This fellow is another University accident waiting to happen, his parents sent him there to hunt for wisdom,instead  he's lost himself in the hunt for cunchas! Find true control before it is too late!!!

oyinda.:

no man is going to come to you and say "i've been maintaining and controlling my wife for 5 yrs" that is just impossible.
so you guys are prolly just young idealistic men looking to get laid. and there is no problem in that.
your "maintain and control" can only last for a few months max. 'cause it's all silly games.

the only advice is to be true to yourself.
do you have rules for making your friendship with your best friend last? are you trying to control him/her?
the only times u make rules like this is when you are being paranoid for no reason, or if you're trying to force a relationship that's not natural maybe due to benefits you're trying to get from it (getting laid/ social status/ what not). in which case, going out with a girl you don't love will be ideal. then you are left unscathed when she ditches you. or even better, you get the chance to dump her for another with a happy smile   because you definitely won't be married to a her for 10 years if your planning to live your marriage by rules on "how to maintain and control a woman"
you have to find someone you can be yourself with.

this thread reads as if women are aliens or something.
kinda like a student trying to form a superficial relationship with a professor in order to get a good grade.
natural relationships form naturally. superficial ones will always need rules to sustain it and keep it together.

best post.

I've said it severally that most people tend to judge this thread all too often by the title which I admit wasn't rather well chosen. Control is not about playing games, or turning your woman into a zombie or being a monster. It's about controlling yourself and your actions so she doesn't control you. People say you can't plan the way you handle love, that's a romantic and idealistic lie, people learn to drive, ride a bike, have s-ex and everything else, there's nothing that stops you from learning to love - the right way. We can't all be jumping on couches like Tom Cruise , without women seeing the opportunity to take advantage of you.

Since this thread started, I have received numerous emails, from guys in relationships or out of them who state that it has truly changed their lives. I had even abandoned this thread more or less, until a couple of emails convinced me otherwise.

To those who keep talking about games, yes artificial control is more of a game, it takes a bit of planning here, scheming there, which is why I don't advocate it much. True control on the other hand is a way of life and once you achieve it, it truly works. Lose control at your own peril.

harakiri:

In spite of all that has been said on this thread, only a handful of women have had the courage to drop a comment or two which proves that ALL of what has been said here is true!

Nuff said, doubters of the principles of control, take note!!

Davidylan, I concur with you, he makes some very valid points that count as true and perhaps even an entire section on mastery of the topic of " from artificial control to true control". Same thing with pro01 who has a number of insightful observations on the matter.

Its important to get the entire perspectives about the whole topic,my point is that all this is a stepping stone towards the final goal, one route out of many which should nevertheless be treaded with care.

Richfella,

Like you rightly said as well, Lions make the rules, the rules aren't made for them because they see their prey for what it is, inferior. They control with superiority and strike fear with their presence. Goats don't hang around when lions make their presence known. A lion doesn't hide under the cloak of sheep. Others may pretend to be lions, a lion pretends to be nothing else.

Women know when a man of true control is around and some will even go as far as offering themselves without prompting or without too much talk.

The goal is to be a lion, not a cub playing lion. Lions will only retreat when they encounter a superior obstacle such as an elephant herd.

Why approach these women the way a lion would treat a superior? The way a guerilla outfit would attack a superior army? For sport, it may be fun to strategize and conquer, but the problem is that one finds himself all too often, excited by this activity, until chasing and plotting for women becomes a permanent addiction and you have no time to plan or plot for your financial future.

Wavemasta noted that water was formless, yet he still noted that water crushes what is beneath its power and moves across what it cannot overcome or chips away with persistence.

The goal with women is not to make them an obstacle you waste valuable manpower and time trying to overcome for even strength has its limits, the goal is to confirm yourself as a lion of sorts, an emotional superior, ready to control the situation and make the rules of the relationship.

Never make a woman a long term obstacle you try to overcome, lest you find yourself losing control without knowing it. A man of true control should be focused on achieving success and realizing that while women are a part of life, you should not as a rule make them the cornerstone of all you do.

