Rule No 20: Never Upgrade a Woman More Than Yourself and Never Upgrade in Exchange for Loyalty.

You for use that money pay for your own JAMB or better still you for pay for ashewo. That way you wouldn't be shedding tears here. Take heart son, it happens to the best of us.

Kick her a-ss to the curb. Abi you want to hang around until she cuts off your balls? Are you a man or what?

@OP

Take another dose of rat poison, perhaps this time you'll be successful.

You're angry because you feel like you were deficient in some way, like you weren't good enough. She didn't dig you plain and simple, that's her loss, not yours. How many billion women are there on this planet anyway?

A friend is simply a guy with some sort of social defect the chick can't handle and she can't tell him he's defective like that as well 'cos that's simply judgmental. Else, she'd have shagged you a loooong time ago. Learn your lessons and move on.

My advice? Mind yer own bizness. Never interfere between two people and matters of the heart. Na your name them go still take settle.

^^^Rather forget the ex and stick with the new guy or find somebody else entirely. Guy says has a new broad and yet he still loves you, yeah right.He loves himself more, he wants to eat his cake and have it again. Open your eyes and see whats cooking: misery!

Money usually works like magic especially where these vampires are concerned, except you're blessed with the swagger and good looks of Hercules,

akin101:

i think most females on this thread are deliberately misinterpreting tai's philosophy.
they take offense at the word controlling a woman!!! [b]I think it should have been to control lead and maintain a relationship with a woman,[/b]maybe tai's words are not politically correct but i do believe tai's words do make sense and do apply to a mans actions inactions reactions and initiatives in a relationship.

i believe women want to have their say and be treated fairly in a relationship, there is no intelligent woman who would want to marry a man below her in intelligence, she must have something she looks up to in a man, something that attracts her to that man, in a sense she still looks for some form of leadership or domination,

the thrills the highs the freedom and sweetness of being led by a strong man regardless of how much a woman is liberated is part of our instincts as a specie.

Its an instinct expressed crudely by most of our cultures but when a woman finds a man who will dominate her, lead her and take her to the place in her heart she has never let anyone enter, it can be a very heady feeling.

Thank you Akin101, I believe you have the right title there and the right idea as well: "How to Maintain and Control Your Relationship with a Woman". If I could change the title I would, but that should be the right title anyway, you get my point completely.

Typical attitude of a mugu, blaming another man for his misfortune when it is 200% clear that the woman is to blame. Your problem is that you never had true control over your woman in the first place, now she has found a young man with money control and she's misbehaving.

"He's just a friend" is the regular answer they give to mugu's. Of course, he's just a friend, you're the mugu. After all na from clap them they take start dance. The next thing you know she's finding a fault with every single thing you do and Mr. Friend will be the only one with a solution and kind words until she falls into his bed if she hasn't already. The grass is always greener on the other side. A woman will stay with a serial murderer and rapist and call him "Angel" if he has true control. If he has no control, is good to a fault and looks like Denzel Washington she'll call him a "monster" in the long run anyway.

You've been had my man, the smartest thing to do is to dump the broad with immediate effect. There's no time for nonsense. If you start accepting sh*it in your home, don't expect the flies to stay outside. She's clearly enamored with the money control the new player has to offer and if you don't extract yourself from the situation, her enamored conscience will find a way to blame you for every single damn thing until she convinces herself that the new guy is the best thing for her. You're unnecessary cargo at the moment, deadweight, a stumbling stone.

Leave her for the other guy. Let her scratch that itch that's bothering her else you're going to find yourself in a worse situation than you are now and a bigger mugu than you could be. Be wise brother be wise. As an eye-opener I advise you read the following thread to know what is at stake here:

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-396243.0.html

In the long run if you've been a good guy, her eyes should open and she'll come crying when it's all 'clear' to her and Mr. Friend gets tired of her. At that time, shine her 'pu*ssy' like a p0rn star and dump her the next day again. Your mama didn't raise no fool, shed the title of 'mugu' and open your eyes. Life is too short to play second fiddle to men of true control, become one yourself.

