[quote author=gunners160]Huh it all depend on the both couples.thisdays,most people go into marriages with the sole aim of jst getting a child and that's all.sori to say, religion to also has a role in this boringness they tel couples dnt do this, dnt do dat, dnt date a guy/lady jst pray and your partner wil fall 4rm heaven.to make matter worst some religion tels you how to Bleep your wife and hw she wil dress anythng outside pastor style is a sin. gosh! 2rndly, some men are just so egocentric they misinterpret the meaning of a "weaker vessel".they see it has some1 who has no say,who is weak and has nuthng to offer and this is wrong.3rdly,lack of initiative.the man continues doing dsame thng everyday. the woman too continues doing dsame thng everyday the both couples dnt try to bring in new ideas,new initiative etc go to work cum bck and thats all.no new things to introduce to the marriage or make the other partner eager to see.lastly,people see dating as jst 4 kids and after marriage dating is over.hel no,dating is a continous process and thats why most couples today prefer when they are dating than when they are married.couples should continue dating and this wil reduce the high rate of divorce. this points above are the main causes of boredom in marriages until this issues are addressed it wil continue [tru talk]

mindworx:

Very good points in bold, but its both parties, not 'especially women'. When was the last time he woke her up with a kiss or carried her from the living room to the bed.

Why I said women especially is most times they forget first and always.... A girl that normally rocks bump shots at home ordinarily, gets married and starts adorning wrapper carelessly in the house, leaves boobs roaming on the floor... #Am not anti-women, am a woman.

Op why do I feel you are the constant among the 3couples visisted. The fun in marriage is created differently from when one was single.

Tell me as a single does your kids see you as barney( a giant play-thing), tired eating your hair or licking you as though you are one big chocolate.

Do you understand gossip is only legal between husband and wife, dorging kids and looking for any thin opportunity to be hump your partner, or praying they all sleep simultaneously.

Do you know how comforting it is to know that there is that one person that will witness every of you and support you for the rest of your life.

*If there is one thing that marriage isn't, that is borin ; new things pop up everyday except those you visisted don't have kids yet.

And I am sorry they didn't take you to the cinema on a weekday or to the club because they have to prepare for work/kids for school in the morning.

Op marriage isn't self-ish (about me) but Us-ish( about we).

Yungwizzzy: If he has money it won't be boring at all!!

None of my girlfriends have ever complained of any boredom

Because of my seven digit account balance!!

Yes ooo"..

Some people are naturally quiet and homely, and they love their lives that way. Infact, I've seen people who detest eating outside, and running around restaurants in town.

If you find their marriages boring, and yours "lively"; will that make your marriage better? na wa! Only you na observer, only you na lawyer, only you na judge.

Do not be surprised oo, the same fun you seek passionately can end your marriage in 1minute.

Biko, I beg you, allow people live their lives the way they want.

Someone commented about having things in common and I believe that's the key to an interesting marriage. The only thing that makes you fall inlove over and over again is stuff that interests you both

See what love can do to a lady

http://www.dsuperwoman.com/2014/05/what-emotions-can-make-you-do.html?m=1

listen! listeeeen! if being in a peaceful and nurturing coexistence where u both care and look out for one another is boring to you, you'll never ever be happy.

if u want excitement go to a wizkid show. i dont know what is wrong with this young adult of nowadays, the go to church...its boring, visit relative...its boring, t.v is on cnn..its boring. this hedonism is common amongst girls , life is not a big party, every activity is not supposed to be about fun. and the end result, you'll never appreciate how good u really have it.

I think part of the problem is also the Nigerian cultural factor. There are so many rules on what a married woman should and should not do. So you'll find out that a couple that used to go dancing before will no longer do so because they'll say a married woman isn't supposed to go to a club. Even though as a married couple obviously responsibilities are more and you'll go out less but there's nothing wrong with going dancing like once a month with your spouse.
Also Nigerian women carry religion for head! To go out for drinks is a problem because they don't want their Church people to see them in such a place. Go out and have date nights even if it's just non-alcoholic cocktails. Even with sex they think there are some things they should no longer do as married women. A woman who used to give her boyfriend b jobs while dating will stop doing so after married, instead of having sex in different places in the house like before it become a bedroom only act! Now the funny part is the husband will carry young girls to go for drinks and such while she is home forming good wife.

One thing I have noticed is that the Nigeian couples that live in other Countries tend to have a more exciting marriage. My married friends outside Nigeria have the kids go for a sleepover once a month. They do dancing, have drinks, get back home and have sex on the kitchen counter top. That is the way things should be, I know couples even in their 50s who do this. Sometimes they go on holidays alone for a few days and arrange for the grandparents to stay with the kids.

