₦airaland Forum

iceberylin:
That's Wah the say online....
Bug z different offline.

classicB:
Where do I even start from Is it from numerous cases of rape that get turned against the woman??

I remembered back then as a novice in 100L visiting male friends didn't occur to me as a big deal. I can vividly recall 3 cases of 'escaped' rape.

The first guy was touching me awkwardly and I did resist him, though he later told me he could have had his way.

The.second case looks like it too but the third guy already held me tight against his bed thank God he heeded to my pleading and allowed me go.

What if one of these 3 guys turned out to rape me? I'd have been a victim of rape, and worse of it would be that nobody will believe it to be true, especially the guys, they'd probably say things like "she seduced him" "she initiated the sex" "she brought condom along" "no evidence since nobody was there "

I put it to you guys that an average Nigerian girl have been a victim of rape/escaped being raped simply because she went out innocently to pay a visit to her supposed 'trusted' guy friend.

This doesn't make sense no more, if we can't trust our Nigerian brothers then who can we trust?

This same guys come here to complain about girls coming to visit them with loads of friends, why won't we come with loads of friends when we know there's a condom waiting to be used on.us

I have personally stopped visiting guys since 3/4 years back, it's either you agree to meet me in my parents house when everyone is home or you meet me in an eatery

I read it here sometimes back when some guys were making gest of a girl that claimed her male friend tried to have his way during a.visit I dint believe my eyes when I was seeing comments like "did you expect prayer session with him?" "you think he wants to preach abi?" "you think you went there to play games?" so these guys now see it as norm to rape an innocent female visitors?? One way or the other they just look for excuse for raping a girl only to turn it against her.

I don't know what it feels like to be raped but I do know what it feels like to be 'near rape' it's nothing good, it drains you emotionally and psychologicaly. Most of these raped victim get scared of telling close relations because they are using all their energy to get back what is lost, i told nobody about what I experienced either.

Idk what else to say, but i know prevention is better than cure. I pray God deliver us from these animals disguised in human clothing

This kinda thread needs to be on fp
Mods should do the needful

coolestrogue:
Take your worries to God almighty, He alone can see you through. There is nothing lalasticlala and ishilove can do, the best they can do is to take this to the front-page.


What you passing through is just a little of what Joseph in the Bible went through, read that portion of the Bible and find hope.

Houseofglam7:

Lordave:
I won't run cos I've gotten a money saving sex machine. From that day henceforth, our dates will be in the abattoir where I'll order a basket of okpukpu ewu for just #1000

crazydove:
Abeg which cab/taxi is N50 in Nigeria.in Lagos is 3000naira and above.in abuja is 200naira.is keke that is 50naira even bus is 100naira.
In abuja,Lagos,Warri,PH,Bayelsa,Uyo,Enugu etc you won't see house of N4000. And prices varies in every state.Go and do a good research.

coogar:
strolling under the hot sun & chewing roasted corn? hahahaha - he won't be getting laid ever.

angieberry:
"They weren’t raised with the mentality that the home is a private place. So even if they just met a lady they are interested in, they can hang out at their house as a first date – with no ulterior motive involved on their part."
Ebelebe! These men know what they are looking for! Any man that tells you to come to his house, especially if he is not a close relative, is simply suggesting activities that goes beyond eating , talking and watching movies and hanging out. And if the girl agrees, in the man's mind, she has agreed to take part in those activities.
How many men will not try to get fresh with a lady when they are alone in his house? Biko, let me hear word. They should just accept the fact, and no decent or sensible young lady will want to visit a man alone. Too risky!

swagloverss:
It was intended to be a simple PM on my BBM but the number of furious replies I got indicated that I had to expand my reach. The said PM was – “Naija men with come to my house, come to my house.” Is there seriously no young man who can advise his fellow men on dating etiquettes? Help us plssssss”

I sincerely felt that I was alone in this predicament till I started getting pings from people who were even more angry about it than I was. And then I realized that this is a general epidemic.

Now, I had different responses from people and I will attempt to put those responses into consideration and not be too streamlined with my views.

