davidif:

my man 2 slick, thank you o jare.

That is sooooooooo true rather than going to some cabin in the middle of nowhere to be alone or going to picnic in the woods because that's there version of a romantic get away. Later when avalanche happen or serial killer catch them them go dey cry.

Oh shut up dia. You just mad cuz you cheap.

what on this planet earth im i doing wt flowers ?  its better i don't receive any gift atall  @topic

Flowers for kini?
I tot we got over this. . . . . Ok, you can put the flower on top of the Lexus you bought as a gift

you guys are too funny . i think the bottom line is love.  ladies, if you know he loves you and he's just not a flower-giving kind of guy, then love him back. if he likes giving you flowers and doesn't love you, then what? u prefer flowers to love?  i believe there are many other ways a man can show you he loves you--it may not be chocolate, it may not be flowers, it may not be any of these romantic gestures portrayed in films.   u have to remember your upbringing has a major impact on who you become in your adult life. i think a lot of our parents, while growing up in nigeria, had more pressing issues they were facing than "where can i buy Iya Tope flowers?" or "is Baba Tope going to bring me flowers today?"--at least for those of us that our parents were not very well to do.  Our mothers were more likely thinking "Se oko mi ma ri owo ra efo tete wale tabi ewedu, ka ti e le ri nkan je?"  If my man wants to give me flowers, I'll definitely show appreciation. If my man is not a flower-giver, well, all i want is some lovin'!

When a Nigerian man gives you a single rose, he's one of the two things.
He's either BROKE or ROMANTIC.
Now knowing naija guys the way I do, if he's trying to be romantic, I prefer just one.
You don't need the other 11 for anything 'abi na flower man go chop?'

davidif:

@sistawoman
we love our women, because we don't take them to the moon does not mean we don't know how to take care of them. When it comes to being there in the long haul, no matter what " in sickness and in health, in happiness and in sadness" and the whole 9 yards we are always down for that, we don't just wake up in the morning and say well we need to talk. Well its not working, i think we have grown apart in the past couple of years "and its my fault" so i think we need to seperate(or take time off like they like to say it), days later, the wife or girlfriend is in the club shamelessly flirting with any boy she sees in sight. Nonsense, after all the flowers and the chocolate and the jewelry and because of some lack of "emotional connection" you break a holy sacred convenant.
That right there is why relationships should never be about emotions. At least African men are real, they are not going to buy flowers for you on monday and break up with you on sunday. In some cases, they even break up with you during dinner (yes o, dinner, can you imagine that).

We'd rather be broken up with then have a man bring in a "junior wife" so spare us the dribble.

KarmaMod:

We'd rather be broken up with then have a man bring in a "junior wife" so spare us the dribble.

Be fair, how many educated Nigerian men do you see having more than one wife?_{they are most likely cheating but not bringing home "iyawo kekere"}  And for those that choose a "junior wife", how do you call them out? with the Bible or the Quran?  I am not for a polygamous home because I think the man is indirectly requesting untimely death--the effects of having two or more wives.  I also do not agree with divorce unless your life is in danger.  Marriage, to me, is a "holy sacred convenant" and I want to do my possible best to keep my convenant with God.  To each his own.  But may the Lord be our guide and give us everlasting joy in our marriages. 

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaahahaha,its not only Nigerian men oo!!
Nigerian men r kindda lyk immitating the 'western world' . . . lol

When a Nigerian man gives you a single rose, he's one of the two things.
He's either BROKE or ROMANTIC.
Now knowing naija guys the way I do, if he's trying to be romantic, I prefer just one.
You don't need the other 11 for anything 'abi na flower man go chop?'

You are too funny!!! I don't know that many Nigerian women that likes flowers though. It's too much work trying to keep the flowers alive anyhow. Being female myself, I'm not too keen on flowers but if you're going to get me flowers, then I think I'd prefer a bunch of roses and not a single rose.

flowers?
wetin she go carry the flower do

@rubypearl

Hheheheh so flowers cause divorces?
hahahha, oh lawwd, have mercy!!

