Iyaebe:
I never did and he still ask me till date what he ever did to me.I hate it when someone think he's smart and can play on people's intelligence so I turned the table on him and left without taking a second look.

This life.. hmm

Iyaebe:
He brought game into it because he somehow knew I was naive and innocent, of course he knew I like him and was true to him. I guess he wanted to taste the waters while stringing me along and since I wasn't ready for any game I simply walked out without unnecessary drama and didn't want any form of apologies from him.I knew earlier in life never to put my brains behind me when dealing with men and my emotions, if I smell insincerity from a man I simply take my leave and I don't give second chances because men don't truly change they only grow smarter.

Who is naive that knows she's naive fgs? You're far from being naive if you think you are. You're not naive, you were just playing game. Plus you never loved him, you're just a breakup waiting to happen. Keep taking your leaves while the ovation is still loud. Like I said earlier, God will help you take your leave to a better opponent or better still be jumping from from one to another till the world ends.

op has been dodging the cheating question, babe found out and moved on that's my thought

LOGICALKEN:

She has never ask of anything financially from me that I didn’t do. I may not be too rich but I am comfortable

Not that. Better Money brother, not 100k

Iyaebe:
He brought game into it because he somehow knew I was naive and innocent, of course he knew I like him and was true to him. I guess he wanted to taste the waters while stringing me along and since I wasn't ready for any game I simply walked out without unnecessary drama and didn't want any form of apologies from him.I knew earlier in life never to put my brains behind me when dealing with men and my emotions, if I smell insincerity from a man I simply take my leave and I don't give second chances because men don't truly change they only grow smarter.

Bravo!!! Now that you have figured ALL that out, go and cash the CHEQUE. The realization, unfortunately will be the beginning of your relationship troubles. The beauty of being in an intimate liaison with someone else is to always think of what best to make the union improve, when it becomes a contest of wits then its a COMPETITION. When you win one, you lose another till it exhausts your MORALITY.

Polyol:


Who is naive that knows she's naive fgs? You're far from being naive if you think you are. You're not naive, you were just playing game. Plus you never loved him, you're just a breakup waiting to happen. Keep taking your leaves while the ovation is still loud. Like I said earlier, God will help you take your leave to a better opponent or better still be jumping from from one to another till the world ends.

You just want to shift the blame on me because I didn't let a man manipulate and drag me into an emotional wreck and torture. Yes I'll keep taking my leave till I find the right person but I will never tolerate some bullshits all in the name of love.If two people decide to be together then let them be true to themselves, the foundation of every relationship matters a lot and there are flaws you shouldn't overlook so as to avoid stories that touch in marriage. I don't jump from one to the other but my dumping game is top notch when necessary, nothing like a second chance in my world.

Tloc:


Bravo!!! Now that you have figured ALL that out, go and cash the CHEQUE. The realization, unfortunately will be the beginning of your relationship troubles. The beauty of being in an intimate liaison with someone else is to always think of what best to make the union improve, when it becomes a contest of wits then its a COMPETITION. When you win one, you lose another till it exhausts your MORALITY.

You obviously don't get my points, do you? or do you advise I let someone play on my intelligence and emotions all in the name of relationship? not marriage ooo hmm

Iyaebe:
You just want to shift the blame on me because I didn't let a man manipulate and drag me into an emotional wreck and torture. Yes I'll keep taking my leave till I find the right person but I will never tolerate some bullshits all in the name of love.If two people decide to be together then let them be true to themselves, the foundation of every relationship matters a lot and there are flaws you shouldn't overlook so as to avoid stories that touch in marriage. I don't jump from one to the other but my dumping game is top notch when necessary, nothing like a second chance in my world.

I'm sorry if it seems I'm blaming your breaking up with him, of course he doesn't deserve you and breaking up was necessary.

What I'm attacking is your keeping the reason for breakup from him. And oh yes, your dumping GAME is top notch. I knew this more than you know already, it was all games in the first place. You never loved him, you'll help him be a better person by telling him why you had to leave and not go about bragging about how you left him clueless. There's this satisfaction you get leaving your men clueless and you couldn't hide it on this thread. It doesn't make you smarter, it can only increase your body count.

