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In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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When Will I Find My Soul Mate Or Heart Desire / He Refused To Call Or Ping Me: Nairalanders I Need Your Word Of Advice Pls / Talk Sense Into My Head Plssss... (2) (3) (4)

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Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Beverlyjean(f): 11:18pm On Mar 04, 2015
Doxie69:

From your post Op is an Olosho in the making

You don't have to say that about me , I told you that I am still fresh when it comes to relationships , I don't have friends and my mum and dad monitor me a lot , so I don't no much about boys because I am the only child, I don't have brothers or sisters. I stick to myself most times . The other guy wasn't planned for , it just happened. My fear is that my bf that I luv might end up leaving me if he finds out . I don't want to loose them both

4 Likes

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by condralbede(m): 11:30pm On Mar 04, 2015
am coming,even nah Cambridge examz ,am out of the hall.anyway go for your hrt.you knw both of them more than any of us here.
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by free2ryhme: 11:31pm On Mar 04, 2015
Beverlyjean:
Good day nairalanders , am new on this forum and I actually registered here so that I can get a credible and mature solution to my lingering emotional and relationship problem.

It goes like this; I have a bf that I have been dating for a year now and he is a very wonderful Person, he is my first love and I really love him so much because he gives me a different kind of feeling that I have never felt before , but my dilemma is that I met another guy a month after I accepted to date my bf , we were normal friends for the first one month though I never told him I had a bf until he surprisingly made his intentions known to me . This other guy has been an angel in my life and we started hanging out frequently due to my bf not being around because he traveled out of the country , this other guy has been the most loving and caring guy that I have ever met, he is always there for me and showers me with so much care love and time . He then introduced me to my introduced me to his family ( his mum and dad inclusive) and they loved me at an instant and started welcoming me and calling me their daughter . Now this other guy is 30 while I turned 21 in December and my guy is 23 . This other guy has a great job and ready to settle but his not rushing me saying that he will wait till I am ready . The problem is that I don't have the type of love he wants me to have for him , the thing is that I love my bf so much and I am not ready to let him go . My bf missed my graduation , my birthday and Val's because he had some pressing issues though he sent me my gifts through mail but the other guy was there for me , came for my grad at gwagwalada, took me to a lovely restaurant on my bday and surprised me with a lovely gift and also spent time with me on Val's day and it was so lovely. My bf is around but I see him only 3 times a month and I don't complain but this other guy sees me like 4 times a week .

I have been in a romantic relationship with the new guy although we have done something's apart from direct sex because I am a virgin . This other guy has sacrificed a lot for me but I wanna let him go because he really want me to leave my bf and stay permanently with him , but I love my bf so much and my feeling for him is not strong . He said the reason why I don't love him is because my heart is somewhere else and the moment I leave my bf , I will start loving him as long as I concentrate solely with him.

He also said that even if I leave him and my bf should later find out what I did with him , that my bf will dump me , if not now but later and I will loose the opportunity of everlasting happiness with him ( the other guy)

I care a lot about the other guy and I have feelings for him but I love my bf a lot , even though he loves me more that my bf does.

The other guy also said my bf is still young and might disappoint me in the future . I believe my bf will not because I can guarantee that he is not cheating on me and will not .

The following are the questions that keep on giving me sleepless nights :

1. Will my bf dump me if he eventually finds out bout what I did with the other guy.
2 . Will my bf or me fall out of love as we grow due to the age
3. Am I sure that he is not cheating on me or later leave me for someone else
4. Should I loose my virginity to him to prove my love
5. Will I find another lovin guy like the other guy later in life if my guy leaves me
6 . Will I leave to regret leaving the other guy
7 . Should I follow my heart or head because my heart says my bf but my head says the other guy
8. Will I fall inlove with the other guy if I stop seeing my bf?

Please help me with very mature answers because this will play a vital role in my life in the future .

Ladies that have experienced this come forth and guys that understand the way guys reason should help out pleaseeeee , because am still a novice when it comes to relationship issues. Thank you



The epistle of a confused virgin

3 Likes

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Nobody: 11:32pm On Mar 04, 2015
Its spiritual undecided!
I don tire to dhe hear virgin dis virgin dat, infact, I no wan marry virgin again. Cos I hear say some babe dhe carry pal oil near bed to pour in disguise for dem husband dat nite. Too many olosho claiming virginity, picture of d hymen or I don't believe undecided
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Nobody: 11:35pm On Mar 04, 2015
You don't seem confused to me; you know what your heart wants, follow it!

