Help!!! 

I don’t really know what’s wrong with my relationship, I need your assistance.

To brief what is actually going on, my girl showed me true love until I trusted her 100% and then I realise she sometimes lie to me. I found out that she was keeping another guy outside there that she doesn’t want me to know.

I begun to sense it because I see him come see her some days, but I was just suspecting that they have something running! So, I decided to clear my doubts and ask her if she is actually keeping another man outside. She said no, he's just a friend! -- I accepted it like that!

With time, I saw his text in her phone, he wrote “my love” in the text  . I asked her why he has to write all this crazy text messages to her. He is in love with her but she rejects him was her reply. 

So, I said she better do that because I don’t like games (because she's the one I wish to Marry Her).

After some weeks, I couldn’t satisfy my curiosity so I was checking her phone again.

I saw a text she sent him, she was writing please come to my house I want to see you, I need you. -- I showed her the text and asked why? She was idle and silent! – After a while  she said, it was because he's been asking her out for long while she rejects and she's afraid he could be so bad to attend to "Babalawo!" thats why she's showing him like she love him, but she doest it.

She was shedding tears  , tell me that its me she wants. She doesn’t keep any one else!

I then said why? "Why my love?" was my statement,  I then said it's OK, if she doest want him she shouldn’t play him. I asked if she wants something from him, she said no,  So, we talked and talked,  I give up it because I had no option.

Since then, she kept me confused by making things so complicated for me to understand. But I had to escape that from my mind because I really love her!

Just two days after that, a neighbour of mine told me he saw my girl at a party inside someone's car kissing! (I don’t know whether its the same guy) My neighbour had some witnesses, so I can’t deny it. Besides, he's someone I trust and believe will not tell me lies,    -- That night, the earth could not carry me!

(To cut things short)*

So, I approached her and with few little conversations that shows its true. She confessed and said she just give the guy a peck and it was not the same guy, this one was her friend. I know its not just a peck because that was not what I was told, but because I love her  I had to forgive her and warn her that things like this shouldn’t happen again.

All that while, my life suddenly changes. I can't enjoy anything,  Not even my friends could keep me happy,  I can’t watch TV and be happy; I can’t spend few hours with my family to have fun!

I only want to go and see her day after day yet I feel more and more sad, because I always think and think.

Suddenly one day he called her while I was sitting with her their house, I didn’t know he was the one. So, after a while she began to pretend her stomach is aching and she needs to enter the house and take a rest. I had to pardon her even though I wanted to talk more with her,

I went home and suddenly I realised I left my keys in her house. I called her number to ask her to check my keys. Suddenly, her sister picked and said my girl wasn’t there in the house. I was shocked  because the time was after 10pm! - So I rushed to her house and WOW its true she's out! - I picked my keys and was on my way out of their house and there she was with the guy in his car behind their house!

Men this is though for me to take,  I waited till the next day before I talked to her about it. She wanted to deny it, but I told her I saw her my self and I even describe what I saw. She said yes she was with him, but she didnt stay long. Besides they aren’t talking about anything.

{Hmm,  How do you expect me to believe that?}

So, I asked her again if she loves him or not. This time around she said she online like him and that’s all.  Its me she loves! (can you believe that)

(HOT in me!) - I was sweating,  Now you like him,  IC, I demand she leave him right a way! - She said NO, she can't just send him away for nothing. I said ok, I am now nothing! She said no, its just that she can't do it.

I demand she choose me or him.

I left her for 5days; no call no text no visit. - She did the same thing, she ignored me to.

I had to go and see her after, I asked why she didn’t even respond to me. She said she wanted to see if I really love her, she knows I will comeback. I was OH that’s it, ok do as you wish. But I love you, nothing can change that. 

Today, I am from her house and she doesn’t want me to talk about our early happy times. She said she feels bad, and she needs to go in. I was like WOW, you don’t want to remember our good times? She said she just want to enter inside.

I said I am not going no where,  I will stay.

I couldn’t believe it,  She then walked away from me.

I called her sister and complained; we talked and talked with her sister. I then have to go home; suddenly I saw the guy’s car packed outside. My girl was with him! -- I waited until they are over, that was around past 11pm.

I called her and said thank you for showing me you are really with him,  Now I see he has more value than I do, she said it’s not like that,  I then asked what ist? She said I don’t know! 

I then said, may GOD punish you and I will never forgive you,  I walked home.

