₦airaland Forum

kathykathy:
itx obvious dat guy is an addict,,,may be his oda kinda girl lfriends were d bicthy kinds,,,nd u may be d best he has eva had or will eva have,,,,u love dis dude according to u,,,u cant jst leave him,,,he doesnt knw he is addicted,,,he feels he is njoying him self,,,u can advice him to go to a rehab,,jst work out something to change him,,,if he changes he wld forever be gratefull to u cos u saved his life,,,for love to be true u have to sacrifce

agarawu23:
she asked for our advice

jumanche:
I met my boyfriend online. We were in a long distance relationship for a 2 months before I moved back to his town.
Before we met, he told me he smoked cigarettes but socially. I was ok with that. I thought that If he needed a cigar to calm his nerves , its alright. I do not smoke.

After we met, It turns out that he's a chain smoker. He takes at least 3 packs of cigarettes a day. After a month of dating him, I just couldn't take it anymore. After we visit each other, I reek of cigarettes. My clothes, my purses, my hair, the bed-sheet. Everything stinks. Sometimes I have to re-do my laundry. He smokes inside the house and car so the smoke is directly on me .

I talked to him about this. I told him that the smoke stinks everywhere up so bad and that I have to wash my clothes after I visit him. He got really mad and we didnt talk for days.

I love my boyfriend but I cannot take the smoking. Its also starting to affect him medically , his teeth is rotten and he coughs chronically. I tell him to stop at least for his health and he starts to give examples of non-smokers who died early or smokers who live long.

I am at my wits end because everything and everywhere stink and cigarette butts are everywhere.

How do I tell him to stop?? Or do you think its time to end the relationship.
My sista u re more health hazard than u realize by hanging around a chain smoker...i live in the us where cigarette smokin is like drinkin water to them, if u see types of cancer n orishi rishi sickness it causes to smokers n none smokers alike, even with all the medical advancement they have..there is high chance ur bf got lung cancer going by the symptoms u mentioned
But i pray God in his infinite mercy will not allow that

vizkiz:
"smokers are liable to die young"

andyanders:
It is hard to control a person who is addicted to drugs.One day, he would start taking hard drugs and would look like Majeke Fashek, then she would come to her senses.

missgray:
yeah she did I was thinking advice comes with convictions?

jumanche:
its even more than 3 packs a day. I said at least 3 packs. We only spend few hours together a day and during that time, which is usually like 5/6 hours, he finishes 2 packs. It may be up to 5 packs a day..

i know i have to leave but i guess i was looking for a way to let him stop.

ehissquare:
To be sincere if I were you i would have already ended the relationship even before coming to NL to seek for opinion unless of course you hv organs to spare incase his own packs up.

CaptPlanet:
I kindda like your attitude about the whole thing. First you have to understand that cigarettes contains nicotine ( the substance that makes it addictive) and it's very difficult to quit so you're in for a huge task

If you really want to help him, I suggest you take some drastic measures.

Let him know that you won't visit him if he'll smoke with you around and if he does, leave his house ASAP/ do things he don't like, if he calls you let him understand that you can't stand the habit and if he really loves you, he should respect you. Deny him candy if u must (men love candy and we'll do anything to get some) That should at least cut down his smoking with you around (it's difficult but you gotta stick with it)

When this starts to work, spend more time with him, he'll reduce the way he smokes and also dispose of every packs of cigarettes around the house. Allow him some space to smoke (he can't quit abruptly)

Talk to him about it all the time, better yet NAG about it, men despise nagging. Get info on the adverse effects of smoking and show it to him, u can get pics of affected lungs off the Internet and show him. It'll stick in his subconscious mind, that should help.

Make him open up to you (men hide alot) esp how his day went, get him to trust you, don't judge him when he tell you difficult stuff, act like it's no biggie, you chics have your way with men so you should know how to get him to release all that worked up stress/emotion from a hard day.

Gradually reduce his average sticks a day (make charts with him), if he burns like 15 sticks a day, you could make it 5 a day if you go about it the right way. You can give him a treat once or twice a month, you know what he likes, like nice meal, warm bath together, seduce the living daylight out of him....use your imagination.

Finally you can get him e- cigarettes , they're healthier and more environment friendly.


PS: get him to eat a lot of fruits, let him go for detox.

I hope this helps.

jazinogold:
lovers of smokers are more liable to die young pls flee from him!






my girlfriend talks too much...so te she dy tell her male friends she's on!
should I breakup with her?






in another news.. .the anointed man of God! A real life changer will be in a location near you for the widely publicized Lagos city wide crusade!!! you cant affordto miss this opportunity to have a divine encounter with God!

PDPwayoo:
stop lying. NOBODY CAN SMOKE 3 PACKETS OF CIGARETTE A DAY. EVEN CHINESE MAN WILL NOT GET TO THAT LEVEL. ONE PACKET OF CIGAR IS 20 STICKS, 3 PACKETS = 60 STICKS.