I never said that flower causes divorce, i just said its that absurd mentality of basing your relationships on aesthetic or material things that appease to your senses or worst of all your emotions, that's what causes divorce. Look at Puff, wasn't he buying J.Lo, jewelry's and flower's all the time "to keep it fresh" lol, we all know how that ended or what of Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston probably the most famous couple ever, Brad Pitt could have taken J. Aniston to the moon if he could. They had get away island resorts which they spent for themselves, mansions just to get away from life and be alone, they seemed to forgot that hanging out with friends and not yourselves only is also good for a healthy relationship. You all know what happened in the end.

Another bad part of relationships is basing it on emotions, remember, like i said, that in a relationship there are ups and downs, bright spells and dry spells (this may be long periods of times) but you work through it and focus on the good parts. If you always want your man to be taking you to an italian restaurant every week, or take you ball room dancing, then fine, but don't be yelling at him at age 40 and blame it on menopause he he he.

Relationships like i said, should not be based on unnecessary material things.

@onyinye
Only naija man would stay with you even when you blow up and become out of shape after 2 kids. He is not going to divorce you when you are 50 and tell you "well its just not working", "maybe we should just give it time", "i think there is something missing here" or the most infamous line ever "its my fault", nonsense. Heck, its only naija men that would see a woman wearing skimpy and tight outfit and complain (at least the men where i grew up). I remember in some churches, the usher might not even let a lady into the church for dressing inappropriately (slutty), how many western men do that, they would rather oogle (hmm hmm hmm, look at shawty right there) or look for ways to watch "scope" them with those short shorts. So if onyinye, if you want to marry a guy who demands that you dress like a nurse or a french maid while wearing your high heels during sex or even tell you to spank him, well be my guest, but if you want to marry mr. naija, who would take care of you and the kids laugh with you, even cook for you and not order pizza then fine. I know a lot ( and i mean a lot) of naija relationships, where husband has probably never giving the wife flowers but they are still together and absolutely in love. Because they don't take cruises to the bahamas in the summer or the husband does not put rose petals on the floor leading to the bedroom (heck, some even turn off the lights and light up candles, even when NEPA is working: let's hope she no be "ogbanje" ) does not mean they do not truly cherish each other from the bottom of there heart. I don't know whether you've had a bad history with naija men but not all of them take junior wives or have an affair on the side. Like my man said earlier, in africa, we have our own way of being romantic, and kissing in public is not one of them.

I want to marry a real woman and not some girl who wants to teddy bears, chocolate (what are you? 12 or something!!!, remember chocolate is not good for your teeth ) or who cries all the time while watching "the notebook" or "Titanic" (you see why naija men go back to naija to go find wife) or even cries over anything sef or the worst of all who wants puppies (boy do i hate pets, especially dogs; they poop everywhere and smell), if you want a dog go and buy some useful ones like "whiskey", "tiger" or even "rambo" (common dog names in naija) who can protect against armed robbers and thieves.

well I know a Nigerian guy who would give me flowers , and more if he could get to me!!!

davidif:


Only naija man would stay with you even when you blow up and become out of shape after 2 kids.

Yea he will stay with you while patrolling university campuses/secondary schools looking for the tart to pick up that might even be the same age as his daughter.

@karmamod
I don't know whether all the men in your life were like that but not all men are like that.

First off You are a slowpoke for trying to make this personal.

If you like keep being in denial about the increase of aristo activities on Nigerian campuses, or are you not aware that these men that are roam around there picking up little girls actually have wives at home.

no one said that all Naija men are like that but to make some lame comment saying "Only Naija men wont leave a woman blah blah", do you know how many men have legft women just for stupid reasons like not having a son? Going after little girls because the wife suddenly has "stretch marks" or because after child birth she's not as "tight" as she used to be

Simply go to the Health or Family section and see women in distress, asking for advice all over because they're husbands are suddenly acting up because after 4 months the wife isnt pregnant or because she has had 2 daughters so far, various ways to make herself tight again because she's seeing random texts on his phone from other women. It's all there for you and anyone to see so please quit trying to fool others if you have a problem with the truth

davidif:

