₦airaland Forum

remsonik:
His anger should be used to justify the slap, yet after the slap he couldn't have a rethink and still had the effontery to beat her up again??. Do you still think she would have gotten over that in 3 months?? babe a boyfriend or fiance is different from a man you have a child for o

Lemme tell you she can never forget the pain
Cut the babe some slacks please, the guy can talk here since it's easy for him but the lady won't find it easy to move on.
@the bolded, Do we now have to use physical abuse to justify verbal abuse??

Why did she go further to insult him with everyone asking her to stop to no avail, did she tell you she didn't hit him too? I know you'd say a man hits harder but that's just bull.

Who's fault is it that she has a child?

Verbal abuse is just as bad as physical abuse, in most cases sef, verbal abuse brings about physical abuse, so yea, they are pretty much the same, so if you decide to stay with a man who would hit you for insulting him especially because he can't keep up with you in that department, then that's your fault.

cococandy:
we know how parents treat girls who get pregnant outside wedlock.

They are judged loose and irresponsible.
This man who got her pregnant who should be supporting her in her predicament is calling her irresponsible and saying her parents abandoned her because of her irresponsibility while he was the architect of the so called irresponsibility.

Cold.

Seriously though, why do you clamor for equality when you want to be treated differently in some aspects? How is he the architect of her irresponsibility? Is she underage? Was she raped?

coogar:
this is what i call objectivity.
it saddens me when women who ask for equality cannot own responsibility of their bad behaviour. she was as abusive in the relationship as he was.

Yea, they were both abusive, I remember him saying she reached for things with which to hit him, locked his shirt and things like that. You don't do all these and turn around to say he abused you.

yagbaboy1:
All these stories for the gods self. One thing that always amuses me when these chick's say they have moved on is the fact that whether you like it or not the fact that u were bleeped by the person will forever remain in the dictionary of ur pussy

Two people have sex mister, the fact that she fecked him will also forever remain in the dictionary of his d1ck, thank you.

remsonik:
But this woman has an account since 2014 and saw how he shamed her on this forum. I dont think she's verbally abusive to have restrained herself from commenting on his thread and also opening her thread more than 2 months later.
What do you do when you respect and worships a guy so much that he starts to walk all over you?
yes she's angry and whatever words she's using to describe him now I wont really blame her much because she gave so much of herself to this guy and he doesnt respect her or treat her with any dignity.

How do you know she didn't just see the thread? If she actually replied this way immediately to his thread, I would be cutting her some slack but to still sound like this even after two months(assuming she saw it since) says a lot, 2 months is enough time to calm down and think.

You are using her anger to justify her words, why then are you all screaming that he slapped her? Doesn't he have a right to also be angry? Why can't his anger be used to justify the slap?

If she actually worshipped him, she won't sound like this.

Many of us know Debrief and her story,that's a victim of abuse, this OP doesn't sound like a victim abeg.

Wedon:
It's easy for him to appear calmer and cooler on Nld . . . What does he have to lose afterall?

He is a man and will just go right ahead and live his life . .

She on the other hand, is stuck with a child out of wed-luck for a man who not only beat her senseless, insulted her family. Abeg we are all humans, lets not pretend that is not enough to drive someone insane.

He may not have called her names . . . but what he did is worse. Imagine opening a thread on Nld and watching you ex talk (calmly) in details about how he beat you up!

Can we not do the "he is a man and she is a woman" thing? I don't like to think like that, it makes me feel like a hypocrite and I hate being one.

She is stuck with a child because she wants to be, she is an adult who got pregnant because she engaged in unprotected sex with a man, she wasn't raped, so why use that to score points?

He didn't just write how he beat her up, he wrote what led to that path which the OP didn't refute, please understand that I'm not making excuses for the guy but I'm actually beginning to understand what men mean by saying "women use the excuse of being women to get away with so much" this is actually true to an extent as can be seem from so many posts here.

He knows she's on NL yet went ahead to write that thread, he was never ashamed to reiterate that he loves her in all his posts. We are all human ofcourse and I can understand the OP feeling hurt but she's too abusive, she could have passed her message across without all the insults but she just couldn't, because that's how she is, just like the dude said.

Rose2014:
I beg to disagree o
This guy rants more than a woman
Don't let him sweet talk u like he did op and started mocking her and her family

The guy is worse than a beast and op is lucky he didn't kill her
Imagine his rants to his father in law, talk less of the lady in question

I smh in disgust for him

Where was he ranting? I already called him out on saying he wouldn't say disparaging things about her family, yea that's just saying, "there are things about your family but I'd rather not say them" but still. isn't that better than actually calling them names? He has his faults but it's not fair that you all are supporting the OP, totally making it seem like she's faultless because he hit her, what do you think a woman like the OP would do when "quarreling" with her man?

mcdokwe:
Sweetcocoa I didn't harass any of her friends neither did I find them sexually appealing. Yes, I said I enjoyed the sex, yep, after my silence wouldn't make her keep quite. I still couldn't match her and for my own sanity have forgotten all she said and that was long before the so called beating.

