@ OP We are just in too similar shoes
I've written a similar experience to post on nairaland recently but was afraid that people that knows me in nairaland will deduce from the story that i am the one. I just opened a new nairaland I.D to be anonymous. Poster, your own is moi-moi case compared to what am passing through. MARRYING MY WIFE IS THE GREATEST MISTAKE I MADE IN MY LIFE. 2hrs will not be able to finish narrating the first paragraph if am to narrate the hell am passing through. For instance, as am typing this now, since Jan 2nd 2014 I've not been talking with my wife, only good morning and me dropping money for family upkeep. She can keep the face-off till Jesus returns. Whats the problem? I was to take my relation who stays with my bedridden mother to village on 2nd as my younger siblings have traveled to village. Then on 1st I told my wife to prepare with the kids by 7am next morning being 2nd that i will drive them to go and stay with my mother as i drive with the relation to village for a 9.am scheduled village meeting and to come back same day. My village is barely an 1hour journey. I woke up early around 6am and tapped her to wake and start preparing but she shouted at me. Later by 8:20 she is still putting on towel to go and bath, then I told her am leaving to go and pick the relation as time is already against us, that she should then transport herself to go and stay with my mum. Our residence is not up to 10mins drive to my parents place. I then left to village, while in village I tried calling her and my mother but due to network limitation i couldn't get them. To my greatest surprise around 4pm while in village my mother was able to reach us on phone and told me that she didn't see my wife again and have not taken her lunch as she hardly moves around with her clutches due to her health challenges. I tried calling my wife again and network was telling me switched off repeatedly. I cut short everything in village and speed off back to town and met my mother stranded alone, I almost shed tears seeing her. Then back to my house, I met my wife watching cable tv, I asked her why she didn't go to my mother again, she asked me while I left her instead of exercising little more patience waiting for her to bath and by the way how do i expect her to take public transport with 2 kids? (not up to 10mins transport). Since then I cut off communication with her in anger as I can't beat her, I can't send her packing due to my religious family upbringing. In fact my mother now is telling me to forget about what she did, that it was just the devil at work. She is a core christian.

Am tired of typing, this is just a tip of the iceberg of the devil am living with as wife. May God punish the day i first set my eyes on this lady

Op dyevorce her

opetu: My wife has been a torn on my flesh, giving me headaches daily. It happens dat I met her in my final year in school (fellowship), we got close just as friends nd within 7 mnths of knowing her one thing led to the other nd she got pregnant for me, well i accepted my responsibilty. telling my parents also, It was actually a thing of mixed feelingz, bein dat i am the only child of my parentz, at least thats like having a second child for dem. Long story short i decided to marry her cos of the baby..wit the notion dat we woud build our early relationship in marriage ..

Now issue is dat My wife doesnt like d idea when my parent come see me in my home, alwayz grummble, she doesn have a close relationship wit my mom, mom is alwayz sad about this..I ve been married for 5years now, ma kids ve only visited my parents for a week, anytime i bring up d idea of dem goin to see them..we always quarell!! just last week sunday ma parents left their home so dey come take d kids for d nu year break, i ddnt tell ma wife, but she found out, it was a fight that happened ....wit her tearing my clothes.. my old man nd momma both cried seein dis, dey had to travel back dat evening seein dat my so called wife ddnt welcome dem in my home, Dis is just d little i can narrate !!

I have two kids now, i kinda hate having a second child wit her, now am thinking divorce, which i dnt want to, tried to b patient, but its like shez getting evil advice from sumplaces everyday, how many years more does my parents ve on earth dat i wont make dem happy at least to be wit their grandkids!! at first i thought dis was normal, or is it a normal thing for mothers to cling to their child dat way?? maybe am too soft on her!! sigh i wish i never married her d first place, i only wanted to rewrite my mistake by marryin her.

My brother, there is nothing devil cannot do. Devil wants to ruin your life by using that woman against you.
Your wife only needs deliverance as there something behind her action. Can you take her to your for deliverance if you really want to keep your home since you already got kids with her. Note she is not the one acting. It is the demon living inside her. The devil you know is better than the angels out there.

