₦airaland Forum

Raxxye:
Me tired of marriage for a different reason; my wife nags the daylight out of me and she doesn't have respect for me!
I'm just tired!

I don't like to do this but I set ultimatum...if things don't change, find a means of income and stay away for awhile.

Ninobraw:
No need for a long story, I got married 2 yrs ago, during our friendship I mean courtship it was very sweet and lovely, we got married 2 yrs ago and I have 1 kid.

The problem I have is that, the girl's family come to greet almost every time and when they come they eat like elephant, anything eatable they eat it, they don't use eyes to see bread tea or butter in my room, they will finish it within a day, I will end up spending a lot during the time, when I noticed that it becomes offen i started telling my wife that I am broke, I don't have money. Although my wife is very nice she earns salary of 40k a month, and do funds and cook many times with her money.

Before now I was it okay, we are like a family, now i just realized that it is making me not think straight within a week oil and cooking things we bought will just finished the cartoon of indomitable that last the 2 of us before 1 month or month plus will just finish within 4 days of thier stay, some time 3 of her family will come once and another set will come again, my wife is the first daughter, the poor parents gave birth to 9 kids all in the name of looking for a boy, so she said although the 2 boys are number 7 and 9 position, her parents should be around man 60s and the woman 45yrs old. so now I am tired of the marriage, I don't know how to talk to my wife about it, that I don't like how thier family do come offend since we got married, my families has never come to sleep over in my place for a night talkless of spending holiday in my place my parents gave birth to only 3 of us 2 boys 1 girl.

Now i am just tired I can't be responsible for someone else burden why give birth to many kids and unable to train them, i plan to have only 2 or 3 kids only, and her family want to make me be like thier father sitting at home doing nothing depending on pension for survival, i have realized that I can't achieve what i should have achieved if i continue life this way.

Before our marriage, we agreed no family members is coming to stay with us, the issue now is they don't stay but come to eat and go, it's a big cheating to me I am tired for real, even if I say I don't have money and she use her own. The money should have be able to do other important thing . She spending is also affecting me a lot, we should have been able to buy land or car or live well, not feeding battalion. I am tired please I need advice on what to do.

Baba na Woman get house. In as much as u want peace to reign. Don't tell her use brain follow her. If na ur siblings de come house. She go use u purse dem. Women get sent pass men for marriage matta

mu2sa2:
Op, you chose to marry the firstborn of a poor family consisting of a litter of nine kids (wow, plus mum and dad that's a complete mix football team). As things stand, you're their benefactor. May God be your helper in shouldering the responsibilities of a family you voluntarily married into.

This is part of the reason I always tell my friends that there is more to love than just saying I LOVE YOU to each other.

I remember a man once told me that if you're the first born, don't ever marry a first born too.
You're a young guy still coping with life and you went to marry another first born that is not buoyant.

Man, you're inviting trouble, because you will later become an enemy.

He categorically stated his inlaws were poor and the dad was on a small pension with many kids. So it's not gluttony when they're genuinely hungry


Isaiah 58:10
Feed the hungry,
    and help those in trouble.
Then your light will shine out from the darkness,
    and the darkness around you will be as bright as noon


As for the personal jab, I live in oyinbo land, were food is a none issue, you don't even visit without calling. If YOU are hungry I'll gladly feed you

duality:
It's irresponsibility for you to be jumping from house to house because of food. Be it your sister's house.

I just hope you don't fall into that irresponsible category.

You that want to pass your long throat burden to another man, should go and work, so you can feed yourself and family too.

Throwing the word "poverty" at someone who has provided for the needs of his family but is uncomfortable with external excesses and gluttony , is wrong and reckless.

People should stop being burdens to others.

Proverbs 23:2 says And put a knife to thy throat, if thou be a man given to appetite.


It's not Poverty, it's gluttony. Those jumping at people's pot of food, should pray that they be blessed and be able to comfortably feed themselves and others.

Blackmailing people because you want them to feed you is plain stupid in all ramifications.

