coogar:

then those women should not have children. they would be deluded to believe they can dedicate 100% to fulfil and dedicate 100% child care at the same time. if the career is more important, those women should get effective contraception and forget about having kids....it's so simple!



in the early stages, the woman spends more time with infants than the husband unless you know a breast-feeding husbands!



is my accusation misplaced? sisikill did not even deny it!



i have found more than 300 articles on this ish but they are too geeky for you to understand. the amount of time both parents spend on their kids is even more than the 6 hrs/day i mentioned in their infantry. i am collating the ammo to silence you!



her qualifications and her wealth of experience are priceless than the wet behind ears vibrant people you're referring to! age is overrated!

For the job scenario, I 100% sure you are not referring to a Nigerian setting. So a man can have kids and still concentrate 100% on his career? Is a taboo for a man to take care of his kids once in a while? A working man/woman is entitled to on month's leave and others. Can't they rotate the care? I'm sure Ben Carson's mother didn't spend quality time as she worked 3 jobs trying to make ends meet.

Billyonaire: Taking care of kids should not be an excuse for lazy women who want to be housewives. Fathers can spend time too with kids.

Don't you know it's a taboo?

bukatyne: For the job scenario, I 100% sure you are not referring to a Nigerian setting. So a man can have kids and still concentrate 100% on his career? Is a taboo for a man to take care of his kids once in a while? A working man/woman is entitled to on month's leave and others. Can't they rotate the care? I'm sure Ben Carson's mother didn't spend quality time as she worked 3 jobs trying to make ends meet.

we are talking about parents here - mother and father.
who is more likely to be given a longer leave - which is longer? paternity leave or maternity leave? the woman gets to stay at home more - of course, when the fathers come back from work 2-4 hrs bonding with the kids is necessary. who the heck is ben carson and is ben carson's mum a nigerian housewife?

As long as there as cogent reasons for it, there is nothing wrong in being a house wife. I, for one would like my wife to go into ministry or float an NGO. She has to do something with her life, even if I'm a billionaire.

dayokanu: ^^ I dont think Homeschooling is best for any kid.

One they miss out of the very necesary social skills they need to develop and are unduly sheltered from the world they would still go to later (Unprepared though)

How much can a mother know unless she is a trained teacher herself.

How many housewives can teach children Algebra, Arithmetic, Calculus, CHemistry abi how dem go do that one

You possibly think all housewives are dumb like your village babe abi.
LMAO

Naija mentality in full play mode

bukatyne: Don't you know it's a taboo?

Nigeria has no social security scheme, no pension plan, no jobs needless to say retirement benefits, no foodstamps, no credit cards, no consumer loans, and other social benefits, yet some men by grasp of sweetness of pu.ssy and vain desire to keep a beautiful woman on their beds based on biased jealousy are digging their early graves. House girlfriends are a pain in the ass needless to mention housewives that will find a very hard working man not romantic, not having time for them, and by staying home and watching TV, housewives indulge in unwholesome sexcapes that busy hardworking mothers cant fathom. Congrats to all housewives but not in my homefront.

bukatyne: For the job scenario, I 100% sure you are not referring to a Nigerian setting. So a man can have kids and still concentrate 100% on his career? Is a taboo for a man to take care of his kids once in a while? A working man/woman is entitled to on month's leave and others. Can't they rotate the care? I'm sure Ben Carson's mother didn't spend quality time as she worked 3 jobs trying to make ends meet.

There are a thousand Ian Brady(s) for every Ben Carson. Using outliers distorts this discussion

coogar:

we are talking about parents here - mother and father.
who is more likely to be given a longer leave - which is longer? paternity leave or maternity leave? the woman gets to stay at home more - of course, when the fathers come back from work 2-4 hrs bonding with the kids is necessary. who the heck is ben carson and is ben carson's mum a nigerian housewife?

