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How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? - Romance (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? (36514 Views)

Please Help,how Will I Not Marry Her And Not Hurt Her Much / I Love Him But Said No Because I Don't Wanna Hurt Him / He Lacks Confidence: Is This Enough Reason To Turn Him Down? (2) (3) (4)

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Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by Sosorrymods(f): 6:52pm On Sep 02, 2020
Just say no
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by sawdi: 6:53pm On Sep 02, 2020
grin
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by Ent3rpreneur(m): 6:53pm On Sep 02, 2020
Damn nigarrrrrr
The guy is not a real niggarrr,
He for don bang the pvssy, delete your number.
You don dey use am catch cruise
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by HantaVirus(m): 6:54pm On Sep 02, 2020
Sure you can see not all nigerian girls are leeches kiss
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by NeoWanZaeed(m): 6:54pm On Sep 02, 2020
Berryli:
Few weeks to my 25th birthday, last year, I ran into my Neighbour and we exchanged numbers, then the chatting began, we became friends and he offered to take me out on my birthday but It didn't happen.

Fast forward to the lockdown, I would go visit him we would chat and he appreciated my company as he was alone. He eventually started to make moves, getting all touchy which got me a little surprised and uncomfortable since as friends that was improper, which got me thinking if he wants more than friendship.

He has a great career, intelligent and all but not my spec, and I'm not attracted to him. We are very different people, socially and even our views about life. I enjoy his company but that's all there is. As a result if I use to visit twice in a week, I reduced it to once in two weeks and eventually monthly, and reduced the chats just to not give him the wrong impression.

He stylishly refer to me in future as his wife. What do I do? Is he starting to have feelings for me and how do I stylishly turn him down since he hasn't asked me out or do i wait for him to do so? cos there are people who just draw close and start dating without d while toasting stuff or is it just his flesh loosing control, which I doubt cos I try to be as decent as possible wen visiting him.

Do I just go with the flow since I'm currently not in a relationship? But won't that be me deceiving him and myself cos I don't like him in that way. or I'm over thinking the whole thing?


You said you are not attracted to him..

That's the end of discussion fa
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by AlfaSeltzer(m): 6:54pm On Sep 02, 2020
Just open your legs and let him enjoy life. Why are nigerian girls so stingy?

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by urchcoded(m): 6:56pm On Sep 02, 2020
Turn him down if u want, a man is responsible for his emotions
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by Lexusgs430: 6:56pm On Sep 02, 2020
Berryli:
Few weeks to my 25th birthday, last year, I ran into my Neighbour and we exchanged numbers, then the chatting began, we became friends and he offered to take me out on my birthday but It didn't happen.

Fast forward to the lockdown, I would go visit him we would chat and he appreciated my company as he was alone. He eventually started to make moves, getting all touchy which got me a little surprised and uncomfortable since as friends that was improper, which got me thinking if he wants more than friendship.

He has a great career, intelligent and all but not my spec, and I'm not attracted to him. We are very different people, socially and even our views about life. I enjoy his company but that's all there is. As a result if I use to visit twice in a week, I reduced it to once in two weeks and eventually monthly, and reduced the chats just to not give him the wrong impression.

He stylishly refer to me in future as his wife. What do I do? Is he starting to have feelings for me and how do I stylishly turn him down since he hasn't asked me out or do i wait for him to do so? cos there are people who just draw close and start dating without d while toasting stuff or is it just his flesh loosing control, which I doubt cos I try to be as decent as possible wen visiting him.

Do I just go with the flow since I'm currently not in a relationship? But won't that be me deceiving him and myself cos I don't like him in that way. or I'm over thinking the whole thing?


Why can't you just block him?.....

You are busy doing stop it, I like it..... You love his company, but not the person giving and showing the company...........

You are just confused and greedy........

1 Like

Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by NwaIgboBoy(m): 6:57pm On Sep 02, 2020
JUST TELL HIM U HAVE CONTACTED CORONA



u will see he will run like never before ...
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by fatymore(f): 6:58pm On Sep 02, 2020
Since he has not asked you out...

Stop assuming he would and enjoy your friendship
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by 15ssDRIVE(m): 6:59pm On Sep 02, 2020
BlueOrange:
Thank you for being thoughtful and considerate if another soul. This is only something a good person can do

Keep limiting his access to you and withdraw gradually, from one month to three months, he'll get the memo along the line unless he's stvpid


Happy September


Nice points ....but don’t forget say OP,is not in a relationship at the moment. Op didn’t mentioned any dislike/dislikes.