LOGICALKEN:
So I met this lady in 2019 through a mutual friend, after few weeks of getting to meet her we started dating. She is 29 and I’m 31. She’s based in Benin where she works and I am in Lagos, the agreement was that after our wedding she will join me in Lagos which she agreed. Our relationship has been going on smoothly which made me do the introduction January this year and I’ve told her the wedding will be by January next year, which she knows I am making adequate preparation to that effect. I even had to get involved in a monthly contribution of 30k which is done in her workplace, I told her she should collect 2 slots so we can save enough for the wedding . She has never made any financial request that i did not grant, just two months ago she started acting all weird, I have asked her what the problem was and she would say nothing. She stopped picking my calls and told her parents I offended her, I called her to know what my offense was and she said I should forget. God knows I have never deliberately done anything to upset her. Just yesterday morning she called to tell me she is done with the relationship which left me so confused and devastated. I have already paid for cow and all the wines we will use for the wedding and now she has called it off. Please nairalanders what could possibly be my offense? I have thoroughly searched my heart and I can’t seem to remember when I offended her.

Did you make any effort to collect the contributions you are making towards the wedding from her? If yes, thank your star and move on, seems she meet a guy doing better than you.

Polyol:


I'm sorry if it seems I'm blaming your breaking up with him, of course he doesn't deserve you and breaking up was necessary.

What I'm attacking is your keeping the reason for breakup from him. And oh yes, your dumping GAME is top notch. I knew this more than you know already, it was all games in the first place. You never loved him, you'll help him be a better person by telling him why you had to leave and not go about bragging about how you left him clueless. There's this satisfaction you get leaving your men clueless and you couldn't hide it on this thread. It doesn't make you smarter, it can only increase your body count.

Body count?my only body count will be my lawfully wedded husband so don't even go there.I don't want unnecessary drama and apologies reason why I just blanked him,its my own little way of getting back at him.It's his parent's work to groom him into a better person and not mine to do and yes I don't love without my brain in its full action.

LOGICALKEN:
So I met this lady in 2019 through a mutual friend, after few weeks of getting to meet her we started dating. She is 29 and I’m 31. She’s based in Benin where she works and I am in Lagos, the agreement was that after our wedding she will join me in Lagos which she agreed. Our relationship has been going on smoothly which made me do the introduction January this year and I’ve told her the wedding will be by January next year, which she knows I am making adequate preparation to that effect. I even had to get involved in a monthly contribution of 30k which is done in her workplace, I told her she should collect 2 slots so we can save enough for the wedding . She has never made any financial request that i did not grant, just two months ago she started acting all weird, I have asked her what the problem was and she would say nothing. She stopped picking my calls and told her parents I offended her, I called her to know what my offense was and she said I should forget. God knows I have never deliberately done anything to upset her. Just yesterday morning she called to tell me she is done with the relationship which left me so confused and devastated. I have already paid for cow and all the wines we will use for the wedding and now she has called it off. Please nairalanders what could possibly be my offense? I have thoroughly searched my heart and I can’t seem to remember when I offended her.

A richer guy is ontop her matter. Just move on

[url][/url]

Iyaebe:
Body count?my only body count will be my lawfully wedded husband so don't even go there.I don't want unnecessary drama and apologies reason why I just blanked him,its my own little way of getting back at him.It's his parent's work to groom him into a better person and not mine to do and yes I don't love without my brain in its full action.

Oh I see the picture clearer now. He deserves better. He actually dumped you and not the other way round like you made me believe. Forget the calling to ask you why you had to leave him, he doesn't want you anymore. I'm speaking his mind.

For me, I can't even date you talk more of saying I cheated on you. In a world of looking sexy on the street, pepper them gang and the rest, you'll now keep me from having sex? No na. Or do you pay his bills? Like do you cloth, house and feed him? What is that that you do for him that his mum or sister can't do for him? You should know better, he left you. You didn't leave him.

Will you want the same fate for him if he's your brother? You people have mind o, you're even bragging that you left him clueless and you don't give second chance, lol. Will the second chance change anything? Please allow him love whoever she is he cheated on you with. I'll have problem with him if he doesn't appreciate his newly found love more than he has ever thought of loving you.

God will provide you a simp and pray his family members will simp like him too cos I can't imagine you being dumped cos some people perceived you to have used juju to tie their son in the name of marriage.

cruzita:
Hallelujah somebori
My brother in the Lord...God just saved u from karashika....
Smile for Jesus loves u
Bring the cow here for thanksgiving

Polyol:
[url][/url]

Oh I see the picture clearer now. He deserves better. He actually dumped you and not the other way round like you made me believe. Forget the calling to ask you why you had to leave him, he doesn't want you anymore. I'm speaking his mind.

For me, I can't even date you talk more of saying I cheated on you. In a world of looking sexy on the street, pepper them gang and the rest, you'll now keep me from having sex? No na. Or do you pay his bills? Like do you cloth, house and feed him? What is that that you do for him that his mum or sister can't do for him? You should know better, he left you. You didn't leave him.

