₦airaland Forum

Nnemuka:
you are too proud, ego is your major problem which you need to work on.
see how you painted your wife , you just want us to see the demon in her and perfect husband in you.
for 10months your inlaws didn't call and you didn't bother calling nor visiting to know how she's fairing.
That woman should just leave you and focus on being better because being with you will never be productive.

gulfer:
Does she have a father, and where are they from

J4JUVENTUS:
She never loved you ,if your story is true ...

And I wonder why you will still choose to stay with woman who doesn't love you for real..

If,I will advice you my brother..I will tell you to let her marry her mum,because to me she doesn't care about your home/marriage....

theButterfly:
It's irresponsible for a grown woman of 40-years to leave her husband's home for her mother's for 10-months now and counting, not caring about your wellbeing or how you're faring. I suppose she took the child with her. You didn't admit any abuse or irresponsible behaviour on your part to have warranted such a move. The reasons you mentioned aren't enough for her to leave her matrimonial home, that is, if what you've written is the complete truth. She obviously doesn't want to be married to you anymore or has someone else she's not telling your about.

stinflame:
When you used the word faithful wife I just laughed. Believe you me, cheating is not merely about committing adultery. It begins when one starts giving attention to another individual, who isn't their spouse. Believe you me, a woman normally acts up when they start giving attention to another and that person is doing some , for now truth be told u no longer the sugar In her tea, some one practically is, you no longer the one she yawn to talk to, make her hormones jump for joy. But believe you me some one definitely is. Your wife might not be cheating on u but trust me some one is taking her attention. All this can be seen in even an ordinary girlfriend who find another guy appealing than her guy. Little wrong from you will offend her, she won't want to give u a listening ear, cause she knows not talking to u wont swing her mood provided her admirer is there. My take is, stop begging for her attention, pretend like nothing bothers u. This in later run strike a chord in her, and most importantly make sure u making progress, go out and hussle and make ur mind occupy. She will be back and her admiring and u been her super hero will start all over again.
And most importantly sniff around, to find facts,and confront her with them amicable people become powerless when u know their secret.

dirtydiva:
Who are my to judge when I hv not heard from both mouth and you nid to leave your wife as she is in safe hands and focus on how to start up again and once you start all over learn to control your house and I hope what you stated here are exactly what happened

flexxyworld:
Well done sir.. I feel your plight but truth is your problem didn't start when you lost your job, it's been there but you were covered either by love and she was seduced by the funds you were making available but your inability too meet all her demands exposed it all.. fast forward too the issue at hand, it's a pity you might not win the war, I'm sure she's from a broken home or a home where the mother happens too be almighty. kindly be prayerful. may we never marry our enemy or a woman sent out too disorganise our life's. . she's was never your wife but it's too late, just take it easy. I pray God help you over come, the real fight isn't your wife anyways, it's her mother.. just my humble summation.

Poorboy:
Don't be too emotionally attached to women if you do so suicide awaits you..... If you love with your whole heart then a big problem awaits you. ....


You said you're jobless and you feel a woman will love you, wake up brother and do something about your life.

Note as a man even if you marry a lady that loves you and Money stops coming the love she has for you will die naturally.

Not that you must be rich, but you must be working and be able to pay some bills.

Even in my house as a man the time my parents started respecting me is when I got a Federal Government job, I saw a different behavior from them...

Kendumazy:
Will you take my advice? Shit happens in this life. Not until, when you started seeing everything as risk which end result you can't predict, you will live life better. Forget about all the emotional abuse etc. As a man you have every right to verbally abuse her in as much as she is the one that triggers it and she seems never ready to stop. You can as well verbal abuse her. Na blood dey run in your vein too. The strength to keep been silent over verbal abuse from a second party is a gift. Not everyone is gifted in such area. The ability to settle every abuses in a relationship is what keep most marriages till date most especially the ones both parties contributed to the abuse. Your wife triggers your anger which made you reacted but she is not ready to look at things in that way that she is also the cause.
Bro, life isn't hard! In as much as her mum is alive, there's little or nothing you can do. She will continue to control her daughter. Do you know why the woman keeps doing that shit as well? Because, you too, you give her the chance.
See, ignore them. Work on your life. The little you have, Send your kid upkeep to her via bank account for record purposes. Don't dwell much on the nonsense they are doing. You have tried enough. Go out there and make yourself happy. Trust me, when they see that, you don't send them again. Your wife will gradually come back to her senses and probably start fighting for her freedom from her mother. In short, stop being a sissy!

