Hmmm OP, u just took the word out of my mouth,a few days ago I asked my man that question? And he was just beating around d bush just like one of the readers said trying to use soup to make his point, but my dear cheating is cheating and u can't love sumone and still cheat on he/her even ontop the cheating he still send a text telling her he loves her and at d same time he tells me he loves me and he can't do without me. But I made it clear to him tat he should not forget tat wat is good for d goose is also good for d gander, tat he should remember tat wat u don't want sumbody to do to you u shouldn't do it to others.

zboyd: Some people aren't ready to end a relationship/marriage when they cheat.

In fact, many BFs/GFs/Spouses who are caught cheating actually never intended to break up or get a divorce. This is very confusing and frustrating, for the betrayed ones who are living in this situation. They often hear things like "I swear I never stopped loving you." "My cheating has nothing to do with you or our relationship or marriage." "It has nothing to do with my feelings for you."

How are betrayed BFs/GFs/Spouses supposed to believe this?

What is love anyway?

How can you claim to still love someone during and after you cheat on them?

Is it possible?

Is it possible that cheating can actually strengthen a relationship/marriage, reveal the reasons why a BF/GF/Spouse cheated, find ways to curtail future cheating, as well as help you understand yourself much more intimately?

Reference: marriagepartners.com

Just to make correction on an obvious mistake cos i'm so allergic to bad English, that your title is not correct. You used "someone" in the initial sentence but resorted to "they" in the latter one. The two cant work in such way in same statement. Please effect necessary corrections asap. Thank you.

Meanwhile, good morning all especially to mzmariah. Where is she please?

Fine! Agreed! Its possible to cheat and still be in love with someone. You probably cheated cause who you're in love with, stopped satisfying or couldn't satisfy a certain urge. And as much as you love em, you just had to satisfy the urge. Question is, will the person who was cheated on remain in love? I mean even after being told the reasons they were cheated on and all. The person who was cheated on, might remain in love and decide to improve and satisfy their partner's urge or end things. Usually mostly depends on how the two communicate and understand each other. I and my bf communicate and understand ourselves perfectly, but once I realize or confirm he's cheating- its over!

evegran: Fine! Agreed! Its possible to cheat and still be in love with someone. You probably cheated cause who you're in love with, stopped satisfying or couldn't satisfy a certain urge. And as much as you love em, you just had to satisfy the urge. Question is, will the person who was cheated on remain in love? I mean even after being told the reasons they were cheated on and all. The person who was cheated on, might remain in love and decide to improve and satisfy their partner's urge or end things. Usually mostly depends on how the two communicate and understand each other. I and my bf communicate and understand ourselves perfectly, but once I realize or confirm he's cheating- its over!

You look good

If there is one thing I have come to understand in this world, it's "FAILURE FOR MANY PEOPLE TO TAKE CHARGE OF THEIR OWN LIVES WHENEVER A PARTICULAR SITUATION THAT PRESENTS SUCH CALLS FOR IT"

U see OP, I too have pondered on this very issue many times just understand the reason why intimate partners (especially those who we deemed/know as a responsible individual) will all of a sudden cheat on their partners & still come around to profess their undying love for their mates, Gosh, u really need to witness the manner in which they do such, most are very emotional whenever it comes to this issue & this will leave u in a very confused state (B'cos we all know that someone can not lie when they look into our eyes!) It's a mystery, really it is!

It's only later on that I came to realise the disturbing truth; it's the inmost desire(and even emotions) within a human being that led way for commitment of such despicable acts, especially those desires that are left uncontrolled! That is why it is very neccessary that once u discover that u have such problem, u seek for a spiritual help immediately! This is not what a physical thing can do, it's something that has to do with someone's spirit. Believe me, I know what I am telling you. Desires & emotions are meant to be controlled & not vice versa.

donsteady:

You look good

merci

born2fuck: Love and cheating are different things entirely, most guys are guilty of cheating but kept the one they love at home.

I have cheated on several girls and even some for just a token of 5000 or lie but I kept and monitored my girlfriend, infact I put tracker for her body but girls can not be monitor

I cannot let someone cheat on me because I am a great cheate"two king can't rule the same town"

ur name nd ur post no dey lie!

A man can love you deeeeply and still cheat on you because guys see sex as pleasure but when a woman makes out with another man then she does not love you anymore because ladies are emotional beings and sex is more sacred to them.

I am not talking about sluts here or sex workers.

harmlessphil: Hmmm OP, u just took the word out of my mouth,a few days ago I asked my man that question? And he was just beating around d bush just like one of the readers said trying to use soup to make his point, but my dear cheating is cheating and u can't love sumone and still cheat on he/her even ontop the cheating he still send a text telling her he loves her and at d same time he tells me he loves me and he can't do without me. But I made it clear to him tat he should not forget tat wat is good for d goose is also good for d gander, tat he should remember tat wat u don't want sumbody to do to you u shouldn't do it to others.

And he is still your man?