If you look at the circumstances surrounding your existence by having you as the only child goes to show that the devil actually is doing something to make sure that your parents never know peace. If I can advise you, go to SCOAN or Liberation Ministry at Ojudu and your case will be over and you will enjoy that woman.

I believe that there is spiritual manipulation to make sure that your parents suffers. God will help you. Do not seek for divorce

Op, .. .. Na wa! Well

Op, u av 2 man up!. And let yur wife knows , u r d head and not she..u av 2 put yur foot down and threathen her wit a divorce , if she doesn't change.. And if after d threats, she's still adaMant.. My dear, u av no choice than 2 send her back to her parents for proper training of human values.. Just deceieve her, that u r taking her for a treat wit d kids too.. Poor kids , sha.. Then head straight 2 her parents house and drop her there, tell the parents why u r bringing her back, so that she won't kill yur aged parents wit high bp.. Unless she cHanges b4 u can accept her back with a Live HE goat for appeasement and she must be remorseful Or leSs she should be ready to hear that she has a 2nd mate in d house, doing everything a good woman shud do in a home..Telll her parents, wit her and Dkids there all these.. And dat there can't b settlement for nw btwn u 2.. Until she stays in her father's house for one month 2 ponder on wat u want.. After one month, her parents can call u for settlement, if she wants to come back.. Let her know, u r not forcing her 2 marry u, and she's now free 2 do watever she likes with herself and kids. Then walk out on them, calmly but adaMantly.. I tell u, there will b change.. And don't drop any money for her or d kids.. Its a sacrifice , sha.. But its worth doing 2 bring her back 2 sanity.. Let Her parents feed , cloth her and d children

Austeenx: I need to see the picture of her, tearing your shirt, or it didn't happen.

Can't u be serious for once ?

opetu:

I really dont know..but witches..ma mom bought a car for her!! my fam luvs her. dey try to relatebwitbher but she always backout. it was a wait of 8 years bfo my parents had me..its only normal for me to want them have more time with their grand kids.!! she just want me to alienate ma self from family

Op, there goes your problem and you don't seem to recognize it.
You are trying to compensate your parents with your kids and that scares her to death!
Stop trying to do that, rather seek to build a happy family and your parents should be happy with that if they are not selfish.
I feel you have a good family in your parents but you need to take out this idea of "sacrificing" your kids to your parents.
I repeat, a woman who doesn't guard her kids jealously does not worth being a mother.

She may have gone too far with the disrespect but a woman will always be emotional!
Your parents should help you build a family of yours not seek to raise your kids because they had one.
Do you expect your wife to smile at that?
I personally do not take shii from a lady but I am not going to support you with this idea of compensating your parents with your kids.

greatestmistake: @ OP We are just in too similar shoes
I've written a similar experience to post on nairaland recently but was afraid that people that knows me in nairaland will deduce from the story that i am the one. I just opened a new nairaland I.D to be anonymous. Poster, your own is moi-moi case compared to what am passing through. MARRYING MY WIFE IS THE GREATEST MISTAKE I MADE IN MY LIFE. 2hrs will not be able to finish narrating the first paragraph if am to narrate the hell am passing through. For instance, as am typing this now, since Jan 2nd 2014 I've not been talking with my wife, only good morning and me dropping money for family upkeep. She can keep the face-off till Jesus returns. Whats the problem? I was to take my relation who stays with my bedridden mother to village on 2nd as my younger siblings have traveled to village. Then on 1st I told my wife to prepare with the kids by 7am next morning being 2nd that i will drive them to go and stay with my mother as i drive with the relation to village for a 9.am scheduled village meeting and to come back same day. My village is barely an 1hour journey. I woke up early around 6am and tapped her to wake and start preparing but she shouted at me. Later by 8:20 she is still putting on towel to go and bath, then I told her am leaving to go and pick the relation as time is already against us, that she should then transport herself to go and stay with my mum. Our residence is not up to 10mins drive to my parents place. I then left to village, while in village I tried calling her and my mother but due to network limitation i couldn't get them. To my greatest surprise around 4pm while in village my mother was able to reach us on phone and told me that she didn't see my wife again and have not taken her lunch as she hardly moves around with her clutches due to her health challenges. I tried calling my wife again and network was telling me switched off repeatedly. I cut short everything in village and speed off back to town and met my mother stranded alone, I almost shed tears seeing her. Then back to my house, I met my wife watching cable tv, I asked her why she didn't go to my mother again, she asked me while I left her instead of exercising little more patience waiting for her to bath and by the way how do i expect her to take public transport with 2 kids? (not up to 10mins transport). Since then I cut off communication with her in anger as I can't beat her, I can't send her packing due to my religious family upbringing. In fact my mother now is telling me to forget about what she did, that it was just the devil at work. She is a core christian.

