₦airaland Forum

Happy Easter!

#NoFreeMoneyAnywhere

hexzelle:
THANKS for your contribution, i think it might offer some help, but i don't know much about it, wondering if you do ?
if you can, i could use your assistance, which i don't expect to be free

THANKS ONCE AGAIN.

Sorry, as I am just improving/rebrushing up my VBA skills
But if you want a situation where you input 1 or 2 or 3 or whatever number in a particular cell and something happens, you can still use conditional formatting ooo.
If you are not time-barred, ask me in 4 weeks time if you want complete automation by VBA

ilemona4u:
pls how do u register for the grant?
Any link ,website or something. somebody should pls help me

I am a cluster chairman under new Theobarth NGO. I am looking for around 110 people to complete my list. You will have to send your details plus a registration fee of 2000.

Are you ready? It's real. This one is not TELPECON with stories. Disbursement date will be announced within the next 2-3 weeks after registration is complete.

hexzelle:
i used conditional formatting to get those colors on the image, but it was a manual process, i want to have it automated.

but i doubt excel automates functions.

VBA is the answer!
It's not a difficult language. If you already have programming experience, you can be productive with it in weeks.

Hmmn.A lot of those signing the petition are doing so because they think it will somehow expedite disbursement.

I laugh in grant language

pek:
tplayer
ClassicMan202
peeps4u

There is a petition against the leaders of TELEPECON. We want to get to the bottom of this. The truth must be unraveled and the billions they collected from beneficiaries must be accounted for. Please help sign this petition as many times as you can and give it more exposure by posting in all media channels.

http://ipt.io/4NSOH

I have signed, my man.

pek:
tplayer
ClassicMan202

There is a petition against the leaders of TELEPECON. We want to get to the bottom of this. The truth must be unraveled and the billions they collected from beneficiaries must be accounted for. Please help sign this petition as many times as you can and give it more exposure by posting in all media channels.
http://ipt.io/4NSOH

Hmmn. Anything to make those contemptible bastards get their just deserts and their starry-eyed donors (aka beneficiaries) see the light is most welcome.

Am all in!

hexzelle:
i'm not sure if that pix is clear
so i have uploaded the file also attached

if one opens that file in excel, there are about 25 number sets there , if one observes carefully one would find out that each set contains a number between(30-32=100%) ORANGE, i.e all 25 sets have either 30, 31, or 32
while 24 sets contains between (20-22=95%) ONLY COLORED LITE BLUE.
and also 24 sets contain between(21-23=95%)DARK BLUE.
all three are a range of 3 numbers.

but also all 25 contain(20-23=100%) which is a range of 4 numbers i.e 20, 21,22,23

my question now is if there is a function on excel or another software, where i can enter different sets like this, and choose either a 2 NO range, 3 NO range or 4 NO range and then it would give me the range of numbers that is present in all the sets i.e (100%) or a percentage basis of the ranges automatically.

@mbhs139
@Sirwallace
@Marveaux
@Ejiod

You essentially want to color cells based on individual values contained within them, abi. Example: 30-32 (ORANGE), 20-22(BLUE), 21-23(DARK BLUE), and 20-23(another colour), abi.
Then, enter 1 to get ORANGE cells, 2 to get BLUE blue , 3 for DARK BLUE cells, and 4 for another colour cells, abi

If yes, use conditional formatting sharp.

ClassicMan202:
I've read this thread from beginning to this point and all I can say is that the gullibility of Nigerians need to be studied as a course... Haba, even the supposed educated ones.

And up to the PhD level.

Before their very eyes the story continue to change, yet they continue to hold their pestilential leaders in high esteem.

Ignorance is one very big reason a country of about 200 million people has a measly GDP of $450 billion.

Iwantpeace:
yes .terminated my contract

Haha. Wise one!

Iwantpeace:
finally my money has been refunded I can now have rest of mind...

Refunded? You mean your are no longer an investor in it?

There is no grant of $700 million Dollars waiting for nonpareil scammer-in-chief Elomama. Use your frigging head!

I will drop a list a fresh lies that could emerge from the new cock-and-bull story by those contemptible bastards.

"Humble" donors(aka beneficiaries) are now starting to say that the total number of beneficiaries is not up to 44 million because of the paltry $700 million declared by those blundering bastards.


