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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor (43427 Views)
Update: Why I Stuck With This Girl, After Walking Away From 3 Other Ladies. / Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor / It Is Wrong To Ask “how Was Your Night?” – Here’s Why. (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by safarigirl(f): 11:49pm On Jul 12, 2018 |
Recently, George Clooney rewarded his friends with a million dollars. Why did he reward them? Were they doing him a favour being his friends even before he became a big star? Anyone who stuck to you in your trying times deserves to be rewarded. If you have ever had a period in your life when you were down and you needed someone and the whole world abandoned you, leaving you with just one person who stuck by you, none of you would come here to make such ignorant statement about why men reward the women who stick by them Do you know their story? Do you know if these women helped them financially? Do you know how many of these men may have been close to suicide and the woman was the only reason they didn't off themselves? People who kill themselves, you think they would have done that if someone listened to them when they were down and gave them hope? None of you has obviously been down and out, at that point in life that you become a caricature to everyone, including supposed friends and family, because if you have been there, walahi, if you can, you go even buy Banana Island house for the person that held your hand when you were slipping into darkness. If you know how many girls feed guys in school, you will not come here and ask a question as silly as "Did she do him a favour?" Yes! She fed him when he had no food, she gave him words of encouragement when he had no hope, she stood by him when he had no support. She took insults from friends and colleagues because she was the 'stupid' girl who was following the broke boy What is a car compared to years of sacrifice and insult? What is the worth of a car? Do you think a car is even enough to repay someone for being the reason why you were even alive to get these riches? Like I said, let me attribute this talk to common Ignorance. When you are broke and hopeless and only one person has your back, you will understand the men you think are senseless 63 Likes 13 Shares |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by Nobody: 12:38am On Jul 13, 2018 |
safarigirl: You helped from your mind. Those girls don't do any guy a favour by feeding them. They must be rewarded? You kind of feel entitled just like the lady in acrimony. The fools who purchase cars and other stuffs for ladies not because they can afford them but because the ladies stayed with them when they were broke can't purchase cars for their mothers, fathers, brothers and sisters. How many times have ladies purchased cars and gifts for men because the men dated them when they were broke?. Did you even read this your article before posting it? Anybody dating a broke guy is also broke.. So how can you be broke and consider dating a broke person a favour that must be repaid? . The dream is free. 21 Likes |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by safarigirl(f): 12:45am On Jul 13, 2018 |
Hanseel1:I am not speaking from the angle of a lady helping a guy. I am speaking from the angle of a person who has been down and needed help. Like I said, you have never been in that dark place, so, your words are laced with ignorance. When you get there, you can come and converse with us. And the lady in acrimony took things too far, but the man had his faults. The blame was 50-50, once again, as far as that movie goes, I speak from an experience you will never be able to understand because you have not been in that situation obviously, else, you would know that it is suspicious to start a life with the same woman you were accused of cheating with PS: There are well-to-do-girls dating and feeding broke guys. I know many of them in the hostel, they will travel to Dubai finish and come back to be feeding people's sons. They are not broke, they are in love, and sometimes, infatuation. I am just reading ignorance all over your post. Nobody is entitled to anything, it is a show of common appreciation that so many people in the world today are incapable of showing. The real entitled mentality is assuming that you should be taken care of by someone else's child and after that, you owe them nothing. Even if na common #50 pesin spend on you when you no see money take chop, you owe that person If the scenario is flippe and a mam trains a girl through school, you all would curse her out if she decides she wants nothing to do with him thereafter, but look at you saying men shouldn't appreciate the women who have stood by them.. They are not collecting money from you to appreciate their women. To each their own 34 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by mimimile93: 12:48am On Jul 13, 2018 |
zicoraads: If she's in a new relationship then it is wrong. You are indirectly disrespecting her relationship and belittling her new man.. The man that bought a Benz for his ex is an assholee 1 Like |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by Nobody: 12:50am On Jul 13, 2018 |
safarigirl: You owe that person only a “thank you”. Like I said earlier, purchase gifts because you want to and can afford it not because the lady stayed when you were broke ” . That's bullshît. You ain't doing anybody a favour by dating him/her irrespective of his /her condition. Lol.. You had to edit your comment. I never said they requested for money from me to purchase gifts, did I? You females are always overly emotional. I've asked you a question you didn't reply; how many females have purchased cars for men who dated them when they were broke? Seems like the appreciation you're talking about can't be exercised by ladies, huh? Funny creature. 12 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by mimimile93: 1:20am On Jul 13, 2018 |
safarigirl: She fed him, she stood by him, she gave him words of encouragement, she took insult from colleagues bla bla bla. If she really did all these, why did they break up? Rememba the guy who bought the Benz said he was the one that dumped the lady. The lady was that good why did he dump her? Y'all are just bloody leeches.. Women seem to have foresights. They easily detect guys who will hammer and they get stuck to such guys no matter how the condition is or how bad the guys treat them they get stuck cause they know in due time the guys would hammer.. I don't owe no b!tch any penny. I don't bring any ho.e into my success story. I hustle alone and make it alone.. I am going to prove whoever said "BEHIND EVERY SUCCESSFUL MAN THERE'S A WOMAN" wrong.. I am making it without y'all prostitutes.. 23 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by Nobody: 2:46am On Jul 13, 2018 |
There's nothing wrong with rewarding those who held you down when life was rough. We all want to blow so we could help those who helped us. Every decent person who values love, attention and loyalty have a list of people they want to reward. It's not done for the person you're rewarding it's done for yourself, to feel good about yourself. It's all for selfish reasons. I am okay with this fact. The list of people who I want to show my appreciation to; although money could never pay them back because their love is priceless, is in my heart and soul. 3 Likes |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by WORLDPEACE(m): 4:19am On Jul 13, 2018 |
safarigirl: I get some of what you are saying but, really, me too I don't understand the "reward" thing. If I am broke, my wife is broke. If I become rich, my wife becomes rich. I may never become rich. But if I do, my wife is rich automatically. Which one is reward? Am I suppose to make money and she won't have money? Is she suppose to leave when there is no money? In some extreme cases I could understand it. Like if I go into a coma for some time and she has to take care of me. Many of the cases I see just promote disloyalty. Honestly, marriage just looks less and less attractive. Basic requirements don become big deal. It's like a woman going around "rewarding" her husband for not taking another wife. Her standard is definitely not that high. The thing really get as e be. 10 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by highpriestess: 4:44am On Jul 13, 2018 |
me?date a broke idiot?