Please I need assistance and suggestions, should I quit this relationship or not? I really love her. Please help!

love they say is blind. marraige is an eye opener.

bro, what more evidence do you need?  sometimes i fear for the next generation of men we are raising up in Nigeria.

our girls never used to be able to get away with murder like these. what is happening?

true love is like a flower nurture it and you see it blosoom. it is so sad to see game players playing with peoples minds and lives in the name of love. yet i hear some women say all men are liars.

move on with your life young man and open your eyes. there would be some beautiful lady out there that deserves your love. dont waste it just yet

@poster

I don't think it is called "LOVE". She cheats on you; not into you; not serious committed with you; and she is player!!! It is sick that she has multiple male partners more than one.

It sound like she is a prostitute to me!!! She do not know the meaning of "relationship", "committment" and "marriage". Because she keep saying "i don't know" when u ask her if she loves you seriously or not!!!!

It is up to you to remain love her and marry her but as of result you will end up unhappy marriage because she will do continue non-stop seeing different men once she is your wife.

Are you sure that she is the RIGHT ONE for your futre wife? Check out the following link at below:

10 Insights You should take steps into serious relationship before you get marry her/him
https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-95533.0.html

@ poster , from the bit i read u mentioned she cheated , so she isnt into u , GET OVER IT !!! and move on

Thanks,   

The thing is that I am addicted to her, I love her with all my heart. I never loved someone before, I give her total submission and trust! I always endup going to see her everyday! - Now its hard for me to just leave her one time.

Like I've said, I took 5days with no calls, no visits, no even text messages. Those days where tough for me, I spend the whole day thinking of her. I can't even eat and enjoy my meal, everythings seams misserable to me. I only sit down and cry out my tears of pain!

Tears I've shed could fill a bucket,   -- She rule my life, I dont know what to do!

Just now I called her, she rejected my calls over and over before she pickedup finally and said "I thought you said you will never forgive me!". I was poissoned to say I am sorry while she was to say that to me. Yet she said she wants to talk with a friend and sleep, we shall talk tomorrow!

Now I don't know what to do,  I just have to wait tomorow,  I only told her over the phone, she should forget I said those words and I don't care whether she's keeping him or not "I LOVE YOU" was my statement,  I can't believe its me like this. I am blind!

Over the phone, she even wanted to quit the relationship as I heard her say its over.  But I just said I am sorry, things will be good.

Rufai sharrap there! There are way too many women out there to let one inconsequential chick rule ur life. Move on pls.
Its clear she's taken you for granted to the extent that she no longer bothers to hide her affair from you.

Even if u beg her from now till tomorrow, she has no iota of respect for u anymore and if there is one man a woman will NEVER marry, it is a man she does not respect.

bro better believe it is over and move on with your life. it is sad but face the truth. your life is better without people like this heartless girl.

you will get over it.

awww, true love still exist

rufaair you have to man up and stop being played like a football!

is she the only girl in Sokoto or her nunu is better than the rest? Just learn from it and move on asap!
you should get out there and show her you can do better!!!

Flirty
Disrespectful
Heartless
Inconsiderate
Immature

If these are the qualities you want in a wife, she's the one for you.

But this is my honest opinion, she doesn't love you. Please don't wait till she disgraces you in public, leave her alone and move on. Do not make the mistake of calling her again, because she might say words that might break you into two.


_{So Nigerian guys can fall in love}

So Nigerian guys can fall in love

he is 16 18, he will fall in line very soon

Sorry ehn!

Thanks,

I said I will see her this morning, so you guys are keeping me off (its already time). I dont feel good about it -- I know she loves me, its reached family case you know. Her sister told me to be patient and give her time! - I am in the dark,

If I need solution, I want to know how to keep her and change her to be good.
give me a solution on how to make her leave him and be with me.

I cant afford loosing this girl, I never loved before and now I am madly in it, I wish I never loved.