Let the game,begin and only then can Madam get a clearer image.
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by madridsta007(m): 7:00pm On Sep 02, 2020
Berryli:
Few weeks to my 25th birthday, last year, I ran into my Neighbour and we exchanged numbers, then the chatting began, we became friends and he offered to take me out on my birthday but It didn't happen.

Fast forward to the lockdown, I would go visit him we would chat and he appreciated my company as he was alone. He eventually started to make moves, getting all touchy which got me a little surprised and uncomfortable since as friends that was improper, which got me thinking if he wants more than friendship.

He has a great career, intelligent and all but not my spec, and I'm not attracted to him. We are very different people, socially and even our views about life. I enjoy his company but that's all there is. As a result if I use to visit twice in a week, I reduced it to once in two weeks and eventually monthly, and reduced the chats just to not give him the wrong impression.

He stylishly refer to me in future as his wife. What do I do? Is he starting to have feelings for me and how do I stylishly turn him down since he hasn't asked me out or do i wait for him to do so? cos there are people who just draw close and start dating without d while toasting stuff or is it just his flesh loosing control, which I doubt cos I try to be as decent as possible wen visiting him.

Do I just go with the flow since I'm currently not in a relationship? But won't that be me deceiving him and myself cos I don't like him in that way. or I'm over thinking the whole thing?

Tell him you are not interested.
Be clear and blunt.
It is evident that he likes you and wants more than friendship.
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by izubext007: 7:00pm On Sep 02, 2020
stop collecting his � money
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by Olayetan(m): 7:01pm On Sep 02, 2020
Follow your mind, no 1 can tell you the best to do other than your mind cux if you do otherwise what your mind tells you, you will live to regret it but if you follow your mind and the opposite happen, you will still appreciate what your mind tells you...
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by humilitypays(m): 7:01pm On Sep 02, 2020
Berryli:
Few weeks to my 25th birthday, last year, I ran into my Neighbour and we exchanged numbers, then the chatting began, we became friends and he offered to take me out on my birthday but It didn't happen.

Fast forward to the lockdown, I would go visit him we would chat and he appreciated my company as he was alone. He eventually started to make moves, getting all touchy which got me a little surprised and uncomfortable since as friends that was improper, which got me thinking if he wants more than friendship.

He has a great career, intelligent and all but not my spec, and I'm not attracted to him. We are very different people, socially and even our views about life. I enjoy his company but that's all there is. As a result if I use to visit twice in a week, I reduced it to once in two weeks and eventually monthly, and reduced the chats just to not give him the wrong impression.

He stylishly refer to me in future as his wife. What do I do? Is he starting to have feelings for me and how do I stylishly turn him down since he hasn't asked me out or do i wait for him to do so? cos there are people who just draw close and start dating without d while toasting stuff or is it just his flesh loosing control, which I doubt cos I try to be as decent as possible wen visiting him.

Do I just go with the flow since I'm currently not in a relationship? But won't that be me deceiving him and myself cos I don't like him in that way. or I'm over thinking the whole thing?
You are a very good lady with human empathy, and I commend you for that.


But in as much as I commend you for your empathy towards a fellow human's feelings, I must tell you the saddest truth; you will definitely end up with a wrong guy cry cry


In this life, take it from me, when it comes to settling down, nature gave man that absolute right to decide...that's why nature gave ladies that heart to accept just anybody that show them sincere care and affection unlike men.


You as a woman, you are created by nature to accept a man who shows you sincere affection, commitment, affection and respect......but western civilisation media exposure and whatnot have made women to believe they can chose their spec of a man; mostly based on physical looks which is not how women are naturally designed, they only got influenced, and majority if not all of the women that use that word "not my spec" or "I am not attracted to him" while neglecting the guy's sincere interest and commitment towards them always end up with the wrong guy, and its always too late for them, so think twice.


All the best

7 Likes

Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by Peacefuluz(f): 7:01pm On Sep 02, 2020
Hmm
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by maiquel: 7:01pm On Sep 02, 2020
So he calls you wife or sees you as one in the future... that's where you tell him point blank. "I don't see a future with you, I don't want to be your wife whether now or in the future"
But I guess you like the attention and the sweetness he offers.
Come off it jare!

