₦airaland Forum

VillageBoi: Prof I'm trying not to be bad but you wan kill me with laff nah! Why did you bring tears to my eyes.
PS - That thumbs up like you got... I'm very sure is from 'The Boss'

You are not serious oh. I liked his post but I'm not 'the Boss'. This is really a sign of end tym. Let's all be careful. Boss ko, actor ni.

It's you and Prof that are 'the Bosses'. I hail.

bukatyne: You are either 27. 38 or 22

I need a gun

My age is part of the three options. If you can get @onegig's mathematics, then, you'll know my age.

You need a gun for wetin

*Runs from thread* E gbami oo!!!

speedyboi: Upload a picture and you will see how they will be harrasing you with 'Mr Nairaland' nonsense

Dey deceive yasef for dia.

^^^^^ @ Villageboi. ..I agree totally wiv dis. Now you're talking [s]though you were spitting fire sha amidst your comment[/s] .

@OP, pls note all the things Tony nd Villageboi have suggested. Much more, try going to the library of this section and check scripts like 'Mothering Heights', 'Eye for an eye', 'Evil genius', 'Paranoia' etc. You would get one thing or two from the scripts and the comments/corrections made on them.

Goodluck.

danielmay16: I tink u shud play around more with adjectives, makes lines punchy. Yea, I saw d picture painted n synchd wit it.
Nice sharp turn conflict 'blood seepin out...'
Lots of description, u'll b a better novel writer.
Hailn a broda

Bro, I appreciate your feedback and I would take note of using more adjectives.

And I don't think I would be a better novel writer.

onegig: Nope....the number we manipulated....exchange it for last digit of yours..


I hope you get it now. Don't mind me. I like stressing people sometimes.

I knew that was what you meant. Subtract 2 frm urs, dats my age by October 17.

tpia1: hmm, interesting interior, exterior is rather unusual for nigeria.

I agree.

ditrix: I hv,bt sm dnt v cos dey r ugly

In as much as I get your point, pls refrain from calling a fellow human being "ugly" when the person isn't an incident. They didn't create themselves, did they? Rather, call them 'plain'. Tenk.

danielmay16: Cool

Is that for my 'advice' here or the short script I recommended?

onegig: Ewo!!! Wrong....


Am actually "closer" to you.Add 9 to your last digit. Take the last number.


[size=5pt]Don't loud it[/size] LOL!

Subtract two from yours Wait oo...wetin be ur age sef?

homesteady: Yea! The orange colour! That's what all this modern houses are using now! It was GTB that made the colour popular!

Really? O ga ju!

Ile yii fine oo.

Didn't know orange colour would make sense like this at the exterior of a house. Nice architecture.

VillageBoi: Hilarious ke? Lol, na tube and tyre... they go burn the actress straight. "Na winch oh, na winch oh."

Lol.

onegig: Am a guy.....


Age= Guess?

Sex=Male

Location=Nigeria.

You are 45 years old . Your location? Isn't it Banana Island plantation?

Nashville: I did not say one year, I said one ...... (fill in the blanks)

Ayam sorry sir. I now get the missing word.

bukatyne: Decade!

Don't ask me how I know

I see.

onegig: I never did check ..

Just a guess. Good with it sometimes.

Try it out. Pretend you a guy and ask ten different ladies their age. At least 8 will decline telling you.

I don't know their reasons for that.(me too dey always wonder what it changes)

*scratches head*

Sebi you be guy naa? Oga abeg, wetin be ur age? It affects the price of garri pls.

Nashville: We are actually about the same age. I am just one ........ older than you!

Oga Nashville...is dat true?


*Quickly checks Bukatyne's profile*

@OP....I have read it.

One, please learn to vividly describe your scenes. You didn't tell us how many ppl were in the restaurant, what age range Amaka, Tomiwa and Chuks fall in and their body features. The age range would help during casting. You shouldn't leave anything to the reader's or viewer's imagination.

Two, your mistake of assigning the wrong lines to the characters (like Amaka speaking instead of Tomiwa) is a grave mistake and that almost killed my interest in reading your script. And pls, Tommy is a masculine name o. Kinda confused me about Tommy's gender at the beginning. This is why description is vital...even if the girl bears masculine name sef.

Three, the dialogue was fast-paced which I like but there are some wacky lines there.

Four, I didn’t 'feel' the story as a whole to be sincere. But I commend your effort. You can always get better bro. Welcome to TV/Movies section.

https://www.nairaland.com/1449649/nigerian-horror-story-short-film

The above is a link to a short script I wrote of recent. Though, it's far from perfect and I'm still learning too, you would learn the description stuff I pointed out and also get how important it is for the storyline to be quite engaging, especially for a short script where interesting characters can't be fully fleshed out. You can also go to the Tv/Movies section library thread to check out other scripts to learn one or two things. Best wishes.

onegig: Learnt most ladies don't want people to have an idea of their ages.

I wonder why.

But why una dey deactivate naa? Na so so @hopeyemmy deactivate too days ago. I still dey vex o, ope

@OP...RIP

chikk: I'm 16th too.

You dis 16th ppl...una don overtake dis thread patapata. Hbd in advance.

bukatyne: Actually, 50

iamlegend: I'm Oct 17 also.

Really? ! That's nice oo. Bro, hw we dey do am naa?

VillageBoi: Ok I've read it. I have one question...

"...Are all Nigerian writer's virgins?"

The rate at which our country people dey drop sproglets I wonder why when we write it it comes out... errrrmmmmm well odd; like say we no know wetin e be.

Is that all you have to say? Villageboi, abeg scrutinize the script and tell the OP about his strengths and the things he should work on.

He posted his script in the literature section but I asked him to post it here because of seasoned ppl LIKE YOU who won't spare words but at the end of the day help one to improve in the craft.

Read the script again and write your epistle abeg

@OP, I was very tired yesterday night. Would read your work today.

Villageboi ooo....thanks for sharing the videos

I heard Chloe Grace Moretz was on point as "Carrie". The trailer is okay and lol@ "Call Carrie on *******" at the end of d trailer. Lyk criosly? With wat I just saw her do in d trailer? Abi I don call am ni.

The second video made my morning. Lmao! What a "Carrie remake"! The prank was well-planned. If na me be customer wey see dose tinz, me sef go fear fear oh. Lyk for real? All the customers fell for it.
Nice one.

Someone shud come try it naija...I am sure the responses would be far more hilarious.

^^^^^^ Lol. Nice one @.

*Starts dancing skelewu*

Baba mimo mimo mo wa sope o.....modupe (2x)
Ore to se laye mi o po....modupe (2x)

Mo dupe ore igba to ti bi mi....modupe
Lat'omo owo titi dakoko yi....modupe
Egberun ahon ko to yin o oh....modupe



*Continues dancing*

Shouldn't this be in the religious section

Hmmm....one day, it would be me.

Congrats Dangote, our pride.

Luciandos: So you noticed too?

Of course. I wonder how ppl comment just based on the thread title without actually reading. Mgbeke journalism.