Most of the males who responded to my PM agreed with the fact that their brothers are not representing the male folks as well as they should in this area but one of the men made a case for our culture being the reason for this predicament.

According to him, Nigerians do not see the home as a private place and can invite just about anyone into their home. He also talked about the mentality that has been deeply ingrained in us – some men just don’t think that going on dates is necessary, or rather, “we can meet up at my house, there’s no need to go through all that white culture ish” (paraphrased)

As much as I understand where he was coming from and I agree with him that the Nigerian mentality has a lot to bear with this situation. I also think that there are two reasons why the “come to my house issue” is so rampant today.

(1) Some men just don’t think that it’s necessary to go through all that stress in wooing a lady anymore.

A friend of mine actually said that chivalry is dead in response to my PM but I am a positive person, so I refuse to believe that there is no single man on this earth who knows how to take a woman on a date and win her heart slowly – no, there must surely be such men left on earth. (yes, I am rooting for the male folks)

Some Nigerian men just believe that all that “taking a woman to a lovely restaurant and stuff” is for “oyibo people“. I mean, you will be surprised at the number of educated men who would invite you to their house at first meeting.

The man who inspired my PM is a lecturer. Another man who contributed to my cry for help studied law as a first degree. He is involved in media and publicity for a while, and is a called pastor… so you can go figure out the thing about education being a way to raise up people with a modern outlook on things.

(2) 80 % of the men who invite ladies to come to their house at first meeting have no good intentions at heart.

Now, I have to be very careful with how I say this, because I understand like my male friend stated above: that for some men, inviting a lady to their house at first meeting just doesn’t mean anything to them.

They weren’t raised with the mentality that the home is a private place. So even if they just met a lady they are interested in, they can hang out at their house as a first date – with no ulterior motive involved on their part. So yes, I agree that those kind of men exist.

We don’t need to go deep down into stories do we? Or maybe we do. Listen carefully and you will hear stories from the lady who has true stories to tell on how she had to fend off SERIOUS sexual advances just because she believed a man who said he had no ulterior motive for inviting her to his house.

Some of our female friends won’t open up to us but some ladies have been raped because of the “come to my house syndrome”. They cower in shame and guilt, berating their selves that they should have known better than to go to his house. And the society doesn’t make it easy on them too.

Most people would say things like – “Why did you go to his house? That’s a sign that you wanted the sexual act to happen” So the victims keep quiet and bottle up the hurt and shame inside.

What about the guy that tells you to just come into his house while he dresses up so you both can go out and then, under the guise of that excuse starts drawing close for a kiss?

So the “come to my house syndrome” is a serious one. Aside from the serious underlying issues of ladies who have had sad stories of sexual assault and rape to tell, it also begs for a total overhauling of the way some Nigerian men view wooing a lady – an overhauling of faulty dating mentalities.

If the woman was to be a street lady, we might pardon you, but no, you see a decent lady with her worth shining through and you just don’t want to put in an effort into treating her like the jewel that she is.

What would it take for you to take the natural order of the way things should be in cultivating a relationship with her?
Would a time out at a restaurant be too much to ask? It doesn’t even have to be a classy restaurant – just a neutral place where you both can talk that’s not your house.

So I plead again, don’t we have young mighty men of valor who can advise their fellow men on dating etiquettes? Men who can organize classes and teach their fellow men these things – if it comes to that.

Or maybe I should be pleading with our churches too. Almost every church organizes programmes for ladies on how to be virtuous women, how to behave themselves while on a date, etc. Can’t such programmes be held for men too? Women aren’t the only ones who need to be groomed, men need to be groomed too.

So gentlemen, I sincerely still believe that there are a lot of you who are getting it right in the area of what I just talked about.
Please teach your fellow men about these things, we will be absolutely grateful to you all.

Signed,
The community of ladies who are tired of the “come to my house syndrome”

SOURCE

Uniquexty:
Exactly what i had in mind. So after every action, the friend (in quote) returns with tales. You see why the girl laughed. Immaturity

bushdoc9919:
Depends on what you mean by happiness.

