For some women, relationships are tedious, painful and heartbreaking. Whether you believe it or not, there are beautiful, God fearing, well mannered and cultured women who just don't have the luck of meeting good Men. Some ladies have to put up with the fact that some Men won't want anything to do with them once the "no sex before marriage" rule comes up. They are caught between spirituality and attachment.

As a result of this, is Single motherhood an option? Is it possible to fill up the Vacuum with motherhood either by adoption, IVF or any other means? Some women in this situations maybe like "lemme just have a child or two kid and spend my life taking care of them instead of putting up with the pain of heartbreak and hurt from a man". The pressure from Family makes it worse with comments like "you are not getting any younger", "when are you bringing home your boyfriend", "early marriage is the best", your family expects this because you are a beautiful, God fearing well mannered and cultured woman so therefore, you are a big catch for guys. But they are wrong about this, being all of these is not just enough, there are still wolves out there making it hard to have a decent man, talk more of a "fiance".
Is it crazy to want to be a single mother ,what are we to make of this?

kennygee: For some women, relationships are tedious, painful and heartbreaking. Whether you believe it or not, there are beautiful, God fearing, well mannered and cultured women who just don't have the luck of meeting good Men. Some ladies have to put up with the fact that some Men won't want anything to do with them once the "no sex before marriage" rule comes up. They are caught between spirituality and attachment.

As a result of this, is Single motherhood an option? Is it possible to fill up the Vacuum with motherhood either by adoption, IVF or any other means? Some women in this situations maybe like "lemme just have a child or two kid and spend my life taking care of them instead of putting up with the pain of heartbreak and hurt from a man". The pressure from Family makes it worse with comments like "you are not getting any younger", "when are you bringing home your boyfriend", "early marriage is the best", your family expects this because you are a beautiful, God fearing well mannered and cultured woman so therefore, you are a big catch for guys. But they are wrong about this, being all of these is not just enough, there are still wolves out there making it hard to have a decent man, talk more of a "fiance".
Is it crazy to want to be a single mother ,what are we to make of this?

Its not crazy,. All to their oppinion.

It is a Crazy thought....

Only if such women know the effect of bringing up a children attimes without a Dad...

Who says its easy to single-handedly bring up a child...

I've thought of it too. Doesn't sound easy, but it's not impossible neither is it a crazy thought.

No body said it is easy but there are people doing it, divorced women, widows.

You will live with that decision for the rest of your life even if you get the advise.

In this part of the world, its a strange thought.

who cares? If that will make you happier, good and fine.

Whether you believe it or not, there are beautiful, God fearing, well mannered and cultured women who just don't have the luck of meeting good Men.
When it is about relationship, I do not believe in luck. It takes conscious effort, will and skill as well as sincerity for relationships to thrive. Knowing the right things to look out for in a person will go a long way in choosing the right partner. If we are to dissect the hidden things of the heart of those you called God fearing, well mannered and cultured women, you will understand that they were not sincere with their choices in one way or the other. Though they may have put up sanctimonious attitude but most got what they bargained for. It brings to mind the passage that says ".....the wayfarer, though they are fools, will not err therein..." Sincerity of purpose is an important factor in relationships.


Some ladies have to put up with the fact that some Men won't want anything to do with them once the "no sex before marriage" rule comes up. They are caught between spirituality and attachment.

Nobody is caught up between anything. If the ladies have principles and know what they want, threats from men will not make them compromise their stand. Why is it that it is the ladies who claim to be subdued by men choices. Every lady has an option to say NO to sex before marriage. If he can threaten you of leaving without sex, you also have a choice to threaten him of leaving if he can't hold his vessel in dignity. I wonder why you ladies always fail to understand that when there is a pure and undiluted love, your intending partner will always seek to make you happy, fulfilled and add values to your life. Sex is only an icing on the cake when it comes to love. Sex will not make any man take you to the altar except for minute percentage. If you give in to sex, do not blame any man, it is because you want it

As a result of this, is Single motherhood an option?

Is this question from a defeatist mind? If single motherhood is what you want, it should not be because of experience from a ruthless guy, it should rather be because it is what you dream of doing. Meanwhile, the spe-rm that will fertilize your egg will come from a man not an alien. Why not be patient for a right man to enjoy the joy that true union brings.

Is it possible to fill up the Vacuum with motherhood either by adoption, IVF or any other means?