Not Poverty.

okoroemeka:
poverty is too bad,it will make you behave abnormal and think weird things,what better joy will a man have if his in-laws come to his place and he will feed them very well and even given them transport money when going,when my in-laws use to come to my house I usually prepare nsala soup myself for them with catfish and oldlayers,poverty it shall not be well with you.

Poverty in Christ is better than ritual (Anambra money, that's wat we call it den)

Slimdan360:
Stop being a selfish and stingy person,the more u give,the greater u receive,know this and know peace

How is managing your limited resources for your family and not feeding extra mouths regularly being stingy.

okoroemeka:
poverty is too bad,it will make you behave abnormal and think weird things,what better joy will a man have if his in-laws come to his place and he will feed them very well and even given them transport money when going,when my in-laws use to come to my house I usually prepare nsala soup myself for them with catfish and oldlayers,poverty it shall not be well with you.

This is not about poverty. The man is being cheated by his wife's family.

I am curious sha

If the man is 60 something and the wife is 45, how old was the wife when he married.

How old is your wife.

How old are her siblings.?

Na you see trouble carry your head put. What did you expect.

My aunty marry big man. Make I no chop on top her head.

udemzyudex:
This is part of the reason I always tell my friends that there is more to love than just saying I LOVE YOU to each other.

I remember a man once told me that if you're the first born, don't ever marry a first born too.
You're a young guy still coping with life and you went to marry another first born that is not buoyant.

Man, you're inviting trouble, because you will later become an enemy.

The real issue is that men don't marry high-flying Women.
They just fall in love with anybody and marry and then suffer the consequences.

Women always marry up, men should start doing the same.

If a woman does not have a job that pays her six figures, don't marry her.

You need that income in your marriage.

this is why you should never marry from a poor home. or a first daughter no matter how pretty the lady is . cos at the end na you go suffer to provide until you die prematurely she will hop on another dick forget you fast.

Successmind:
I laugh like lion.

Laugh like Elephant.

Kobicove:
He buys the food with money!

No doubt. Doesn't justify him calling his in-law poor and showing them disgust . If he was rich, he won't open this thread. Same in-law he said waits on pension, saw his daughter through school. If not, she won't be earning money for groundnut oil, Noodles and butter

generalwo:
... . I used to earn N13k back in the days as a school teacher and my gf was with me for a year in my 2 bedroom and one living room apartment.... Her 4 younger siblings were with me for a whole year..... The only thing I didn't pay for them was school fees.. Feeding, clothing and medicine all me...... Reason we broke up was when I found out that 2 of the kids inside were her biological kids and their father was a dreaded cultist and he called me several times to release his kids or he will report me to the police that I kidnapped his kids...... I'm not saying what they are doing is appropriate but all I'm saying is that he should place himself in the woman's shoes..... If he sees or hear her telling such a story and using such remarks about his family, will he feel great? There are better ways to resolve the issue...... People who HVe stayed married for long have seen much worse and they stormed through it..... I don't subscribe to the idea of calling off the marriage because of his food his inlaws are eating.... It doesn't sound right to me..... U don't expect the woman to turn down her family when she's more or less like a bread winner to them...... Whether we like it or yes, she's still loyal to her family to a great extent....

You are right from your point of view but you have to also understand that op has the right to breath out. Do you know that many people die silently because they keep holding back issues like this and refused to share it with others? I bet that op will sleep better today going through most of the comments, both the ones that support him and those against him. If you are not in that position, you won't understand how great it feel to just speak out, even if the response is not as expected, it doesn't matter

Asquare84:
Op your case is even better that your wife is bringing something to the table, as I type this I am the soul provider for the family, I mean even common salt I buy, wife doesn't do anything thing as I am typing this her younger brother who is managing with a salary of 30k impregnate a lady and she was operated through CS, her mom on hearing this came to my house with two of her children age 14 and 9. Not minding the ungrateful wife that I will give money to stock foodstuffs she will be complaining money is not enough yet she will not provide anything, she nagg alot and no respect for me. It very wrong to Marry from a poor family background.