Am tired of typing, this is just a tip of the iceberg of the devil am living with as wife. May God punish the day i first set my eyes on this lady

I think your situation is different and it seems there were underlying issues. That though does not excuse what she did. It is almost unforgivable but there always has to be room for forgiveness in marriage. Its what separates the men from the boys, women from the girls. Even if your mom attempted to murder her the fact that she is now disabled and was left hungry just breaks my heart. She is more fragile than the kids. I think you should not have told your mom what happened. You should have just told her there was a breakdown in communication and something was not properly passed across.
I don't really understand silent treatment. It cannot be effective. You need to communicate this to her in the strongest possible way "mama was left to starve because you chose not to help her". Honestly people do this for total strangers everyday. It is hard to imagine why she would do it to her children's grandma. Please don't let this go by choosing not to discuss it.

greatestmistake: @ OP We are just in too similar shoes
I've written a similar experience to post on nairaland recently but was afraid that people that knows me in nairaland will deduce from the story that i am the one. I just opened a new nairaland I.D to be anonymous. Poster, your own is moi-moi case compared to what am passing through. MARRYING MY WIFE IS THE GREATEST MISTAKE I MADE IN MY LIFE. 2hrs will not be able to finish narrating the first paragraph if am to narrate the hell am passing through. For instance, as am typing this now, since Jan 2nd 2014 I've not been talking with my wife, only good morning and me dropping money for family upkeep. She can keep the face-off till Jesus returns. Whats the problem? I was to take my relation who stays with my bedridden mother to village on 2nd as my younger siblings have traveled to village. Then on 1st I told my wife to prepare with the kids by 7am next morning being 2nd that i will drive them to go and stay with my mother as i drive with the relation to village for a 9.am scheduled village meeting and to come back same day. My village is barely an 1hour journey. I woke up early around 6am and tapped her to wake and start preparing but she shouted at me. Later by 8:20 she is still putting on towel to go and bath, then I told her am leaving to go and pick the relation as time is already against us, that she should then transport herself to go and stay with my mum. Our residence is not up to 10mins drive to my parents place. I then left to village, while in village I tried calling her and my mother but due to network limitation i couldn't get them. To my greatest surprise around 4pm while in village my mother was able to reach us on phone and told me that she didn't see my wife again and have not taken her lunch as she hardly moves around with her clutches due to her health challenges. I tried calling my wife again and network was telling me switched off repeatedly. I cut short everything in village and speed off back to town and met my mother stranded alone, I almost shed tears seeing her. Then back to my house, I met my wife watching cable tv, I asked her why she didn't go to my mother again, she asked me while I left her instead of exercising little more patience waiting for her to bath and by the way how do i expect her to take public transport with 2 kids? (not up to 10mins transport). Since then I cut off communication with her in anger as I can't beat her, I can't send her packing due to my religious family upbringing. In fact my mother now is telling me to forget about what she did, that it was just the devil at work. She is a core christian.


Am tired of typing, this is just a tip of the iceberg of the devil am living with as wife. May God punish the day i first set my eyes on this lady

Wow! God bless your mother! Calm down bro nothing is too difficult for God to do ! He can and would change your wife ok? Try and read this book: the power of a praying husband. *cheers*

So we all grew up together, she was well behaved.

So our friend won the US Visa Lottery and married this childhood friend of ours, we thought we knew her, and they moved to the States.