Okay, You are not totally without blame, I will keep saying I'm a woman and that's to lay emphasis on the fact that I understand how most women behave especially when it involves a fight.

One thing I agree with you on totally is that you can and will never be able to match the OP word for word, it's just not possible except she didn't write what I read. It's just that since you hit her and many don't understand that verbal abuse is as bad as physical abuse, you will forever remain the beast for hitting a woman.

She didn't refute all your claims, she's just trying to tell us why she did what she did which is leaving me confused because you are saying you didn't do all those things.

One thing is clear, this woman does not respect you and is very immature, how can you call the father of your child all those names in a public forum?

You on the other hand deserve some strokes of the cane for letting it linger for so long, and you sound like you did her a favor by being with her, that must have affected her self esteem and further damaged her, you two should stay away from each other for now atleast.

I'm a woman but can we leave sentiments aside for a minute and try to be realistic?

Having read both sides of the story and now kinda confused because everything is still not clear, I must say that, the OP must be very very verbally abusive, she doesn't sound like someone who respects people at all.

Yea, she's hurt and all but is this how to vent? Why all the names calling? I don't remember the OP calling her names in his thread, he wrote that she deserved the slap(which is wrong) because she wouldn't stop with the insults and she's here proving him right.

I'm not supporting the dude o but this babe no try at all.

mcdokwe:
Like I always say, even though you would and continue to insult me, I'm not about to say disparaging things about you or family here.
Thank God you are here finally and would hopefully state the truth. Even though I don't remember which friend you said I harrassed, I remember I had to sacrifice my relationship with the so-called ex to be with you, I remember how you tried your best to be friends with her and moan that I leave her, she was at an advantage but loved you and came for you, thankfully she was wise and gave me all the support to be with you instead, but remains a good friend whose impact in my life can't be overstated.
The post you refer to wasn't a pity party or a plea for you to come back(I've done that, don't regret it and like I said to you, I'm proud my ego didn't stop me) it was rather an advice to people out there not to create reasons for others to hit them, I only tried using my story to pass a message.
I remember saying I said some words but never could match you in words, saying I used you to explore sex was one of them but the least I could say as sex was explorable and we both explored each other.
It has been making the rounds that I insulted your dad to his face, lol. I won't say I didn't because I talked proud when I should be ashamed I got his daughter pregnant. But for those that would discern, I got a shocking call from your so called pastor, and then your dad that I shouldn't do anything I might regret, both sounding as though I had plans to harm anyone when the only thing I asked was for you to come so I could see you and my child and go back to base, I didn't understand but having wished to get across to your dad without success, I figured that could be my chance to sort out things with him and then offered to travel to meet him so we could sort things out, but your dad said I shouldn't bother coming but should rather wait till more than a year to try again. In that fit of anger (admittedly stu.pid) I asked if he expected me to abandon my own child like he abandoned you over a year and that was the insult.

Seriously dude, I was one of the people who saw reasons with you on your thread and that was because I felt you were being honest and now the lady is here saying these things about you, seriously where do I start from?

You don't remember the friend or you never harassed her friend?

What do you mean by you won't say disparaging things about her family? This statement has already said all that needs to be said.

You sacrificed a relationship to be with her, I don't get it, was she in competition with another girl over you?

You actually said you used her to explore sex? That's just really low man, as in is her side of the story all true?

bestestgirl:
it is for real, the guy is even around, check around pages 8 and 9

Okay, thank you darling.

Miraijj:
Can you remember one heediot's thread where he was like, "I hit her, I regret it, She deserved it? Na me be the 'she'.

You see that beautiful woman, babyosisi, I don't know her from Adam neither did I run into her back in my days at Eden, God really imbued her with rare insight to see beyond the surface.

And those who think I need deliverance,I really do. Why don't I,when I allowed that sickled demented fellow into my beautiful life.

Ask him, he'ld tell you that a hundred cloned persons that are his exact lookalike no fit reach my feet!

That guy has got talent. He writes well, but Mba! No! He no go gree use am well. Na to dey flood NL with rubbish, dey look for who im go invite im pity party.

Ehen! Back to the matter on ground, I used to physically abuse you ehn? Anu! Do I have anything to tell you? Never! What do you even expect me to do with an expired entity? Bullshit am big time!
So you didn't tell the world that you took a two months plus baby to a neighbour's house about nine poles away and hurried to the market to buy milk and baby carrier because you didn't want her to suckle my 'stupid' breast. Okwa ya?

Why didn't you tell the world you were sexually harassing my friend in my presence when you thought I was deep asleep and it happened that she slept over?
Why didn't you? Why?