Normally smokers smoke less if they r with a girl. Smoking 3 packets in your present means he could take 10 packet when he is alone. SISTER STOP LYING.

OLUJOSHINS:
cancer has a funny way of ending relationships like this U knw.



not that I do not wish him well, but 3 packs a day is a first class flight ticket to heaven

naijathings:
this is really painful.
I see you are a respectful babe and you must really love this guy.
we all have something that makes us IMPERFECT but it is sad this is his own ACHILLES HEEL.

You have to understand that your health is very important,
it is true that SOMETHING MUST KILL A MAN but you can avoid some of these killers especially if you are not a smoker and your BF smokes so much and in a way and manner that affects you.

read about SECOND HAND SMOKING
I was watching a documentary sometime ago about how Asian men smoke so much and how it affects their women, there was this woman who said she started falling sick, she went to the hospital and was shocked when the doctor told her that she smokes too much and she needs to quit it. this is a woman that has never lighted one in her life.
The same thing might happen to you if you don't get far from such a guy.

Sometimes, for the GREATER GOOD, sacrifices must be made. So, you tell me, what is the greater good here? your health or him ?

PurestBoy:
No mind the foolish girl, 3 packs a day is a minimum of N600, if you're jobless, you can't afford that, if you have a job, you won't have the chance. I'm a chain smoker and I don't smoke a pack in day except maybe with friends and drinks. A responsible man as the OP portrays the guy will not smoke 2 packs while indoor with his babe.

jumanche:
I met my boyfriend online. We were in a long distance relationship for a 2 months before I moved back to his town.
Before we met, he told me he smoked cigarettes but socially. I was ok with that. I thought that If he needed a cigar to calm his nerves , its alright. I do not smoke.

After we met, It turns out that he's a chain smoker. He takes at least 3 packs of cigarettes a day. After a month of dating him, I just couldn't take it anymore. After we visit each other, I reek of cigarettes. My clothes, my purses, my hair, the bed-sheet. Everything stinks. Sometimes I have to re-do my laundry. He smokes inside the house and car so the smoke is directly on me .

I talked to him about this. I told him that the smoke stinks everywhere up so bad and that I have to wash my clothes after I visit him. He got really mad and we didnt talk for days.

I love my boyfriend but I cannot take the smoking. Its also starting to affect him medically , his teeth is rotten and he coughs chronically. I tell him to stop at least for his health and he starts to give examples of non-smokers who died early or smokers who live long.

I am at my wits end because everything and everywhere stink and cigarette butts are everywhere.

How do I tell him to stop?? Or do you think its time to end the relationship.

vani86:
Op can lie for africa sha, yes he smokes a lot but not as much as 3 packs a day, stop exaggerating, i am a smoker, very very casual smoker, about 3 sticks a day, i wont even smoke on some days.

usually after work, helps me calm down. the gf dont mind at all, she actually joins once or twice.

i admit though, even smoking a pack a day is too much, if you were my sister i will tell you to leave, 2nd hand smoke also affects non smokers

afamjb:
ur boyfriend smokes 3 packs of cigarettes a day wch is =60 sticks, d guy no dey chop food na only to dey smoke he sabi.
Op pls leave him before he smokes u one day.

emmanuel596:
You ar just being stupid....u guys spend 5/6 hours a day no kisses no cuddle u just sit and watch him smoke......today is Monday don't stay dumb forever go get a job

mikeapollo:
So you kiss and lick his rotten teeth?

Kolade354:
Something is wrong with ya Head, Why would you even agree to date a guy that smokes in the first place.........So u cnt see any responsible Dude to date....Ya life ya problem

jumanche:
Actually, my boyfriend is a very good man. He is very down to earth and respectful. He will never ever punch me. He helps around the house, he cooks for himself and even helps do my hair. He is perfect. Its just sad that he has this addiction. Please do not insult him.

This is the reason why I am confused about the smoking because that's his only flaw. Its a really bad flaw but he's a very good man and i wish I could help him.
Is he also rich? Cuz am sure if he was broke u won't even need our advice

missgray:
You know few years ago I would say same thing. Trust me if you are in her shoes u wouldn't say the same thing. I bet if the person in question is your brother, a close relative or even a good friend you won't type this ish. Everybody got their flaws, the guy in question was once an innocent like you probably did what you wrote there but then that's not an excuse to smoke. Most smokers already know all the effects smoking has on them but wouldn't quit. I was stunned when I asked a friend of my that smokes if he has gone for check up, he said " oh yeah my doctor said am fine" .They are addicts that doesn't mean you should hate them, i mean if you love them you should try to make them stop or reduce their intake which isn't easy either way. I think the op already knows what to do cos it's her life and maybe her future we are talking about here.

Benoxvals:
3 sticks or 3 packs a day??unless your bf came back from China where he must have lived for many years and picked up that stupid habit else I don't believe someone can smoke up to 3 packs of cigarette everyday..he should be dead by now.