1 Like

Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by jaxxy(m): 7:02pm On Sep 02, 2020
Berryli:
Few weeks to my 25th birthday, last year, I ran into my Neighbour and we exchanged numbers, then the chatting began, we became friends and he offered to take me out on my birthday but It didn't happen.

Fast forward to the lockdown, I would go visit him we would chat and he appreciated my company as he was alone. He eventually started to make moves, getting all touchy which got me a little surprised and uncomfortable since as friends that was improper, which got me thinking if he wants more than friendship.

He has a great career, intelligent and all but not my spec, and I'm not attracted to him. We are very different people, socially and even our views about life. I enjoy his company but that's all there is. As a result if I use to visit twice in a week, I reduced it to once in two weeks and eventually monthly, and reduced the chats just to not give him the wrong impression.

He stylishly refer to me in future as his wife. What do I do? Is he starting to have feelings for me and how do I stylishly turn him down since he hasn't asked me out or do i wait for him to do so? cos there are people who just draw close and start dating without d while toasting stuff or is it just his flesh loosing control, which I doubt cos I try to be as decent as possible wen visiting him.

Do I just go with the flow since I'm currently not in a relationship? But won't that be me deceiving him and myself cos I don't like him in that way. or I'm over thinking the whole thing?

What exactly do u mean by he is not ur spec? And what is Ur spec?? I ask cos sometimes we hold ridiculous ideas of our spec till reality sets in. So pls make sure ure being fair and reasonable.

I’m not asking u to date him bt know exactly what u want cos gals are usually and mostly confused. I’ve also seen ladies Change their so called specs over and again for all manner of reasons. Cheers

3 Likes

Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by Intrepid01(m): 7:02pm On Sep 02, 2020
No wahala...I’m not attracted to him yen yen yen...we’ll be here to ask how far about that your myopic decision you made 10yrs ago?
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by Jaqenhghar: 7:03pm On Sep 02, 2020
Berryli:
Few weeks to my 25th birthday, last year, I ran into my Neighbour and we exchanged numbers, then the chatting began, we became friends and he offered to take me out on my birthday but It didn't happen.

Fast forward to the lockdown, I would go visit him we would chat and he appreciated my company as he was alone. He eventually started to make moves, getting all touchy which got me a little surprised and uncomfortable since as friends that was improper, which got me thinking if he wants more than friendship.

He has a great career, intelligent and all but not my spec, and I'm not attracted to him. We are very different people, socially and even our views about life. I enjoy his company but that's all there is. As a result if I use to visit twice in a week, I reduced it to once in two weeks and eventually monthly, and reduced the chats just to not give him the wrong impression.

He stylishly refer to me in future as his wife. What do I do? Is he starting to have feelings for me and how do I stylishly turn him down since he hasn't asked me out or do i wait for him to do so? cos there are people who just draw close and start dating without d while toasting stuff or is it just his flesh loosing control, which I doubt cos I try to be as decent as possible wen visiting him.

Do I just go with the flow since I'm currently not in a relationship? But won't that be me deceiving him and myself cos I don't like him in that way. or I'm over thinking the whole thing?
Tell him you live him like a brother. Telm jom you just dont see him as a partner rather as a brother
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by Jaqenhghar: 7:03pm On Sep 02, 2020
jaxxy:


What exactly do u mean by he is not ur spec? And what is Ur spec?? I ask cos sometimes we hold ridiculous ideas of our spec till reality sets in. So pls make sure ure being fair and reasonable.

I’m not asking u to date him bt know exactly what u want cos gals are usually and mostly confused. I’ve also seen ladies Change their so called specs over and again for all manner of reasons. Cheers
Na by force. If someone doesnt feel attracted to you is it a crime?

2 Likes

Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by ednut1(m): 7:04pm On Sep 02, 2020
you are mad and have no one to tell you. you visit him well but he is not your type. Thank God he no rape you sha
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by Almunjid(m): 7:05pm On Sep 02, 2020
Those men that u loved and gave ur body to, what have u got from them apart from money and heart break? Has ur love helped in sustaining any of the relationship u had?
Get a man that loves u and get married, u will begin to love him more when u get to know him for whom he is.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by LikeAking: 7:05pm On Sep 02, 2020
Berryli:
Few weeks to my 25th birthday, last year, I ran into my Neighbour and we exchanged numbers, then the chatting began, we became friends and he offered to take me out on my birthday but It didn't happen.