@onyinye
Only naija man would stay with you even when you blow up and become out of shape after 2 kids. He is not going to divorce you when you are 50 and tell you "well its just not working", "maybe we should just give it time", "i think there is something missing here" or the most infamous line ever "its my fault", nonsense. Heck, its only naija men that would see a woman wearing skimpy and tight outfit and complain (at least the men where i grew up). I remember in some churches, the usher might not even let a lady into the church for dressing inappropriately (slutty), how many western men do that, they would rather oogle (hmm hmm hmm, look at shawty right there) or look for ways to watch "scope" them with those short shorts. So if onyinye, if you want to marry a guy who demands that you dress like a nurse or a french maid while wearing your high heels during sex or even tell you to spank him, well be my guest, but if you want to marry mr. naija, who would take care of you and the kids laugh with you, even cook for you and not order pizza then fine. I know a lot ( and i mean a lot) of naija relationships, where husband has probably never giving the wife flowers but they are still together and absolutely in love. Because they don't take cruises to the bahamas in the summer or the husband does not put rose petals on the floor leading to the bedroom (heck, some even turn off the lights and light up candles, even when NEPA is working: let's hope she no be "ogbanje" ) does not mean they do not truly cherish each other from the bottom of there heart. I don't know whether you've had a bad history with naija men but not all of them take junior wives or have an affair on the side. Like my man said earlier, in africa, we have our own way of being romantic, and kissing in public is not one of them.

I want to marry a real woman and not some girl who wants to teddy bears, chocolate (what are you? 12 or something!!!, remember chocolate is not good for your teeth ) or who cries all the time while watching "the notebook" or "Titanic" (you see why naija men go back to naija to go find wife) or even cries over anything sef or the worst of all who wants puppies (boy do i hate pets, especially dogs; they poop everywhere and smell), if you want a dog go and buy some useful ones like "whiskey", "tiger" or even "rambo" (common dog names in naija) who can protect against armed robbers and thieves.

First off i do have a dog in Nigeria named "tiger" so just wanted to point that out. Oka what is wrong about crying when you watch Titanic and The Notebook?? Does are two very romantic, very emotional movies so expect some tears to flow. If you think that is childish of me, then you have some growing up to do. Oka the whole divorce thing with the "getting out of shape" is just plain taboo. I barely know any couples who break up for such things. Anyways you talk big game as "naija men are romantic in their own way" when you failed to give on example of this. Till then im enjoying my teddy bears from Valentine's Day and my chocolates.

apparently in his mind a person is romantic when they dont ask for a divorce, but instead has the "decency" to cheat behind your back

@mrs karmamod
I know New Yorkers are supposed to be rude and obnoxious but stop with the rudeness and the insult. By the way, its you that is taking things so personal.

davidif:

@rubypearl
I never said that flower causes divorce, i just said its that absurd mentality of basing your relationships on aesthetic or material things that appease to your senses or worst of all your emotions, that's what causes divorce. Look at Puff, wasn't he buying J.Lo, jewelry's and flower's all the time "to keep it fresh" lol, we all know how that ended or what of Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston probably the most famous couple ever, Brad Pitt could have taken J. Aniston to the moon if he could. They had get away island resorts which they spent for themselves, mansions just to get away from life and be alone, they seemed to forgot that hanging out with friends and not yourselves only is also good for a healthy relationship. You all know what happened in the end.

Another bad part of relationships is basing it on emotions, remember, like i said, that in a relationship there are ups and downs, bright spells and dry spells (this may be long periods of times) but you work through it and focus on the good parts. If you always want your man to be taking you to an italian restaurant every week, or take you ball room dancing, then fine, but don't be yelling at him at age 40 and blame it on menopause he he he.

Relationships like i said, should not be based on unnecessary material things.

