kennygee: The biggest problem with communication is that we don't listen to understand, we listen to reply.

hmmmm, i've learnt something - listen to understand, not to reply

may you long and be happy

BookMARKED

Is this a story or tips for better communication skills?

How did this reach front page?

Nairaland mods

I will be right back.

TheBigUrban2: How did this reach front page?

Nairaland mods

#Following

Esther's supposedly surprise meal now comes @ a wrong time...........I fink

kennygee: The biggest problem with communication is that we don't listen to understand, we listen to reply.

Nice one

The story no get end??

temitopegee: The story no get end??

How would you like it to end?

**in Badoo voice*** story yi tife ma long ju

Good communicaton skills in the write up..

Hmm.. I just hope its not one of those demonic stories created by feminist to demonise all men and paint women as harmless angels that could not hurt a fly.

Just remember one thing, as you seek to paint men as black devils, some of these "terible men" are your father, brothers, sons, cousins, uncles, and other relatives.

numericalguy: Good communicaton skills in the write up..

Hmm.. I just hope its not one of those demonic stories created by feminist to demonise all men and paint women as harmless angels that could not hurt a fly.

Just remember one thing, as you seek to paint men as black devils, some of these "terible men" are your father, brothers, sons, cousins, uncles, and other relatives.

you know very well that it is not but look at all u just said, does it make sense? U should have asked the question and left it at that.
Guys say alot of bad things about women too but nobody is saying they have sisters and mothers.
The lesson here is how to work on your communication skills, the man can also play the part the woman (Esther) played, it doesnt have to be the woman alone, depends on who's in the crazy mood.

Some pple has oreadi finished d story in their mind o...........See Xplanation Abeg**

Another tip could be: instead of using a negative word in communication, negate a positive word.

Eg:
Instead of saying: I HATE eating egwusi without plenty vegetables.
Say: I DON'T LIKE eating egwusi without plenty vegetables.

Also instead of: This house is too DIRTY
Say: This house is not so TIDY

Great! As you pointed out, the action could swing in any direction and the response would vary to suit each scenario.

knowing when 2 talk or not is d best idea
right time,right point and right place

Tinkybabe: Nice one!

It was also obvious that the behaviour was not typical of Kunle. His bad day triggered that action which his wife understood perfectly, his response to his wife's query proves it.

Let me introduce a twist to your story
After Esther asked if he had a bad day,his response, " what silly question are you asking me?I just complained about the house being messy and you're asking me a silly question. "
"But honey, I'm just concerned about you" replied Esther quietly but the harsh "save it for yourself!" she got from her husband sent a cold shiver down her spine.

In this instance, silence is best whilst he's left alone to be by himself ..The wife could then approach him later to ask what the problem is/was?

Patience is the engine oil of effective communication.

Op, nice tips and example by the way

60million likes.. U'd mk a gud wife.Lol. Hpy sunday

captcochrane:

hmmmm, i've learnt something - listen to understand, not to reply

may you long and be happy

You are very welcomed.

Tinkybabe: Nice one!

It was also obvious that the behaviour was not typical of Kunle. His bad day triggered that action which his wife understood perfectly, his response to his wife's query proves it.

Let me introduce a twist to your story
After Esther asked if he had a bad day,his response, " what silly question are you asking me?I just complained about the house being messy and you're asking me a silly question. "
"But honey, I'm just concerned about you" replied Esther quietly but the harsh "save it for yourself!" she got from her husband sent a cold shiver down her spine.

In this instance, silence is best whilst he's left alone to be by himself ..The wife could then approach him later to ask what the problem is/was?

Patience is the engine oil of effective communication.

Op, nice tips and example by the way

@ the bolded

Thanks for catching that. Those who think I'm man bashing, I am not. It is a true story. The names have been changed. That's all. The mans behavior was not typical. Esther knew something was wrong. I could also give examples where Kunle was the one to defuse a situation.


Because Esther and Kunle think of the others feelings first, they are able to understand when the other has an off day. They don't think in terms of "me". They think in terms of "us".

I challenge anyone who is struggling in their relationship to start thinking of your partner first. Do at least one thing to make them happy everyday for 30 days. Watch what happens. It will surprise you.

Some may think this strategy is one sided, but somebody has to start. It won't even take the whole month before you see results from the other party.

If you start making your partner happy, they will want to do the same.

#IN A TYPICAL HAUSA MAN's voice# I ZEY FOLLOW

Ok it's 4am here. I happened to wake up and decided to check the thread. I've got to get some sleep. If you address me and I don't reply, it's because I'm snoring.


Laterz
zzz

OkikiOluwa1:
The day I learned that you don't v to talk too much but listen more, my life has improved.

Errrhm but what happens if we are all listening and not talking too much...who does the talking then? just asking

texanomaly: What has worked for you. How do you defuse a situation? What strategies have you used during and argument? Do you have any tips to helps us with our communication?

I once saw an hilarious post where girls were asked to start rubbing their boobs in front of an angry bf...that d guy wld calm down asap...

I jus hpe im nt derailing this thread.

I broke up 5 wks ago. Really, i love dis particular gal, bt she touched da tail of a crocodile- she made me angry. This made me to type a break-up epistle wic i send 2 her. The content of d msg i send was jus nt alrite cos i was damn angry. She tried subtle ways to win me bck bt anger cudnt let me relate.

Realise lately that "you can neva run away frm dat loving gal u ar loving". Bt d problem is dat i went to far. Bt i stil love her. We chat tho, i stil cal her. Bt i doubt if she stil belive me.

THE QUESTION IS

What communicative skills wud i use to gt her bck?

kennygee: The biggest problem with communication is that we don't listen to understand, we listen to reply.

Ma'am, this means a lot to me. Thank you.
I wish some people will read between the lines.

I go with the hand-holding and thigh-touching scenario, it can be very effective to some whose mental gadgets are still intact.

But otherwise, I just ask them to place their tender lips on my posterior and kiss it repeatedly.

[color=#006600][/color]

kennygee: The biggest problem with communication is that we don't listen to understand, we listen to reply.

Very short and on point....off to church