ummsulaym: mahram issue...
In a situation where someone from your husband family(a male) lives with you and your husband, he isn't your mahram but because he still underage makes him one... Years later, he's matured enough and normally, if he was an outsider, you should not display your adorements before him nor come in physical contact with him or staying alone with him in a place but since he grew up under your custody and now turned a non-mahram but yet, lives with you, being on hijab 247 in your husband's house wont just work neither will staying in ur room 247 just to avoid being together when ur hubby goes out and some other stuffs like that...
What's your advice under this circumstance?
Send him out or live such a pressurizing life in your habibi's house?

Why should the husband in the first instance bring in someone into the home and make the wife uncomfortable in her own home.

Did they (the relatives) not have a home prior to the couple getting married ?

Its a recipe for disaster, the woman has the right to her privacy , this is not of Islam.

And by the way it applies to both sides of the family i.e husbands and wives side.

These are the little mistakes we bring in from culture that mess up marriages

The couples should have their privacy to themselves to get to know and understand each other better.

Me personally will never do this, I see no reason why someone should be disturbing my flow for my house

Sissie:

Salam, once he grows up and becomes a non mahram, you send him out, he should go back to his family house, your habibi can still pay for his upkeep.

ummsulaym: @Deen4me
kinda funny though but that's the truth...

Think that's an issue i shouldn't forget to discuss prior to nikkah...

@all, do you know islamic stand on adoption?
P.s: not cuz you dont have children of your own but would just like to

Sissie:
He/she can't bear your name as its surname because he's not your child, he has to bear his/her own name.

ummsulaym:

but from an orphanage where neither the mum nor the dad is known, whose name does he/she bears as surname?

kubby04: Salam, once he grows up and becomes a non mahram, you send him out, he should go back to his family house, your habibi can still pay for his upkeep.
That doesn't sound realistic. Usually, in such situations, even d husband can't refuse to takE d kid in unless he wants to make life difficult for his wife.

Sissie:

It is realistic.

I dont understand he can't take the kid in unless he wants to make life difficult for her? How?

kubby04: Are u saying she can't travel down with her Brother-in-law & his family cos he's not her Mahram?

ibit-abid-qudrt:


not me, but sorry it appears as the rules go, that she cant travel with non-Mahram. but now d case is that , u said they are supposed to travel with the brother in laws' family right.so d family are lyk mahrams of the brother in law. lyk i m looking at it in d light of being alone with non-mahram now, cos one can be with a non-mahram man, provided the man's mahram(e.gfemale) are ther with hiim. but i dont know if that applies o travelling. Probably some more knowledgeable person, could enlighten us on this matter?. d brothers r also welkom to chip in.

ibit-abid-qudrt:


not me, but sorry it appears as the rules go, that she cant travel with non-Mahram. but now d case is that , u said they are supposed to travel with the brother in laws' family right.so d family are lyk mahrams of the brother in law. lyk i m looking at it in d light of being alone with non-mahram now, cos one can be with a non-mahram man, provided the man's mahram(e.gfemale) are ther with hiim. but i dont know if that applies o travelling. Probably some more knowledgeable person, could enlighten us on this matter?. d brothers r also welkom to chip in.

ummsulaym: This message is no doubt a little late cuz I have been very busy, though been peeping @ nairaland. Well, it's better late than never
********To my sweet family on NL*******
Earth can forget rotating, birds can forget flying, candle can forget melting, heart can forget beating *******BUT******* Umm-Sulaym couldn't forget to wish you ''happy Eid-Ul-Adha''
May the noor of the Eid illuminate your heart, mind, soul and may all your prayers be answered... Remember me in your prayers.... *********EID MUBARAQ********

ummsulaym: tnx sis...
But do u think there is any song or kind of music supported by islam? Have been hearing different things about that topic.... Some said it's haram in entirety, some said its ok if it doesnt have beatings while some others says beating or not, as long as the song content isn't offensive to Islam... Tnx again sis

Sissie:

Nasheeds are allowed islamically

songs with the local drum (I have forgotten what the drum is called) is allowed but the song contents must not be offensive to Islam, with bad words e.t.c.

music with instrumentals I.e piano, guitar is not.

If it's haram in its entirety then it means nasheeds are haram too, which is not true.

Will try and get some reference for this.

HSM*:


it's called duff drums

ummsulaym: I didn't see sis sissie and sis deols yesterday o and I missed una... Hope all is well? Guess sis deols' absence is majorly as a result of her 'Idawo'... Whoever gets in contacts with her should say me success to her... I miss her posts

ummsulaym: I didn't see sis sissie and sis deols yesterday o and I missed una... Hope all is well? Guess sis deols' absence is majorly as a result of her 'Idawo'... Whoever gets in contacts with her should say me success to her... I miss her posts

deols:

Thank you dear.. I already said that in my reply.

It is never too much though..

Yh! it was d idanwo..done wv it but I am still quite busy.

Sissie:

Salam, how was it, pray you ace it.

deols:


Amin
Thank you..twas good. alhamdulillah

Sissie:

Nice, alhamdulillah. Oya come back and start posting, I miss you oh.