To me...happiness is the state of inner contentment...that is not dependent on your feelings, or your personal fortunes.

It has nothing to do with riches, or the absence thereof.

saaedlee:
With cane or what?
Minority Party Beat APC to Produce Speaker, is that what you mean?

ideology:
if you have not called Gej clueless before, then you deserve to reprimand him

Freemanan:
NFCS does dear

Pineapp:
Her dressing like CRK teacher.

The last pic depicts how deeper life girls dress when searching for husband.

traction:
Nigerian Democracy Is A Time Bomb And Bukola Saraki Is The Judas Iscariot Of Nigeria By Dr. Wumi Akintide

President Buhari‘s insistence that he was not going to interfere on the affairs of the Parliament is a major gaffe any way you slice it. The Parliament, as stipulated in the Nigerian Constitution, would determine whether or not his change agenda would fail or succeed in Nigeria. As a Political Science major with a deep passion for politics, I can tell you that.

The PDP began to irredeemably fall apart the day their own Speaker of the House, Tambuwal began to show more loyalty and favoritism for the opposition party, and there was nothing the PDP could do to bring him to order before the situation got out of control. Only in Nigeria is that kind of disloyalty tolerated in a party official. It is true that the Speaker of the House must be neutral in his dealings with members as much as humanly possible, but the ‘river that forgets its source or origin’ as reminded us by Elemure Ogunyemi, the Ekiti country music idol, is bound to dry up sooner than later.

Tambuwal got away with his disloyalty because he figured out that he could only be removed as Speaker by a majority of members in his Chamber, and nobody else, as stipulated by the obnoxious Nigerian Constitution. Unwritten ‘laws of decency’ should have required the Speaker to do the right thing without being told, but because politics in Nigeria is all about self rather than the ultimate interest of the Nation and the institution, Tambuwal got away with his perfidy. Not only that, he went on to be called a hero and a consummate politician in a country where corruption has become a virtue and a way of life.

Everybody in the PDP knew he was to all intent and purposes an APC member, but the PDP and President Jonathan were in total denial. Tambuwal kept that advantage until the very last moment when he publicly admitted he was going to be the APC Governorship candidate in Sokoto since he could not run for President. He won the governorship election by a landslide. That could only mean he had been rooting for the APC long before he made it official.

Even though Goodluck Jonathan tried to shake Tambuwal up by using the Inspector General of Police, Abubakar Abba by withdrawing his security details and the official cars and drivers assigned to him as Speaker. Tambuwal went to Court to challenge the move and won on legal technicalities. The PDP went into the last elections totally embarrassed and humiliated by their own Speaker, legislators like Bukola Saraki and Governors like Kwankwanso and Amaechi who openly decamped into the opposition APC. In his own case, Tambuwal only stopped short of openly crossing carpet into the APC. He was widely known to have been holding nocturnal meetings with the APC Caucus while still claiming allegiance to the PDP.

The House of Assembly in Abuja under the PDP was a House of Commotion, Intrigues, Horse-trading and Bribery if you get my point. Even though Nigerians massively voted for change on March 28 and April 11, I can assure you that nothing has changed and nothing is going to change in Nigeria for two important reasons.

First, neither of the two major political parties in Nigeria today have any verifiable ideology that explains their value system and political leanings. Neither of them operates the kind of party supremacy that is so critical in every Democracy. Once the Party takes a decision, no member, however powerful or rich can change it, whether on the floor of the Parliament or anywhere else in Nigeria

The Action Group under Obafemi Awolowo became the powerhouse that made the Western Region the pace setter in Nigeria among its peers like the NPC and the NCNC. Rich individuals like Pa Alfred Rewani, late Pa Ajao and Pa Shonibare of Lagos were moneybags in the same Action Group, but they all had to abide by what the Party says. Even Awolowo, arguably the most conscientious politician and strategist among our leaders, knew he could not achieve anything as party leader without party discipline and supremacy.