Will you want the same fate for him if he's your brother? You people have mind o, you're even bragging that you left him clueless and you don't give second chance, lol. Will the second chance change anything? Please allow him love whoever she is he cheated on you with. I'll have problem with him if he doesn't appreciate his newly found love more than he has ever thought of loving you.

God will provide you a simp and pray his family members will simp like him too cos I can't imagine you being dumped cos some people perceived you to have used juju to tie their son in the name of marriage.

kiki dumped? someone that has refused to let go and move on for over two years now. No man has ever dumped me na me dy do the dumping,so you now concluded because you deduced I wasn't giving him my body so that you will have 'body count' to slut shame me with kikikiki the joke is on you.The SIMP word are mostly used by redpillers but let me shock you that there are ladies that the redpill nuggets or whatever can't work on, if a man dares or try to use the redpill on me I bet you he'll be bruised because kolework.In the game of emotions large percentage of men have never won.

Iyaebe:
Body count?my only body count will be my lawfully wedded husband so don't even go there.I don't want unnecessary drama and apologies reason why I just blanked him,its my own little way of getting back at him.It's his parent's work to groom him into a better person and not mine to do and yes I don't love without my brain in its full action.

Falling in love is a beautiful feeling. I have gone through marriages,had my heart broken,but I never stopped loving.

Are you perfect? We all are born with imperfections.

From your comments,i.am not sure you are capable of giving 50% love.Though I don't know what influenced your mindset towards love, you should let it go and enjoy love.

Kindly move on man.

Believe me, it's not likely to be something you did. Your relationship is too advanced for you to do something that'll break it that she wouldn't reveal to you.

Someone or something else is likely in the picture. Either ways, since she's not willing to say what the problem is, save yourself further emotional and financial troubles and move on.

PS even If she comes back,mandate her to reveal what the problem was as a prerequisite to comttiue the relationship.

tommy589:


Falling in love is a beautiful feeling. I have gone through marriages,had my heart broken,but I never stopped loving.

Are you perfect? We all are born with imperfections.

From your comments,i.am not sure you are capable of giving 50% love.Though I don't know what influenced your mindset towards love, you should let it go and enjoy love.

You wrong, my type is one who gives 100% love hence the reason I'm always extra careful and at alert so as not to love the wrong person.

Sonnobax15:

Na wa oh....

But bros op, what if this whole thing should turn out to be a blessing in disguise.... Sometimes God works in mysterious ways that may seem too difficult for us to comprehend.....

Like my dad always tell me--"that a woman who has set her heart to depart a man, there's nothing the man'll do that'll make her change her mind".........

Well,it's very obvious she has found another nigha cha...Very obvious.... The same thing happened to my friend one time ago.....The other bigha disappointed her las las and she came back to my friend....The part that really got me angry was that he accepted her back.......Love is blind cha..

u are right.

Iyaebe:
Were you cheating and you thought its hidden and she'll never find out? I dumped someone like that without ever telling him what he did,he can never imagine how I found out he was cheating with someone in his location.

How madam? He said he hasn't consciously offended her and you're talking cheating, haba?


@LOGICALKEN
I've been through worse the only things I'll tell you is to never force anything to work, it takes two willing adult to make any love relationship work, like someone said a broken relationship is better than a broken marriage. It will hurt a lot but take time to heal, and if you're on the same page with God, believe me you would be glad you held on to him, he'll wipe your years of "waste" in ways you can't imagine.

Don't bother about the shame and what people would say, let them say. It's far more important to be right than to be fast.

Yusufisraelj:


How madam? He said he hasn't consciously offended her and you're talking cheating, haba?


@OP
I've been through worse the only things I'll tell you is to never force anything to work, it takes two willing adult to make any love relationship work, like someone said a broken relationship is better than a broken marriage. It will hurt a lot but take time to heal, and if you're on the same page with God, believe me you would be glad you held on to him, he'll wipe your years of "waste" in ways you can't imagine.

Don't bother about the shame and what people would say, let them say. It's far more important to be right than to be fast.

Can't you see he has been dodging the cheating aspect? men cheat and assume they didn't do anything wrong especially if they believe you can't find out,it might be his ex fiancé found out and silently dumped him.

DaddyRochie1642:
From your story up there, you said that you had already paid for the Cow and Wine.

Since she has called off the Wedding, i strongly suggest you go back there and demand for your hard earned money you used to pay for the Cow and Wine...Collect your money back with a Full Chest and don't look back.