God forbid. 3 Likes |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by donjobill: 6:07am On Jul 13, 2018 |
I pity those ladies who waste and spend their lives around selfish and cold-hearted guys who cannot express appreciation and gratitude! 24 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by tunize(m): 8:04am On Jul 13, 2018 |
Na true shall cos i never see any woman dey celebrate him man sey the guy actually contributed to her life... 5 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by ImaIma1(f): 8:06am On Jul 13, 2018 |
Op i don't exactly see it as a reward. If the girl has been there when things were bad and she suffered with the guy, when things are good, he wants her to also enjoy with him. Or shouldn't she also enjoy as things are now good? 5 Likes |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by safarigirl(f): 8:29am On Jul 13, 2018 |
mimimile93:you are a child mentally, that is why you are running your mouth with reckless abandon. I don't know if your mother and your sisters are all prostitutes, but I can assure ou now that we are not all like the women in your family. Some of us have values and we also will not allow small boys insult the entire female population of this country because they may or may not have encountered these leeches. I don't know who fu-cked you up, but it is unhealthy to take out your anger on all Nigerian women. It is not as if Nigerian men are loyal anyway BTW: I don't know anything about the oga and his ex, I am speaking from a general viewpoint, not from one incident. And, sometimes, a person will leave you not because you have done wrong, but because they realise they are holding you back and they want the best for you. Not all broken relationships have negativity attached to them. BTW: Many people have progressed in this life without a woman, just like many women have progressed without a man.....but I can tell you this, there are more successful women who have no man than successful men who have no woman Good luck with your life. 26 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by BestDude: 8:35am On Jul 13, 2018 |
mimimile93: Bro, but we agreed you took things easy yesterday na |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by mimimile93: 8:39am On Jul 13, 2018 |
safarigirl: @your last paragraph, such women can't be found in Africa. Nigeria precisely. African women were meant to believe men owe them. Thus; they need men for survival. Don't even use Linda Ikeji and Gennevie as an example because we all know how they make their money. All thanks to our Nigerian politicians. 5 Likes |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by zicoraads: 8:42am On Jul 13, 2018 |
Safarigirl, you can make your point without throwing insults around. Calling me ignorant is insultive. Calling me silly is even more insultive. What I posted was my opinion. And if that wasn't enough, I still made it as part of my title. You can make yours without throwing aspersions on mine. I chose to ignore every other person who did same here. I'm only addressing you because I at least expect better from you. 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by mimimile93: 8:45am On Jul 13, 2018 |
BestDude: Bruv abeg pardon me for this... I was a lil tipsy.. |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by safarigirl(f): 8:48am On Jul 13, 2018 |
zicoraads:I did not call you ignorant. And there is nothing wrong with being ignorant of a status, it simply means, you are yet to experience it. For instance, as far as the idea of racism goes, I am mostly ignorant due to lack of experience. As far as you haven't found yourself in certain situations, you are ignorant of them. It is not an insult, it is a state of mind that can be remedied Let me tell you something you don't know. I did not read your post. I saw your topic and skipped your post to read what other posters had to say and it was from their posts that I saw a lot of ignorance, I honestly, have no idea about whatever you said aside the topic. So, was the ignorant comment for you? No. 15 Likes |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by zicoraads: 8:54am On Jul 13, 2018 |
safarigirl:So am I correct to assume that you can not use the George Clooney case as an example, since you are ignorant of the circumstances that surrounded his rewarding of his friends? 3 Likes |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by safarigirl(f): 9:21am On Jul 13, 2018 |
zicoraads:George Clooney said he was rewarding his friends for beinh there for him through most of his life. He gave a reason, the same reason these men give the women who they gift cars. So, you are not correct. The George Clooney example is very valid in this instance. The ignorance here stems from the fact that you all have either never been dead broke, or never received great help or support from someone, so, you can not possibly understand the root of this sort of gratitude What I want to know, is why you think your opinion should matter when nobody borrowed money from you to give another person a gift. If you don't want to appreciate people for being there for you, that is your call. Don't come on social media and start telling people what and what they should do with their money. There are people who have helped me in my time of need that till tomorrow, if I can give them a Range Rover, I will give them. Then someone like you will come online and start saying I owe such people nothing, is it your owe? 17 Likes |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by Nobody: 9:35am On Jul 13, 2018 |