Awolowo initially wanted to make free education in the Old Western region both ‘universal’ and ‘compulsory’ but the party settled for universal only. Awolowo had no other choice because the party was supreme. If Awolowo, the party leader, could do that, no other member could challenge the party and remain in the Action Group. Awolowo was that strict. It was not like the “animal farm” of today where a deserter from the PDP like Bukola Saraki would not take no for an answer because he is hell bent on becoming Senate President to gain immunity from public prosecution for atrocities he committed with “Societe-Generale Bank“ a public institution he plundered.

I don’t blame the APC for accepting “leprous” Saraki into their fold. The APC was like a drowning man that would cling to a snake at the time it accepted Saraki, and the gamble paid off big time in Kwara State, if not the whole of Nigeria. They must now deal with and tame the monster or suffer the same fate as the PDP suffered in Kwara. Saraki is a true son of his father. He is in politics not to help humanity but to laugh all the way to the Bank for his own benefit. As Saraki has become Senate President, forget it. That is the end of Buhari’s anti-corruption agenda.

I have cited the above examples to show that neither the PDP, nor the APC that dethroned the PDP for the first time in more than 55 years in Nigeria has anything other than selfish interest at heart. It is a complete outrage that Bukola Saraki, who destroyed the PDP for his own selfish gain is attempting the same thing in the APC. Saraki is just like his twin brother in crime, Ayo Fayose, the current Governor of Ekiti. He is the Judas Iscariot of Nigerian Politics.

Ayo Fayose, the outlaw Governor has got away with murder in Nigeria, so to speak, because Goodluck Jonathan’s policy was to join the rotten eggs of Nigerian Politics rather than beat them. Fayose openly encouraged the PDP members in the new Senate and the House of Representatives to muddy the waters for the APC and cause confusion by voting en masse for Sola Saraki as Senate President.

He has the effrontery to do that because, under the Jonathan government, he completely outmaneuvered the 19 APC legislators he drove out of Ekiti so that the 7 PDP legislators could continue to do as they liked with him as the overall boss. One would have expected the new APC Government to have paid more attention to Fayose and what he was doing in Ekiti prior to the APC’s victory in the last election. The APC dropped the ball on Fayose, who took advantage of the APC’s silence and ineptitude to wait out the 19 legislators till June 6th when his new set of PDP legislators took over the Ekiti House of Assembly.

I have completely lost confidence in the APC and President Buhari for being so sluggish and slow at doing what was expected of them. I could not understand the strategy of the APC to put Ayo Fayose on notice that his antics in Ekiti would no longer be tolerated by Buhari. They were supposed to hit the ground running, but grew so careless that Ayo Fayose treated them like amateurs in Politics. The man beat the APC arms down in Ekiti, if the truth must be told. He definitely put “Okaraba Baba Edi“ on the APC and juggernauts like Ahmed Tinubu. The wizardry of Ahmed Tinubu has been rubbished by Ayo Fayose.

I agree that it is true that there are more urgent problems to tackle than facing Ayo Fayose, but I condemn the APC, President Buhari and Vice-President Osinbajo for completely taking their eye off the ball in reference to Ayo Fayose and the ugly developments in Ekiti.

I am also amazed, if not totally shocked, that one week after Buhari’s inauguration he still has not found the time to issue a statement on the 60 Nigerian officers and soldiers awaiting execution for not fighting Boko Haram with their “bare hands”. Boko Haram was fighting Nigeria with tanks, armored vehicles, AK-47 rifles and other deadly improvised bombs like what Biafrans call “Ugbunigwe” during the 1967 to 1970 civil war. These soldiers were expected to face this people with prayer and fasting. That is just wicked.

It is unconscionable that Buhari, a retired 4-star General has not seen the need to issue a statement on the fate of those brave soldiers within a week of his inauguration. The cowardly Chief of Defense Staff and the other heads of the Army, the Navy, and the Air Force who worked with Goodluck Jonathan are still there, enjoying their loot from Jonathan. Buhari looks insane to me right now to keep quiet and not say a word. Many, if not all, of those officers should have been let go immediately.

