Hope u guys won't laugh out laud in a public area o, kip it up.

Akpos' next door neighbour had a baby.

Unfortunately, the little
baby was born without ears. When they
arrived home from
the hospital, the
parents invited Akpos' family to come over and
see their new baby.

Akpos' parents
were very sure their son would make silly comments about the
baby. So, Akpos'
dad decided to have a talk with Akpos before going to the neighbour's house.

He said, "Now, son,
that poor baby was born with no ears. I want you to be on your best
behaviour and not
say one word about his ears, or I'm really going
to beat the hell out of you when we come back home."

"OK Dad. I promise, I won't mention his ears
at all," replied Akpos.

At the neighbour's house, Akpos leaned over the
crib and touched the baby's
hand. He looked at the mother and said,

"Oh, what a
beautiful little
baby!"

The mother, who had braced herself
for Akpos' comment, was
pleasantly surprised and replied;

"Thank you very much, Akpos."

Akpos then
continued, "This baby has perfect little hands and perfect little feet. Why, just look at his pretty little eyes! Did his doctor say he can see clearly?"

The mother, who was a bit surprised by Akpos' question, replied;

"Yes ... his doctor said he has a good vision. Why do you ask?"

Akpos said, "Well,
it's a good thing, because i'm very sure he can't wear glasses.

[size=18pt]Lmao!!![/size]
Akpors is a star

Welldone Van

Br3nd4: [size=18pt]Lmao!!![/size]
Akpors is a star

Welldone Van

Thanks ma

OMG this got me cracking in the office, Akpors is one cra*zy dude, keep up Van

Good job man! Hilarious stuff!

Guy u too much haha ur d best

VanTee20: Please don't just read and go away, kindly drop your comments. Thanks.

Good jokes

Huhhuhuhhhu two tifs beside' christ? Apkors is being rude oh

VanTee20: #7
CHEMISTRY CLASS
Professor: What is the chemical symbol of
Barium?
Akpors: BA, sir.
Professor: What about sodium?
Akpors: NA, sir.
Professor: What will we get if 1
atom of BA & 2 atoms of NA are
combined chemically?
Akpors: BANANA sir.

the prof na dunce..how can barium combine with sodium in the first place.

Nice jokes vanteeakpors

U re jez too much jawe

Akpors was doing his job cleaning the pilot's
cockpit in an aeroplance, when he saw a book
entitled,
“How to fly an aeroplane for beginners, Vol. 1 ".

He opened the first page which said; "To start
the engine, please press the red button".

He did so and the airplane
engine started! He was pleased and opened
the next page.

"To set airplane
moving, please press the blue button". He
did so and the plane started moving at an amazing speed!

He wanted to fly, so he opened the
3rd page which said; "To fly the airplane, please press the green button".

He did so and the
plane started flying!!! He was so happy. After 20
minutes of flying, he was
satisfied and wanted to land.

He opened to the 4th page and it read;


"To learn how to land a plane, please watch out for Volume 2!!!"

hahaha..,all dis jokes don give me 12 pack already.
Option for akpors: jst go to d nearest window nd jst 'watch out'....lol

hahaha..,all dis jokes don give me 12 pack for belle already.
Option for akpors: jst go to d nearest window nd jst 'watch out'....lol

VanTee20: #9
Two friends were smoking weed... One of them went behind a tree, removed all his clothes and came back to
his friend naked!

He stood infront of his friend and asked;

"How do I look in my new suit?"

The friend looked at him, smiled, took another puff and said "Wow!!! You look so amazing in this your suit but you put your tie below the
waist instead of putting it round your neck!"

I can't laugh it all. It seems like a joke but one Bros that is taking weed (though God has arrested him now) once told me that anytime he takes it if Goliath stand before him he will look like a day old baby, anytime I remember this statement I will just burst into laugh.

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An angry wife conversing with her husband on phone...

Wife: Where the hell are
you?

