₦airaland Forum

2SWT:
I actually don't know the fellow

You don't know who, Omo igbo to ko Hip Hop,aburo Phyno Stand Up there, raise one leg and smoke monkey's cigarette!

17) An Imo girl walked up to her fiancé, with the list and without looking at it, he said- is that all and I was scared before- just 16 pages mtscheew, she smiled, brought his head closer and whispered in his ear- honey, this is just the table of content.

18) See all this yeye girls, fake breast, fake butt, fake face but they want real love.

19) Most European footballers end their career at 31, most Nigerian footballers start theirs at 35. Micheal Obi is going play till 2072.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzxjbS19MP0

MARKone:


Wetin the Dog dey look

The dog is looking at a cat ooo

14) I hate going to concerts, you will hear, two fingers in the hair, both hands in the hair, jump jump, I came to have fun- when did you become my personal trainer?

15) 2face said he is officially blind, I always see him wearing glasses in door I just thought he had Apollo.

16) I am bigger than 9ice, I have 3 pockets.

10) Now it is fashionable to wear my junior brother’s trousers. we all are wearing my junior brother dash me

11) You don’t know the value of something until you auction it

12) People say no one is born ugly, just broke, I ask them how rich does Obj have to get

7) Nigerian men are sexist chauvinistic pigs, why are these men stopping Nigerian women from fighting in Sambisa Forest?

Do you know why gays dress well? Because they spend most of their life in the closet.

9) You see 10 white guys and a black guy, you think- progressive guys. You see 10 black guys and one white guy, you think- serious brushing waiting to happen.

4) Sometimes I wish I was from Zimbabwe, I could just send my mum 2000 naira and go mum -build yourself a mansion.

5) Nigerians are respectful people but If a Nigerian is using 3 sirs in a sentence for you, they want something from you.

6) I have studied slavery, it is a complex issue, contrary to what everyone thinks, it is not so black and white.

That is what I mean when I say I want a girl down to earth

People keep telling me I am funny, I should become a comedian but I don’t think I am that funny, I think I am a bit funny and I love making people smile and laugh, I am just here sharing my jokes. I hope you enjoy it. I will share 3 jokes per day. I could write a story form jokes but will do one line as I hate to read epistle too. Hope you enjoy it. Let me know if you like any of the jokes otherwise have a great day :-)

1) Nigerians love to dance too much, even the horses on our coats of arms are dancing shakiti bobo.

2) They asked Ruggedman- did you leave music? he said no I never left music, it was music that left me.

3) Love is what you promise a girl when you don’t have money.

Nigerian Lives Matter!

Buhari: When I was campaigning I told them I will give them change, if they check their bank account now, what do they have?

Osinbao: Sai you go kill person ooo

Wow this is very Creative :-) More adiagbon to your elbow!

Although we have to give him credit for trying to bring back our yams, that does not mean we should not tell him and those that will listen about his failures if he wants another four years, you can’t just go on only corruption we want more. We need to commend you on the fight on Boko Haram and Corruption but here are some places you need to work on sir.
Buratia- Please relieve him of his duty unless he has something on you sir, there is no reason you should not let him go. This man is corrupt and you have gone after every corrupt politician without being partisan, everyday this man remains in duty is bringing stain on your name. Fayose now has something to go after, why are you going after him when you won’t go after Butarai
Bring Back Our Girls- As earlier said we commend you on attempt to bring back our yams, but don’t forget to bring back our girls, how many months did you say it will take to bring them back the girls again?
Economy- The inflation is too high people are exchanging their children for food, Mr President can we get subsidy on food? Just rice, garri and tomatoes.
Fulani- Your cousins are killing people up and down. Please have a family meeting and tell them to put their children’s hand inside the cloth. You have more land in the North sir why should they come to our father’s house to bully us? Do you know your cousins have killed more people than Boko Haram this year?

Kidnapping- Sir this kidnapping is so common now people have started placing bet on who will be kidnapped next.

Niger delta boys- Those boys are not relenting, there is NDA and some remixes, can you do more sir, don’t just protect the pipeline sir, protect life, liberty and the land over there, my brothers that live in that area only sleep with one eye closed with cellotape.

One-sided appointment- Sir we have intelligent people that are also patriotic in the south too, I swear some of our sisters went to Harvard too and we can verify their certificate which is not what we can say about you sir.

Opulence- Sir we want you to look dignified when you project our image but you can still dress stately without wearing Gucci beside Gucci is Italian and who Italy epp? Sir you also didn’t need to break fast with all those people, those foods could have been given to those who are in living in penury and are already exchanging their children for food.

Travelling abroad- That is why you have ministers who can sign and attend meetings on your behalf, you need to lead by example sir. When you were coming back the last time , the custom officer was asking how long were you visiting Nigeria for sir.

Understandly you have a lot on your plate but I hope God will give you the strength to address all these issues, I still think you are less corrupt than most people but after a while people might pray for corruption to come back as life was not as difficult as this.

Long Live Nigeria
Long live her good citizens
Long Live Buhari
PS

Prince Abinibi- Senior Professor of Life teaching Life 101 @ University of Life (UoL), formerly Experience Polythenic (EP).

When they want to pray, they pray for France
When they want to spray, they spray American dollars
When they loot, they stash it in Switzerland
When they want to shoot, they go to South Africa
When they want education, they go to England
When they want medication, they go to Germany
When they want a nuptial rite, they go to Dubai
When they want a ride, they go Japanese
When they want to shop, they go Chinese
When they want to Hols, they go to the States

And people wonder why the dollar is always going up? I don't know too! We are all guilty of this to some extent or the other.
We have to not only love Nigeria, we have to start paying a premium for things and people made in Nigeria. Naija till Six feet.
This is not to say we should not care about other countries but we should at least show as much or more care for our fatherland/motherland. We have a lot of Nigerian equivalent which are as good or better. Love Nigeria Live Nigerian Buy Nigerian. Join the movement #LNLNBN.

God bless Nigeria
God bless her good citizens
God bless Dr Prince Abinibi

Dr Prince Abinibi-Senior Professor of Life- Teaching Life 101 @ University of Life (UoL)

mu2sa2:
Those two - lady and gentleman indeed. The lady has not offended him, so no basis to embarrass her, afterall she's not Gen. Abacha. And the guy acted gentlemanly by apologizing, having realized his mistake. These are the kind of people we should celebrate.

Why should she not be embarassed? you think she has not benefited from her dad's loot unless she changes her name and disavow her father, she should be reminded everyday of how callous her father was, go to Germany you have children of those close to hitler castrating themselves, Abacha was Nigeria Hitler and that is not an exageration. The guy was coward for apologising. truly an Afonja offspring.

Make I grab plate, o boy where spoon dey, na to use hand oooo NCA Lauterbrunen Branch