₦airaland Forum

If you cant chew the seed, the watermelon seed could also be blended with the melon. Try that and you would be amazed how easily the juice will go through with the seed unnoticed.

This is so..so...sad. My heart goes out to their families.

victorlexa: A counter attack is happening, you pass the ball to Mikel, he takes the ball and lays an egg on it

Epic! Laughing and hitting head on a wall and fell off a mat into fire.

Eagles so uninspiring. Kai! They have really lost it. Wish them all the best all the same.

There is nothing spiritual about the man that cheat on his wife but rather a habit learnt over time. It is a thing of the mind. The flesh would always crave to be satisfied; the man is not under any obligation to satisfy its cravings. The difference between the men that cheat and those that dont is SELF CONTROL.

Any measure to put this virus in-check is welcome. On a lighter note, imagine a typical village man like me who may not have heard of Ebola getting to town to carry out a transaction at access and faced with the hand washing ritual, he would naturally think a feast is going on at the banking hall.

Our learned colleagues should know better. Do they think the bokos will willingly reveal the identity of their sponsors. The former Army Chief gave them fire, only I had wished he was there till now, the bokos would have been singing a different song. SAS initially had a hand at their formative stage when he was the governor, but the sect metarmophosed into an uncontrollable monster after the murder of their leader; Yusuf. The NBA should just save themselves the embarrashment, I thought they were supposed to read in between the lines?

Modu or is it GAS or SAS should just shut up already. Story to the birds. Nigerians are too wish for this.

I really got to know the effect of his song last weekend at the Garki modern market in Abuja. I had just paid for a chicken, while I waited for the boy that does the killing and cutting to return with the chicken, a woman with a very big back side came to negotiate to buy some of the chickens. She and the seller could not reach an agreeable bargain. She left, as she was walking away, the aboki chicken seller put one hand holding his groin and another on his head and was bending down intermittently raising one of his legs from time to time singing 'UKWU'. I had wished I recorded the scene, it would have made an instant hit. Shege ukwu ( in the aboki's voice)

The NFF wahala seems to have taken the shine off the match. Wishing the SE victory on Saturday.

The NFF wahala seems to have taken the shine off the match. Wishing the SE victory on Saturday.

Marriage is the union of two entirely different persons coming together to make a home. Marriage is a full time job that requires commitment, mutual respect and understanding between both couples. No be bread and butter o! But I assure you one thing; by the time both couple get it right, my! My!! My!!! You are both in for some sweeeeeell time.

Can we at this moment celebrate our spouses?

Can you tell us that special one thing that you so cherish in your spouse?

As for me we started out badly but I can confidently say we are gradualy getting to our 'zone'. We Would be 9 years married in October and we are enjoying it. I celebrate my wife's strength; She doesn't understand the word NO, always wanting to get things done and done well, it has rubbed off greatly on me. I am excited she gave me the chance to be called her husband.

What about yours?

TribalEAST: but now, women are dragging the trousers with men. I think that's one of the reasons why they get smelly vagina and yeast infection.

kia mbok am eating.

bnovative: Men tie wrapper in most tradition of ss and se people of Nigeria. trousers wasn't for men. people should rather emphasize decent dressing than abuse ladies who wear trousers. There are ladys' trousers designed for ladies.

True. There are a lot well cut trousers suited for ladies out there. Just like you said, decency is the key.

Vikky014: in Dat case all gender can wear anyfin,provided u feel comfortable in dem right?

Yes i get your drift.

Vikky014: Op,lets start with T-shirts,is it for men or women?

Unisex I suppose.

crackhaus: There are some things we need not bother about, just saying...

I actually became curious because of stern warnings sometimes issued to ladies by some religious bodies not to put on trousers to their various meetings.

Am sure the money is already been depleted. It's a slush fund. Nigeria officials getting rich from supposed crisis situation since time immemorial.

Godmystrength: I don't know too..

Hmmm........ I really dont know how it all started even to the extent that women are percieved to be wearing men's attire if they go on trousers and the men viewed irresponsible or a joker if seen wearing a skirt. Hmmmm..... Just wonder who thought out the idea.

SAMBARRY: Oyinbo pipu

The pipers(men) from Scotland go on skirt.

You are the one doing the marrying and you alone know how you feel. From your post I can confidently conclude that you agreed to out with him because he has got the cash and money. If both are not there tomorrow, will you still stick with him? For me I see nothing wrong in taking it to the next level. If you take no offence spending the money and riding in his cars, then take no offence or be ashame marrying him. He never asked to be delivered a dwarf, and since he has been able to achieve this much inspite of whatever decriminations faced by dwarfs, give him a chance to walk you to the alter. Like it or not, people must talk, but you have your life to live.