1 Like

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by afeez5808(m): 11:35pm On Mar 04, 2015
Cracks

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Nobody: 11:36pm On Mar 04, 2015
naijaboiy:
angryangry
if you think you Love two people at once,,choose the second. undecided

Because if you really loved the first you wouldn't have a second option
angry

Confused set of species undecided
choi, you nailed it gbam!

8 Likes

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by itstpia8: 11:36pm On Mar 04, 2015
is the op male or female, didnt read the write up.
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by glorytemdee: 11:38pm On Mar 04, 2015
My dear d earlier d better is gud u called ur bf nw and tell him wat has happened btw u and d oda guy if u really love him and see his reactions,if he accept u hv made a mistk and forgive u babe u r wit d ryt guy bt if is oda way round den u can go fo d oda one,d earlier d better,u hv to tell him urself nw bfo is too late

1 Like

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by sharawwy(m): 11:39pm On Mar 04, 2015
Virgin hmmmm i salute thee.....

1 Like 1 Share

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by snowytee(m): 11:39pm On Mar 04, 2015
Nobody seems to care that she has gotten romantic with the older guy while her boyfriend is patiently waiting and not asking for it.If you smooshed the guy when you still had a boyfriend,you'll surely give the second guy your flower and once that is done,he'll leave you.After he has left you,you'll take your deflowered self to that poor boy that didn't pressure you for it.I wonder how he'll feel.If he cheats with you,he'll cheat on you.

15 Likes

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Jerrick(m): 11:41pm On Mar 04, 2015
How can you be confused on who to settle with?....the question is, who do you really love? From your post, I discovered you prefer the NEW guy.. Follow your heart abeg!
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by OCTAVO: 11:41pm On Mar 04, 2015
No one can answer your questions conclusively cos we don't know tomorrow. You need futuristic answers, which only GOD can provide. Any decision you make today will definitely influence your tomorrow either positively or negatively. Babe, you need only GOD in times like this. Good luck!

1 Like 1 Share

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by acidtalk: 11:41pm On Mar 04, 2015
free2ryhme:


I AM A M00R0N FOR QUOTING THE OP'S WHOLE POST JUST TO TYPE NONESENSE. YES! I AM A M00RON

1 Like 1 Share

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Kentrasso(f): 11:42pm On Mar 04, 2015
I got lost at some point in the middle of the story. My bf, the other guy, I love him, I love him more. My dear you need to sort out yourself first and set your priorities right. What do you want? What are your goals? Have u had a serious talk with these guys and know what their future looks like? You are not too young so make up your mind and stick with the best from your discovery

5 Likes

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Nobody: 11:42pm On Mar 04, 2015
Beverlyjean:


In the beginning , he said I can be with my bf but it seems like he started changing words when my bf missed those dates while he was available but even with that I might wanna be with the one I love
it looks like somebody has already made up her mind
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by JeffreyJamez(m): 11:43pm On Mar 04, 2015
30 yrs old guy wooing a 21 yes old girl....... BIG MISTAKE....make e no go find him mate!!..... and to think he knows she has a bf and still pushing it......the girl sef na wa....better stick with your bf o...or get married to this one and become a slave for the rest of your life..... a whole 9 yrs difference fa!!

8 Likes

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by rad8(m): 11:43pm On Mar 04, 2015
Dear guyz...I take God beg una...run away from girls like this...d day Wey u go travel to go fetch more income for ur family, she go use excuse say u no dey house use find anoda bobo..beware of evil jazebels

15 Likes 3 Shares

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by efonat(m): 11:43pm On Mar 04, 2015
Do girls have brain? I tot its fish brain?
Harbosede02:
Babe,u are confused!!follow ur heart bt take ur brain along
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Bimffo(m): 11:43pm On Mar 04, 2015
Mtchewww.. *Leaves thread*
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by glorytemdee: 11:45pm On Mar 04, 2015
My dear d earlier d better is gud u called ur bf nw and tell him wat has happened btw u and d oda guy if u really love him and see his reactions,if he accept u hv made a mistk and forgive u babe u r wit d ryt guy bt if is oda way round den u can go fo d oda one,d earlier d better,u hv to tell him urself nw bfo is too late,bt dt oda guy is a fool for asking u to leave ur bf fo him,babe use ur head o