When that girl of yours is serious and ready and her eyes must have cleared then you guys can talk, on no account should you ask what you've done since according to you, you have searched your heart and you can't seem to find anything you have done for her to be acting this way.


From here, I can Smell that you and that your girlfriend don't haven't established Clear Boundaries between the two of you, Establishing Very Clear Boundaries in Relationships is one of the Most Important things ever.

If that girl of yours finally decides to come back, better set and establish clear Boundaries between the two of you.... I'm telling you this for your own good.


The Current Nigeria Economy is very harsh and it Spares no one, for marriage to work nowadays, it takes two Willing partners to make it work, if that girlfriend of yours doesn't contribute anything significant to your Life and you have sincerely searched your heart and you can't seem to find anything you have done wrong to her, give her a Time frame to tell you tell what and how you have offended her and if she doesn't respond during that timeframe you have given her to tell you how you offended her, MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE.

Mehn this is top notch.

Today to slap no hungry you. Lols

Op, I know it's devastating and heartbreaking and though I do not know you? You appear to me like a good person.

The body feels the pain of heartbreak in form of physical pain so be ready to feel a heavy heart, back pain and other funny pains. But they will pass.

Here the things you should do without looking back.

1. Activate no contact. Infact delete her number to avoid dialing it.

2. Don't initiate contact of any kind with her and even if she calls?

3. Don't be at her beck and call, but speak with her when necessary and don't mention the relationship. Be straight and keep it short.

3. Go and collect the stuff from the family including your cow money.

4. Avoid staying alone! Always be around people.

5. Start talking with other girls.

Remember you are a price and other lady will be willing to be with you.

You are a man worthy and deserving of love and respect.

God bless you man.

Op, I know it's devastating and heartbreaking and though I do not know you? You appear to me like a good person.

The body feels the pain of heartbreak in form of physical pain so be ready to feel a heavy heart, back pain and other funny pains. But they will pass.

Here the things you should do without looking back.

1. Activate no contact. Infact delete her number to avoid dialing it.

2. Don't initiate contact of any kind with her and even if she calls?

3. Don't be at her beck and call, but speak with her when necessary and don't mention the relationship. Be straight and keep it short.

3. Go and collect the stuff from the family including your cow money.

4. Avoid staying alone! Always be around people.

5. Start talking with other girls.

Remember you are a price and other ladies will be willing to be with you.

You are a man worthy and deserving of love and respect.

God bless you man.

The more I hear about things like this the more I lose hope in meaningful relationship. OP I feel your pain, especially the money you paid for cow and wine. Girls are slay Taliban, they are terrorizing nice guys like op. Rest in peace for the feelings I ever had for girls.

Iyaebe:
kiki dumped? someone that has refused to let go and move on for over two years now. No man has ever dumped me na me dy do the dumping,so you now concluded because you deduced I wasn't giving him my body so that you will have 'body count' to slut shame me with kikikiki the joke is on you.The SIMP word are mostly used by redpillers but let me shock you that there are ladies that the redpill nuggets or whatever can't work on, if a man dares or try to use the redpill on me I bet you he'll be bruised because kolework.In the game of emotions large percentage of men have never won.

You must be paying his bills then. You better continue what you started before he commits suicide.

For someone who loves you that much that he can't move on from your breakup, he won't dare cheat on you. Can you connect the dots or I need to explain better?

Okay picture it this way: Why will I be finding it difficult to move on from you? It's cos I love and can't do without you. But why will I cheat on you if the previous statements were true? So you see? You're so very much confused as to why you even left him. I can't be hungry if I'm well fed, I can't find sex appeal outside if I'm overwhelmed with the one I already have.

My dear don't deceive yourself, you weren't good enough or you're too good enough that he can't let you go. It depends on the good though. You should be paying his bills or be fvking him real bad. Which points out to one thing, your body count isn't zero just yet.

No, God won't fvck things up by giving you a redpiller, he'll give you simp cos only a simp will comfortably take you in that's if you have zero body count as you claimed. Let's just hope this simp has a family of simps too, it will be a soft landing for you.

Iyaebe:
Can't you see he has been dodging the cheating aspect? men cheat and assume they didn't do anything wrong especially if they believe you can't find out,it might be his ex fiancé found out and silently dumped him.

You may be right and equally wrong.

It looks like you're jumping the gun, fine it's good to be proactive but not see people in the light of what we think, but what there is.

Since he hasn't said that why conclude in that light? More importantly, most men I know don't cheat, bkos I keep a circle of friends with similar values and if you're true, falsehood will always fail around you among other things. But to see people in light of our past experiences is what I'm skeptical about.