Because na old school type of marriage most nowadays couples still dey do, which has form a norm and a routine in their everyday living e.g papa wiil go to work in the morning, mama will look after the home in the day and at night papa go brush mama bush.
yeah this topic made sense, marriage can become very boring if there is no genuine attraction, love and adventures in the relationship that spices up the marriage.

Yeah it can become boring if you entered into the union for procreation reasons
2..if you Dont love the man or woman genuinely before marriage.
3. You married out of sentiment or pity or for fame, name, or money
4. No contentment. No communication or no togetherness. There are so many factors that can make marriage become boring. Marriage is a wonderful institution, it is the couples involved that can make it sometimes to become boring.

one or da two of em get lover fo outside.

Hexzyz: The reason is people don't depend on God for his perfect will in marriage. They go by what they see. God knows the heart of every individual and who is perfect for each other.

idiat.

shoefreak: Abi. It's just easy to blame the widening space on the kids. Thts just wrong.

Bunmi, how far

Do they have kids? Do they have stable means of income? maybe they live in rented apartments and the rent is due, but they are having challenge raising the funds? the children are due to return turn to school and they needed to raise the school fees? This and many such problems weight in on couples mind/lives and this can make the marriage to seem to be boring.
They could be active and fun-filled once in a while. IT CAN BE FUN ALL THE TIME

Bigcake: Op, ntokeyen ema etonghor ukung itid at a very tender age, afor akere abo ke itid abi badie ke ema edor ndor? Ana itid asiagha mmong nangha. But the best way out is to take ur wife as ur friend.

Bigcake! Afo day ata idiok ntokeyen. Sai! Afo may biada abogo. Mbok dont spoil me oh! Lmao!

adanduka: Because the couples in those marriages were not friends before marriage.

guy y are u talking like dis tins change especially wen there is kids or at times financial setbacks.dis are few of dem that make marriage boring

tatiana009: I think part of the problem is also the Nigerian cultural factor. There are so many rules on what a married woman should and should not do. So you'll find out that a couple that used to go dancing before will no longer do so because they'll say a married woman isn't supposed to go to a club. Even though as a married couple obviously responsibilities are more and you'll go out less but there's nothing wrong with going dancing like once a month with your spouse.
Also Nigerian women carry religion for head! To go out for drinks is a problem because they don't want their Church people to see them in such a place. Go out and have date nights even if it's just non-alcoholic cocktails. Even with sex they think there are some things they should no longer do as married women. A woman who used to give her boyfriend b jobs while dating will stop doing so after married, instead of having sex in different places in the house like before it become a bedroom only act! Now the funny part is the husband will carry young girls to go for drinks and such while she is home forming good wife.

One thing I have noticed is that the Nigeian couples that live in other Countries tend to have a more exciting marriage. My married friends outside Nigeria have the kids go for a sleepover once a month. They do dancing, have drinks, get back home and have sex on the kitchen counter top. That is the way things should be, I know couples even in their 50s who do this. Sometimes they go on holidays alone for a few days and arrange for the grandparents to stay with the kids.

Says tatiana009

Acidosis:

Says tatiana009

Yes says moi, I have no problem with couples who are naturally home buddies and they stay home together but what I have noticed is that in most Nigerian homes that isn't so. The husbands ends up going to seek the fun outside which defeats the purpose of marriage.
In a case where one person prefers staying at home and the other going out then a compromise should be reached. Stay home some weekends and go out some. Even if you stay home you can still make thing fun, have the kids go to their grand parents, watch a movie with your partner and cap the night with amazing sex where you can scream the house down lol

What we usually have here is a case where the wife goes for all the Church programmes known to man while the husband goes to all the clubs. How won't cheating enter the equation?

@op...see u,u tink marriage is boy frnd/galfrnd.....wait until u grow up may be then u wil get 2knw why.

shoefreak: Hahaha. Shey I lie ni? They forget na! Maybe overcome by other challenges but isn't it the same job and the same persons? With the kids it should even be much more fun!!

They go tap, tap on their phones in each other's presence. Hian!!! I will throw that phone inside water ni!!! or, you just chat with her/him if he seem engrossed.

"Hey handsome! I'm Kristin."
**he'll be look up from d phone and be like...'are you high'

"You looking all cute like glazed strawberry and I wanna lick you..." and d kids will be like...why r our parents looking all funny with d giggles...

The convo go start then faa... common! spice the thing up jare!