The fact that TELPECON has around just 10 million donor (aka beneficiaries) was already known to anyone with a soupcon of common sense

Good one by Elomama and his ilk.
The new tactic: let's remove CBN so we don't enter big trouble. After all, most of our donors(aka beneficiaries) are too dumb to notice, and even if they do, we will deny that the CBN story was ever from us.

peeps4u:
What if I told you that many of the so-called beneficiaries were earlier jubilating over $700m. Many of them even claimed each of 44m people could get $1m each and still have excess remaining, they were attacking people that were making them realise it was just $15.8 each and even calling them names. It took intenseand great efforts to make them come to their senses that $700m is just a paltry sum for 44m people.


If you doubt me, I can look for the screenshots from their Facebook group

Don't worry, my bro. I know. That's where destitutes of knowledge gather.

peeps4u:
Did radio stations do fact finding missions before airing MMM and many Ponzi schemes on their stations?

Did you watch the video?

AIT was merely reporting the meeting. How is that a fact finding mission?

Media house can report anything. So many MMM guiders sponsored posts and adverts on newspapers that time, did that mean MMM was real?

inks*nation has also sponsored many posts on newspapers despite being declared a scam by EFCC. Does that make it real?

This was even just a mere news reportage of the meeting, how does that transform to TELPECON being real?


As for we also applying for grants or loan, yes we will, it is never a crime to apply for loan or grants, you can also choose to troll us or anyone for that.

You're just exercising your right by promoting TELPECON and we're also exercising same by unraveling the scam behind it.



GOOD DAY

Word!

peeps4u:
LOL, another episode that will lengthen the whole drama again. So we now have 3 batches of payments from different countries out of which $700m is just one part.

Next few months will now be used to further call series of meetings on the disclosure of the remaining 2 grants.

After the disclosure of the remaining 2 grants, we now use few months to wait for the donors to come to Nigeria for environmental inspection before disbursement is approved.

This is a seasonal film that can only come to an end when the producer decides to end it.

Meanwhile, in their last kangaroo meeting, they never mentioned any "two other outstanding grants" o.

I know they may soon add "the other two" again because donors (aka beneficiaries) are crestfallen about the fact that only $700 million was declared days ago

In the video below, mama ishiba (one of the top shots in SEM of old and TELPECON today) said she had the cure for HIV. That 300 had been cured, as at 3 years ago when the video was made.

I hope you can see AIT and good old NTA there

Now do you really believe she has the cure for HIV even with AIT there?

It's called paid placement.

Timestamp: 2:30


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UF9ZxQSRH5E

AIT carried SEM too but where is that one today?

You may soon catch her "twice". Thread carefully

Melancholy:
please sir would you drop your ego and learn a little? the donors or funders are those organizations that award grants.



The money is with CBN presently but there are documents needed for the chairman to make a thoughtful plans as regarding disbursement! Mind you, we've been told to make a physical visitation to CBN most especially department handling grants to verify. According to him he was sideline at a point having spent so much personal money. so once he retrieve this document back, disbursement kick-starts.


Me still believe sey naija go better las las.

Read the above quote and you will know why Naija may remain in economic morass.

Leave that guy alone if you don't want to develop brain tumor.

Even now that the main scammers have removed CBN from the equation, hopeless donors (aka beneficiaries) will still continue to believe the new lies. Fact!

Melancholy:
Good question! You see as young as l am, know a lot about grant and the reason is not far- fetched cos l am an undergraduate studying course related to it. Telpecon is a form networking to allow for NGOs not to resort to duplication and strengthen their proposal having a lot of database to proof to it donor. Having said this, they've been to surmount any spirit of power greediness, and aside that, a network of NGOs must have a leader, so donor entrusting this grant in his hands shouldn't be a problem, sir.

Just read the quote above.

So, argue with this benighted one at your own peril

Some have thrown there small sense into Sambisa Forrest. I am not here for those. But for the ones who are willing to keep an open mind. Those who want to cure their ignorance.

I have always said it that there are more fools in Nigeria than there are people.

I have also been saying it that this scam will last for 2-5 years unless government intervenes speedily.

No free $700 million or $800 billion exist anywhere to be shared by some contemptible bastards to Nigerians. Fact!

It's glaring to even destitutes of common sense that financial literacy is low in Nigeria. And it shows in our NSE.

Melancholy:
A good mathematician would know that 700m dollars after conversion to naira definitely go round even though may not be up to 5 or 10million any longer.

Always resist the urge to shalaye!!!! Lol

Look at this runt.

No wonder you are still a hopeless victim in this TELPECON madness. No wonder the scam is still going strong.

No wonder a former CBN labelled many of you as unemployable.

Give this small calculation to your primary 4 brother/sister/relative to help you out.

At the official exchange rate of 380, each (and I am using the more reasonable total of 10 million beneficiaries) of you will get less than 30k, assuming the money ($700 million) is shared equally.