It's this sort of woman that poisons her husbands' morning coffee. Send the biatch on her way with immediate effect, that's what I'd do.

mito:

If I asked it's because it wasn't enough for me, but anyway I'm waiting for Tai2 comments. Thanks!

Hey mito,

Sorry about the delay in posting, I've been on some other stuff, I only just popped in to drop a response to your problem. Basically the guy in question probably wants to get laid with no strings attached and is being a player about it. If he's good looking, he either has a girlfriend or he doesn't. If he didn't have one or at least a constant love interest, he'd get to the the darn point and make a solid offer instead of playing games with you.

You've clearly told him you're game and you're open to listening to whatever he has to say and he's still playing the friend dance and offering dumb excuses and sending text messages about "being friend's". Does he think you're still in grade school, lol. He wants to leave the door open for eating his cake and having it later with no commitments, if he wanted something serious he wouldn't be on about playing friends and all that jazz. Move on like the Greyhound Express, life's too short to be messing about with people who don't know what they want.

Sometimes I wonder what the difference is between these women and regular pro-st-itutes because in both cases theres an exchange of cash involved and it's all the same end-game.In the end, pro-st-itutes offer you a better deal, they bend over when you request it and aren't out to drain your bank account or try and run your life while they're at it.

Some fool-ish men here are paying money to golddiggers without even getting 10% of their money's value simply because some weird Nigerian notion makes them feel these women are giving him something special that they have to pay them a salary for. These women have become specialists in earning two salaries, one from their jobs and the other from boy-mugu, the boyfriend. Some soulless female creatures have even turned golddigging into a full time job, collecting from mugu1 through to mugu4, while having no worthwhile respectable occupation to call their own.

If these women were golddigging with some measure of loyalty and gratitude, I'd understand, after all they say the economy is messed up, but all they do is suck suck, complain and suck like the ungrateful vacuum cleaners that they are.

These madwomen, will later open their mouths to tell you about equality in relationships. Yeah, I pay the dumb broads bills and she expects the 50-50 treatment, what the fugg do I look like - a UNICEF pension plan?

I have no problem with a Nigerian woman gold digging, just as long as she knows I'll just as easily dump her behind and move on to the next one when I'm done. After all she wants to be paid like an employee and as the boss paying the bills, its my prerogative to hire and fire as I please.

To young men still acting stupid. Check yourselves before you wreck yourselves.

You're out of luck mate, they all died with the 60's.

Tell her you want to get married and see what she says. Methinks the chick just wants a wedding and your either a.) too broke or b.) not showing signs of a wedding commitment

Ending it would have given her the time to come to her full senses. If you'd done that and given her a week, she'd have fully understood what was at play and come begging with a deeper sense of remorse. However, you've fixed the situation temporarily, the worst you can do right now, is to give her the same level of attention and care that landed you into trouble in the first place and trust me, this time when she decides to go off-board, you won't get the same reaction from her.

My advice for you now is you move into true control mode immediately, it should keep her in check. If you start acting all lovey-dovey, I've forgiven all your iniquities etc etc, believe me whats around the corner will make this particular episode look benign. It is only a child that has been visited by koboko that knows not to repeat the same action again, for the memory of the lash of the koboko shall be the child's guide anytime temptation comes calling.

Play it cool and keep her in check with the ways of true control, forget the 50-50 thing it doesn't work. Any woman with a 3 year relationship will think well before jumping out the door, you just called her bluff on the first time around something major has happened, just make sure you don't give her room to repeat such actions. Acting disrespectful towards you is not allowed for any reason, as soon as a woman starts to disrespect you, the issue of love goes out the door. Love is a transient state, focus less on the words that come out of her mouth and the tears from her eyes, observe her actions, do less for love, let her do more.

Regardless of the situation, the way of true control will keep any woman whose mind is straying towards the dark side in check. Remember this and neglect it at your own peril, go back and read that thread again and digest it. My brother, I have since them all, and if by some margin of error I missed a few women in my time, then it's the 0.1% I haven't seen. Be wise brother, be wise.

@MrBrownJay

Ou a Paris et quel type de "chassures" pour le probleme de notre ami ici?Lol

The meal is yours for the eating my brother. The chick told you she had no fiance or whatever, so that's what counts. Me, I never bother myself about the other guy, so far I get what's mine. Like my man Sauron says, claim what's yours.