Studying the culture and people of time past, you will realize some used animal skin and leaves as covering. Correct me if I am wrong, even in some communities today, some still go on leaves as covering without differentiating what is for man or woman. In some cases women go around with nothing covering their waist up ( try that today at your own risk).

How did we arrive at abscribing the trousers to men and skirts to women? Some religious group forbid women from putting on trousers and even run the risk of being labelled an 'Akwuna' (borrowing the words of my Idoma brothers)

Does any one have an idea?

It is the lack of trust and insencerity between couples that has brought the marriage institution to its knees. Men should stand up and be the anchor in their marriages. There may be instances where you will get what you didn't bargain for irrespective of your good intensions, but that notwithstanding, fathers should stand up and take the lead. Reading through some of the post portrays the wife as just the other person in the union. To a large extent, husbands push their wives to where they are now being labelled as the one in the union not to be trusted.

One incidence that happened some years back got stocked with me for a long time. This couple had 7 kids. The man a rank and file officer with the Nigerian Army and his wife a vegetable seller. The woman pratically took care of the family with the help of the kids who sell some other items like fufu to support the income from the vegetable sales. The man of the house is known in most popular joints at the mammy market (popular market in most Army Barracks). Where he opened a 'savings account' with the salary he collect. He misbehaved one day after being drunk, his first son landed him some series of slaps. With all the man's careless attitude, the woman was her caring self. The man took ill one day and was hospitalized. The woman sold practically all she could lay her hands on to save her husband's life. It got to that point that money became an issue and the husband was fully aware of because he was still able to communicate. Unfortunately he passed. Guess what? All the while the woman was running from pillar to post seeking how to raise money for his treatment, the man had 7k in his pocket and died with it. At that instant, the hate for the husband grew and she stopped crying. You can only had imagine what would have been her attitude to her husband afterward if he had survived the ailment.

LaRoyalHighness: Number 7 is my problem..

It takes a lot of self discipline to overcome this, especially if similar offenses do occur in future

donpeey22: Ok. That means i would have to cut all supports for the boy and his mum and have him withdrawn from school next term so as to focus on my family alone. Thanks for the advice.

My brother, you do not need to discontinue what you have started if they are within your means to carry. What you where advised about earlier is that your immediate family is your primary responsibility, and if God has so blessed you, it will not be out of place to extend some assistance to others, in this case, your late uncle's wife and son.

Blockus: [b]LAWYERS in the house please correct me...


Last time I checked:: If your your child is under the age of 18, they cant inherit a single thing and in the absence of a Guardian, your estate MAY be taken over by the Government.

Now if the Mother is still alive, your estate wold be handed over to the Mother who is the legal guardian of the Minor to hold in trust for the child pending when they reach the legal age of 18.. (so last last, the woman still controls your property)..

If the Child is 18+ (meaning youhave been married to the same woman for 18 plus years) and you die and leave her with nothing to live out the rest of her life, rather subjecting a Mother to depending on stipends from her child to survive, then that Man is cursed even beyond the grave..

And what makes you think that the Woman would not marry someone wealthier than the man?!




I still maintain that if a Man does not pass on his estate to his wife or leave his wife a sizable portion of his estate for her to live off of, then that marriage should end whilst everyone is still alive so the woman can put her effort into a marriage where she counts.

The above suggestion makes the womans contributions in the marriage look trivial..





NOW!! What if the Woman has all the Money and properties, is it okay for her to leave them to her Kids and have her husband live off of the handouts from her kids?![/b]

You conclusion got me thinking. What is good for Bulus is is also good for Bala.

Nashville: I have my wife as my next of kin. I married her because I trust her and in case of any unexpected events, I know she is best able to take decisions in the interest of my children. And besides, my wife does not need my money to survive. She earns a living and can survive on her salary.

But if you think your wife wants to kill you, it's better you get a separation than live in fear. Why are people sooo scared of their spouses?

I am with you on this. Mine is also my next of kin. She will always be available to cater for the kids incase of any eventualities. Let the kids wait and get married.

There are also numerous cases of men using their Fathers and brothers. There was a similar case of such that happened at my wife's place of work last year 2013. After the man passed, making his father the first option and brother the 2nd, the wife and kids where practically left in the cold. The office had to own their own frantically enter into some form of agreement between the father and brother for his wife and kids to be able to collect some stipend..

Marriage defiled mathematical solution of 1+1. In mathematics, the answer is 2 as we all know. But in the marriage equation, the answer is 1. Do the man and the woman see themselves as 1? Or is the union viewed a marriage of convenience which only exist to bear children.

The reason for this thread is just to sample our opinion as it relates to Next-of-Kin status as it relates to the woman in the marriage.
I work with the Public Service and have had the opportunity to go through several documents of men who have been married for years with children
but simply deliberately refused to include their wives as next-of-kin, choosing rather their children.