Fast forward to the lockdown, I would go visit him we would chat and he appreciated my company as he was alone. He eventually started to make moves, getting all touchy which got me a little surprised and uncomfortable since as friends that was improper, which got me thinking if he wants more than friendship.

He has a great career, intelligent and all but not my spec, and I'm not attracted to him. We are very different people, socially and even our views about life. I enjoy his company but that's all there is. As a result if I use to visit twice in a week, I reduced it to once in two weeks and eventually monthly, and reduced the chats just to not give him the wrong impression.

He stylishly refer to me in future as his wife. What do I do? Is he starting to have feelings for me and how do I stylishly turn him down since he hasn't asked me out or do i wait for him to do so? cos there are people who just draw close and start dating without d while toasting stuff or is it just his flesh loosing control, which I doubt cos I try to be as decent as possible wen visiting him.

Do I just go with the flow since I'm currently not in a relationship? But won't that be me deceiving him and myself cos I don't like him in that way. or I'm over thinking the whole thing?

Erica wetin you dey do for here?.

3 Likes

Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by IamPlato(m): 7:05pm On Sep 02, 2020
you just have to let him know. there is no way of making it known without hurtin him. just tell him so he can move on
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by bluefilm: 7:07pm On Sep 02, 2020
Berryli:
Few weeks to my 25th birthday, last year, I ran into my Neighbour and we exchanged numbers, then the chatting began, we became friends and he offered to take me out on my birthday but It didn't happen.

Fast forward to the lockdown, I would go visit him we would chat and he appreciated my company as he was alone. He eventually started to make moves, getting all touchy which got me a little surprised and uncomfortable since as friends that was improper, which got me thinking if he wants more than friendship.

He has a great career, intelligent and all but not my spec, and I'm not attracted to him. We are very different people, socially and even our views about life. I enjoy his company but that's all there is. As a result if I use to visit twice in a week, I reduced it to once in two weeks and eventually monthly, and reduced the chats just to not give him the wrong impression.

He stylishly refer to me in future as his wife. What do I do? Is he starting to have feelings for me and how do I stylishly turn him down since he hasn't asked me out or do i wait for him to do so? cos there are people who just draw close and start dating without d while toasting stuff or is it just his flesh loosing control, which I doubt cos I try to be as decent as possible wen visiting him.

Do I just go with the flow since I'm currently not in a relationship? But won't that be me deceiving him and myself cos I don't like him in that way. or I'm over thinking the whole thing?

So just because he is referring to you as his wife in the future, you now think he is already thinking of you as his wife?

The way some of you girls dey reason at times.

My friend to tell you the truth, you are the one deceiving yourself.

If you want to let him know that you don't consider him at all for any love-entanglement business, then you should be making plans to introduce your REAL boyfriend to him.

Dasal.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by Laureenxyz7(m): 7:07pm On Sep 02, 2020
you don't need to go with the flow,you may not like the outcome,if you are not in a relationship wait until you get one, since you said he isn't your spec,you just have to let him know how you feel, before you develop pity instead of love,tell him sincerely how you like him,stating your facts, my dear it's better you hurt him now with the truth or you live to regret it,thank me later

1 Like

Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by Nobody: 7:09pm On Sep 02, 2020
4rm Ur Story It Seems U Were Fund Of Him B4, Cuz U Were Visiting Him Frequently B4 But May Be Getting Pissed Off By His Attitude Which May Av Made U 2 Begin Lose Interest In Him. However, U Can Turn Him Down Without Hurting Him. I Just Want 2 Be Sure U Are Not Into Him 2 Avoid Any Regret.
Re: How Do I Turn Him Down And Not Hurt Him? by jaxxy(m): 7:09pm On Sep 02, 2020
Jaqenhghar:

Na by force. If someone doesnt feel attracted to you is it a crime?

Nope. I believe in mutual attraction. Bt I have seen gals miss the attraction game over and again. Sometimes they even loose attraction for who they thought they where attracted to, why? Cos attraction isn’t to just the person alone bt how u get along to with the person and many valid reasons not flimsy ones. There are many things that make a gal attracted to a guy and gals get some of these things confused.

For instance being attracted to a bad boy and then u discover its really not what u want after u have suffered. Lolz

4 Likes

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