5 Years later, my friend had lost his job for 5 months, she a Nurse, we came to Visit them from other States in the US, she was not in and our friend brought out food, drinks(non alcohol as he is born again)and was entertaining us, when she walked in from work.

We greeted her but she ignored us and went straight to the table, and with annoyance started throwing everything into the thrash, shouting that he should go look for a Job.

This is not a story, it happened to a close friend of mine in the State of Maryland. To say we were shocked is putting it mildly, but the shame my docile friend felt is something you guys need to be there to witness. He called us later to apologise and said he will divorce her, they are still married years later and his excuse? They have two kids together so he can't leave his kids because of her.

I bring this story up because it is easy for US to advice, but what binds this people together goes beyond what the OP is saying.

And that is why MARRIAGE is not something you do out of pity, or the fact she is pregnant, or like the one J said that I married her because the way she is always screaming when we make love DEY scatter my head.

Marriage is not a societal status thing my friend, so my advice to you is simple. You chose to marry her, so deal with it as a man. Btw ever heard the word CONDOM? There are repercussions for doing SESE(skin to skin)

Sometimes financial stress create more problems in most marriages. What is the financial situation at home and how much of this burden is on your wife. A bad marriage is as good as living in a cage. Sit her down and have a heart to heart talk. You were able to love each other enough to make another baby after the first one. Have her open her heart to you and both of you can make amends. If that does not work, see her as your little red wagon you either push or pull. Divorce is hard especially on your kids and polygamy is the worst thing you can wish on yourself and your kids eventually.

Amelian: Op, u av 2 man up!. And let yur wife knows , u r d head and not she..u av 2 put yur foot down and threathen her wit a divorce , if she doesn't change.. And if after d threats, she's still adaMant.. My dear, u av no choice than 2 send her back to her parents for proper training of human values.. Just deceieve her, that u r taking her for a treat wit d kids too.. Poor kids , sha.. Then head straight 2 her parents house and drop her there, tell the parents why u r bringing her back, so that she won't kill yur aged parents wit high bp.. Unless she cHanges b4 u can accept her back with a Live HE goat for appeasement and she must be remorseful Or leSs she should be ready to hear that she has a 2nd mate in d house, doing everything a good woman shud do in a home..Telll her parents, wit her and Dkids there all these.. And dat there can't b settlement for nw btwn u 2.. Until she stays in her father's house for one month 2 ponder on wat u want.. After one month, her parents can call u for settlement, if she wants to come back.. Let her know, u r not forcing her 2 marry u, and she's now free 2 do watever she likes with herself and kids. Then walk out on them, calmly but adaMantly.. I tell u, there will b change.. And don't drop any money for her or d kids.. Its a sacrifice , sha.. But its worth doing 2 bring her back 2 sanity.. Let Her parents feed , cloth her and d children

He did not marry a pauper. She's a medical doctor like her husband. Good lawd. Honestly you sound like you're advicing a native doctor who married a tomato seller. Goat. Settlement. Second mate. Geez.

greatestmistake: @ OP We are just in too similar shoes
I've written a similar experience to post on nairaland recently but was afraid that people that knows me in nairaland will deduce from the story that i am the one. I just opened a new nairaland I.D to be anonymous. Poster, your own is moi-moi case compared to what am passing through. MARRYING MY WIFE IS THE GREATEST MISTAKE I MADE IN MY LIFE. 2hrs will not be able to finish narrating the first paragraph if am to narrate the hell am passing through. For instance, as am typing this now, since Jan 2nd 2014 I've not been talking with my wife, only good morning and me dropping money for family upkeep. She can keep the face-off till Jesus returns. Whats the problem? I was to take my relation who stays with my bedridden mother to village on 2nd as my younger siblings have traveled to village. Then on 1st I told my wife to prepare with the kids by 7am next morning being 2nd that i will drive them to go and stay with my mother as i drive with the relation to village for a 9.am scheduled village meeting and to come back same day. My village is barely an 1hour journey. I woke up early around 6am and tapped her to wake and start preparing but she shouted at me. Later by 8:20 she is still putting on towel to go and bath, then I told her am leaving to go and pick the relation as time is already against us, that she should then transport herself to go and stay with my mum. Our residence is not up to 10mins drive to my parents place. I then left to village, while in village I tried calling her and my mother but due to network limitation i couldn't get them. To my greatest surprise around 4pm while in village my mother was able to reach us on phone and told me that she didn't see my wife again and have not taken her lunch as she hardly moves around with her clutches due to her health challenges. I tried calling my wife again and network was telling me switched off repeatedly. I cut short everything in village and speed off back to town and met my mother stranded alone, I almost shed tears seeing her. Then back to my house, I met my wife watching cable tv, I asked her why she didn't go to my mother again, she asked me while I left her instead of exercising little more patience waiting for her to bath and by the way how do i expect her to take public transport with 2 kids? (not up to 10mins transport). Since then I cut off communication with her in anger as I can't beat her, I can't send her packing due to my religious family upbringing. In fact my mother now is telling me to forget about what she did, that it was just the devil at work. She is a core christian.

