₦airaland Forum

What about the story written by Seun's girlfriend? What about the travails of a male secretary? you just don't want to read it because it's not nasty. but just give it a chance....i'm going to turn the heat WAYYYYYY up. . . let me pace myself. and when your eyes read, and your mind orgasms, you'll never again question my prowess in weaving a story, nor my literary talents.

this is a ROMANCE story

bump

REALITY101: Can you quit being sstupid no offense. Anyway I'm done whooping her poor lazy fat arse already. . Just for now. .

I love you too Reality.

I don't know who I would go out on a date on here. Just someone who can keep it real.

REALITY101: Can you quit being sstupid no offense. Anyway I'm done whooping her poor lazy fat arse already. . Just for now. .

you're the one who acts stupid. I have never seen a man with more mercurial moods. Is it that time of the month?

REALITY101: Yawnnn. . Fat friend if theres a second life, i wanna belong my family for the second time, why? Because we run things and things don't run us-go figure. I wake up every morning n i thank God I'm a young boss. Your welfare living ass should showing some respect instead. Uncle Sam knows my name not for sucking off tax payers money on food stamp like you n your fam rather for employing smart hardworking skinny fellas n still pay in the accurate %.

And fat friend i also run anti fat ugly lazy arss organization against paper marriage "sham" and poor arsses who dont wanna getting things on their own without the help of their paper sham marriage husband(s)

And quit acting like im scared of hearing your empty shits, pheww i just love turning your fatass around because i know that i aint far from saying the truth and it hurts u to the bone no matter how much u try to cover em up with smileys and off point weak repeat comebacks.

Enjoy your easter my fat ugly lazy arse friend more Ibs on the way

you old fart.....leave Chima alone!!!

Por que estas antipatico y zafio? Espero Ud. no feo tan obras.

No debes costezar cuando yo quiero hablar y tu quieres hablar tambien. Yo deseo terminar esta caza.

you got eyes so apparently I did. You got a problem with that rat boy?

.

onila: "African IDENTITY" saw this online

It comes, as something of a surprise to many Africans to discover that
all Africans look the same to non-Africans, How do you tell a
Nigerian from a Kenyan? And I am not talking about passports or clothing.
The easiest way, of course, is the name, for example "Ogunkoye", "Ekwekwe" or "Babangida" can only be a Nigerian; a"Njoroge", "Otieno" or "Kilonzo" must be from Kenya.

Where else would you bump into a name like "Promise", "Immaculate" or
"Patience" other than in Zimbabwe? And where do the Dunns come from?They are surely from Liberia or Sierra Leone.

Surely everybody knows that the loud, boisterous and cocky ones are the West Africans; the brooding and sly ones are the North and Southern Africans; the East Africans always say yes even when they disagree vehemently. No wonder there has been very few coups in this region.



Forget about the Egyptians and Sudanese who change their continents based on which side the bread is buttered. When convenient, and the
petro dollar is flowing, they masquarade as Arabs. When the World Bank is dishing out aid to the third world, they shuffle themselves, cup-in-hand, jostling for the paltry aid given to poor African countries.

If you want to be more specific, the Cameroonians will borrow money to buy champagne. They can even sell a hole in their pockets to ape the bourgeois.

Ghanaians are cocky, think they invented politics. No Ghanaian worth his salt will conclude a conversation without mentioning the famous Kwame Nkrumah or quoting a phrase from one of his speeches. Even when bargaining at the Bazaar, a "Kwame" phrase has a magical effect. The problem is they think that this effect is world-wide!!! A dukawalla in Bombay was forgiven for thinking "Kwame" was a unit of currency in
Africa!

The Congolese think they have the best music and the best dancers. They have this heavenly feeling that they were brought into this worldto Sing and Dance, and please, for your own safety, don't you dare challenge that! A Congolese can be spotted from afar by the gait of his walk, and it also depends on the mood of the walker: A "Ndombolo" walk is a sign of happiness (, also means 'I've just had it'); a "Baba Gaston" walk is a sign of old age.

The Nigerians have a THING about clothes and jewellery. They are the Indians of Africa; you'll always find a Nigerian in any part of the world, there is one contending for mayorship somewhere in remote Russia of all the places. There is a Nigerian police inspector in the Falklands , and there is a Nigerian cashier atthe First National Bank of Woolongong, (somewhere in Australia) I wonder how long he'll be there before he decides to become fluidywith the cash? They are like cockroaches and will be found in the most unusual places.

The Ethiopians think they have the most beautiful women on God's earth(think about it, have your ever seen an ugly Ethiopian Lady?, no,not the post-menopause geriatric one, we are talking about the under 45 or so, hmm.)

I won't even mention where about the Somalis fit for the time being as they are suffering from a severe identity crisis. How else do you explain a Somali holding a Kenyan passport saying he was born and raised in "Pand-Pieri" (somewhere in Kisumu) while the same gentleman cannot utter the basic general greeting?

Moroccans think they're French and so do the Burkinabes.

Algerians hate the French.

Sierra Leonians smile profusely. Liberians can't get over America, they copy everything including Rambo, no wonder they have Rambo-style rumbles in the jungle. Call it an influence from Hollywood?

All East and Southern African countries have more or less the same boring national anthems, but the South Africans sing it the best. Which other national anthem can make your feet lose control and do a jig on their own?