I am sorry, emotional vacuum and attention from the opposite sex for someone who craves it cannot be filled with what you described above. There is a reason why you initially yearned for it. The best bet is filled the vacuum with a good man. Put a round peg in a round hole.

Some women in this situations maybe like "lemme just have a child or two kid and spend my life taking care of them instead of putting up with the pain of heartbreak and hurt from a man".

Speak for yourself ma'am. The child will come from a man and not an alien. Why would you want to bring a child into the world that will lack fatherly love and care. If it is a sper-m donor you seek, it is a great disservice to the innocent child. Life should not be about "Me and Me alone". Making a mistake is entirely different from setting out to bring a child who will lack his/her father's love. In my opinion, this is height of selfishness.


The pressure from Family makes it worse with comments like "you are not getting any younger", "when are you bringing home your boyfriend", "early marriage is the best", your family expects this because you are a beautiful, God fearing well mannered and cultured woman so therefore, you are a big catch for guys

When your family mounts pressure on you about getting a man, read them your riot act. My mum once tried it but I gave her an appropriate response, she never bothered to ask me questions again till when I was ready. There is a reason you are an adult. Can anybody mount pressure on you to commit suicide or set yourself ablaze (excluding the Tunisian guy)? If nobody can put you under pressure to do this, nobody should put you under pressure to marry.

But they are wrong about this, Yes, they are

being all of these is not just enough Yes, it is not enough. You must also be sincere with your purpose.

there are still wolves out there making it hard to have a decent man, talk more of a "fiance". Yes, there are wolves and lions out there among men and women alike. However, with patience, sincerity and God on your side, they are not difficult to spot. No matter their skills, a wolf is easy to identify if you are not being ruled by emotions. The brain is a powerful tool.

Is it crazy to want to be a single mother ,what are we to make of this?

I don't know if it is crazy or weird. All I know is that, you still need a man to end up being a single mother. If you are completely scared of men, there are too many children in orphanages in need of adoption. You can adopt one of them. What can you make of it? Life does not begin and end with a man. My final point, despite what you have gone through in the past, there are still good guys out there. Plan, prepare and pray for a blissful union than the defeatist mind you are creeping into. It is well with you...

Well niggaz are willing.

Its just abnormal and abnormality is usually called crazy u know.

No it's not crazy, if you think you are ready and can provide for him, then go ahead.
Better than waiting and dying alone and lonely at old age.

bellong: Whether you believe it or not, there are beautiful, God fearing, well mannered and cultured women who just don't have the luck of meeting good Men.
When it is about relationship, I do not believe in luck. It takes conscious effort, will and skill as well as sincerity for relationships to thrive. Knowing the right things to look out for in a person will go a long way in choosing the right partner. If we are to dissect the hidden things of the heart of those you called God fearing, well mannered and cultured women, you will understand that they were not sincere with their choices in one way or the other. Though they may have put up sanctimonious attitude but most got what they bargained for. It brings to mind the passage that says ".....the wayfarer, though they are fools, will not err therein..." Sincerity of purpose is an important factor in relationships.


Some ladies have to put up with the fact that some Men won't want anything to do with them once the "no sex before marriage" rule comes up. They are caught between spirituality and attachment.

Nobody is caught up between anything. If the ladies have principles and know what they want, threats from men will not make them compromise their stand. Why is it that it is the ladies who claim to be subdued by men choices. Every lady has an option to say NO to sex before marriage. If he can threaten you of leaving without sex, you also have a choice to threaten him of leaving if he can't hold his vessel in dignity. I wonder why you ladies always fail to understand that when there is a pure and undiluted love, your intending partner will always seek to make you happy, fulfilled and add values to your life. Sex is only an icing on the cake when it comes to love. Sex will not make any man take you to the altar except for minute percentage. If you give in to sex, do not blame any man, it is because you want it

As a result of this, is Single motherhood an option?

Is this question from a defeatist mind? If single motherhood is what you want, it should not be because of experience from a ruthless guy, it should rather be because it is what you dream of doing. Meanwhile, the spe-rm that will fertilize your egg will come from a man not an alien. Why not be patient for a right man to enjoy the joy that true union brings.

Is it possible to fill up the Vacuum with motherhood either by adoption, IVF or any other means?

I am sorry, emotional vacuum and attention from the opposite sex for someone who craves it cannot be filled with what you described above. There is a reason why you initially yearned for it. The best bet is filled the vacuum with a good man. Put a round peg in a round hole.