I was able to sample the opinion of some and one reason that seems prominent with all revolves round suspicion and general lack of trust towards their wives. Do you as a husband Man, share in this suspicion? And as a wifee Woman, how do you feel to know that your husband do not feel comfortable making you his next of kin?

Marriage is hard work. Great marriages are even harder.

So, what are some things that make great marriages soar? What keeps them going?

Here are some few thoughts.

1. Let differences work for them:
All couples are made with two different people. No two people in the world are just alike. In marriages, I’m convinced opposites often do attract. But great couples learn to build upon those differences. They build upon each other’s strengths and let each other minimize their weaknesses. “Two are better than one”—the author of Ecclesiastes says—and great couples live this truth.

2. Extend grace for the minor annoyances.
Can we just be honest? People do stuff that gets on our nerves at times. That’s true of all of us, even with the people—maybe even especially with the people—we love the most. Great couples have learned not to let those little things distract from the major things—like love and commitment.

3. Serve each other.
There are no 50-50 splits of responsibility in a great marriage. Great couples learn to sacrificially serve one another. In the best relationships, it would be difficult to judge who serves one another more. There may be times one gives 100 percent, because the other can’t give anything. And there are other times the other spouse gives 100 percent. And neither complains when it’s their turn to give all.

4. Prioritize their time.
Great couples spend time together. Life is busy for all of us. These couples schedule time together. They find things to do that each of them enjoy. And they say no to other things that would keep them from having adequate time together.

5. Keep no secrets.
There are no hidden issues among great couples. They are vulnerable with each other. Both partners open themselves up to the other person completely.

6. Publicly support each other.
Great couples are supportive of each other in public. They don’t tear each other down in public. They handle private issues in private.

7. Keep no record of wrongs.
Great couples learn to forgive. There aren't any lingering issues that haven’t been resolved.

I feel the need to emphasize with the understanding that it takes two people—both committed to making the marriage great—for any of these to work. There are some people who would give anything to make a great marriage, but they are the only part of the couple trying. I get that. A one-sided commitment won’t work when attempting to bond two people into one great couple.

But when two people are willing to work hard, a great marriage is within reach. For all of us. We should work towards great marriages, and break the cycle of divorces that seems to be holding sway.

Marriage as an Institution is filled with land mines and the ability of both couples to understand and agree to work together to maneuver these land mines, and even managing the rife that may result from detonating of any of the mines is essential. It is always not an easy situation as married couple, but when you make up you mind to want to make it work, the home would be better off for it.I believe the man has a huge role to play and in most cases are the ones that triggers most of the mines at home. Trust me, a woman that has decided to get married to you and you treat her right; you are guaranteed long life to an extent and a peaceful home. I do know of few instances of craz.y situations of irrespective of what the man does, the woman still look out, that not withstanding, they are few in number. This may not be pleasant to the hearing of some, but women are in most cases loyal and more faithful to their marriages, hence are able to remain steadfast (I dont know of boyfriend/girlfriend, but on married couples).

NOTE: This is no battle of the sexes .

As a parents, the best you can do is to impact those positive morals right
from the start; say even from some few months old ( i.e a little tap on the bom of a child who bit the mummy nipple while sulking sends signal to the child that such act would not be tolerated) What you are impacting should be in areas of clothing, relationship, mannerism, how you talk to your spouse and others etc. All these traits should be what you child see you do on a daily basis, so
this becomes part and percel of the child.

Children learn more watching you than taking in the advice that you give them.
What they see you do go a long way in influencing their character that would subsequently mold theirs. When they may have
inculcated these positive character learnt overtime from what they have experienced at home,
it puts them in a better platform to stand up to all those vices they may encounter outside especially
as it relates to peer pressure.

There is this positive trait that I noticed in my Daughter very early enough which probably she has copied from
my wife, her mother. If she wants something, especially having to take a snack from the refrigerator or an item which
is not hers directly, she will go to the extent of even waking you from sleep to request for that ( growing up
as a child I never did this, I in most cases snick to get what I wanted and hide to eat it; trust na! I grew up
in an Army barrack ). Even if we need to denial her of any, we tell her the reason why. She does same things
on items shared at school from any student celebrating birthdays; she keeps it till she gets home and
even at home she will seek your permission before going ahead to masticate . There are other traits we are helping
her to develop but for want of time here.

We as parents can do our own little bit and hope that our children when away from home follow through holding on to those
tenets learnt from home. Those tenets stands as a constant reminder when faced with challenges of taking
a right or wrong decision. As David said in the book of Psalms 119:11 to God: Your words have I hidden In my heart that I may not sin
against Thee. Selah