The South Africans have thick and springy hair; the Zambians and Kenyans have prominent foreheads and always smell from yesterday's sweat.


In Southern Africa when a cabinet minister is caught in a corruption scandal, he commits suicide; in West Africa he's promoted after the next coup d'etat. In Kenya, he is stripped of his cabinet post for a short while till the dust settles and then re-instated to a higher cabinet post which amalgamates his earlier cabinet post. In essence, he still controls his earlier ministerial post by proxy.

In athletics, the divisions are easy: from 800m to the marathon the East Africans hold sway; the West Africans are only good at the sprints. South Africans can only sing. But when it comes to football (soccer),the North and West Africans dominate the lesser-skilled east and Southern Africans.

Viva l'Africa!

I have no problem believing this. All of the East Africans I have run across are very kind and gentle.

REALITY101: WTF? are you that bored?

no, actually i'm enjoying myself. what chima said was quite amusing.

Mrs.Chima:
It is pathetic when a "man" is called a biatch or told to stop acting/crying like biatch more than a female.


Pappy rat, you are NO MATCH FOR ME.

ROFL!!!!! You are too much, quit messin with Master Splinter Chima!

I would hope not. Adorable Mimi wouldn't like that



and....
I'm done. it was nice chatting with you.

peace.

mimicue: Your matured enof to av a boyfriend so if you like the guy go out wiv him and make it clear to him howyour feeling now and what u want and dunno want if he loves u he will understand what ur going tru therefore wouldn't push it.. And as for you try to control urself if ur not ready and if u eventually go out wiv him don't do things dah will tempt u to do wah u will regret and I fink d minute problem is you need a man.. U need a boyfriend once u av one u will see dah u won't be yearnin for a manz touch again... And also pray for God to guide u in whateva u do... Good luck wiv dat

very good advice you gave her.

You should tell both no at this time. You obviously you need some time to think things through. You don't want to end up making a decision that you will regret later on down the line,and possibly for the rest of your life.

Tinyemeka: LOL. Nne you went far deeper than most NLers would grasp. Too many points raised in your analysis of the lyrics.

I also love rap music a lot, but my interests are restricted to just a few artistes. Rappers who flow tight, fast and whose lyrics send a message and not some gibberish just to fill time. My fav rappers: Eminem, Bone Thugs, some Busta Rhymes and I've recently started to go back to Black Eyed Peas.

I don't trip that much for those ones you'd call hardcore because I view them as hypocritical. You'd find ppl rapping about the hustle and stress they go thru on the streets, facing harassments from the police, but much of their song lyrics and videos glorify the gangsta criminal life so why should you then complain abt police harassment?

Another I noticed; in spite of all the money and fame Eminem has gathered from the game, he hardly makes noise about bling and all those stuff. But that's all you'd find from these other rappers. Why?

Many rappers who come from nothing often times feel isolated by their new found success. Through their own blood, sweat and tears they have achieved the American dream. They are rolling in all of this dough, but have no one to turn to in the midst of the adoration that the spotlight has provided them. It is lonely at the top. Partly to look cool, partly to convince themselves that they have not changed and remain true to their roots, they succumb to pressures to do all of the things they said they would never again do once they made it big. They hang out in all their old haunts, and with all of the same people.This assortment of colorful characters do not necessarily have this person's best interests at heart. This entourage may consist of childhood friends,familiar with life previously led by the entertainer, or hanger-ons. These leeches care only of the status being affiliated with a celebrity affords them. To ensure their stay in this inner circle, they become "yes men". Sadly, the rapper receives no instruction nor constructive advice.It is no wonder that they end up behind bars, or even dead, all for the sake of "keeping it real."

At the end of the day, it does not matter how much money you have.You have not been taught any better,so unless you have made a conscious effort to change,you do no better. No matter what you have now become,you still remain the same person and adhere to the old ways that only lead down a path of self destruction.

REALITY101: [I love eating toto but i ain't sure bout yours. Might wanna wash it with hot water and bleach then use some puszsy blower

that's not suprising...afterall dogs do eat just about anything.

REALITY101: Smh

why you shaking your head? you don't wanna be my little lap dog? i'll give you all sorts of treats. but only if you're a good boy. now go fetch........

yea you can, if you let me put a leash on you and walk you first.

REALITY101: Lol. . I didnt notice u deleted me. The nl adding stuff is just useless anyway. Btw what do u have to offer?

yea you right, the nl stuff is useless. All i got for you is another b---slap to keep you in line the next time you jump s----tupid .


kisses

lol nigga whatever. you better be glad that i'm giving you a second chance. you better recognize. you dealing wit a BOSS.

REALITY101: Sweetie dont try too hard to change my view on any chick weighing over 145Ibs. I am just allergic to fat n ugly chicks sorry. They scare the shit outta me. Damn how can someone live in a house with a woman weighing just about the same thing with African elephant?

I heard they snor so loud like sound of a moving metro, lazy, dirty, eat like ediot etc.

Hmm your sister is facially kinda ok. Thats 199.9ibs there

you're entitled to like what you like. just don't be so rude. yea my sister is a cutie pie. i think she looks east african.

anyways re-add me as a friend nigga. i deleted you.

Mrs.Chima:
Tisa, your sister is very pretty. Watch out for SAFO, he is a player.

Reality, sewer rat looking arse wish he had someone that looks as good as your sister. Trust.

you mean this type of sewer rat?