Eazyman, how many of these Nairaland babes have come to this thread to tell you sorry or offer reasonable advice? But 98%of them are on other threads discussing how to eat money they didn't work for.

There are so few good ones that looking for those ones is like winning the lottery. Even the ones who pretend to be good don't have the guts to be bad or can't afford to be with their ugliness. Open your eyes and see what is cooking, true control is the only way to go. I test women just for laughs on a regular basis using money as bait and you'd be surprised to know how many of them bite. ALL OF THEM. Even the ones with boyfriends/fiances.

True control is not for younger men as you say, it is the way of the Alpha Male.Control your life before a woman controls it for you. Your 700k is gone now and you've wasted two years of your life, is that your definition of being a mature man. It's hard to swallow the bitter pill of truth but get the God will provide a woman mentality out of your mind.80% of the women on my hitlist are the so-called religious. Get real my brother and step out of the cocoon.

@harakiri

Please revert back to this thread, I made a post on your little dilemma there:

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-396243.608.html#msg5668332

@harakiri

I just located your other thread and read your story about your girlfriend that is acting like she's a free agent. My man before you do something stupid, you have to regain control of yourself first. There is no amount of sitting down and talking that will make that chick pay attention to you. She realizes she has you already and is bored like a cat looking for string to play with. Forget the fact that her family knows you etc etc, I know enough guys who have used that as a consolation when their chick is going haywire, no amount of talk from her family members will cure that itch she's feeling now. As far as shes concerned all you're saying is entering one ear and going out the other.

My advice to you is to regain complete control don't call her, don't visit and don't ask for sex. Be completely uninterested in her. If she comes around looking for whats wrong with you, give her her quit notice no reasons attached. Don't bother explaining squat to her. Just tell her you don't feel like it anymore and send her on her way. Then come back here and share the results with us. Showing her your emotions now is only a sign of weakness, asking her who she's talking to is you giving her an avenue to run a stake through your heart. Be wise, brother be wise.

Lol, what other thread are you on?

OP

I assume you are the Helper here, it shows. With this penchant for poetry, it is only natural you wash the cars that other men come and drive. Grow some steel balls man. The age of poets and hopeless romantics is long dead and gone. Invest less in Mills and Boon novels and other forms of romantic drivel and buy yourself a copy of Hustler and some good p0rn and see what your mates are doing.

Rat poison should do the trick, go for the local brand, aptly named "otapiapia" or the revised version of it called "kill and dry", just two drops in your friends morning tea and her and her treacherous ways are gone for good.

Lol, this chick is too innocent. Feeling guilty for sleeping with some guy other than her main man. When 98% chicks do it every day and clean their mouths with no feeling of guilt of shame, after all that place no get gauge and there is no way you will find out. I'm disappointed with you guys, give the babe her dues abeg. If she wants to go back to her ex she should man, she clearly likes the guy and he does too. The s-ex just happened and her remorse is enough reason to absolve her of any 'crime' she committed. Case closed.

Association of liars, see una mouth like "he will be willing to do anything for you" . The right words should be "he will be willing to do anything for p*ussy". A guy who is determined to get any woman will act any part so far he gets to chop what he desires. Back in the day guys used to plan how to lay babes the way the Americans planned Operation Desert Storm. A man after p*ussy is a man on a serious undercover mission, the finest wolf in the garb of sheep.

What you should be after is assessing the status of your relationship. Where are we headed and what do I want out of this? If you are looking for signs of true love, you'll miss the obvious and fall into a deep deep ditch.

@OP.

This bill has now been signed stamped, signed, sealed and approved .
All boyfriends, husbands and toasters are advised to henceforth take note and act accordingly.

Aristo's are just performing a social service, hungry babes are everywhere, someone has to feed them.

que??

People talking about Aliyu Gusau as the same old stock, don't have a damn idea what they are talking about. This was the same man responsible for the creation of the SSS, NIA and the Directorate of Military Intelligence . Without men like Gusau this country for don collapse tey tey. The guy is first class military intelligence, anyone who is who in the army fears him, from IBB to Obasanjo, thats why they keep bringing him back.