All this for me? ~tears in my eyes~

David, im still waiting for you to give us both an example of "[i]nigerian men are romantic in their own way" [/i]Since you talk big game, play hard.

davidif:

@mrs karmamod
I know New Yorkers are supposed to be rude and obnoxious but stop with the rudeness and the insult. By the way, its you that is taking things so personal.

What kind of NYer would I be if I stopped? Focus on the post and stop making excuses. I wouldnt have insulted you if you didnt try to make this about me. That shouldnt be hard for you to understand. Tit for tat.

answer oyinye's question as well and quit using celebrity divorces as examples.

@karmamod

First off You are a slowpoke for trying to make this personal

First off, you don't call people imbeciles, especially people you don't know. Try to have class and behave in a civil manner.

@rubypearl

All this for me? ~tears in my eyes~

You are funny  ha ha.

@onyinye
All i meant was that women shouldn't let themselves be moved by aesthetical or material things like flowers and you could just be romantic by saying something as simple as i love you or laughing with them heck, even a stroll or hanging out could be romantic. The thing is that we have watched so many movies and adopted western lifestyles that we see our ways as backward. Before the westerner came to our country, or way before we ever went there, we never knew about the concepts of flowers, still everything was alright. We didn't even have university campuses back in the day for men to patrol to look for "young replacements" (and only wealthy people in the society married more than one wife) for there wives. To conclude my sister, the bottom line is LOVE, besides that nothing else matters. Heck, i can buy you flowers just because i want your "cookies" but after that i am gone. Some people don't even say i love even after a year of sleeping together, buying flowers, and watching movies together because they are scared of the "L" word.

By the way, you guys read waaaay too many steamy cassanova novels at Barnes and Nobles 

oh please, . . . . Na only d men?? Which Nigerian lady go accept flower without cash or something extra attached to it?
Just give it to her, she go ask u wether na "flower" she go chop! lol, ( minus me sha )

Sometimes u pay as much as $65 for roses and flowers. Abeg, my question is after I give u flowers and roses, will you use it to cook nice vegetable stew? Because my $65 flowers or roses will die soon and u will throw away. Please I will buy something else that is long lasting.

besides flowers what will he send on my birthday,valentines and mothers day
waterleaf or "Awolowo" leaves?

_{yes there's something called awolowo leaves}

justin04:

Sometimes u pay as much as $65 for roses and flowers. Abeg, my question is after I give u flowers and roses, will you use it to cook nice vegetable stew? Because my $65 flowers or roses will die soon and u will throw away. Please I will buy something else that is long lasting.

Nella:

oh please, . . . . Na only d men?? Which Nigerian lady go accept flower without cash or something extra attached to it?
Just give it to her, she go ask u wether na "flower" she go chop! lol, ( minus me sha )

Thank U o jare!!!! Flower ko, Flour ni

Uche2nna:

Thank You o jare!!!! Flower ko, Flour ni

Uche you better have 1-800-flowers on speed dial.
I'm trying to save you a lifetime of naggings

Uche2nna:

Thank You o jare!!!! Flower ko, Flour ni

Shaarup dia you dey cheap

Queenisha:

Uche you better have 1-800-flowers on speed dial.
I'm trying to save you a lifetime of naggings

Nagging? Silent treatment is always a good remedy for that.

Nella:

oh please, . . . . Na only d men?? Which Nigerian lady go accept flower without cash or something extra attached to it?
Just give it to her, she go ask u wether na "flower" she go chop! lol, ( minus me sha )

You don't have to buy a bouquet of exotic flowers.
If you live here in the USA,a small bundle of roses at Publix or kroger will do

you can even find very cheap deals at train stations or from roadside Mexican hawkers
how will she know?

Queenisha:

You don't have to buy a bouquet of exotic flowers.
If you live here in the USA,a small bundle of roses at Publix or kroger will do

you can even find very cheap deals at train stations or from roadside Mexican hawkers
how will she know?

Uhmmm. . . . . Queen do you live in the south of USA?? just a question.

onyinye2:

Shaarup dia you dey cheap

lol

Hope U are not planning to marry an Igbo guy with that mentality.   Flowers? Girl, please!!!!