2 Likes

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by williamspaul22(m): 11:45pm On Mar 04, 2015
Leave both nd date me tongue
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by JeffreyJamez(m): 11:46pm On Mar 04, 2015
Beverlyjean:


You don't have to say that about me , I told you that I am still fresh when it comes to relationships , I don't have friends and my mum and dad monitor me a lot , so I don't no much about boys because I am the only child, I don't have brothers or sisters. I stick to myself most times . The other guy wasn't planned for , it just happened. My fear is that my bf that I luv might end up leaving me if he finds out . I don't want to loose them both

With the way you're going, You'll end up with the wrong guy.

1 Like

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by free2ryhme: 11:48pm On Mar 04, 2015
acidtalk:
Thanks for sharing my stupidity with the entire forum


grin grin
Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Nobody: 11:48pm On Mar 04, 2015
These hoes Really ain't loyal. U can't stick with your first boyfriend? This is why I don't like Nigerian girls. #Teamforeigngirls.

3 Likes

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by 0malicious(f): 11:48pm On Mar 04, 2015
my advice is this
1. just bear it in mind that you are young, 21 is a young age to talk of marriage.
2. Talk of marriage is not a sign of seriousness, men can talk talk n talk n introduce you to their ancestors but if they're gonna mess u up, they will.
3. Focus on building urself now. this is d most important part of my advice. I swear it can't be over emphasized. as a woman you need to have something going for yourself, have some self worth. forget the love fairy tale bullshit, it doesn't last, what your seeing is jus d welcoming parade. what makes you a real woman is not a mans appreciation but your ability to stand on your own. don't make rships d centre of your life when you ought to focus on harnessing your God given talents.
4. don't take any rship seriously for now unless your ready to get married. stop d activity with d second guy, think about it n realise d guy is selfish in his demands. if you eventually leave ur bf he might lose interest, some men re chasers it would shock you to know what they'd do to get what they want. and no this guy is not too sweet to be like that, open your eyes.
5. sex is just an activity, stop putting too much thought on it. it comes with a lot of baggage that only marriage can handle trust me.
sorry for d long post smiley God bless you.

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Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by GeneralBosco: 11:48pm On Mar 04, 2015
naijaboiy:
you have already done some things with this other guy.

It just remains sex. Only God knows what those things are.

Please just leave that poor boy in abroad alone.

You clearly do not Love him undecided
There are so many hoes in this country.

2 Likes

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by diportivo: 11:48pm On Mar 04, 2015
virgin wey dey double date??u go notorious die wen u start dishing out the congo to be shined grin..obviously love isnt ur motive.if it were u wld be faithful to ur first love.uv crossed the line already....the second guy has swept u off ur feet albeit maturely...he knows what u are lacking and he is using it to get at u.it will take a while for u to realise u shldnt av left ur first love...cos with ur write up,u r all for the second guy already undecided

7 Likes

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by akinsbobo1: 11:49pm On Mar 04, 2015
Concentrate on ur studies and forget about them cos none of dem will marry u. Bitter truth though!

2 Likes

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by Elan83(m): 11:49pm On Mar 04, 2015
U're just lookin 4 an xcuz 2 deflower urslf, ur bf is d ryt psn 2 protct u & mek ur virgnty last longer, cnt u see hw he 's gvn u less atention & romance,not because he dnt luv u but because he dnt wnt u 2 spoil nw,dis is an unconscious natural action dat is very gud 4u,dis 2nd guy wil disvirgn u,mess u up wella & dump u at last, BTW i dnt tnk u're due 4 mrrg,,so stick wt ur bf & lock ur ass 4 nw, u spoiled brat!

15 Likes

Re: In Need Of An Experienced Advice Pls!!! Should I Follow My Head Or Heart by PRECIOUS8844: 11:49pm On Mar 04, 2015
my dear in anytin u do u should apply WISDOM and for it to come seek GOD face, Go for ur heart first. what matters most is ur happiness ok bcus AGE is not a barrier nd can never be ohhhh

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