To think that you are a student of adult education in a Nigerian university and you are this clueless in simple mathematics! Any adult looking up to people like you for educational redemption is lost cos you are hopeless and ineducable yourself.

Trust me, I dont bandy words with unintelligent characters.

Major takeways from the meeting of nonpariel scammer-in-chief Elomama with other spivs and my responses:

"Telpecon is finally in custody of the Grant Claim/Grant Document." The fake TELEX copy? After spending the last 2-3 months looking for that TELEX copy, I think donors (aka beneficiaries) should ensure it is deposited in the safest CBN vault before TELPECON leader cook up another story around it. ;DDD It won't be possible sha cos the TELEX copy and other documents are non-existent.

"The figure written in the Grant Document is $700m." Oh! It's no longer $700 billion. The size of the lie has been reduced to make it believable, abi. Hope the size of the money doesn't shrink further


"Disbursement office will be furnished and prepared Immediately." Disbursement office? What's wrong with using TELPECON OFFICE of old? Is that one fake too? After all, people arent going to queue up to collect this money? Do you need a separate office to effect Bank transfers, again? Or they want to build their own gigantic bank office? Oh! I get it. Donors(aka beneficiaries) be ready to donate more.


"The Donors will be invited to the country to inspect the whole environment before the Money is transfered." Oh boy! Money wey be don dey the country since last year? Who remember that time wey Elomama bein just dey wait for alert from CBN? These imaginary donors will come and inspect what environment? Thought they came earlier this year. Remember they will only come when everything is ready and this will take a whole year with TELPECON ;DD Which serious donor would still want to donate after seeing the infightings, lack of structure and organisational procedures, and endless lies etc in all these? So u believe some bozos somewhere are willing to part with $700million just like that?

"The money will be transferred directly into Telpecon Account and Disbursement begins Immediately." I like the new strategy here: let's remove CBN cos it was making us look like fools. Una see how the story dey change for una very eyes?

Matters arising

1) How will 10 million (forget 44 million beneficiaries) share a paltry $700 million?

2) The foreign donors are still nameless!

3) With the small money, no hope for community project, again?

4) No disbursement timeline, just new stories to generate more lies.


My final take on the outcome of this latest gathering of schnucks

I expected them to bring out a believable storyline and they didn't disappoint. Kudos to them Now CBN is no longer your problem; it's now going to be "environment" and "disbursement office.", "foreign donors have not yet visited", etc. The line about "donors coming to inspect before transfer of grants" is the perfect way to buy more time, and more lies will come out from that line. Just wait. Is anyone noticing that they have successfully dragged disbursement date to no mans land.



Donors (aka beneficiaries) una food don done for the next couple of months. They have succeded in calming you guys down. Now it's another round of hoping for the impossible. UP TELPECON

How people are waiting for these blundering schnooks to come share what is way bigger than what the Nigerian economy is worth is beyond me.

But one word sums it up. Stupidity. On the part of people who should know(the so-called graduates and intending graduates)

berbs:
They'll soon come out with another drama now. Let's watch and see.

Sure!

peeps4u:
Money that has already been transferred to Telpecon account.

I didn't know CBN helps individuals or organisations safe money, I thought CBN only dealt with banks and govt.

I think I also will need to open an acct with CBN now

haha

"CBN to transfer money to Telpecon." Nothing idiots will not believe

Guys, make no mistake about this ongoing TELPECON/SEM madness; It will take 2-5 years for it to die out unless government comes down hard on those bastards.

Unless government does the needful, donors (aka beneficiaries) should continue to expect more and more meaningless updates.

What donors(aka beneficiaries) will start saying when they are fed-up:

1) Did I use your money?

2) I paid only a small amount/ I didn't pay at all

3) Life goes on. You win some and lose some.

5) Life is all about risks. I took a risk. (expect this statement from top risk managers)

6) It was the infighting amongst top leaders that prevented disbursement. (The eternal fools will said this)

7) I didn't put all my mind into it, so I am not pained by the failure to disburse.

CBN has "eaten" the money. (expect this statement from some eternal fools)

9) The foreign donors have withdrawn the grant. (expect this from moronic graduates)

10) The money will still come. (expect this from the hopeless)

11) Look, I have cars, a house, and my family is doing well. The failure of the grant does not affect me. (expect this from people with average money and liars too)

12) Our TELPECON leaders didn't follow the right path to assess the grant, hence it failed. (expect this from those who think they know)

Donors(aka beneficiaries), it's going pear-shaped, isn't it?