So you told a girl I was an ex while we were together because you were trying to chat her up on whatsapp?
My friends hate you to the end of the world! Yes! They couldn't imagine their friend (me of course) doomed for life all in the name of marriage nzuzu. I was too blind in foolish love to see what they were seeing.

And you thought you had totally gotten me especially with my having a child for you? Oh boy you lied big time!

Everyone calls me wicked! That I left this fellow because he is moneyless! That's their damning business! Do I owe them an explanation? Never! All those times I was hungry while heavily pregnant because of misplaced and ill-timed love, I was just being a fool,I was!

You know one thing about this type of fellows? They have a sweet deceptive tongue! So what do I do to protect myself from them? I use my brain, make more than enough money and learn to act like a mermaid.

Chai! I felt like poo poo... This guy would tell me to my face, "thanks, you taught me to explore sex". He would even call me an irresponsible girl whose parents abandoned because of her irresponsibility!

So you could call a girl you once dated to come sleep over and you had the effrontery to tell me?

He would tell me how I was vulnerable, and how he was the only person who could love me. You don love me finish na? I believed him. I believed I was responsible for all the problems we had.

Why would you talk to me anyhow in the presence of others in the name of being 'frank'?

I became a nervous wreck. Jesus! I was totally losing my self worth. A terrible part of me I never knew was there surfaced.

And to even think that this dude told me to write down everything about him I would love to have changed... In my mind I was like, "why would I when I would just waste my time, merely baring my mind for him to see, just as he had been using everything I call secret against me."

So as you can see, I no longer have any secret. I am as open as a newspaper, so you just seat tight, read and yes, enjoy, if there is anything enjoyable!

Then he insulted my father to his face! Chai! That was the last straw!

FINAL WARNING: If you send any other bastard sms to me again, Amadioha go reshuffle your fingers!

Life's more fulfilling and more promising without you! Oshi!

Wow! I'm speechless but seriously, you could say your piece without sounding so I-dont-even-know-what-to-call-it.

Una problem no be small one at all.

Seriously what's happening here? Too many pages to cover. Coogar, cococandy anyone?

bestestgirl:
hehehe, unfortunately for him, OP has called on Amadioha to reshuffle the fingers he is using to type all those things .

Let me also call on all those people who contributed seriously to that thread, make they come read the part two!
CC
dheartless
sweetcocoa
Genbuhari
owliver
greatgod2012
Kimoni
Rose2014


...and the wife batterer corrector himself
mcdokwe

you are all welcome, free popcorn for all

Is this thread for real or what?

Talius:
u sound very pissed

I was after seeing the movie, but not so much now, this is me just tryna 'pen' down how I really felt.

The Dakota babe didn't do it for me at all.

Dude is just crazy ni, if I were the attendant, i'll tell him we no longer use the old one, rubbish.

lastpage:
Yea, plausible in a "man-hater's world"!

Infact, any EVIL against a man is explainable... for peeps like you.

Agadi Nwanyi


Lastpage!

Seriously? You think I'm a man hater? You've not seen me condemn evil/bad women? People like me, what does that even mean?

There's no shame in being an agadi nwanyi btw, every normal woman prays to be one someday.

Logicalmind:
heck! I'm not discriminating. They can have sex for less I care.

Being gay is not a choice but having sex both heterosexual and homosexual is a choice.

I guess a gay man or woman is choosy about his partner and that makes it a CHOICE.

Okay, now you make it clearer but that's just you.

Ben carson and other homophobes however, don't mean it like that, they are making it sound like gay people can choose to be straight.

The woman's explanation is plausible, why still say she set her hubby ablaze?

Logicalmind:
I'm not homophobic but there's something Dan Savage should understand.

Having gay or heterosexual sex is a choice but the feelings of attraction is inborn.

Just as a priest or anybody would choose to remain a celibate and in actual sense, it equates them as asexual but it's not so because the heterosexual and homosexual ones would still be nuturing the feelings.

Even if Ben carson decides to suck his dick, it still doesn't make Ben a gay because gayim is defined by attraction which is inborn but engaging in the act is a CHOICE.

It's a choice it's a choice you all say.

The attraction is inborn according to you, what would you have these gay folks do? They are attracted to people of same sex which is how their body and brain works, should they remain celibate?

rokiatu:
Seems like I am the only one here who likes Andre I am a sucker for good acting, I don't just look at how likable the
character is.

I don't like the character he plays but he's a good actor alright.

3cycle:
I thought we were heading for the altar but honestly I give up. The relationship is not working. We have been together for a while before he moved to another state so basically it has been a Long distance relationship for 6months now.

I am hot tempered and he is the calm type, he has been able to tolerate me for a long time but honestly I think he is the reason why I have been this way.

