erico2k2:

my statement above has no bearing on the basis of me being a man.People need to learn how to support their patner in good and in bad time.The problem of youths theses days is they leap B4 the even think of where they ae going.let me share something with you.my 1st house was built in a land bought by my then gf who is now the mrs.even though bck then she was saving to start her biz..this was money meant 4 that.U have to see the positive on every decision you partner makes as he/she is your primary family now.He did not ise the money to buy car for a side chic it could ha e been worse or spent it on nairabet

Support in good and bad times abi? Ok now, if it was the wife that bought 6 bone straight hair worth millions of naira with fund planned for something else, pls be supportive of her, because same as car, it is an investment that depreciates overtime, will you say same "support in good and bad times"? Hope you won't scream for her to be sent packing because she used part of the money for luxury.

VictorUSA:
Reason she divorce her husband is to be free to do anything with her pussy.

if you were not a goat how is that your business

JovialJune:



Support in good and bad times abi? Ok now, if it was the wife that bought 6 bone straight hair worth millions of naira with fund planned for something else, pls be supportive of her, because same as car, it is an investment that depreciates overtime, make sure you don't scream or send her packing because she used part of your money for luxury.

these ones are goats, they are terrible people who would do the same and hope a woman will be foolish enough to stay and tolerate things that they wouldn't from her

frozen70:


If both of them raised the money for building and he decided to buy the car

If am the woman, I will collect the car and use it for my children

Then go behind him buy a land and start building secretly

This is one of the reasons women builds house without their husband's consent

He just want to show of with the car, whereas accommodation in is what the family need not car

How u go take collect the car? Lol

One of the things to avoid in cases like this is casting aspersion without the full story.

I'm 99% certain the story the OP told isn't complete.
1. We can't verify that they raised the money together.
2. We can't also verify that the man bought a car just to show off.
3. We can't verify that the decision to build a house was a joint one, otherwise, the story would have been to buy a land or something close and not to build a house as speculated.

There are so many plot holes in the story and I must say that it is quite unfortunate that this situation befell that family on a matter that can be settled easily.

There are many questions to ask but I'd just tell you a story.

I know a family personally. Though the husband did not raise the money with his wife, he bought himself a jeep and his wife a clean camry; even when the wife was persistent on building their own house. This continued for many years and the man changed their cars on several occasions but never built a house until a few months ago.
The wife never left her husband on the account that he bought a car instead of building a house, and today, they live in their own duplex in a choice area in Lagos.

Moral of my Story: The situation was not as bad as making divorce the next option.

The man definitely has plans for buying a car instead of building. There are certain places you can't enter or have access to for a job, business or contract except you're mobile; even in some places, the kind of car you bring even matters. This, in my opinion is the kind of man the OP just talked about. I might also be wrong and the man could be an impulse spender. But it's also good to try to look at all the angles before commenting on other people's affairs.


Happy Sunday

ZUBY77:
People are just very stupid. If the kind of job he does require getting a cat,, he doesn't have to wait forever to build a house first. I had like 3 cars while living in a rented house.

Stop asserting that "People are just very stupid." unjustly. There is a difference between your claim and the subject under discussion:

There's everything wrong in reneging your agreement with someone or tricking them into doing your bidding - which is what the subject under discussion portrays;

However,

There's nothing wrong with owning as many personal automobiles as you wish while still living in a rental accommodation, especially if that suits your life circumstances and blueprint - your claim as a case study - provided that you do so with your money and in a good judgement.

Anyone who has been opportune to work and live within a place like Atherton, California will understand why it's very common to see more than 80% of the residents owning some good number of high-end personal automobiles while still living in rental accommodations.

JovialJune:



Support in good and bad times abi? Ok now, if it was the wife that bought 6 bone straight hair worth millions of naira with fund planned for something else, pls be supportive of her, because same as car, it is an investment that depreciates overtime, make sure you don't scream or send her packing because she used part of your money for luxury.

erm I assume I'm talking to an adult with life history here cos I'm struggling to see how human hair equates to a car or for lack of quick thought U could have something else to drive home your point??U cannot earn money with hair but you can with a car.

It depends on the reason he bought the car and the kind of house she wanted.

Buying a car with 2 million for business is wiser than building a house with that 2 million if you're still a tenant.

erico2k2:

erm I assume I'm talking to an adult with life history here cos I'm struggling to see how human hair equates to a car or for lack of quick thought U could have something else to drive home your point??U cannot earn money with hair but you can with a car.

It is an appropriate equation because just like cars, it depreciates, and just like cars, you can resell wigs/hair.

I don't know your gf. I can't comment on whether it was HER choice to give you the money. If it was her choice, this scenario does not apply because it wasn't her choice for him to use the money to buy a car.

It is not possible for a Nigerian woman to leave her husband because of this scenario, there must have been plenty of it. That man must be something else. I am not suggesting that divorce is the answer but I don't know her story and her options.