Artificial control is always easier than true control and the idea is to strive towards maintaining true control in our lives so we can deal easily with everything else we encounter, women inclusive.

Pro01 and Richfella

I understand what both of you are saying, which is essence that through artificial control you can gain temporary true control which you can later make permanent. But understand this, this approach can be used for one particular woman or will require you to adapt to the whims and caprices of various women in order to gain what you want. Format A for Jennifer, Format B for Aisha and you have to go through so many phases, it is almost like you are planning a conquest.

Why I advocate permanent true control above all, is that a man of true control, controls himself first then other women second and with true control, you don't have to be bothered about adopting one style or the other to fit a particular woman, you become the embodiment of control that all or most women find attractive. There will be no need trying to change this or that about you because women are not necessarily your priority, you become your priority first and women second, which is why you don't accede the their demands the way a no control man does.

Adopting artificial control strategies each time so you can get temporary or in future permanent true control over one woman, works no doubt, but are you trying this for a one time fling to get one women or a couple of women or do you want the true control thing to be a permanent thing in your life, something that becomes part and parcel of you? Something that your attitude needs neither crafting or excessive modification per conquest but commands the attention of the right women? That is permanent true control.

Lol, I'm glad it helped

pro01:

@Tai2,

Yo, while I agree with you on most points I think theres a little problem with the 'artificial control' bit. If a guy keeps spending lovingly & foolishly 'cos he wants to maintain a woman's love for him, well that may be the 'artificial control' bit. But if the goal is to METHODICALLY create an illusion of generosity and financial buoyancy as a strategy to gain entrance into the punanis, then that is effective 9/10 especially for Nigerian girls. After phorking them you can then reduce or stop the spending and move on to "true" control (that's if you want to continue with the love-peddler sef). Naija girls rarely open their holes for broke asses that's for sure, lets not get it twisted.

Spending money especially for someone who has it in limited quantity is a short-term solution to the problem. This is why men pay for prostitutes because money does the talking and gets you want you want, which is a solution to your need for some Behind. If you are spending for short-term gain it is still artificial control, because any girl that was attracted by your rate of spending will continue to expect that spending or require it periodically.

Whether she stands on the street corner or not, if you're paying to get it, it's artificial control. Why pay for it when you're giving her the chance the be with the best thing since Adam was created?

--190--:

Tai2,
whats the best way 2 deal wit a lady that u once dated and u guyz broke up years ago~

since u be HITCH!

It depends on the situation, is she back begging or what?

2sexy, my yahoo mail id is femi.subair@yahoo.com

True control starts from self-control and restricting your impulse to give and say everything because you're in love with one woman.

You must be a man of no control:

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria?topic=396243.720

Control is the only way. The way of mugu is no way. Those who have eyes should read.

Kini big deal, you got the girl in the end, whether or not there was a bet involved is relatively unnecessary. Even if she finds out tomorrow, so what?

The price of a wedding is all relative, 100 million or 1.5 million or 150 thousand, it depends on what you can afford. I don't see why people place so much emphasis on 24 hours when the real problem is coping with a marriage, kids and everything else that comes with it. Nigerians are simply not practical, this is why you have many unmarried women looking upwards to God for help because they spent their younger years thinking life was a movie. Marriage is about oppressing their friends and family members not building a future with one guy.

Would the money wasted on champagne and food for guests not be better served in an investment that will benefit the children and the future of the marriage? Even celebrities these days are known to have low key weddings. Jay Z worth close to half a billion dollars married his own wife in peace and quiet, with few guests and no press but no your babe wants to inform her whole petty village that she has arrived. I really do not know why you're bothering yourself, its your own money after all. If I was you I'd kick her ass to the curb, spend the money on a good apartment and watch the serious babes that come flocking even ready to marry you in a registry with only two witnesses, utter rubbish.

Tomorrow they'll say men are heartless.

She knew she'd been sleeping with her boss before she got married. She should have aborted the baby first chance she got and saved the kid and other parties the potential misery.

Better still she could have done the unselfish thing and opted out of her marriage knowing she hadn't settled matters with her boss. Then if she had the kid no one would blame her.