Read on him. So you think 2 - 4hrs is ok for bonding with the dad but the mother needs forever to bond. A man is the head of the family yet the mother is the one that trains the kids. Talk of responsibility without authority.

naijababe:

There are a thousand Ian Brady(s) for every Ben Carson. Using outliers distorts this discussion

As some posters pointed out, the quantity of time doesn't matter, the quality does. I am not saying all kids in such shoes would be Ben Carsons; but how a kid turns out is decided by many factors.

bukatyne: Read on him. So you think 2 - 4hrs is ok for bonding with the dad but the mother needs forever to bond. A man is the head of the family yet the mother is the one that trains the kids. Talk of responsibility without authority.

who doesn't know ben carson? if anything, you are shooting yourself in the foot by throwing a rule to the exception and ignoring the fact that ben carson was a complete dullard throughout his elementary school. he was picked on and bullied by his mates everyday and the only reason this happened was because his mum was rarely at home to nurture him well. if this is the type of upbringing you have in store for your son, please get the IUD string! i can send ben carson's autobiography(Gifted Hands) to you if you want to learn more about him!

bukatyne: As some posters pointed out, the quantity of time doesn't matter, the quality does. I am not saying all kids in such shoes would be Ben Carsons; but how a kid turns out is decided by many factors.

actually, when it comes to raising the kids - it should not be about quantity vs quality but quantity plus quality. the workaholic parents started using the quality time rubbish to excuse their absence from home. if we both give the same quality time with our kids but i give more quantity than you do then i am surer to bond better with that kid than you would do yours - that's just logic!

coogar:
why can't she? why did she conceive the child if she cannot dedicate her whole life into raising them. yet you blame the breakdown in the society when you see kids misbehaving - can you not see your hypocrisy? when people become parents, the responsibility is a full time one not half-baked so forget the idea of chasing a career while abandoning your kids - it's selfish!

So the father is not supposed to spend this very 'quality time' with his children? Why are they bearing his name if the responsibility of raising them is solely on the mother's shoulders?
And, a woman can have a career and still raise children properly. That your earlier statement that 'the more quality time spent with a kid, the better for them' does not hold water. There are children that had working parents that turned out okay, untill you bring a statistical finding that proves that children who had full time housewives as mothers grow up to be better than children with working mothers, don't claim that more quality time translates to better children.

coogar:

who doesn't know ben carson? if anything, you are shooting yourself in the foot by throwing a rule to the exception and ignoring the fact that ben carson was a complete dullard throughout his elementary school. he was picked on and bullied by his mates everyday and the only reason this happened was because his mum was rarely at home to nurture him well. if this is the type of upbringing you have in store for your son, please get the IUD string! i can send ben carson's autobiography(Gifted Hands) to you if you want to learn more about him!

Who the f.u..c.k is Ben Carson, sounds like American name.....oh ..I forgot, the westerners are Africans role model. House wife in Nigeria and people are making outlandish illustrations. Americans can have 10 housewives without issues, so much of social benefits.

coogar:

who doesn't know ben carson? if anything, you are shooting yourself in the foot by throwing a rule to the exception and ignoring the fact that ben carson was a complete dullard throughout his elementary school. he was picked on and bullied by his mates everyday and the only reason this happened was because his mum was rarely at home to nurture him well. if this is the type of upbringing you have in store for your son, please get the IUD string! i can send ben carson's autobiography(Gifted Hands) to you if you want to learn more about him!



actually, when it comes to raising the kids - it should not be about quantity vs quality but quantity plus quality. the workaholic parents started using the quality time rubbish to excuse their absence from home. if we both give the same quality time with our kids but i give more quantity than you do then i am surer to bond better with that kid than you would do yours - that's just logic!

So he picked up cos his mother stopped working abi? Do the kids of housewives always fare better than working mothers in their studies? Coogar, each man to his own. I know that God did not create me just to be someone's mother; I have a destiny ot fulfil and I sure will. I don't just want to be called Iya Doctor, Iya lawyer; I want my mother to be called same too.

fellis:

So the father is not supposed to spend this very 'quality time' with his children? Why are they bearing his name if the responsibility of raising them is solely on the mother's shoulders?
And, a woman can have a career and still raise children properly. That your earlier statement that 'the more quality time spent with a kid, the better for them' does not hold water. There are children that had working parents that turned out okay, untill you bring a statistical finding that proves that children who had full time housewives as mothers grow up to be better than children with working mothers,

stop making your own argument.....
where exactly did i mention fathers have no responsibility in taking care of his own children? someone has to bring home the bacon. both parents cannot stay at home providing proper child care. the mother has to be the one to stay at home as she's the one that carried the pregnancy, she's the one that can breastfeed! while all this is happening, the man is at work providing the financial support and when he gets home - he gets to spend quality time with his kids but it cannot be as much as the mother!