Am tired of typing, this is just a tip of the iceberg of the devil am living with as wife. May God punish the day i first set my eyes on this lady

I can't believe your wife would allow your bedridden mother to starve. Is this a one time incident? This is too much.

greatestmistake: @ OP We are just in too similar shoes
I've written a similar experience to post on nairaland recently but was afraid that people that knows me in nairaland will deduce from the story that i am the one. I just opened a new nairaland I.D to be anonymous. Poster, your own is moi-moi case compared to what am passing through. MARRYING MY WIFE IS THE GREATEST MISTAKE I MADE IN MY LIFE. 2hrs will not be able to finish narrating the first paragraph if am to narrate the hell am passing through. For instance, as am typing this now, since Jan 2nd 2014 I've not been talking with my wife, only good morning and me dropping money for family upkeep. She can keep the face-off till Jesus returns. Whats the problem? I was to take my relation who stays with my bedridden mother to village on 2nd as my younger siblings have traveled to village. Then on 1st I told my wife to prepare with the kids by 7am next morning being 2nd that i will drive them to go and stay with my mother as i drive with the relation to village for a 9.am scheduled village meeting and to come back same day. My village is barely an 1hour journey. I woke up early around 6am and tapped her to wake and start preparing but she shouted at me. Later by 8:20 she is still putting on towel to go and bath, then I told her am leaving to go and pick the relation as time is already against us, that she should then transport herself to go and stay with my mum. Our residence is not up to 10mins drive to my parents place. I then left to village, while in village I tried calling her and my mother but due to network limitation i couldn't get them. To my greatest surprise around 4pm while in village my mother was able to reach us on phone and told me that she didn't see my wife again and have not taken her lunch as she hardly moves around with her clutches due to her health challenges. I tried calling my wife again and network was telling me switched off repeatedly. I cut short everything in village and speed off back to town and met my mother stranded alone, I almost shed tears seeing her. Then back to my house, I met my wife watching cable tv, I asked her why she didn't go to my mother again, she asked me while I left her instead of exercising little more patience waiting for her to bath and by the way how do i expect her to take public transport with 2 kids? (not up to 10mins transport). Since then I cut off communication with her in anger as I can't beat her, I can't send her packing due to my religious family upbringing. In fact my mother now is telling me to forget about what she did, that it was just the devil at work. She is a core christian.

Am tired of typing, this is just a tip of the iceberg of the devil am living with as wife. May God punish the day i first set my eyes on this lady

Mr Man, but really? Is this what you called hell on earth? Guy, you need to really educate yourself on the nature of women. What you are calling irrational behaviour is justifiable action in her sight and you have to come to her level, because she is the weaker sex. True, her actions were disgraceful, but nobody is perfect: you have this expectation of her that she doesn't understand. Move beyond yourself and think of ways you can encourage her to behave better, not cursing the day you met her.

you want advice and you're using shorthand.

This is a fallout of too short courtship (7months). U never had enough time to study each other well.
Well marriage is for better for worse. Your wife is your cross, u have to bear....unfortunately.
How is your communication as a couple? Sit her down in her happy moment and explain why your kids must spend time with your parents.
Also take your kids to visit them on your own....they are your kids! Pray for Gods guidance and intervention but work it out, don't contemplate divorce, abeg for d children's sake
My humble submission

.....