It also beats my imagination that the same Buhari, up till now, has not said a word on the fate of Captain Sagir Koli, who blew the whistle on the covert operations that helped Fayose rig the election in Ekiti on June 21. Brigadier-General Aliyu Momoh, the commanding officer of the operation is still in the Military, while Sagir Koli has had to runaway from Nigeria to avoid assassination or victimization by his commanding officer. Yet, Buhari still wants Nigeria to believe he is the Messiah, coming to save Nigeria. If you believe that crap, I have an island to sell to you in the Pacific. Time is of the essence. Buhari is damaging himself irredeemably in the court of public opinion for all of the above.

I was one of the strongest supporters of General Buhari during the election and I still support him, but disillusionment has set in for many of his supporters across Nigeria and for me. I am not so sure any more from what he has done in his first two weeks in office. I am more worried today about his silence than anything else. I know there is a limit to how much he could have done in 2 weeks but he should at least have issued some statements to assure Nigerians that he is not totally lost or overwhelmed by the sheer enormity of the problems he has to confront.

I suggested to him more than a year ago, that he needed to set up a Rapid Response Team to draw attention to many of these lapses, since he was not avid reader of briefs sent to him. He should have had somebody looking into social media to compile information and advice he needs. The Sahara Reporters of New York is a major resource that he cannot afford to ignore. If he is in any doubt, he should talk to his friend, Pastor Tunde Bakare, who visits the website every day before breakfast. Buhari is losing momentum and I deeply regret that.

Buhari has told us enough about Nigerian problems. What Nigerians want to hear now are his solutions to these problems. I am not talking of solutions that would require the involvement of the Senate or the House of Representative or the Judiciary. I am talking of solutions that he is able to do with executive orders. He should make himself and his Vice President a shining example of the change he wants to see in Nigeria just like El Rufai and his Deputy Governor have done in Kaduna State. They both declared in their inaugural address that they would both accept a 50 percent salary cut until further notice.

That Buhari is yet to name a single member of his cabinet and principal officers close to 2 weeks after inauguration is proof that the man is not ready for prime time. I am saying it out loud because I want the man to succeed. I can tell you right now that what Buhari has promised to do in Nigeria cannot be achieved with the level of sloppiness and lethargy he has shown in his first two weeks in office.

He offered Nigerians a sartorial list of the problems he wants to tackle but he has not articulated the ends, the ways and the means for solving those problems with any comprehensive strategy. What he is trying to do cannot be done with his current level of commitment and drive. It is sad to say but it is the truth.

I fully understand that Buhari is trying to convince his critics he is no longer the maximum dictator he used to be as a military ruler but he is doing it the wrong way by looking weak and incompetent. By openly telling Nigerian he would not interfere in what is going on in the Parliament, he became spineless.

I would not be complaining this much if I saw some convincing evidence he really wants to strengthen the supremacy of the APC. I see no evidence of a guiding ideology that should influence all of Buhari’s decisions. I see none of that and I think the observation should be of concern to all Nigerians like me who voted for change on March 28 and April 11.

The APC won 59 seats in the Senate and the PDP won 49 in the new Parliament. The APC won 213 out of the 360 seats in the House of Representatives leaving the remaining 147 to the PDP, the APGA and the other parties in Nigeria. If you compare that margin of victory with what normally obtains in stable Democracies like the United States, Britain and the State of Israel, you will all see that the APC has a majority that is comfortable enough to be able to effectively and successfully govern Nigeria. What if the margin of victory for the APC was much smaller? The APC has no excuse to give right now. If it fails it will have nobody but itself to blame.

I don’t care about the horse-trading currently going on in the Parliament. The bottom line is that the legislators sponsored by the majority party must be seen to have won. That it did not happen is a bad omen for Nigeria’s nascent Democracy under the APC.

I don’t care how the APC and Buhari do it, the duo of Saraki and Ekweremadu as Senate President and Deputy President is as a major humiliation and defeat for the APC, and more so for Buhari and Osinbajo, and a bad omen for the interest and future of Nigeria.