bukatyne: So he picked cos his mother was at home more? The kids of housewives always fare better than working mothers in their studies? Coogar, each man to his own. I know that God did not create me just to be someone's mother; I have a destiny ot fulfil and I sure will. I don't just want to be called Iya Doctor, Iya lawyer; I want my mother to be called same too.

according to his autobiography, he started doing well because the mother was relentless even as a single mother for her children to be educated. she devised weird methods, took out the tv and replaced with books. she would ask his 2 boys to write and then grade their essays. it wasn't until in his adult life he realised her mother cannot even read but the assignments had helped ben carson rediscover himself and spiked his interests in studying!

but his case is one in a billion - it will not work 99% of the time!

dayokanu:

The bold are Gospel truth. Being a housewife is pure laziness. What would one be doing at home from 7am till 4pm washing plates for how many people? Is it a restaurant? Sweeping for 8 hours? or what

Its pure laziness for anyone to do that.

And those kind of women would now claim they should have equal stake in the marriage when they were no better than the furniture just sitting down doing nothing

The way you think sometimes amazes me because you quickly jump into conclusion without trying to use a strong valid argument to buttress home your point.

If you must know that housewives don't just wash dishes and fold their legs till 4pm......Imagine a woman that has four kids between the ages of 6,4,2 and 4months old baby which for me it's normal and we have a lot folks like that right here in Nigeria.She wakes up around 5am cook for the husband and the kids,prepare them for school while she'll be driving them to school the man goes to work ,she probably comes back from dropping the kids maybe by 9am to 9:30am due to bad traffic jam which is a daily occurrence on Nigerian roads....by the time she comes back home starts with the daily chores of cleaning up the house and you can only imagine the mess that four little kids within that age range can make in a big house,then she prepares for lunch drives off to pick the kids from school comes back home well assured that she isn't gonna sleep with those little people running around the house with no fear for danger and listens to all their complains, whining and separating the warring parties in the house because it's normal with children.

This same woman would ensure that the kids assignments are taken care of and that adds to more to her headache, if you know how many minutes it takes you to make one little kid sit down and do something boring like assignments when they have toys and friends to play with you'll understand ,then oga comes home who is just another grown baby for the woman to take of care and before you know it it's 7pm dinner comes and everybody goes to bed and she repeats this cycle everyday of her life excluding immunizations and other medical attention that will require her presence and time constantly...if you ask me, women contribute more to the family... there are somethings that money alone can't buy for you as a man to be complete.....you can call them housewives but i call them super mom

dayokanu:

The bold are Gospel truth. Being a housewife is pure laziness. What would one be doing at home from 7am till 4pm washing plates for how many people? Is it a restaurant? Sweeping for 8 hours? or what

Its pure laziness for anyone to do that.

And those kind of women would now claim they should have equal stake in the marriage when they were no better than the furniture just sitting down doing nothing

Let me start my disagreeing totally with you. Being a housewife is 1000 times more difficult than working. I know cos I've done both. The housework does not end especially if you have no help. From cooking to cleaning to changing diapers to feeding to bathing, It just doesnt end. For me working is a big relief. I can drop them in school and be free. My house is a mess but who cares? I'm making money and since money rules its fine.

Daresh:

Let me start my disagreeing totally with you. Being a housewife is 1000 times more difficult than working. I know cos I've done both. The housework does not end especially if you have no help. From cooking to cleaning to changing diapers to feeding to bathing, It just doesnt end. For me working is a big relief. I can drop them in school and be free. My house is a mess but who cares? I'm making money and since money rules its fine.

I don't know how some women cope with been an housewife. I was at home while I job hunted and believe me, I felt my life was wasting away. I would wake up, cook, clean ... to the next day without achieving anything. No impact in my world, no problem to solve etc. I believe house wifery is a gift for those who are not gifted mentally. We can't all be good in everything.

Daresh:

Let me start my disagreeing totally with you. Being a housewife is 1000 times more difficult than working. I know cos I've done both. The housework does not end especially if you have no help. From cooking to cleaning to changing diapers to feeding to bathing, It just doesnt end. For me working is a big relief. I can drop them in school and be free. My house is a mess but who cares? I'm making money and since money rules its fine.

You're on point my sister ...it's more difficult to be a housewife than the usual cranky career ladies that i've known to be working their ass off....the day she gets offended at work the whole family bears the brunt emotionally and woe betides the man if he's not well to do financially.