God bless ya moda! Na ppl like u way I want yan with. Its nice to meet someone who wants to spice up her marriage. No be all dis ppl way day use family responsibilities as excuse to be boring.

These days people marry for money, some for luxury and forgeting the force dat bind marriages 2gether. Marriage is not just abt love only , its about friendship. I always tell people MARRY YOUR FRIEND.

tatiana009:

Yes says moi, I have no problem with couple who are naturally home buddies but what I have noticed is that in most Nigerian homes that isn't so. The husbands ends up going to seek for the fun outside which defeats te purpose of marriage.

I get the point

I noticed d same thing but, if d spouse(s) is/are originally boring people d boredom bcoms elevated.

emueze: These days people marry for money, some for luxury and forgeting the force dat bind marriages 2gether. Marriage is not just abt love only , its about friendship. I always tell people MARRY YOUR FRIEND.

You mean the FRIENDZONED GUY?

Ladies do not LOVE their friends (romantically). They prefer that strange guy that triggers the butterfly in their bellies

Tattooboy: Well i have noticed dat too. Dat's y im not gonna marry because im in love with someone but because we have alot of tins in common.

That is very correct. When you marry someone who likes what you like,eg sports,politics,current affairs,science etc. Though,it is not the only criteria for excitement in marriage;it helps to reduce distance.

yemfash: Hum what u said is rigth am tried of my marriage. because is so boring

If u wot u say is true, den u can get tips from some of d comments here on how to spice up your marriage.

Chineke!!!! Tunde, what's up? That thing do you something oo **checks time** Jesus is Lord.

olubukato:

Bunmi, how far

Exactly! When the butterflies begin die, na then the yawa go begin surface!!

suffocated butterflies. People still dey marry unto butterfly matter? What's the life span of a butterfly sef?

Acidosis:

You mean the FRIENDZONED GUY?

Ladies do not LOVE their friends (romantically). They prefer that strange guy that triggers the butterfly in their bellies

obongproff:
God bless ya moda! Na ppl like u way I want yan with. Its nice to meet someone who wants to spice up her marriage. No be all dis ppl way day use family responsibilities as excuse to be boring.

Abi na. Whc kain family responsibilities? Being responsible doesn't equate being boring. If he is a busy man, send him yumm, raunchy text. Other things to make him look forward to coming home with the hope that something unexpected is waiting for him.

And guys, don't leave it all on the woman. Be a lil spontaneous. Ten minutes out of sending out that email proposal won't kill ya! Hehehe... wear a thong for her... dance in it... give her a lap dance. be naughty!!!!

And financial setback doesn't make marriage boring. Come on!! A walk hand in hand under the moonlight wit the kid on his shoulder costs how much? A game of draft by all of them costs? Washing the car together like you are in a movie costs?

Because, either of the couple is intellectually re-tarded.
Majority of Nigerian couples (even millions who went to school) are intellectually re-tarded.

Marriage actually begins when love ends...

If you don't marry, how does it affect me ?

People create the lives they want to live..

If you are fun being with as a single, so it continues after marriage.

If you are selfish as a single, so it continues after marriage.

So e no go pass me this year..

shoefreak: Exactly! When the butterflies begin die, na then the yawa go begin surface!!

suffocated butterflies. People still dey marry unto butterfly matter? What's the life span of a butterfly sef?

I believe couples must (mutually) map out romantic continuity plans.

This "sophisticated love" does not last, more reason why people move on easily after break-ups.
The Life span of butterfly is dependent on the breed o, some days - up to a year


So after 1 baby, its normal for a sophisticated love to die:

proevan: Op why do I feel you are the constant among the 3couples visisted. The fun in marriage is created differently from when one was single.

Tell me as a single does your kids see you as barney( a giant play-thing), tired eating your hair or licking you as though you are one big chocolate.

Do you understand gossip is only legal between husband and wife, dorging kids and looking for any thin opportunity to be hump your partner, or praying they all sleep simultaneously.

Do you know how comforting it is to know that there is that one person that will witness every of you and support you for the rest of your life.

*If there is one thing that marriage isn't, that is borin ; new things pop up everyday except those you visisted don't have kids yet.

And I am sorry they didn't take you to the cinema on a weekday or to the club because they have to prepare for work/kids for school in the morning.

Op marriage isn't self-ish (about me) but Us-ish( about we).

Dude. U are so wrong. Its not abt d activities, its not abt taking me out. Its abt d mentality.

When we were in high school, we had two maths teachers, one was boring and d oda was exciting. It was d same subject but different delivery.

Like I sed earlier, it takes two boring people to make a boring marriage.