Since January I have been BEGGING to come visit him, he said january, later he said feb, later march and now he has postponed it to April? Infact he said he needs a leave before I can come. Who begs to come visit her boyfriend? Who even needs a leave before his girl can visit?

Secondly nowadays he nolonger calls me only at midnight. He said he doesn't buy airtime in the day time because he spends more airtime during the day so he prefers to buy at midnight so he spends less calling people. Infact nowadays he is always on the phone whenever I call him. One day he ended my call to call a colleague of his at 1am who lost his dad. I asked if he couldn't call the colleague later in the day and he said no that the colleague might not be reachable.

The last he did was that he did not call me for over a week, he knows I have been having issues at work and I haven't been paid for 2months now. Infact I was broke. I had just tfare, feeding and little amount to carry me for a while before I was paid but all those while he nevr called to know how I was doing.
He later chatted me to ask why I never bothered to contact him. I think LDR isn't for me, I am done. I am sooo done

Let him go, that's what he wants.

I can't imagine myself begging a man to come visit him, he's not into you sweetheart.

I'm loving this show, the music is really good and I love jamal, I don't like Andre, he is just like his dad but man, cookie crazy for sure.


Lucious is just evil.

One of the most boring movies I've seen, it would have been better to just download a BDSM porn and just kuku watch the thing well, mschew.

Just carry a hand sanitizer with you , it's kinda rude to decline a handshake, especially if you are meeting someone for the first time.

blaizze:
I need advice on how to break up wit out problems I have tried everything I can but non see to working. I tried ignoring, tried discussing with him but he always gives a 'good' reason y we should continue the relationship.

I cant continue being with someone who is so petty. I initially thought that the problem was from me but now I know otherwise. He doesn't want me to have male friends, very controlling. I have tried sitting down to discuss things with him but it's not just working out.

Just this evening I stopped to greet a male customer and he just started shouting saying he will start keeping female friends too n whatever happens I should just take it like that and that it will only lead to break up. I tried to explain and calm him down to no avail so I allowed him to continue boiling, lol.

when he finished ranting, I went to him and told him that there's no need to be scared and that I will never do anything to hurt him. The dude just said "now that u are having male friends when u go for nysc u may start sleeping around". I just left him and didn't reply.

so when we were going back home (he was actually walking me back to my house) he was still talking about it n I told him that I don't have the strength to quarrel and if he doesn't want to let the matter slide he better start goin to his house. He left n I had a peaceful walk home. When i got home I called to find out if he hadn't gotten home and he told me not to call him again. I jejely ended d call, I don't have airtime to waste.

This is what happens Weneva he sees a guys nota me on my phone book or watsapp. even facebook messages sef he will still want to check. He it's always paranoid. God knows I have never cheated on him before. Once he told me that if I get pregnant he will go for a dnt test o cos he doesn't trust me.

He found it really difficult to introduce me to anybody in his family until last year when we had a serious problem.

He is not as bad person though. Some other chic may be able to endure all those things but not me. I cant be giving explanations about things that shouldn't be explained.

I have done everything within my power to make it work but it just isn't working out. We argue everything week and if St's really exhausting. I am really tired of the relationship. and want to know if there's anything else I can do.
And i want advice on how to make someone believe you actually want break up. am a soft hearted person and always ready to please people as long as it's within my power.

cc:babyosisi
chair cover
cococandy

Please I beg you, continue to run for your life like you say you would.

Your bf is emotionally abusive, it's only a matter of time before he becomes physical, give Usain Bolt a run for his money biko.

Idowuogbo:
Oya chop it

I'll buzz you later

Okay dear.

That robotic thing wey dey ban people don ban freecocoalario.

Some human beings sha, you have a complaint and was told to forward it to the appropriate body(ies)and you 'paraing' like that's an insult? Smh.

And I thought he had some sense.

The lady was even reaching for weapons with which to batter the OP, if you can hit, best be prepared for what follows afterwards.

What is it with some people saying, OP took her for granted because she bore his child, lived with him outside wedlock and all? Please is the child not also hers? Did she not partake in the $ex they had? Did it all happen as a favor to the OP?

How can you people be making it sound like the OP maltreated an adult who chose to live with a man she isn't married to? Was she held against her will? Does she not have a brain? Can't she decide for herself?

Please you people should quit making it sound like women have to wait to have everything handed down to them, haba!

zeb04:
Your sermon is out of guilt.

No matter how much encouragement you get here from your fellow guys,you still feel guilty! Deal with it.

After the blows in your house,You still shamelessly fought in your relatives house.

You are a mental case nd you shouldn't be with any woman til you get helped.

Seriously, you need to stop sounding like you hate men and try to be objective.

Being a woman is not license to misbehave.

NemzySeries:
u jst made ma morning by asking a sensitive question to d blind......pls manage dis ma "Happy New month"..ure d 1st getting it 4rm me

Thank you, happy new month to you too.