No, she had to lie, cheat and deceive and put another man's life in misery and they're still talking of sorting stuff out with the boss, when the offended party is someone else.

Young men of nowadays and lack of work. My friend find something useful to do with your time!

Derivatives , hedging and other newfangled methods  were what ultimately led to the downfall of these banks in the U.S. You want to try a technique like shorting in Nigeria, with all these crooks and con men around? Be my guest. Sanusi is going after people who merely owed banks and people are here lamenting including yourselves, lets see what happens when brokers here acquire the means to sell other people's stock through shorting techniques. Nigerian investors have not even acquired the financial literacy to understand that what Sanusi is doing benefits them and the economy in the long term and here you people are advocating derivatives. God save us all.

Regulatory functions of the stock exchanges in the country is even  the function of the SEC I don't see how that is Sanusi's business, he was merely speaking about the exchange as it affects the banking system and the need for power to promote other areas of the economy. This so-called knowledge y'all are showcasing here, shows you know squat about your economy. Plus the DG of the SEC in Nigeria went to UNN and Harvard, so I don't see what the fuss is about educational qualifications.

^^^^^^^ Just to show how daft you are: http://www.abujacomex.com/.

^^^^^^^Cretin, I suppose you haven't heard of the Abuja Commodity Exchange. Internet opinion experts and their arm chair solutions to the problems of Nigeria. Sanusi knows our problem and he's said so, we need power and freedom from these rats feasting on the fabric of our economy.

Nigerians are seriously daft. Banks have been declaring false profits for years on end until Sanusi came along to reveal that it was all for show. Erastus and co were lining their pockets with billions  and hoodwinking the rest of the nation with false declarations and pretensions at piety. Now that the truth is in the open, people are complaining of Northern agenda. This is how Ibori stole money in Delta state and the same people he robbed were coming out to defend him. Have you ever seen countries were banks consistently declare profits without loss for 2 decades?

Sanusi probably shed a tear or two out of frustration with the criminal nature of these bas-tards and where the country is headed. No power, no funds for the middle and lower classes, but these people have money to buy property all over the world by ripping the rest of us off. In other countries these idiots would be in for life or death as the case may be. But this is Nigeria, where the more you steal the better chance you have of escaping prison. A man steals 20,000 to feed his kids and they land him prison, these guys steal billions and buy private jets and you give them awards and titles. How much did Madoff steal? Where are Kenneth Lay and the rest of them all? Even those guys stole money it was hard to prove they stole. The ones in Nigeria however stole money with open eye and under our noses and idiots are clapping for them.

Northern agenda my foot. Financial illiterates should get some bloody financial intelligence before posting rubbish. Nigerians are their own worst enemy. I can feel Sanusi's pain.

Jews and Muslims marry their cousins. I can give you famous examples. Whats the big deal here?

^^^^^^^^^. My thoughts exactly. The fellow is in serious "no control territory" but she likes him for something obviously. The day she leaves, he'll probably lose it.

Lol, what's the rush? Its never too late for a man to get married. But if you're really looking for a wife, try a church or something, you'll find them in abundance.

Nairaland, lol, forget it. These chicks here need a scan of your bank statement first.

Rule No 19. All Women Flirt, Therefore Assume All Women Cheat.

Never lose sleep over what the chick is doing behind your back. Just make sure she knows who's boss when you're around, its the principle of the aristo.

Give a f-uck about what they do behind ur back and they'll definitely f-uck you up. Don't give a damn about whether she's creeping about, play your bit without acting like a mugu and she'll step in line anyway.

Rat poison is your only cure.

This young man. You again?!

Forget the preachin, all wild women need to be tamed, or else you're in for a life of disaster. Quit complaining and act bulletproof, she'll come around soon enough. Take no bull from her in the name of love, if she screws up show her behind the door.

You only live once son, you have more than a billion women to choose from, why settle for less.

Broads and fronting. You know you want the brother and you know he wants you, yet you're waiting for an invitation letter. Plant a kiss on his lips and give him a damn hint for Pete's sake.