LOGICALKEN:
So I met this lady in 2019 through a mutual friend, after few weeks of getting to meet her we started dating. She is 29 and I’m 31. She’s based in Benin where she works and I am in Lagos, the agreement was that after our wedding she will join me in Lagos which she agreed. Our relationship has been going on smoothly which made me do the introduction January this year and I’ve told her the wedding will be by January next year, which she knows I am making adequate preparation to that effect. I even had to get involved in a monthly contribution of 30k which is done in her workplace, I told her she should collect 2 slots so we can save enough for the wedding . She has never made any financial request that i did not grant, just two months ago she started acting all weird, I have asked her what the problem was and she would say nothing. She stopped picking my calls and told her parents I offended her, I called her to know what my offense was and she said I should forget. God knows I have never deliberately done anything to upset her. Just yesterday morning she called to tell me she is done with the relationship which left me so confused and devastated. I have already paid for cow and all the wines we will use for the wedding and now she has called it off. Please nairalanders what could possibly be my offense? I have thoroughly searched my heart and I can’t seem to remember when I offended her.

n d monthly contributions ko, how far

6 Best Mindsets to Have Before Going into a Relationship

Relationships can be quite exhausting with all the requisite obligations that comes with it. If you are going into one, then you should be appropriately prepared. Here are the six best tips to bear in mind before delving into one –

1) Be Ready to Walk Away From it

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https://uptownerd.com/2021/09/03/6-best-mindsets-to-have-before-going-into-a-relationship/

Polyol:



You must be paying his bills then. You better continue what you started before he commits suicide.

For someone who loves you that much that he can't move on from your breakup, he won't dare cheat on you. Can you connect the dots or I need to explain better?

Okay picture it this way: Why will I be finding it difficult to move on from you? It's cos I love and can't do without you. But why will I cheat on you if the previous statements were true? So you see? You're so very much confused as to why you even left him. I can't be hungry if I'm well fed, I can't find sex appeal outside if I'm overwhelmed with the one I already have.

My dear don't deceive yourself, you weren't good enough or you're too good enough that he can't let you go. It depends on the good though. You should be paying his bills or be fvking him real bad. Which points out to one thing, your body count isn't zero just yet.

No, God won't fvck things up by giving you a redpiller, he'll give you simp cos only a simp will comfortably take you in that's if you have zero body count as you claimed. Let's just hope this simp has a family of simps too, it will be a soft landing for you.

Why on earth will I pay a man's bill if I don't demand from him,why?why should I also give my body to someone's son all because of a relationship? do I owe him sex?if a man wants sex let him marry,its that simple. The same you saying these now wanted to slut shame me until I corrected your wrong assumptions. Be forming redpill for all I care there will always be a bbn Ozo and Saga.I have noticed one thing in my little experience and interaction with men,you can have a firm grip on any man as long as you are in full control of your emotions as a lady.

Iyaebe:
Were you cheating and you thought its hidden and she'll never find out? I dumped someone like that without ever telling him what he did,he can never imagine how I found out he was cheating with someone in his location.

Tell us how you found out. Just for knowledge sake, not that I want to learn and be more careful or something like that.

LogicalKen:
If your conscience is clear, cut your loses and move on, don’t go begging and groveling as this will put you in a weaker position even if she changes her mind. Marriage is a serious business and needs the total commitment and consent of you two to succeed.

In the case you decide to cut your loses, you may do well to demand for and make sure to recover the recoverable, especially the 30k monthly contributions you make in her office.

Cheers.

Yusufisraelj:


You may be right and equally wrong.

It looks like you're jumping the gun, fine it's good to be proactive but not see people in the light of what we think, but what there is.

Since he hasn't said that why conclude in that light? More importantly, most men I know don't cheat, bkos I keep a circle of friends with similar values and if you're true, falsehood will always fail around you among other things. But to see people in light of our past experiences is what I'm skeptical about.

Most men don't cheat? ewo!!! please try and be truthful na,it's a faceless forum abi your girlfriend be nairalander?

Iyaebe:
You wrong, my type is one who gives 100% love hence the reason I'm always extra careful and at alert so as not to love the wrong person.

How do you know who the wrong or right person is? I know from the onset of a relationship if a woman is playing me.How sure are you the man you finally chose won't change when married.

Sometimes people change after marriage.Like 10yrs now I have been complaining to my wife (last) of many years that she is not giving me enough sex,she did not change and I started cheating. She was hospitalised when she found out last year. She realised her mistake and I apologised too,we are still in love