₦airaland Forum

Softboy001:
....life has been difficult to say the least, ever since I moved to lagos after finishing my nysc in March, I thought hoped things will be better but it only became...
Well let's leave that. I just want advice, that's why I am here.am currently squatting with my elder brother and his fiance in a room and palor self con. They are getting married by December. I have alot of burden to them, they don't need to tell me I know. But what will a man do. I forgot to add am 27 years old. I studied mechanical engineering (HND). My hands are really tied right now. I left a crazy job(30k/months) that I was using to sustain my self. Don't judge me, am not lazy. I left because of security reasons. Plus It was a slave kind of work. Presently am hooked. I don't know where and what to do. I currently don't have up to 5k in my account self. As I no gree do yahoo aka jazz. Na wetin my eyes dey see be this.

...any way my gist is getting to long. There is an man that has always been a father to me. He helped me through school. I really thank him. As in he has done alot. The man just like me for no reason.and has been helping me since I was young. Anyway he called me and then after explaining to him how things has been for him.

He called again after a month. He said he has a deal for me.

The deal is that, he wants to sponsor me to go to canada. I forgot to add, he stays in Austria. Him and his family. So the deal is about 2.5 million naira, so he said he going to work everything for me that includes international passport,visa, airplane ticket, accommodation and also the package includes work also. but the deal is that. He will pay about. 850k. To get me there first. Then when am there and have started working I'll pay 1.8 million to the agency $4k.

So that's the deal. The 850k he is just using that to help me.actually he himself he paying 650k to the agency and giving me 200k as pocket money. Then when I get there I can work and give the agency the remaining 1.85 million.

So please guys, what to do you think. My fears is going to a country I don't know anyone at all, there is so much risk involved canada far o and will I be able to pay up the money. I don't want to owe gbese that I can't pay back.

What do you guys think?
Should I go ahead? Or remain in naija?

I have so much fears, that's why am scared of going, what if I go broke?

I have from now till Monday to decide, the processing is starting on Monday

As long as there is work guarantee, you should not entertain any fear at all. There is risk in everything we do in life, so go for it.

passionguy:
but if he is been arrested and jailed won't it affect the family image

Which image?

Your picture or any other person's own in your family and his are the same? Look he is a unique and separate individual and should bear the responsibility and consequences of his actions along!

Modified: When he started earlier within the family, you guyz didn't give him the right treatment, caution and correction but still, he is an adult and responsible for his actions.

passionguy:
but if he is been arrested and jailed won't it affect the family image

Which image?

Your picture or any other person's own in your family and his are the same? Look he is a unique and separate individual and should bear the responsibility and consequences of his actions along!

Klass99:
The comparison was to illustrate how helpless a 22 year old can feel or be, without support or a good network of people.

Of course I know she's orphaned I mentioned in my own response as well. I am far away from Lagos at the moment and being pulled in different directions it's a miracle I haven't lost my sanity .

Me, coming here is for comic and stress relief. I don't mean this thread specifically but NL as a whole.

OK, I understand. It is a very difficult situation to be helpless in a disorganized and disoriented society like Nigeria.

As for your busy work schedule, the Lord is your strength, take care.

Kirchoffs:
She is a student in NOUN, and she does small chops catering jobs by the side during the weekdays or whenever she's not going for lectures . But she told me the catering jobs only come once in a while .

An idle hand is the devil's workshop, She has been searching for work to no avail even if it's sales girl in order to earn more, it's very complicated sha, I once even advised her to defer her admission for a year at least so that she can be financially capable to handle it.

Laslas everything na money matter, as soon as I get to Lagos I'd be able to see what I can do. Thanks

This is good. She is on track. Tell her to spend less time in that house most especially if the man's target period is day time. But if it is in the night in her room, she must summon the courage to resist him and raise alarm as been exposed that way will make it impossible for the man to deny it.

Klass99:
Chisos Steven

At 22 please where were you and what were you doing?

At 22, I was in my final year about to finish school and get set for the next chapter of my life....made possible only by good and responsible parents - remember this girl doesn't have parents.

At 22, I had no income generating skills or ability like I currently do. But, I had wonderful people willing to help, guide and educate me - she doesn't have any of that.

At 22, I was over the legal age for most things but still not grown nor mature, emotionally, mentally, spiritually and otherwise to tackle life properly. But, I had a good network of people to tap and learn from, as well as my own experiences to live and learn from - she doesn't have much of that.

At 22, I wasn't street smart the way I am today, neither did I have anyone making life miserable and traumatic for me via rape, but she does!

Are you seeing how a 22 year old can be helpless in a situation like this? Our life circumstances differ, so while a 22 year old Bukola may have it good or be in an enabling environment that will help her thrive, a 22 year old Aisha may not.

22 does not mean fully equipped to do all things and succeed.

@ Mmadu, I asked a former colleague about those organizations, will update when I hear back from her.

Klass99

All your points are valid.

But like you said, at 22 you were in school! That was the reason why I started with "is she in school"?

All my series of questions why based on two premise: Too available at home that is not gainfully engaged on something reason why the man have access to her when others are not around and two, if she is not schooling, she should get engaged on something and hence be able to save herself from a situation like this in due time.

NOTE:
Please don't compare yourself with her in the sense that your parents were available for you and hence you gradually followed the normal route but in her case, she is said to be an orphan. This should toughened her up and motivate her to be focus and hence get a bit independent as early as possible. You get it right?

Modified:

Klass99 please get in touch with the op and connect with the girl cos I believe you can be of great help to her.

Mmadu2:
Precisely the reason why she can't talk. She has nowhere to go. She can't even afford a cheap camera phone to film the incident. That explains her plight and why the wicked man is taking advantage of her.

What is she currently doing?

Going to school, learning a trade or skill?

I'm just wondering why a 22yrs old lady will be so helpless in a situation like this. If she is currently not doing anything, let her settle this aspect as quickly as possible. At least, she will be able to get herself a small android phone with which to hustle for the evidence. Otherwise, she may still fall into the hands of another predator guy all in the hope of getting a help.