Wayne4uall:

It seems u are watching ur own from a black and white television

Nah, the guy is watching live from a black market

deltateam:


Yes definitely. Which package are you subscribed. Gotv has up to 5 sports channels with #1900 package and one of them must show it at least.

None of them is showing the match jawe

Liverpool fans are just killing me laughs right now... Una go hear am tonight! You guys think that early one goal will help you shey

symbianDON:
I recall a friend who was once travelling to Lagos. On the way, he was pulled over by the shitty police. They asked him where he was going to to which he replied he was going to sokoto one of the police men screamed, 'oga! na sokoto road be this?' and my friend replied, 'officer, I thought there was freedom of movement in Nigeria? It doesn't matter which road I choose to follow, what matters is that I'm on my way to sokoto!' Next thing they said was, 'oya, open your booth, wetin de inside'. Meanwhile he had some bunches of plantain in his booth. Soon as he opened, one of them looked into the booth and obviously saw the bunches of plantain but still stu.p.idly asked, 'wetin be this?' my friend looked at him and with a straight face answered, 'yam' at this point the policeman, who wasn't expecting that, was clearly taken aback and agitated. He went further to query him, 'no be plaintain I de look so?'......as calmly as he could, my friend replied, 'oh! you guys call it plantain? in my village we call it yam' the policeman was so very annoyed already and screamed at him, 'your head no correct!! oya carry your madness comot from my front now now!!'

This got me rolling

sizzlingcold:
Ewo tun ni acting carrier

English get wahala jare
I had to read through your statement like 5 times before realizing career was spelt as carrier. I was like... ehn acting carrier nah, what's wrong with it
Ati carrier o ati career... The mind understood it laidat o jawe.

Starboytwo:
I formerly declare this thread open for market for our South eastern brothers(aka iPod)..this thread is for you....kindly enjoy while it last cuz something will definitely happen in India sooner or later.....

SIR0:
The white man looks frustrated. Naija economy must have dealt with him

Wishing the two quick recovery

Patrick33:
This mordern day kids will never know the joy of calling the bad guy "boss"..hehe..now they'll be shouting "villian villian"..mtcheww

And the 'villain' sef no sweet to call

Happy world water day!

It's another March 22, a day set aside to celebrate and advocate for good water for all.

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Don't waste water, don't contaminate water... It is a resource our lives depend!

Be an advocate of water today, spread to the world and make water safe and available for all.

It begins with you and I!

Good quality water... Happy people!

Nna mehn ... The traffic on this thread is a wow! Next level loading...

sheedy407:
As seen in the photo
Buhari had to confirm who his wife voted for.

Does this confirm the fear being circulated that Buhari isn't sure if his wife would vote for him?

Only time would tell

https://mobile.twitter.com/officialdaddymo/status/1099216588232949760

Can't you see the man is just tryna be hilarious... Buhari is a fun person!

Why is everyone dumb in this part of the world!
Ontop 35k!
I don't think a sane person that values all the suffering years in school should be seen risking his/her life like this.
Accepting one's fate with no protest under this kind of condition is not acceptable to one's pride.
If these people had protested against this act of injustice, they would have stand a chance of being respected and treated with respect in a future event. We should learn to be able to survive with rejections when our lives and health are at stake.
Actions speak volume!

Which way Nigeria!
No bearing, no relatable magnitude... The country is now turninoniown!
No sector seems to get it right, shall we call this an ill planned or hijacked event?

General247:
No to Atiku No to Buhari

How I wish this man could be the next President of Nigeria

News in Nigeria need to be verified in at least 3 different sources before being confirmed true... What a country!

In a sane country, should this even be a campaign statement?
Is enriching a categorized set of people meant to be a focus of someone expected to lead over 200 million people?
Are people becoming more gullible over the years?
Is it that these are the only sets of people that can lead us in this country? Imagine an administration tackling corruption with shield on some set of loyalists whereas another one, if given the opportunity, is intending to bring the corruption back in full flesh. Yet most people still have the effrontery to chose to support either publicly!
Why can't we repeat what was done in year 2015 in a different dimension by voting in a young fellow with vision who is entirely different from the past leaders rulers?
Sincerely, this country has got brains capable of developing this country beyond what seems attainable but until we see reasons within ourselves to fight for what we truly want...