Bad time is like cancer, job loss not this kimd

erico2k2:

my statement above has no bearing on the basis of me being a man.People need to learn how to support their patner in good and in bad time.The problem of youths theses days is they leap B4 the even think of where they ae going.let me share something with you.my 1st house was built in a land bought by my then gf who is now the mrs.even though bck then she was saving to start her biz..this was money meant 4 that.U have to see the positive on every decision you partner makes as he/she is your primary family now.He did not ise the money to buy car for a side chic it could ha e been worse or spent it on nairabet

The man just wanted to flex. That money was not enough to build soakaway. He just got tired of waiting, saving 10 naira daily

I don't disagree with you on this. For the woman in this story, I am willing to bet that this is the case

tctrills:

That's your opinion that's not what the story says. Again buying a car over a house is not always financially irresponsibility. There are times when It could be more prudent to buy a car and rent an apartment.
I could give you examples where buying a car is better financially

frozen70:


Are we talking about infidelity here or we are talking about an irresponsible man like you, who doesn't have a better plan for his family but to use the family financial plans for his own pleasure just like you

how did u know that he's the one?

ZUBY77:
People are just very stupid. If the kind of job he does require getting a cat,, he doesn't have to wait forever to build a house first. I had like 3 cars while living in a rented house.

So all those years you have been globetrotting, you have 3 cars in each country?

Sterope:
I don't know your gf. I can't comment on whether it was HER choice to give you the money. If it was her choice, this scenario does not apply because it wasn't her choice for him to use the money to buy a car.

It is not possible for a Nigerian woman to leave her husband because of this scenario, there must have been plenty of it. That man must be something else. I am not suggesting that divorce is the answer but I don't know her story and her options.

Bad time is like cancer, job loss not this kimd

well we don't know the other stuff but the agreed stuf is as stated above by the OP so we duel on that gf aha this so called gf has been a wife past 21 years we are awaiting grand kids as we now have a 20 ur old daughter.Fact of the matter is this. its to petty to divorce your man cos he bought a car with both of your money of which u can still enjoy such car.

ObamaMessi:
A woman in the area where I recide reportedly divorced her husband for buying a car instead of building a house.It was said that the divorced husband failed to listen to the wife to build a house and bought a car with the money they both raised.

What is our society turning into?

LadiesForever Jeon

wise women, the husband is an idiot

The husband can never make it, so no need the wife staying with him.
Me wey dey pray make my wife helping me they save

frozen70:


Are we talking about infidelity here or we are talking about an irresponsible man like you, who doesn't have a better plan for his family but to use the family financial plans for his own pleasure just like you

Do you know him?

frozen70:


If that may be the case

The woman knows what to do to him and his senses will reformat

Every woman knows and understands how to handle her spouse

Just followed your comments. My dear it's not the remedy.. she should go somewhere and calm herself downm and come back to her family.

I happened to witness a similar case. The man use money which both him and his wife contributed together to buy a car. He mostly spends his money on car repairs while neglecting his family needs. The woman went ahead to buy her own land and build house. The man packed in with her.

frozen70:


Are we talking about infidelity here or we are talking about an irresponsible man like you, who doesn't have a better plan for his family but to use the family financial plans for his own pleasure just like you

Ha, hope this is not a temper problem. Calm down

To me the solution to this is very simple, take the car from him and sell it. Use the proceed from the sales to build the house, simple.

ObamaMessi:
According to the story, they already have a land.But the man refused to build a house and chose to buy a car living in a renting house.

building a house will cost 5times the cost of buying a car

A car isn't a luxury for a family man

And what is wrong with buying a car first before building a house? Most especially if the car will improve your efficiency and moving around. The truth is, there is more to the divorce than the buying of the car. The wife must have been contemplating leaving and was just waiting for the right time.

frozen70:


She should sell the land and she will use the money to buy another land in her name then build it gradually

That's how they make some women labour in vain and use the money to flex

When the time is running out he will now come to his senses

.....and you will say you are also giving an advice so ooo, a bi?

No, she should divorce him. You wanna be married while disagreeing with your husband and walking a separate path, no way! Do it as a single woman

frozen70:


She should sell the land and she will use the money to buy another land in her name then build it gradually

That's how they make some women labour in vain and use the money to flex

When the time is running out he will now come to his senses

A sign of a rich woman in future..

Ebubu3:
who marry you marry minus 1, normal normal sef you sound frustrated and reek of negative vibe.

When you get married, your spouse will definitely be minus one, then you will become half a man

JovialJune:



You dey ment

xteve:
Akpor!!!

Na real apkor!!!!

Reading through some of the comments on this thread, especially the comments from supposed 'males', I can see how gross foolishness is displayed. A man is a head of the home, no doubt from the story, the money is a joint saving with the wife but have you counted the cost of building a house compared to getting a car "for a start"? Have you asked if they had a car before hand? Well, if they did have a car and the man still bought a new car, was the old car still in a functional state?
Some questions need be asked before jumping into a one-sided conclusion. Yes the lady has divorced the man but this reason the op gave is not reason enough for a reasonable and matured woman to divorce her husband. To me, the woman's action is even more foolish than the action of the man.
Well, one thing in life I've learnt not to do is to really jump into people's family business cause at the end, your comments may be used by the duo when they finally make way around their issues...

!!!Be Wise

When U loose a contract wort 500million naira because U refuse to buy a car worth 2million naira.u will understand.
Women on the short run thinks their ideas are better only for them to realise that on the long-run the man was right.
Anyhu. Thank God she divorce him. A good woman will find him soon.she did well.