Men are de cause. If we consider marrying de way women marry, things will be better. Women consider money first b4 anything. Only in Abuja n Lagos I see men doing it. Besides all women are beautiful with make ups. De beauty of a lady should not be priority.
I no no y poor men pikin Sabi fine.

If your fiancee or girlfriend does not have a good job or atleast impeccable future prospects, that is an invitation to marital frustration.

Many women have good prospects. Na your fellow men dey marry Dem.

No go dull yourself o.

Solatium:
MOVE FAR AWAY FROM THEM then your problem will be 80% solve

Fa fa fa, fao

Bigdik70inch2:
No joor......
She's from enugu......

How u take know. B4 for my are na Anambra mad Enugu de born too much for Jos way I de. Dem de born 8,9,10.meself I be Enugu we de 9. 5 boys4 gals. But en easy for us cus my papa na business man

Ninobraw:
No need for a long story, I got married 2 yrs ago, during our friendship I mean courtship it was very sweet and lovely, we got married 2 yrs ago and I have 1 kid.

The problem I have is that, the girl's family come to greet almost every time and when they come they eat like elephant, anything eatable they eat it, they don't use eyes to see bread tea or butter in my room, they will finish it within a day, I will end up spending a lot during the time, when I noticed that it becomes offen i started telling my wife that I am broke, I don't have money. Although my wife is very nice she earns salary of 40k a month, and do funds and cook many times with her money.

Before now I was it okay, we are like a family, now i just realized that it is making me not think straight within a week oil and cooking things we bought will just finished the cartoon of indomitable that last the 2 of us before 1 month or month plus will just finish within 4 days of thier stay, some time 3 of her family will come once and another set will come again, my wife is the first daughter, the poor parents gave birth to 9 kids all in the name of looking for a boy, so she said although the 2 boys are number 7 and 9 position, her parents should be around man 60s and the woman 45yrs old. so now I am tired of the marriage, I don't know how to talk to my wife about it, that I don't like how thier family do come offend since we got married, my families has never come to sleep over in my place for a night talkless of spending holiday in my place my parents gave birth to only 3 of us 2 boys 1 girl.

Now i am just tired I can't be responsible for someone else burden why give birth to many kids and unable to train them, i plan to have only 2 or 3 kids only, and her family want to make me be like thier father sitting at home doing nothing depending on pension for survival, i have realized that I can't achieve what i should have achieved if i continue life this way.

Before our marriage, we agreed no family members is coming to stay with us, the issue now is they don't stay but come to eat and go, it's a big cheating to me I am tired for real, even if I say I don't have money and she use her own. The money should have be able to do other important thing . She spending is also affecting me a lot, we should have been able to buy land or car or live well, not feeding battalion. I am tired please I need advice on what to do.

Be grateful to God for providing for you, end that thought bro

If you stay in a rented apartment I will suggest you move out and stay far away from your mother in law and the rest of the family.

Asquare84:
Op your case is even better that your wife is bringing something to the table, as I type this I am the soul provider for the family, I mean even common salt I buy, wife doesn't do anything thing as I am typing this her younger brother who is managing with a salary of 30k impregnate a lady and she was operated through CS, her mom on hearing this came to my house with two of her children age 14 and 9. Not minding the ungrateful wife that I will give money to stock foodstuffs she will be complaining money is not enough yet she will not provide anything, she nagg alot and no respect for me. It very wrong to Marry from a poor family background.

I feel bad for you.

CSTRR:
You need to wage war against poverty.
That is the real problem.

China Achebe said in his book that when kinsmen visit at night, it is not because they cannot see the moon in their own compound.

Ask God to enlarge your coast and then work towards it.

Food is too small to cause this kind of frustration.

Those saying food is too small, e be like una never enter market this period, the only thing yet to increase in price is petrol.

I know a few women that have carried their husbands to Canada permanently on the back of their certificates and training.

That is what we call WIFE.

No be just to fucckkk and born.