DesChyko:
This is so true.
I woke up one night to browse despite receiving signals from 6 battalion not to do so.
After 1:00am, I heard a voice in my kidney saying
'You have now been penetrated by a demon through your chest'
I looked at my chest and saw blood coming out from a tiny hole.
Immediately, I stopped browsing, turned off my phone, switch off the light, put off the generating plant and called PHCN not to give us electricity till the next day.
Two minutes later, I got an SMS on the phone I turned off saying 'The demon has just left'.
I took a look at my chest and noticed the blood has stopped flowing. Instead, I noticed that what was flowing looked like Hollandia youghurt; strawberry flavour. I just took two spoonful, said my prayers after meal and went back to sleep

Hahahaha... This guy wee not kill somebody with laughter

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Intermission... Only a graduate or an experienced student will understand!

Rayreezy:
It was reported that the INEC and ASUU held a meeting today to discuss about the on going strike and the 2019 Elections.

After the meeting, the INEC announced via their Twitter handle that the ASUU has agreed to partake in the 2019 Elections.

Imagine this ASUU strike lingering till the Presidential election is held, then Buhari didn't win the election... Estimate what month and year the strike would be suspended.

Wuraola01:


Lol.
February 18 too?

I'm actually June 3rd! I like your name though

Wuraola01:
February 18

wealth's gold

Wuraola01:
February 18

wealth's gold

Are you guys telling me there's no June 3rd born on this forum

samysmoothfresh:
From your write up, here are


A) Reasons why you should not quit the relationship


1) you love her.


2) you just recovered from a messy relationship and she somehow found a way to break through the barriers you must have set round your heart which means she's prolly special or has something in common with you.



B) Reasons why you should quit the realtionship


1) she doesnt accept her faults and sometimes you have to apologise even when she's wrong..........................she's proud!!


2) she keeps late night, go to concerts at 12am with friends who according to you aren't "presentable"....................she's a slay queen and prolly a wild rebellious one too!!.


3) she puts her friends first before you notwithstanding the fact that you guys who are supposedly in a relationship havent seen in a long while...........................she's insensitive and a member of the "hoes before niggas" gang!!


4) she keeps secrets and claim to "forget to tell you"......................she's not to be trusted!!.


5) she keeps and move with friend who arent "presentable" and by presentable i assume you mean they dress indecently.......................theres a 65% chance her friends are runz girls and an 85% chance she herself is a coded runz girl!!!.




OP, i'm asking you, should you quit the relationship?


yes or no?

Best illustration, 2018
Best question, 2018
Best advice, 2018
Op, no one can help you better than this �

labake1:




Working

What kinda work are you into? It is expected that money comes after work

Colourich:
Thanks.

You are welcome... Good luck!

Colourich:
I'm actually not crushing on anyone, the time I crush on guys have gone, the issue is that I have this notion of my very own ideal man and when these suitors don't meet up, I just lose interest. And its not about rich man or not, some of them are rich but my ideal man is my ideal man.

Do you know that an exact 'ideal man' don't really exist? It's only a definition of something you created with your instincts and since you won't be able to create a man yourself, then finding that ideal man may just be a myth... I have the opinion that one can only find someone close to it

Heloct:
The ones that are ready thinks I'm too young.

I really want to marry young.

It's good to marry young... Young parents train their kids better

OperaMini1:
Good day people.

IMy kids aged 8.5, and 6 years respectively, fight each other at the least provocation. They fight over who lies down where, who sits where in the car, who uses the toothpaste first, etc.

I came home yesterday and the elder (girl) had a bodily harm inflicted on her by the brother, and which is the second time she's getting a mark from him. As I write this now, they've been both grounded, since that yesterday, no watching of TV, no computer games, just sleep and wake up, eat and sleep again.

I'm not sure how long we'd do this, that's why I'm seeking suggestions on how to stop the fighting madness entirely, thanks.

It's normal... I can remember while growing up, we were all time rivals but at the point when maturity sets in, we realized the need for us to accept ourselves as a team and support one another in everything we find ourselves doing.
However, as a parent, you need to sit them down once in a while to share words with them on the essentials of seeing one's blood as a friend and not rival.

lonecatt:
If it targets only 30,000 traders in a state what happens to other traders?
This is a sophisticated way of buying over 30percent of traders votes in all the state.
Scam alert

At least some '1million+' set of people would be assisted... I think it's better than zero assist.

Colourich:
I'm scared of getting married to the wrong person, I don't like my suitors and I have zero tolerance level, which is why I can't marry someone I don't love deeply. I can only tolerate someone excesses if I love them deeply.

God have mercy on me, I might as well end up single and lonely for the rest of my life .

Perhaps there's a crush of yours you'd wished he ask you out other than the suitors you are getting. Most times, it's difficult to love what you refuse to accept.