Kendumazy:
Will you take my advice? Shit happens in this life. Not until, when you started seeing everything as risk which end result you can't predict, you will live life better. Forget about all the emotional abuse etc. As a man you have every right to verbally abuse her in as much as she is the one that triggers it and she seems never ready to stop. You can as well verbal abuse her. Na blood dey run in your vein too. The strength to keep been silent over verbal abuse from a second party is a gift. Not everyone is gifted in such area. The ability to settle every abuses in a relationship is what keep most marriages till date most especially the ones both parties contributed to the abuse. Your wife triggers your anger which made you reacted but she is not ready to look at things in that way that she is also the cause.
Bro, life isn't hard! In as much as her mum is alive, there's little or nothing you can do. She will continue to control her daughter. Do you know why the woman keeps doing that shit as well? Because, you too, you give her the chance.
See, ignore them. Work on your life. The little you have, Send your kid upkeep to her via bank account for record purposes. Don't dwell much on the nonsense they are doing. You have tried enough. Go out there and make yourself happy. Trust me, when they see that, you don't send them again. Your wife will gradually come back to her senses and probably start fighting for her freedom from her mother. In short, stop being a sissy!

Martinez39:
Do you have children?

CaptainMitch:
I dont support verbal or emotional abuse, give her time to heal, marriage should be based on love not forced. Try to improve your income we all know money brings respect

elmagnifico411:
Problem number 1; you don’t drink, you don’t smoke, you don’t womanise, I hope you watch football, cos if u dont eeehn, na wahala u dey so oh. See ehn, for we brotherhood of the bar, we don’t entaitain this kindaissues. If I were I , I wouldn’t go looking for her again. This is time to test your skills( have your female friends come check u at home. Not that you want to do anything oh, but for reports to get to her that it seems another woman wants to take her place. She will leave her yeye mother), borrowing that phrase ‘if your story is true’.

You got no vice. Now she seems to be like the only thing u got, every now and then you seem lost and empty. Bros, get out there and start looking for a good woman who would love u for u. You don’t even know if she was the one that brought bad luck to u. Abeg celebrate her departure.

A friend of mine got married while he was jobless. Thank God he got a good family. They all rally round him and helped him out, though the wife had a job.. a month into their marriage, dangote fkndtirctions offered him a nice job and oga is doing well now. Thata the kinda luck a good woman come with. Everyone has foregotten that when he wanted to get married baba no get job. Bros, that woman isn’t for you. Go get a new woman who’s gonna be a source of open doors to u. Ire o

Martinez39:
@tunagee

Do bother about finding the right woman, THEY ARE ALL LIKE THAT. SOME DON'T HIDE IT WHILE SOME ARE PRETENDERS.

CaptainMitch:
I dont support verbal or emotional abuse, give her time to heal, marriage should be based on love not forced. Try to improve your income we all know money brings respect

Kendumazy:
Is she working?

Kendumazy:
Don't you see her mother domineering attitude over her while you were courting? Your wife isn't the problem. It's her mother. That's why it's very very important to look at the family you want to marry into.

OladimejiRufai:
Well, nobody knows the future.


But personally, whenever it is that I finally 'jam' that stage when I will have a lot of money, my interest in women will diminish greatly.


As the door to riches open, the door to my heart will close. Because any woman who shows love or approach to me then, I may not be sure what she is actually showing love to; me or the money? Especially when the lady knew me before I made money and used to act like I do not exist.


And I will hate it upon realizing that the woman I married, married me because of my money. In fact, I may send her out No place for such a despicable human being in my home.


Anyways, OP, if your story is true, you are welcome to the club cause you are not the first man women will show such attitude. If ur story is true, it is obvious she came for the money and now that the money is leaving, she is leaving. Believe me, such a woman is not worth a companion.


Well, people have different perceptions of divorce so I do not know abour you but what I want u to know is what I have said; if your story is true, such a woman should not be allowed in one's life as a man for the sake of progress, peace of mind and sanity. That woman is not worth taking as a wife. So it is left to you

Fountainofyouth:
Honestly this is sad, from all your write up, the problem started when you lost your job, meaning all was fine before then, meaning you enticed her with money when you both started dating, meaning there was never real love in the first place just love for material and financial gain, well,since she is still interested in the marriage, give her more time that she needs, do your part by calling and seeing her not just sending your mum to go there, make steps too towards getting her back cos it's obvious you both still want to be together, all the best.