Your topic should have been [/b]I'm tired of poverty[b] not [/b]I'm tired of my marriage[b].
The problem I have with you is the way you just insulted your wife and her family. So because of food you made people trash your wife and her family in a public forum? You're simply [/b] EVIL[b]

MrMcJay:
Very simple solution.

1 Go to Oyingbo market and buy a big bag of unpeeled Egusi.

2 When next they come to your house, put off the TV, say something like 'Aunty Chizoba and Uncle Pius, when you finish eating, help me peel small egusi".

3 Use paint rubber and pack a heavy heap of egusi in front of them let them peel.

Sit back, relax and see what God will do.

This Manchy here deserves an award from Nairaland this 2021.

I know say many of our ladies go dey swear for me right now.

I am covered with the blood of Jesus.

Did you marry their daughter or did you Inherit their burdens? You have right to help them via your wife but don't allow them to cross line because the weather don red everywhere. Let everybody know that things are hard and things ain't flowing as it used to. You had been good to them if not more than good. Discuss with your wife, so that they can give you a breathing space abeg. We love to marry beautiful ladies but not marrying their family burdens or taking over their family burdens as our inheritance.

Park to a new location

Ninobraw:
No need for a long story, I got married 2 yrs ago, during our friendship I mean courtship it was very sweet and lovely, we got married 2 yrs ago and I have 1 kid.

The problem I have is that, the girl's family come to greet almost every time and when they come they eat like elephant, anything eatable they eat it, they don't use eyes to see bread tea or butter in my room, they will finish it within a day, I will end up spending a lot during the time, when I noticed that it becomes offen i started telling my wife that I am broke, I don't have money. Although my wife is very nice she earns salary of 40k a month, and do funds and cook many times with her money.

Before now I was it okay, we are like a family, now i just realized that it is making me not think straight within a week oil and cooking things we bought will just finished the cartoon of indomitable that last the 2 of us before 1 month or month plus will just finish within 4 days of thier stay, some time 3 of her family will come once and another set will come again, my wife is the first daughter, the poor parents gave birth to 9 kids all in the name of looking for a boy, so she said although the 2 boys are number 7 and 9 position, her parents should be around man 60s and the woman 45yrs old. so now I am tired of the marriage, I don't know how to talk to my wife about it, that I don't like how thier family do come offend since we got married, my families has never come to sleep over in my place for a night talkless of spending holiday in my place my parents gave birth to only 3 of us 2 boys 1 girl.

Now i am just tired I can't be responsible for someone else burden why give birth to many kids and unable to train them, i plan to have only 2 or 3 kids only, and her family want to make me be like thier father sitting at home doing nothing depending on pension for survival, i have realized that I can't achieve what i should have achieved if i continue life this way.

Before our marriage, we agreed no family members is coming to stay with us, the issue now is they don't stay but come to eat and go, it's a big cheating to me I am tired for real, even if I say I don't have money and she use her own. The money should have be able to do other important thing . She spending is also affecting me a lot, we should have been able to buy land or car or live well, not feeding battalion. I am tired please I need advice on what to do.

Poverty is your problem
Poverty is bad
O di very bad.God punish Poverty
Blame Buhari not your inlaws

flokii:
@OP the gobe wey you enter tie wrapper

Typical caae of buy 1 get 8 free.. they even do shift to come and consume your consumables. It is well

Hahah no be small buy 1 get 8 free ...make oo get patience small husbands go come for the rest of them

All of you suggesting he should relocate like its one easy thing. Please learn how to clear people. Especially when it brings discomfort. Things are expensive and your wife should know better. Call her and her family to order since she can't take the initiative to do so

MrMcJay:
Very simple solution.

1 Go to Oyingbo market and buy a big bag of unpeeled Egusi.

2 When next they come to your house, put off the TV, say something like 'Aunty Chizoba and Uncle Pius, when you finish eating, help me peel small egusi".

3 Use paint rubber and pack a heavy heap of egusi in front of them let them peel.

Sit back, relax and see what God will do.

you don kolo