donjobill: Why do Nigerians feel the man should always be the one to make it. Wwhen broke ladies are in a relationship ,the person will make it and the ladies will be doing nothing just waiting for the partner to make up so that they'll be regarded as women who stayed. I stand by my point that only broke people date broke people. You can't be broke and consider dating another broke individual a favor . How many ladies have even married or purchased a single gift worth as low as 100k for the men who dated them when they were broke? Or are you and this safarigirl trying to say the rewarding you two are talking about isn't applicable to females?. 14 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by Nobody: 9:37am On Jul 13, 2018 |
safarigirl: He never said it is his owe.. When I read your comments on this site, I never knew you can be this rude and inconsiderate. SMH . Zicoraads stop replying her. 1 Like |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by Nobody: 9:39am On Jul 13, 2018 |
tunize: Seems the gratitude isn't applicable to females. 8 Likes |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by Nobody: 9:40am On Jul 13, 2018 |
WORLDPEACE:A mixture of maturity and intelligence. Truer words have never been spoken. 2 Likes |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by zicoraads: 9:51am On Jul 13, 2018 |
safarigirl:I have just finished reading the Clooney story. And I wasn't surprised when it specifically said 'He slept on the couch of a friend...'. Now that is tangible enough. As I'm sure that is only one amongst the several deeds that he felt he needed to be there for his friends when they also contributed in concrete terms to who he is now. And you are derailing. This thread is about relationships between a man and a woman. It is not a friend and my friend thing. So the George Clooney example does not hold water. What this thread is addressing, for which you are yet to grasp, is the belief that once a lady was with you when you were broke, then she automatically deserves to be rewarded. I have dated a lot of ladies. And if I were to say I'll reward any, then it may just be one. Cos I know how much she contributed in terms of valuable advice and concrete steps towards managing my finances and channeling it towards more profitable ventures. Same way I also contributed towards her growth as well. We did it because we loved each other. But isn't that what relationships should be about? The both of you contributing towards the growthof the other? Should I start rewarding her because I've dated other ladies who are money conscious and whatnot? And why shouldn't she even reward me for what I did? Again, I'll like you to understand that people's opinions are theirs and not a Bible for which everyone must follow dutifully. When people make posts on this forum, it is their opinion. You have no right to tell me what I should post or not, neither do I have the right to tell you what to say. Except you got my devices for me, or contributed to the amount of data I use, you can't tell me what I should do online or not. 16 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by zicoraads: 9:58am On Jul 13, 2018 |
Hanseel1:The entitlement mentality of some women in this clime is surprising to say the least. And it has become this way because the men have made it so. A lot of them are materialistic, it is nauseating. How many times have you seen a white man buying material gifts for their wives 'for sticking with them when they had nothing?' If Zuckerberg's wife was a Nigerian, I'm sure she'll want a private jet for 'sticking with him when he was just managing and borrowing money to make sure Facebook is up and running'. 13 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by tunize(m): 10:20am On Jul 13, 2018 |
Hanseel1:Yeah 1 Like |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by Nobody: 10:22am On Jul 13, 2018 |
zicoraads: Truer words have never been spoken. Nigerian men and their inferiority complex have taken this stuff to another level. Purchase gifts for her because you can afford to not because she sticked with you when you got nothing. That's bullshît She also got nothing so what's she going to purchase for the guy for dating her when she was broke? I've never read a post about any woman purchasing a car or any costly gift for a man who dated her when she was broke. Entitlement mentality is the major problem of Nigerian ladies. 18 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by Nobody: 10:24am On Jul 13, 2018 |
tunize:And that's bad. |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by VERDA: 10:41am On Jul 13, 2018 |
zicoraads: Bro....I think it goes beyond men rewarding girl friends or wife just cos they did not leave them when they were poor.....I think men who do this do it because this girlfriends or wives also supported them through this hard period both financially,psychologically,emotionally, spiritually and with sound advice too....a dumb girlfriend who only cares about herself will not stick with you in times of hardship....let's give supportive girlfriends and wives some credit.Loyalty is a scarce commodity these days. 9 Likes |
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Stuck With You When You Were Poor by tunize(m): 10:43am On Jul 13, 2018 |
Hanseel1:Very bad.....i see no reason why i wud gift my girlfriend a gift for staying with me all along without gifting every other person. After all my mother was with me all along and every other close pal. What ppl call relationship is not relationship cos they tend to want something in return. Either a girl is with u all in the name of i believe wen e make am we go marry or something else. Love is suppose to be selfless. How many ppl dey really love somebody as a person weda the person go dey useful or go dey useless***its hard bro. |
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