I rest my case.
http://saharareporters.com/2015/06/09/nigerian-democracy-time-bomb-and-bukola-saraki-judas-iscariot-nigeria-dr-wumi-akintide

handsomeclouds:
what most of you don't realize is PMB will be our president for the next four years. Buhari's religion won't allow him do what you want us to spot. I'm not a fanatic, but I won't critisize others for their beliefs. Besides what has handshake got to do with good governance? What did the clueless one achieve despite all those he shook hands with round the world?

saaedlee:
APC!!!

A win for him is still a win for our dear Party;APC and it is an indication that this country is moving forward unlike previous assemblies when we have "selection" instead of "elections" for NASS Speakers!

Viciyus:
FIRST OF ALL YOU ANIMAL,

SEE AS HAIR FULL YOUR HAND, MUST YOU COME ALL THE WAY HERE TO NARRATE YOUR STVPID STORY,



YOU WON TELL ME SAY SINCE ALL YOUR LIFE, YOU NEVER SMELL FOR ONCE?


COS YOU FEMALE ARE THE MOST SMELLIEST, DIRTY IRRITATING THING, BUT AS A GUY WILL OVER LOOK ALL THIS THINGS AND KEEP OUR COOL.

NO WORRY, COS NOBODY DON TELL YOU SAY YOU DEY SMELL.



ONCE YOU DON CLOCK 30 YOU GO FIND EVEN PIG TO MARRY BUT YOU NO GO SEE ANY.


KEEP ON BEHAVING LIKE AN ANIMAL, TIME WILL TELL,


TIME WILL TELL




TIME WILL TELL

Midehi:
quite understood but rolling on the floor in the office

Freemanan:
Well, I definitely cannot bring the fuel price down for all NLs and I also can't provide 24/7 power supply. I ain't Federal govt.... I can't help you from being banned and I can't improve your e-welfare here on NL... I got no level to do such... But here are the things I have been doing as an ordinary member and will continue to do as Mr NL when voted as....

1. I will continue to impact positively with my posts / topics and correspondence.

2. I will share sensitive information and knowledge deemed appropriate by NLs..

3. I will continue to maintain a post-Nairaland relationship with fellow Nairalanders which has been a hobby (my followers can testify).

4. I will stand as a tool of utility when needed by any member regarding assistance under my capability.

5. I will entertain, dialect and entice NLs and guests of NL with my wits and funny maxims.

Silver and gold, I have non. The aforementioned 5 canons are what I have.

I am Freeman David / FREEMANAN and I am contesting for the Mr. Nairaland pageant...FREEMANAN

Your votes, my joy @ nairaland.com/freemanan


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CSTR2:
What is there to lighten up about?
Hundreds of people are being slaughtered in your country everyday very cheaply or is it because you are fortunate to not be affected YET.
Corruption and northern supremacy has turned your country into one of the worst places in the universe.
The people there have no defined future and you think you have a country.
Everybody will get wise one day, but not everybody will get wise on time.
Like i said before, intertribal marriage does not hold any weight.
It is irrelevant.

Barselonia:
I just Downloaded the Godwin video and everything about the video is Okay But the only thing that amazed me is that dancing step of korede bello...

What name can be giving to the dancing step, we know skelewu,itigi, shoki and the rest...

can we call this odoyo dance.

CSTR2:
If you believe something as insignificant and utterly myopic as nigerian inter-tribal marriage can save your country, then you must be the most optimistic human being on earth.
Look at the countries that have splited in the past, they all have inter-marriages.
So inter-tribal marriages is irrelevant in the grand scheme of things.
The women in this inter-tribal marriages are probably going to be affected the most.

Truckpusher:

Truckpusher:
You see why I don't respect women - They can be bought and sold by the highest bidder.

Tell me if this girl wey her eye dey shine like policeman torchlight so marry Osho for love.


Listen up boys , anyday any of them biitches open up their treacherous lying mouth and say to you that money isn't everything ,slap her mouth and tell her to sharrap.

mcgaius:
Why is she leaning on Dele Momodu is she not in love with oshomole again?