Love is painful.

sorry dude, but you cannot change someone. you can only change yourself. no matter what you do or say or threaten/promise you cannot force her to change that is something she has to want to do, but it does not sound like she will. y can't u afford loosing dis gurl? jus cuz u neva love b4 n u wen fall hard dis time no mean that u cannot heal wit time and move on. besides u get time what is the rush to fall in love n get married anyways?

uhm!!! Nice story line, but are you that ugly and unfortunate? i think its only an ugly and nothing to give guy would just sit back in this kind of a relationship!, SHE ALREADY SHOW YOU THE PICTURE THAT SHE DOESN'T WANT YOU ANYONE. yet you are still TOO BLIND to see the picture! wake up small boy and shine your eyes. right now, go and get EVA soap, wash yourself with a very warm water, don't rub any cream!, go to bed and take like 5 hours nap, then when you wake up, iron your best shirt and trouser, polish the best shoe you have (ITS WEEKEND DUDE), hang around anywhere you think you can have fun from, make sure you go with your friends, don't even the your mind the chance to think about her. ignore her existence. admirer some sweet sexy daughters of Eve.( but make sure you don't get caught by SHARIA persecutors). man you have got along life to live, you are still fucking young bro, what the hell is wrong with you little chicken brain? you think you are the first person to be in love and to have passed through this kind of scenerio? you better wake up from that silly slumber and face reality. the same fucking way you found this stupid and unrealistic girl, thats the same way you will find a new one who would show you what REAL love is.
so wake up now and face reality!!!

@ rufaai: pls quit the " my life is over, i can't live without her" lamentations! haba, ur a man. its one thing to love and its another thing for the love to be reciprocated, in ur case she clearly does not appreciate the fact u can walk thru fire for her. move on and save ur love and devotion for smeone who will also give the world for u. cheers.

@ posta

why don't u give her a second chance.
we all make mistakes some times, if u really love this dump girl of a thing man give her a second chance to prove she really worth ur love.

@christiana; second chances are for those who truly understand what it means!

Thanks chistiana, - thats what I would like to hear

So, I like I said I will see her.

Well, I have and she was just silent to me. I run the conversation, so I talked to her about our early times. How we use to be happy, make fun and laugh. The way she doesn't want me to go when I visit her, she use to tell me she love's seen me!

I reminded her of all the Glo Voice Messages she demanded I send her just because she want to hear my voice,

I talked of times she want me to carry her behind my back, lift her up and all the run plays and dances we had. - She was silent though. But I continued to remind her how she stay up late just to talk with me over the night when I will tell her she needs to sleep because she needs to attend school the next day but she refuses saying she need to talk with me the whole night.

After that,

I said to her "just look at us now, both sad! No more fun" all because of a guy who popped just to ruin our well being. I told her how sad it was for me to sit down and just begin crying of pain. (Still silent she was!)

I asked her if she wants life as it is now or the way we use to be earlier, I asked twice before she said, she wants us happy!

I then said OK, then do something to make it because I am already low. I can't make any effect,

She then said we should go out to the shade and sit, she brought out a mat and we sat. She then gave me a mint, I collected and took it though I wanted not to.

She said, do I feel like eating? I said no, then she said I C. You must have eaten I guess, Suddenly she begun to be normal and said she doesn't want us to talk about been sad again and said things will OK!

I have no option that to say thank you. I then said I will see her tonight, She said she really love me, she even gave me a hug. I was a bit OK then

What do you guys think? Can someone write full perception please,

I will see her later - Hoping to see changes,

:-x

do men like this still exist?
a girl is fucking two timing under your very nose and ure whining you love her,which kind love be that, guy wake up from your misery, ure pathetic.and she realizes that.

Poster

sorry i couldnt read none of ur sh*!

too damn long. . . u'll be a good poet!

rufaai:

Thanks chistiana, - thats what I would like to hear

So, I like I said I will see her.

Well, I have and she was just silent to me. I run the conversation, so I talked to her about our early times. How we use to be happy, make fun and laugh. The way she doesn't want me to go when I visit her, she use to tell me she love's seen me!

I reminded her of all the Glo Voice Messages she demanded I send her just because she want to hear my voice,

I talked of times she want me to carry her behind my back, lift her up and all the run plays and dances we had. - She was silent though. But I continued to remind her how she stay up late just to talk with me over the night when I will tell her she needs to sleep because she needs to attend school the next day but she refuses saying she need to talk with me the whole night.

After that,

I said to her "just look at us now, both sad! No more fun" all because of a guy who popped just to ruin our well being. I told her how sad it was for me to sit down and just begin crying of pain. (Still silent she was!)

I asked her if she wants life as it is now or the way we use to be earlier, I asked twice before she said, she wants us happy!