TechWalker007:

Op, there goes your problem and you don't seem to recognize it.
You are trying to compensate your parents with your kids and that scares her to death!
Stop trying to do that, rather seek to build a happy family and your parents should be happy with that if they are not selfish.
I feel you have a good family in your parents but you need to take out this idea of "sacrificing" your kids to your parents.
I repeat, a woman who doesn't guard her kids jealously does not worth being a mother.

She may have gone too far with the disrespect but a woman will always be emotional!
Your parents should help you build a family of yours not seek to raise your kids because they had one.
Do you expect your wife to smile at that?
I personally do not take shii from a lady but I am not going to support you with this idea of compensating your parents with your kids.

There's really no justification for his wife's selfishness! We are not talking about complete strangers here! We're talking about his parents!!! Jeez!

@OP, your wife is really mean! Her attitude is really horrible. If leaving her will make you happy, please do! Never make the mistake of being trapped in an unhappy marriage just for the sake of how it'll look to people if you leave. Life is too short to spend it being unhappy. Please follow your bliss.

one day both husband and wife will read about their internal problems on nairaland

I feel you have been a little soft on her. I may be wrong though.

This marriage thing, definitely not looking forward to it.

May God grant us a partner that will make us happy always. Amen.

greatestmistake: @ OP We are just in too similar shoes
I've written a similar experience to post on nairaland recently but was afraid that people that knows me in nairaland will deduce from the story that i am the one. I just opened a new nairaland I.D to be anonymous. Poster, your own is moi-moi case compared to what am passing through. MARRYING MY WIFE IS THE GREATEST MISTAKE I MADE IN MY LIFE. 2hrs will not be able to finish narrating the first paragraph if am to narrate the hell am passing through. For instance, as am typing this now, since Jan 2nd 2014 I've not been talking with my wife, only good morning and me dropping money for family upkeep. She can keep the face-off till Jesus returns. Whats the problem? I was to take my relation who stays with my bedridden mother to village on 2nd as my younger siblings have traveled to village. Then on 1st I told my wife to prepare with the kids by 7am next morning being 2nd that i will drive them to go and stay with my mother as i drive with the relation to village for a 9.am scheduled village meeting and to come back same day. My village is barely an 1hour journey. I woke up early around 6am and tapped her to wake and start preparing but she shouted at me. Later by 8:20 she is still putting on towel to go and bath, then I told her am leaving to go and pick the relation as time is already against us, that she should then transport herself to go and stay with my mum. Our residence is not up to 10mins drive to my parents place. I then left to village, while in village I tried calling her and my mother but due to network limitation i couldn't get them. To my greatest surprise around 4pm while in village my mother was able to reach us on phone and told me that she didn't see my wife again and have not taken her lunch as she hardly moves around with her clutches due to her health challenges. I tried calling my wife again and network was telling me switched off repeatedly. I cut short everything in village and speed off back to town and met my mother stranded alone, I almost shed tears seeing her. Then back to my house, I met my wife watching cable tv, I asked her why she didn't go to my mother again, she asked me while I left her instead of exercising little more patience waiting for her to bath and by the way how do i expect her to take public transport with 2 kids? (not up to 10mins transport). Since then I cut off communication with her in anger as I can't beat her, I can't send her packing due to my religious family upbringing. In fact my mother now is telling me to forget about what she did, that it was just the devil at work. She is a core christian.

Am tired of typing, this is just a tip of the iceberg of the devil am living with as wife. May God punish the day i first set my eyes on this lady

Wow!! Ur wife is the definition of wickedness. If she had issues with u,suřely she didn't have to transfer the aggression to ur mum.Don't let this go unpunished,otherwise,it will repeat itself. Call a meeting btw u,ur mum and her and Express ur Hurt. If she has any iota of good in her, she will show remorse. If she does'nt, then only God can help u, Bro.

opetu:

I ddnt, we were both medical students nd she wasnt young, infact d whole pregnancy issue , she sure wanted it may b to trap me down, it was a one night thingy..yes i knw dats enough to get anyone pregnant, the marriage was sumthing she was happy about also.. Even in Our NYSC after marriage she started misbehaving saying i was cheating. it just a calamity marriage ..tnx..wud pray towards it

Lol @ calamity marriage

soul_glo:

He did not marry a pauper. She's a medical doctor like her husband. Good lawd. Honestly you sound like you're advicing a native doctor who married a tomato seller. Goat. Settlement. Second mate. Geez.