Being a housewife is not bein lazy and that does not mean she dont work as i hav seen a lot a self employ house wifes, bein a working wife has a finacial benefit to the family but also it comes with working hazards, most generally gender and sexual assault on ur wife, if ur family had children they will miss their moda, their upbringing is left to the tv or house maid

bukatyne: I don't know how some women cope with been an housewife. I was at home while I job hunted and believe me, I felt my life was wasting away. I would wake up, cook, clean ... to the next day without achieving anything. No impact in my world, no problem to solve etc. I believe house wifery is a gift for those who are not gifted mentally. We can't all be good in everything.

fücking hell - that's a very daft comment to make!

Metallurgist: Being a housewife is not bein lazy and that does not mean she dont work as i hav seen a lot a self employ house wifes, bein a working wife has a finacial benefit to the family but also it comes with working hazards, most generally gender and sexual assault on ur wife, if ur family had children they will miss their moda, their upbringing is left to the tv or house maid

So it's ok for the kids to miss their Father and not their mother?

bukatyne: So it's ok for the kids to miss their Father and not their mother?

it's better to miss their dads than miss both parents. both parents cannot stay at home and if one must work, then it makes more sense that the mother stay at home. if you are bring feminism into this ish then steer clear and don't derail the topic!

coogar:

fücking hell - that's a very daft comment to make!

Mr. Know all, It's not daft! Everybody can't do well in school else everyone would be first! Take it or leave it. We all have different gifts. Some people feel fulfilled been housewives; some are very frustrated.

coogar:

it's better to miss their dads than miss both parents. both parents cannot stay at home and if one must work, then it makes more sense that the mother stay at home. if you are bring feminism into this ish then steer clear and don't derail the topic!

And who told you it is better to miss the dad?

coogar:

i have found more than 300 articles on this ish but they are too geeky for you to understand. the amount of time both parents spend on their kids is even more than the 6 hrs/day i mentioned in their infantry. i am collating the ammo to silence you
!

Pls try me. In fact, the geekier the better. It's the raw, hard facts I'm looking for.

And by the way, I noticed the subtle change in your position. Now you're trying to shift it to infancy period only. No worries, even then, I still need to see the evidence you have that working mothers are more likely to raise children who are bad for society purely because they are working, during infancy or beyond!

bukatyne: I don't know how some women cope with been an housewife. I was at home while I job hunted and believe me, I felt my life was wasting away. I would wake up, cook, clean ... to the next day without achieving anything. No impact in my world, no problem to solve etc. I believe house wifery is a gift for those who are not gifted mentally. We can't all be good in everything.

If you really think that being a house wife is a gift for those who aren't mentally gifted? little wonder folks like you end up raising kids that becomes a menace to the society that roams abt in all social gathering from the age of 14 or 16 where they are easily influenced negatively because there was a vacuum in their lives that needed to be filled.

bukatyne: I don't know how some women cope with been an housewife. I was at home while I job hunted and believe me, I felt my life was wasting away. I would wake up, cook, clean ... to the next day without achieving anything. No impact in my world, no problem to solve etc. I believe house wifery is a gift for those who are not gifted mentally. We can't all be good in everything.

Ouch!!!!

bukatyne: Mr. Know all, It's not daft! Everybody can't do well in school else everyone would be first! Take it or leave it. We all have different gifts. Some people feel fulfilled been housewives; some are very frustrated.

there are plenty of learned housewives who would break every compound in you into electrons with their knowledge but decided the best way they can raise their kids is to stayathome! how can you even say something so outlandish that stayathome mums are not mentally-gifted? so everyone who works are geniuses? even when the jobs are menial? na wa for your reasoning!

So, can sb tell me how a working class lady will combine housework/home mgt and office work dat ends by 4pm

Truckpusher: If you really think that being a house wife is a gift for those who aren't mentally gifted? little wonder folks like you end up raising kids that becomes a menace to the society that roams abt in all social gathering from the age of 14 or 16 where they are easily influenced negatively because there was a vacuum in their lives that needed to be filled.

You don't know me so don't generalize please! Read my response to Coogar.

coogar:

there are plenty of learned housewives who would break every compound in you into electrons with their knowledge but decided the best way they can raise their kids is to stayathome! how can you even say something so outlandish that stayathome mums are not mentally-gifted? so everyone who works are geniuses? even when the jobs are menial? na wa for your reasoning!

Did I say all stay at home moms are not mentally gifted? Did I equally say all working moms are mentally gifted? Infact, Some working mothers should stay at home b'cos they might do better in that area.