Some women in this situations maybe like "lemme just have a child or two kid and spend my life taking care of them instead of putting up with the pain of heartbreak and hurt from a man".

Speak for yourself ma'am. The child will come from a man and not an alien. Why would you want to bring a child into the world that will lack fatherly love and care. If it is a sper-m donor you seek, it is a great disservice to the innocent child. Life should not be about "Me and Me alone". Making a mistake is entirely different from setting out to bring a child who will lack his/her father's love. In my opinion, this is height of selfishness.


The pressure from Family makes it worse with comments like "you are not getting any younger", "when are you bringing home your boyfriend", "early marriage is the best", your family expects this because you are a beautiful, God fearing well mannered and cultured woman so therefore, you are a big catch for guys

When your family mounts pressure on you about getting a man, read them your riot act. My mum once tried it but I gave her an appropriate response, she never bothered to ask me questions again till when I was ready. There is a reason you are an adult. Can anybody mount pressure on you to commit suicide or set yourself ablaze (excluding the Tunisian guy)? If nobody can put you under pressure to do this, nobody should put you under pressure to marry.

But they are wrong about this, Yes, they are

being all of these is not just enough Yes, it is not enough. You must also be sincere with your purpose.

there are still wolves out there making it hard to have a decent man, talk more of a "fiance". Yes, there are wolves and lions out there among men and women alike. However, with patience, sincerity and God on your side, they are not difficult to spot. No matter their skills, a wolf is easy to identify if you are not being ruled by emotions. The brain is a powerful tool.

Is it crazy to want to be a single mother ,what are we to make of this?

I don't know if it is crazy or weird. All I know is that, you still need a man to end up being a single mother. If you are completely scared of men, there are too many children in orphanages in need of adoption. You can adopt one of them. What can you make of it? Life does not begin and end with a man. My final point, despite what you have gone through in the past, there are still good guys out there. Plan, prepare and pray for a blissful union than the defeatist mind you are creeping into. It is well with you...

Interesting comments, but no one sad it is about me. We were just discussing this in the office and i decided to post it. Most women in this category are sincere.

kennygee:

Interesting comments, but no one sad it is about me. We were just discussing this in the office and i decided to post it. Most women in this category are sincere.

1. There is no place I mentioned your handle in my post.

2. Are you by chance a mind reader to know the sincerity of people? Do you have enough figures and statistics to back up your claim that most of the women are sincere? Well, they may be sincere and sincerely wrong due to their unseen interest.

whatever you say. There are sincere women who just want to meet good men and settle down.

kennygee: For some women, relationships are tedious, painful and heartbreaking. Whether you believe it or not, there are beautiful, God fearing, well mannered and cultured women who just don't have the luck of meeting good Men. Some ladies have to put up with the fact that some Men won't want anything to do with them once the "no sex before marriage" rule comes up. They are caught between spirituality and attachment.

As a result of this, is Single motherhood an option? Is it possible to fill up the Vacuum with motherhood either by adoption, IVF or any other means? Some women in this situations maybe like "lemme just have a child or two kid and spend my life taking care of them instead of putting up with the pain of heartbreak and hurt from a man". The pressure from Family makes it worse with comments like "you are not getting any younger", "when are you bringing home your boyfriend", "early marriage is the best", your family expects this because you are a beautiful, God fearing well mannered and cultured woman so therefore, you are a big catch for guys. But they are wrong about this, being all of these is not just enough, there are still wolves out there making it hard to have a decent man, talk more of a "fiance".
Is it crazy to want to be a single mother ,what are we to make of this?

the summary of ur writ up is dat u are afraid of relationship.
So u take a short cut wìc is :get yanshed and get preg,av ur baby
and live life hapily 4ever




but u are goin to get the shock of ur life wen u understand dat >>>

kennygee: No body said it is easy but there are people doing it, divorced women, widows.

i neva pray 4 any woman in this world to see what their eye dey see!

@ OP the answer is very simple....but first....where you raised by only your mum? Did you enjoy the contributions of your father in your life? I think that most women who think like this are either in these two categories. Either they have father issues or they are homosexual women. I am a man and must confess to you that sometimes I wonder whether women have any significant value they add to a man's life apart from maybe bearing children. But then I remember that God made them specifically to be help mate to men( No apologies to feminists!), I remember the importance and the fulfillment of sharing my life with another person- a woman who is created to be different, to bring a different perspective to life and my love for women rekindles! My dear, it is all about sharing. Ask yourself, why are you afraid of sharing your life? I think the problem lies with you. You are afraid to trust another person, you are afraid to give another your love.....please tell us why?