Does it matter whether your wife is a doctor or pepper seller for you to take certain decision? Why would a man allow his wife status or profession to intimidate him. The basic point is that you can decide to either divorce your wife or separate with her for her to learn what she lacks.

It is really difficult to advice married couples because majority of us got married for the wrong reasons,most marital decisions were made out of sentiments,emotions,infatuation etc. When the reality begins to unfold matured adults who in the presences of tens,hundreds,thousands or millions of friends,brothers,sisters,parents and well wishers as the case may be consented and say "yes" I do begin to act like toddlers. When two adults consentualy decides to live as husband and wife,they must understand that you will loose some certain things and gain some certain things...The question is what are you ready to gain and loose? let me finish my food I will come back with the second episode....OP stay tuned to be continued!

deeptesting: It is really difficult to advice married couples because majority of us got married for the wrong reasons,most marital decisions were made out of sentiments,emotions,infatuation etc. When the reality begins to unfold matured adults who in the presences of tens,hundreds,thousands or millions of friends,brothers,sisters,parents and well wishers as the case may be consented and say "yes" I do begin to act like toddlers. When two adults consentualy decides to live as husband and wife,they must understand that you will loose some certain things and gain some certain things...The question is what are you ready to gain and loose?.OP stay tuned to be continued!

Well said.

There are two sides to a story.

To be married is one thing but to SUSTAIN it is another task. We all need the help of God to survive in everything we do and marriage is no exception.

Anyone who beats a woman to submission is an ANIMAL including all those who 'liked' such violent action.

mollie12:

Mr Man, but really? Is this what you called hell on earth? Guy, you need to really educate yourself on the nature of women. What you are calling irrational behaviour is justifiable action in her sight and you have to come to her level, because she is the weaker sex. True, her actions were disgraceful, but nobody is perfect: you have this expectation of her that she doesn't understand. Move beyond yourself and think of ways you can encourage her to behave better, not cursing the day you met her.

Who is talking? A man or a woman? Or hermaphrodite? Guess someone is feeling insecure.

This is sad but there are a lot of women like this! If you love your spouse, you will be willing to make them happy. I enjoy my privacy but visiting my parents-in-law once in a while and making them feel welcome whenever they come is not too much sacrifice.

Divorce is not really the next option, but you need to step up and be the MAN that you are! You don't have to beat her(I personally see women beaters as cowards).

If she is still naughty, tell her her own peeps are no longer welcome. In fact, take a radical approach: take the kids to your parents house and leave them there for the weekend. If she talks, pick your car key and go out. Let her be alone in the house. Tell whoever cares to put their mouth what she does, especially her own people. You said you are a doctor? Go to the hospital, read, go back home later. She go tire.

Booty4me: op u deprived her of d fun she would have by gettin her pregnant and marrying her immediately.. dats d after effect of it.. just leave wit it. she will cool off

Is either you didn't read his response that bears similar assumption as yours or you made the above statement just to be noticed. @ op, it comes a time when a man must be assertive. Nothing is wrong with being soft and level headed, but in a critical moment just like this, i will tell you what; send her packing, take custody of your kid, if and only when she shows how remorseful she is, don't take her back. My elder brother suffered nagging and insultive issue from his wife after her first baby and he did exactly what i advised you above. Don't beat her, don't join words with her, just butt her out and she realised the gravity of her mistakes, and if after sometime you failed to see those changes you anticipated, extend her serbatical leave, i tell you, her head go clear.