I then said OK, then do something to make it because I am already low. I can't make any effect,

She then said we should go out to the shade and sit, she brought out a mat and we sat. She then gave me a mint, I collected and took it though I wanted not to.

She said, do I feel like eating? I said no, then she said I C. You must have eaten I guess, Suddenly she begun to be normal and said she doesn't want us to talk about been sad again and said things will OK!

I have no option that to say thank you. I then said I will see her tonight, She said she really love me, she even gave me a hug. I was a bit OK then

What do you guys think? Can someone write full perception please,

I will see her later - Hoping to see changes,

 Hogwash hogwash hogwash, you are not ready to leave your misery

@ rufaai,
Aja to ba so nu, ko ni gbo fere olode. Meaning: A dog that wants to stray off, will never hearken to the whistle and voice of its owner.

I have been in your exact shoes, with the lady acting as your girlfriend is doing. Did I learn my lesson from it, oh yes I did and very painfully too. I will honestly tell you to quit that relationship!

blackgucci:

do men like this still exist?

Yes some men like this do still exist----sick lovestruck both USA, UK, and even everywhere in the world.

I had experienced with my male best friend who lovestruck to married woman in the USA even he is single for 4 years relationship---I tried console his pain complaining about her. That married woman still has a husband and 4 children she won't leave her own house, at the same time her husband has girlfriend from college. Her husband works as college professor. She works as government postal worker. That married woman is just exactly like here posted heartless infidelity girl. (20 years marriage something like that)

I gave up letting my male best friend 2 years ago. He is hard-headed refused to let her go until he changed his church seeking for private counseling that hit him hard not know about sinful dating to married woman consider adultery! That is what I tried telling him so many times. Now he has hard time forgetting about her, move on dating another unmarried woman with 5 children for similiar past relationship!

I never understand my male best friend at all---i glad let him go!!!!

@ poster,
long story. . . . .
if you cant read the writing on the wall,then i cant help you

guys like you make the women folk think they can take men for granted. what more proof do you need to se before you know you are history to her? _{abi o ti s'efo fun e ni?}

do they still do izal back home? this young man needs his brain cleaned and disinfected.
God help you

FREE!!!! that's what i'll tell u to do.
if u want to get back at her play along and hit her where it hurts.

@ poster. I understand every bit of your feelings and pains because I was once in it. Lets face it, this girl doesnt worth spending a year with let alone a life time. Girls like that are in town now and we guys cant just help it. Beleive me, the girl is leaving u not for the guy but for the guy's car perhaps u dont have one.
Man mi, pls move on with life, think big, aim high and project your objectives you will surely get to the top and find a better girl that knows your worth.

Guys, She's acting normal now. Its Like she wants me now!

This morning, I was with her. She said she could't take any brakefast because she doesnt have the appatite for tea! So, I rushed to the nearby Oasis Bakery and grab for her some Pizza and Drinks.

We took it together in their house and she was pretty fine and funny as she lost a 50 Naira note and she was dancing the whole house for her note. We were laughing with her Sisters . - The family is quite OK!

What do you think guys, she doesnt want me to talk about this guy or act sad. She just want me to be good!

Should I go ahead to quitting or should I wait and see what turns out? Another thing, I dont know how to quit a relationship. Someone tell what to do incase I have to.

DONT RUN. GO MAKE HER PREGNANT AND ENJOY THE MISERABLE LIFE YOU ARE HEADING TOWARDS. YOU STILL HAVE NOT ANSWERED MY QUESTION. HOW DID YOU GET YOUR BRAIN AND YOUR EMOTIONS TWISTED LIKE THIS? HOW OLD ARE YOU?

@ xgbovo

Exactly what I thought too, this guy has a car I don't have one  . My DAD wunt let me have one though my MOM seeked for me, but he said NO!

This guy is her TAXI, he takes her everywhere she needs to go to on Occassions and also picks her up. I can only pay for a bike for her!
but why?

@joshjosh

Miserable life! How could you talk like that, I dont do that. Your question! How I get to love her that much? Because she proved to me she loves me earlier, she would sit and cry and if I ask why she'll say she just doesnt want to loose me. She loves me! Even her sister said sometimes she does that, she's too hearty.

I begun to love her more and more, to a family extent. I dont have any relationship with any girl except her, if I need someone to just talk and have fun its just her. No one else, no one.

Wanna know my age? well, I am 18! that was just the last November I got to that.