Husband: Honey, Do you remember that gold shop
where u saw a diamond
necklace and totally fell in
love with it?

Wife (in a relaxed tone): Yes I do Darling.

Husband: Remember I had no cash to buy it
for you that day & I said I'll buy it for you someday.

Wife (totally
relaxed with a smile): Yes I remember my love!

Husband: Good, I am in the barbers shop next to
that shop!

VanTee20: An angry wife conversing with her husband on phone...

Wife: Where the hell are
you?

Husband: Honey, Do you remember that gold shop
where u saw a diamond
necklace and totally fell in
love with it?

Wife (in a relaxed tone): Yes I do Darling.

Husband: Remember I had no cash to buy it
for you that day & I said I'll buy it for you someday.

Wife (totally
relaxed with a smile): Yes I remember my love!

Husband: Good, I am in the barbers shop next to
that shop!

The husband has set fire on, no be small gbege when he reachs house.

Nna tommorow make una come for my office come collect 1 mil for this joke[color=#000099][/color] [center][/center]

ur jokes make sense die but not all

@Van keep it up, your jokes are very interesting.

Akpors went to his doctor with his two ears burnt.

The doctor asked him. "What happened?"

"I was ironing my shirt and the phone rang, but
instead of picking up the phone I accidentally picked up the iron
and stuck it to my ear," Akpors explained.

"Oh Dear!" the doctor exclaimed in genuine pity.

"But what happened
to your SECOND ear?"

Akpors replied; "The Id'i'ot called again."

wonderfu...........lll i luv these

Omo; dis is eleven tati, every1 is asleep and I don't want dem to tink am mad( me laffin out loud) bros more power to ya elbow.

These are wet jokes.can't stop laughing

VanTee20: Thanks all for commenting, una too much ...

na u try pass

Hahahaha, finally i can release all d laughter i av subdue inside of me.

A female teacher was having a problem with a boy in her 3rd grade class.

The boy said. 'Ma'am, I should be in the 4th grade coz I'm smarter than my sister and she's in the 4th grade'.

The Teacher had heard enough of his complains & decided to take the boy to the Principal's office.
She explained everything to the Principal, who decided to test the
boy with some questions that a 4th grader should know.

Principal: What's 3*3?

Boy: 9

Principal: 6*6?

Boy: 36

The Principal asked the boy many more questions and he got them right. The Principal then asked the teacher to send the boy to 4th grade.

The teacher, who didn't want the boy to go easily, told the principal that she wanted to ask the boy some more questions, the Principal agreed.

Teacher: What does a cow
have 4 of, that I only 2 of?

Boy: Legs

Teacher: What starts with a C and ends with T and is hairy, oval, delicious with thin whitish
liquid?

Boy: Coconut

Teacher: What goes in hard & pink then comes out soft & sticky?

The principal's eyes open
really wide, but before he could stop the answer, the boy was taking
charge.

Boy: Bubble Gum

Teacher: U stick ur poles inside me. U tie me down 2 get me up, I get wet b4 u do. What am I?

Boy: Tent.

The principal was looking restless now.

Teacher: A finger goes in me. U fiddle with me when u're bored. The best man always has me 1stn
what am I?

Boy: Wedding Ring

Teacher: I come in many sizes. When I'm not
well, I drip. When u
blow me,u feel good?

Boy: Nose

Teacher: I've a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates,I come with a quiver

Boy: Arrow.

Teacher: What starts
wit 'F' & ends with a 'K' & if u dont get it, u have 2 use ur hand?

Boy:Fork

Teacher: Whats it that all men have, it's longer in some men than others, the Pope doesn't use his
& a man gives it 2 his wife after marriage?

Boy: Surname

Teacher: What part of the man has no bone, but has muscles with a lot of
veins & is responsible 4
making love?

Boy: Heart.

The principal let out a sigh of relief & said to the teacher: "Send
the fu'c'king boy to the University, even I got all the questions wrong!"

Errm I forgot to add, the boy's name na AKPORS...