Look dude ...I must say there's hardly anything u can do about dis except prayer...some ladies are not just good with their husband's parents....its upbringing nd selfishness...its inborn.....u ddnt see this b4 cos ur marriage started with "OGA I DON GET BELLE"...so there was no long courtship nd bonding with ur parents nd family....look my advice is dis...since u said the fight start once ur parents come into the picture.....its either u divorce her if u want ur parents in ur life nd ur home....or u let ur peeps stay away...if u love ur wife dat much.....I'm telling u from ma brother's experience..it might get worse oooo....wetin happen to my brother no go happen to U ooooooo........some ladies just like it as "me nd my husband nd kids only"......

soul_glo:
Sad is the fact that at least 6 other Nigerians agree with him. Imagine hitting someone so hard that they not only try to jump out of a moving vehicle but crawl under the vehicle. And he is so pleased with himself. He actually believes that she respects him now because he attacked her like a wild beast. Only in Nigeria is r4pe and brutal assault a way to prove you're a man second only to wild beasts in the jungle

apache77: .....

Lol....am not d violent kinda guy sweerie..i hav neva hit a woma before and since dat day,i hav neva hit any one either.

I dont like aggressive people either- once i notice you r d aggressibe type either in speech or behaviour i pull away.
That said a mans got to do wat a mans gotta do- not all problems hav text book solutions...and am certainly not d type to stay awake wondering wat could work and wat would not- life is too short to indulge in such

You see-my wife(girlfriend den) was very refractive, and reason was- i was too gentle in relatin wit her. Infact friends often said i was afraid of her or like my elder brother, on one of his visits once said - you are like a lamb being led to the slaughter.'

She could talk to me n wag a finger in my eye, she could tell me very rudely to leave her prescence, and did i say zhe slapped me once?

Am not given to extremes of emotions be it either extreme love or extreme anger- just in d middle so i neva ever raised my voice on her.

She thought that was all der was to me- till that fateful night- and the course of our relationship changed.

We were many chasin her then- i am not her tribe. I wasnt d richest guy chasin her den....i was d youngest..and the d dat had the least materially. Plus i was thd last guy to cum into the picture- plus i beat her...wat no one else dared do.

Yet she is married to me now and we r happy happy..i dont hav even one complain about her conduct and even till today people still say i fear my wife too much.

Did i beat her into submission? Nope. It took us months to settle dat issue but we did and everyone knew their place- my obligationz and her place in d union

She needed a hiding and i had to giv it to her. It was a manual reset and it worked n we r good. Is she waitin for her pound of flesh? Nope- she even tries harder than me to make d marriage work n once a woman puts in effort in marriage, it works moreso as she is even drawing closer n closer to God.

I see her effort and i try as much as possible to be a good husband. Have i ever shouted on her ever since den? She hardly gives me cause to and wen am.annoyed, i simply leave d house.

And wen i do, she kws shes not seein me dat night till after work the next day. So she tries very hard not to upset me and i do try to reward her good attitude by behaving myself.

A woman who does not give u any problems, ehy would you as d man become d agent the provocatuer?

Everything stated wit dat manual reset- and beating told her who d boss was..and we r good.

It worked for me- doesnt mean it will work for d next man tho

opetu:

I really dont know..but witches..ma mom bought a car for her!! my fam luvs her. dey try to relatebwitbher but she always backout. it was a wait of 8 years bfo my parents had me..its only normal for me to want them have more time with their grand kids.!! she just want me to alienate ma self from family

gbang!!!...problem identified
@ op...I guess you are the only son, and this made ur parents to overpamper you and spoil u silly making u too soft and unable to take concrete decisions thereby allowing d lady to lord over you which usually ends in kata-kata, most women are confusionists....#fact
2. You married her out of pity, which was never meant to be so..marriage is not done out of pity for someone's condition...that's a disaster awaiting to happen...moreover u said it was a one night thingy...dat was plain stoopid
3.......Emm....emm......
solution
1. Before d solution, if u attempt to prove too stubborn for her @ ds stage and she doesn't love you, abobi, you are as good as dead, she'll just poison u or find a way 2remove you from d stage thats if she doesn't kill you with HBP and constant nagging/fighting (watch nollywood bro )
Solution
sack her before she sacks you
If its really that bad/out of control.......IMDHPO(in my divine heavenly prophetic opinion)