₦airaland Forum

sapphiere:
And Nairaland boys are supporting him.

This man shouldn't be allowed to walk freely.

Zzor:
Yes,but I left because correct big boys didn't show up,after all the shopping I did,it was some assistant pastors that were hovering around and some small small boys. Have I spoken your mind?

gidgiddy:
" Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable."

John F. Kennedy, 13 March 1962

Mowaconfused:
Relationship matter tire me these days bro

Bigiway:
Not cost . Even cheaper with the type of varieties. You can confirm from Yoruba Farmer that knows about the Yam

Bigiway:
Not cost . Even cheaper with the type of varieties. You can confirm from Yoruba Farmer that knows about the Yam

Sarita01:
hey I'm not against the op's views, in fact I think she made a strong point, I think a man that plays a major role in his wife's success story deserves loyalty to the very end.

Jodha:
I feel if his intentions were genuine he would have talked to his gf before giving his ex the money...or atleast tell her ...not her finding out..

FashionCookie:
Lolzzz...bottom line is, men will still do things for women no matter what. Na so d life be.

FashionCookie:
Like I'll always say, whether Nairaland alpha males(as they call themselves) like it or not, there are men out there ready to do anything for Nigerian ladies(Like they refer to us). Una go dey here dey read the news...if you guys Like, you can shout from now to 2023...E no touch ANYWHERE.
Many of una go cry sleep this night...opor!
Congrats ma'am...more keys. God bless the giver, may he not lack. Amen.

Zzor:
The type of husband I'm looking for,but richer than this one sha

thebosstrevor1:
We dont get tired for sharing the truth.

chrisj2:
I disagree to some extent on the issues of misogyny and African men not be able to adjust. Some have been abroad for many many years and have had relationships with western Washington men both black or white. There is just something different about bringing someone abroad and those brought over developing serious wings even when the men are no different from their white counterparts. Oyinbo men too do misogyny and their women too can be as submissive...

Black women at times have the Jezebel complex and get too angry...

linearity:
I totally agreed.

My point is to juxtapose what the society thinks of men in Nigeria vs the Western world....also how men carry themselves on average in these two societies.

Yes yours observations of my write-up that men in African settings on average fall into this ‘strict posture’ category.

My post is to tell these category of men that, in the western world, that is not the case; rather it is half and half, so they should adjust.

Now, the debate about which of these postures: African ‘strict posture’ vs Western ‘half-n-half posture’ is the best is left for another day...but if you look at marriages on both hemispheres; African’s last longer despite these strict postures., though this might not be a true test.

kings59:
Brother, I am confused. My starting point is Iyano iba not Iyano ipaja.

linearity:
Very good observation.

You should remember that, when the law or Judge want to keep the level of family living the same post divorce, they consider the children of the marriage, who did not wrong.

The questions the law try to answer in favor of the children included:

If the children use to visit Paris, London, Disney World, etc once in a year; why should they now be punished by been denied that opportunity because the adult in the room decide to pick their ball and want to go their separate ways?

If the children use to stay in a five star hotel, why punished them by reducing it to four star hotel because you guys are divorcing?

The parents were the ones out of their own free will elevated the children living conditions and experiences to these high standards. The court is just there to ascertain what those standards were and try as much as possible to maintain them.

I don’t think divorce is as attractive as you put it. Though African men are most at disadvantage when it happens to them in the western world.

Just like it is expected in Africa and Nigeria, these men expect their wives to be submissive, obedient and take them as the final authority...while some Africa women will not be happy with this and insist that ‘we are now in advance society where everyone is equal and we should live that way period!’.....

They also forget that, because of that same African culture, the man goes against the ‘advance society’ culture to make you a full house wife while he toils day & night; he sends you to Nursing School, paid the whole school fees (in true fashion of western world, you would be on your own or in loans) and did many things by you just because you are both of the same culture.

All these he did, because that culture says he is the head, as such he went far and above to provide his absolute best and sometimes 100% and not requiring even 10% from you, talkless of the western culture 50%.

Now, if the tables are turned and during divorce...the men should understand that those same women will come for 50% and even more of everything....and it is their right to demand for it, just like it was never your responsibility as a man in the western world to provide more than 50%..

Yes in Nigeria or Africa, it is your responsibility and societal expectations as a man to provide 100%, but that knowledge will not help you in a western country’s court room, so have that in mind as you toil, sweat and work your azz off for any lady in the western world.

I will say, let them work and make their own money and don’t forget to demand for half the rent or mortgage money from them at the end of each month, you might think, it is hash or it makes you look ‘less than a man’...write it in your head, you guys are equal...also the fact that you demand and she pays half the rent/mortgage will tremendously help your case in the divorce court years to come and might even help you keep your house or if the court gave her the house because of the kids, she will be ordered to pay you half of the equity in installments.

chrisj2:
You will be surprised; if not for my family, my own for stay in Nja for a long long time. Discovered that the relationship was a mistake soon after but pikin dey and some men are actually very responsible despite what some women think or say...
It takes a lot of work and sacrifice to be able to sponsor someone to come abroad - it is even more so when the partner or spouse has very little in every aspect...
The women can continue to do as they please, it will reflect on the children - the Nja communities abroad will soon become like Janis - many single mothers and baby fathers. Gangs and knife culture and also poverty and jail time for a lot of the boys from these associations

organiza:
All stalked... contact us for your seed yam and yam setts.

Henryimoter:
sweet Benue yams available , contact today for your tubers and seed yam call 07069670428