro, if you're not bad looking, package
yourself and watch things change.
That girl wey you dey buy BB porch for still get guys wey
dey straff her for free!!. Don't be a maga, use that money
take package yourself. Even if you spend, it's gonna be very little and for very important reasons.
I hear guys dey shout say the key to naija girls na money
but na pure lie! Be wise. Girls also like sweet-talkers, tell
her whatever she loves to hear. If she finds you
attractive, the only thing you gotta spend on her is time
and maybe a little cash.
4). SINGLE MINDSET:
In Nigeria, the relationship world is a fairly tale. A pipe
dream. Most of the relationship na pure wash. They
might feel we are in a relationship but in my mind I'm
single. If you have this mindset, you would worry less
and give her freedom.
Girls love freedom, they hate an over suspicious/nagging
guy.
The level of cheating nowadays is hilarious. Brothers,
stop putting your hearts in every relationship cuz only
like 0.5% of Nigerian girls are trustworthy.
They are scarce, Be wise. Your girlfriend fit get like 5
other bad guys wey dey service am. I dey laff you!!. You
nor dey see wetin dey happen for our social media?. Na
only you like to straff abi? Hahaha!
5) BACK-UP PLANS:
omoh its good to have at least at 4 or 5 girlfriends in
this computer age oh. I pity guys wey dey form "I'm
faithful" to one. Bro, that your "faithful" girl might be
fvcking other dudes.
That's why she breaks your heart: stup.id murdafucka.
Abi na spirits get all these girls wey I dey sexvice?. I dey
laff. When you have enough girls, no one of them can
deeply hurt you. It's easy, you just pick the next best
one and in a few days all that memories of your ex is
swept clean. Move on, you st.upid murdafucka. Stop
catching feelings, that's a bit:ch @ss trait.
6) DOG-EAT-DOG-WORLD:
No matter how attractive and hot you are, there's always
someone out there that could outshine you. But it's cool.
Its a dog eat dog world. If a hotter/ richer guy snatches
my girls attention, I wouldn't care deep cuz I know I got
more and I'd still attract someone else's girlfriend
too!.... And the circle continues. That's how it goes, no
hard feelings.
7) BED CHAMPION:
Sorry, I cant teach you this but its important. Learn to be
a giant at it, be the best you can be. Them like am die. If
you're good, she would keep coming back.
I Don show with more points oh!
SCARCITY:
Naija girls are confused by nature. So confusion na another way to use follow them. Naija girls like guys wey no send them too much, as in guys wey dey show small affection but wey still no dey available.
Let me give an example. At the 1st-2nd week of meeting, the calls you make to her will interest her. Fine. But If you call naija babe too much (let's say 2 or 3 times per day), a time will come when she no go dey pick your call.
That call wey you dey see as "caring" and "romantic" she dey see am as "disturbance". Even if na missed called, she no go even flash or call you back.
That time u Don too make yourself available, you value Don dey fall. Meanwhile e get another Guy wey if she see him call she go shout "oh my God!, its emeka!". If na missed call, she go call emeka back sharpaly. That na because emeka dey scarce.
If you dey always go visit her, one day she dey house but she go tell you say she go ikeja. Hahaha! Na Jonzing tinz o. Same thing goes for chatting: bbm, whatsapp, FB.
Try dey scarce up sometimes, she go miss u small. This point is on the assumption that she finds you attractive and likes you oh when you first met. Because a girl wey no like you go dey jonz you like this from day one.
QUIETNESS:
Another secret be say girls like quiet guys! I swear!!. Quietness dey confuse them, e dey trip them. Unless you dey very funny then you fit talk but on the average.
If you be type wey dey talk like parrot, she go tire for you quick oh. The more you talk, the more your value dey drop. She no go even let you meet her friends cuz you go fall her hands flat.

TALK SEX: if you plan on straffing her, then you must give her clues long before the time arises. No be say you go tell her say "I want to have sex with you" oh!.
I mean during your normal discussions, try and chip in sex talks and be a little nasty. E.g Tell her say her nyash make Sense. She go code say ur head is there.
Some girls are bad but they hide it, it's your job to bring out that nasty side of her. It might not go too well at first but later you go blend am in and At least make she no say your head dey there.
Later on you go dey use joke tell her say you go like straff her. If you be pro for sweet talk, e get the kind things about sex wey you go tell her wey go make her dey look forward to the straffing day.
Any day you invite her over, her mind go dey there and anything you try wouldn't come as a surprise. This way you stand a better chance of straffing because she already know say na baddo you be before she agree to come see you.
Whereby you dey form pastor since and suddenly you come try touching or straffing, the shock wey she fit display go scatter everything. Hahaha! Shame go catch you and Some no go even come near you again.
N/B: don't be foolish bro, always keep a good girl and if
possible, wife her. They are extremely scarce in naija so
you must hold on and never let go if you find her. A wise
Guy can identify a good girl. I met one during my youth
service but sadly, she was married. Morals, soul, beauty,
brains: A perfect woman. Until I find her, I shall keep
pimping these bit:ches.

I just dey smile, dey look, dey think.

Her thing, her bis, her body.

Luxiana19: Hi Nlanders! Season's greetings y'all.

I want to share what happened just yesterday with u guys.

My friend and I are on Nairaland and we know each others usernames. Well ystdae she was spending Christmas Eve with her boyfriend at his house. Her bfs mum sent him on an errand while she waited for him at home. They were actually using the family computer to watch a movie together before he left so she was alone with the computer after he left. She decided to pause the movie for him and browse through nairaland instead.

Someone was logged into nairaland on the computer. She knew he wasn't the one because she'd asked him before and he said just wanted to sign up one of these days.

Anyway she identified the owner of the profile to be her boyfriend's dad. The username was soo familiar so she went back to her fone and logged into NL politics section.

Lo and behold, she and that username (bf's dad) had once disagreed over something on a thread which had actually blown over to become a full fledged war with name calling and everything.

She traded insults with her bfs dad unknowingly.

Immediately, she called me because her brain just shut down then. I just told her to turn off the system and give her bf's a big excuse and run!!

Right now, she doesn't know to look at her bf's dad without cringing inwardly.

she asked me to post this with my account cuz if she does with hers, her bf's dad may recognize her.

What should she do?

And she thinks his Dad won't read this. If she could do that to a man she doesn't know on forum like this, which I believe is meant to be a social one without thinking twice, I doubt if she worth the stress. (Although u didn't disclose to us what lead to their insult).