P.S To all those guys that says "make money first then women will flow your way" this is the end result.

OsuEbonyi:
Nah so e easy

SmellingAnus:
Even some married women will leave their husbands

lilwetdick:
nigerian marriages is just filled with troubles, from fry pan to fire, if it is not inlaws problems, it will be wife problems or husband problems, can parents just chill and allow couples be

AutoJoshNG:
These days, one cannot commute on roads in Lagos state without beholding some bizarre sights.

It is the sight of wet clothes hung up to dry along important roads in the state.

Are these not clear signs of the huge crisis of homelessness in Nigeria's commercial capital?

Lagos State, though not officially recognized as the most populous state in Nigeria, is home to over 20 million Nigerians.



https://autojosh.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Homeless-In-Lagos-1.jpg
https://autojosh.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Homeless-In-Lagos-3.jpg
https://autojosh.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Homeless-In-Lagos-4.jpg
https://autojosh.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Homeless-In-Lagos-6.jpg
https://autojosh.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/06/Clothes-on-road-4-1.jpg
https://autojosh.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Homeless-In-Lagos-15.jpg
https://autojosh.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Homeless-In-Lagos-5.jpg
https://autojosh.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Homeless-In-Lagos-8.jpg
https://autojosh.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Homeless-In-Lagos-12.jpg
https://autojosh.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Homeless-In-Lagos-13.jpg
https://autojosh.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Homeless-In-Lagos-14.jpg
https://autojosh.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Homeless-In-Lagos-10.jpg

Source:

https://autojosh.com/are-these-not-signs-of-homelessness-in-lagos-state-photos/

Lalasticlala
Mynd44
Ishilove
Marpol
Semid4lyfe
Obinoscopy
Seun

Wettoid123:
All women are the same bro,don't even think of divorce do u know if the one you will marry after divorce will be the worst.

Wettoid123:
All women are the same bro,don't even think of divorce do u know if the one you will marry after divorce will be the worst.

camoncx2019:
When the bus is in motion - on the bus

When the bus is not in motion - in the bus

DrTee1:
Hey! Folks blaming the Judge do not understand what happens in Courts.

The Court is a place for legal matters - not emotions - and everything is done in the open, and can get into the media.

A Judge can refuse to dissolve a marriage even if the couples, both members of the marriage, agree to a divorce.

You've got to prove irreconcilable differences in court.

So for celebrities who are married by the Marriage Act, and whose breakup and divorce matters would get to the Courts (and social media!), where information revealed there is like being in the open market square and washing dirty linen, it is not like social media trials at all.

The couple who want separation have to really to convince a Judge that the differences are indeed irreconcilable, it can be very difficult to be honest and plain and not want to tarnish the image of the other party but leaving the real sleaze out - and still get a divorce when there is no hatred between the couple who simply want a legal separation.

The Judge would tell the couple and their lawyers that S/He was not there when they were loving each other and having fun to the extent of marriage and children - and s/he isn't convinced that the separation is irreconcilable. Oya, alele, go back home to continue your love and don't put your divorce on my head/name.

It is like Pilate washing his hands off the crucifixion of Jesus. It is difficult for people who don't work around the courts or visit it regularly to understand these things. To put it clearly, if two people in marriage do not exemplify extremely negative emotions towards each other, it is almost impossible to get a divorce before a Judge. For every friendliness the court sees, it would be willing to explore it and restore the marriage.

Judges are more interested in reconciliation of marriages than divorce. Marriage isn't for kids or people who cannot deal with extreme issues and keep the evidence if you ever want to get a divorce. Now, that is very difficult, because only a very wicked person can stay in a marriage and be keeping evidence of abuse against his/her wife/husband - so you see, except where there are clearly established cases of infidelity or threat to life or something - it is very difficult to honestly prove a case for divorce in court.

So yes, the next time you read something about proceeding from divorce cases, please know that in most cases, the issues are exaggerated so as to make the Judge get convinced.


N.B: Note that I didn't say 'all cases'

victorian:
Oh ok

And people who did traditional marriage only.

No need for court decision on that as well?

HopeAlive14:
It beats my imagination why two people who started off loving themselves for years suddenly become enemies after marriage.

Let them go and work on their marriage; they will succeed.