This is not about me like i have said before. The women i am talking about have been in relationships but were hurt or heartbroken. They have fathers who are present in their lives too.

kennygee: This is not about me like i have said before. The women i am talking about have been in relationships but were hurt or heartbroken. They have fathers who are present in their lives too.

then it is not an urge.but som1 living in fear!
But like i said widows,divorcee(i no pray 4 any woman to see wetin den take their eye see)

kennygee: This is not about me like i have said before. The women i am talking about have been in relationships but were hurt or heartbroken. They have fathers who are present in their lives too.

Sorry, I thought you were posting on your behalf. Their excuse is very laughable. It is like saying you will not enter taxis because again because of accidents! or that you will never repeat an exam you failed because you are afraid of failure.

I dont care being a single mom. If It's what i dreamed of becoming then i'l do it. Its from within you and not cos others are talking of doing it. It's not being crazy. Afterall,there are many single mom who brought up their children alone. So why give a damn or carry another persons problem on your head.
If It's your decision to be a single mom,then fine.

Cykik: I dont care being a single mom. If It's what i dreamed of becoming then i'l do it. Its from within you and not cos others are talking of doing it. It's not being crazy. Afterall,there are many single mom who brought up their children alone. So why give a damn or carry another persons problem on your head.
If It's your decision to be a single mom,then fine.

be careful of want u wish for!

OP, sincerely u read my mind o! Dis commitment 2 a man is not really my thing sha.

Nywys, may God help us. Just dat my mum musnt no my plans, she'll just be hypertensive. But all dese wifely tinz, I really don't want.

Cykik: I dont care being a single mom. If It's what i dreamed of becoming then i'l do it. Its from within you and not cos others are talking of doing it. It's not being crazy. Afterall,there are many single mom who brought up their children alone. So why give a damn or carry another persons problem on your head.
If It's your decision to be a single mom,then fine.

Being hurt and heart broken is part of living! Those your friends are also guilty of breaking other peoples hearts! Ultimately, it is their decision but they shouldnt hinge it on men breaking their hearts. STOP BLAMING MEN

dahmie2013: OP, sincerely u read my mind o! Dis commitment 2 a man is not really my thing sha.

Nywys, may God help us. Just dat my mum musnt no my plans, she'll just be hypertensive. But all dese wifely tinz, I really don't want.

because u feel comfortable living in fear about what?

baralatie:
because u feel comfortable living in fear about what?

Its not abt fear, I just lost interest in things like dat! My mum will say she married so her girls must. But its not like hers was a good one though, its d type I don't even pray 4 my enemy, but u no parents&their marriage fantasies 4 deir kids. I have everything worked out, I hope it clicks d way I want it 2.

dahmie2013:

Its not abt fear, I just lost interest in things like dat! My mum will say she married so her girls must. But its not like hers was a good one though, its d type I don't even pray 4 my enemy, but u no parents&their marriage fantasies 4 deir kids. I have everything worked out, I hope it clicks d way I want it 2.

u say its not fear but in what u experience/saw and u dont want to experience it.

I av had a lot of single moms.it is the toughest thing a woman can go through!please read my comments about my take.try and study single moms(widows are the worst hit),divorcees,or absentee husbands,runaway husbands or forced motherhood!
I giv respect to any woman who can say in this world that they survived witout any form of support,luv,family,friend etc. They cant last 1yr intact.
This is exclude oda stuf.

@dahmie
as a woman u av been blessed wit a gift of life.u cant walk in fear of men.u wil see them everyday at the office,market,neighbor,school everywhere.
Understand how to shift a gud husband 4rm a bad husband.u do fine when ur time is ready.always remain prayful.

^^^^ tanks bro!

I don't see anything wrong there. If she can sufficiently provide for herself nd d child, nd also raise d child up properly.

The Happiness of a woman who is fulfilled with her full family can't be compared with the Happiness of a woman who is with Kids but without Husband !!


It is not crazy being a single mum as far as such provides solution to your predicament !!


Notto belle : when a 'MAN' is sandwiched between two problems, he tends to suffered with the less severe one ...... Donroxy !