NigellusHosan:
ah lol..
My thoughts exactly..
But we sha like to taste plenty soup..
Remember stolen water is sweeter.

very sweet

Computer6303:


what if after tasting the other soup, you realise its far better than vegetable huh?

then i will tell my wife to start cooking the soup

Teespice:


What utter nonsense.

People like you have no business having a relationship let alone marriage with this dumb mindset of yours.

Yet when a woman cheats, it is people like you who will be the first to say "kick her cheating self to the curbs" as well as label her with names.

he he. slow down your role darling. I was only talking about soup

ochon: SMH!! And when a lady cheats on you with all these moronic excuses, you'll never forgive her as she'd forgive you. I pray your future wife cheats on you and give you the reasons you stated and still say "I LOVE YOU" and you must accept. The way some men finds it easy to exucse their cheating prowess, makes me wonder why they can't employ such excuses and forgive a woman that cheats on them.

how do you know if I'm not married i talked about SOUP and only soup so why the attitude?

Me I don't understand o

I talk out of experience becoz woman ar more calculative when they cheat they close their tracks bt men ar just open minded of not woman cheat more than men bt u cannot easily realize it. Yes that u admire someone is not bad and dt those not mean u hat ur partner or u love the person less.

Ladybluecash: Oh yes, i can cheat on my man by avin a harmless date or hangout wit oldtym or new frnd bt avin sex is out of it. Love differs frm feelin, u myt still av feelins for anada nd still slip wit anada. Excuse me goin by d true meanin of LOVE der is no justification to dat Hohaaaa. Mak una no VEX una wey dey cheat

It usually starts from the "harmless dates". Why go on the so called harmless date in the first place. Isn't that hypocrisy? because you have already cheated emotionally.

Its your type that will later cry bucketfuls claiming it was a mistake.

Cheating has a spirit behind it. A very strong one indeed. Forget all those stories about men being polygamous in nature, I don't believe that rubbish. Everything is in the mind and it all comes down to decision making. What are you doing in social sites like badoo, two etc if you are married or into a serious relationship? ''Did i hear you say Its just for fun''? I have been there myself but you end up having heartache, guilty conscience and regrets. Whoever cheats on his/her spouse does it on purpose and hope not to be found out. I pray for God's spirit to always fight the urge to fall into this category of men.

xp17: yes, for guys. A guy could have some random sex without any string attached and still go back home with all his love, leaving non behind, but when a lady does likewise, know she's got some feelings for the fella , opssss! sorry you've lost her to the guy.

bottom line, men don't cheat, they only explore. Abraham did it,
David did it,
Solomon did it,
who am I not to? I dey craze?





hit like if you get the gist.

L L
you're a clown I swear on my dead granny

Love and cheating don't go together
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My take on this

Onegai: Men use it as an excuse: "I love my wife, my gfs outside dare not disrespect her!". It's the same deception we use as Nigerians to be going to church anyhow, yet be a nation of corrupt individuals. Lack of Discipline. However, let me give a warning to men:

Women can outdo you and cook your soup with a straight face.

I've stopped counting the cases I've heard of cheating wives. And yes, they justify it even better than the men (we women learnt from the best ). Was it the one with her ex (that's the common one, here's a hint man, when your wife "loses" her phone, it's because her fellowship/friends advised her to change it so she breaks off contact with the guy she's cheating with).
Or the lady whose husband kept saying "I love you" but cheated profusely (every uni student in the club, he would sleep with). Was it not during marriage counselling, she too said she endured his cheating for 7 yrs, but then met a young banker in her office, when they go for marketing, they would divert to a hotel after, and she would come home and make fresh stew for her cheating hubby?? See her husband crying that day.

You cannot respect me and be wanting to lick Ogbono soup outside, for a difference, you will discipline and train yourself to manage that vegetable soup. Or me too, I will tell myself "I love beef, but once in a while, sausage is nice". And I will serve you fresh soup with a very straight, prayerful, submissive face.

You are very correct. As in with "a straight face".

How can you cheat on your spouse and still be able to look him/her in the face? Such individual is more or less a murderer.

Op;

so u re saying that a whats up man thats in love with a very lazy wife (whom decided to b born again after 5yrs of marriage) like the deeper life/ Lords chosen types etc tht sees variety in the bed as a sin; that the dude should remain there abi...

Or

are u seeing that that hot babe/fine looking woman who marries one pot belly man (because of financial struggles/ forced marriage) that his tins can hardly stand for one month after one round of sex; make she stay there abi...

come on jst b realistic... U CAN LOVE UR PARTNER & STILL CHEAT simple as ABC.. ok

The golden rule is that MAKE SURE THAT THOU SHALL NOT BE CAUGHT... & USE PROTECTION

Na wah oooo. We all make mistakes. True repentance determines if love still exists in the relationship. Pls stop comparing peoples emotions with "veg/okro" soup

cheating doesn't exactly means having sex with another person. when u find yourself deleting emails, locking your phone, making a hide and seek call and trying to cover up tracks So that your partner won't See them, you've just started cheating.

xp17: yes, for guys. A guy could have some random sex without any string attached and still go back home with all his love, leaving non behind, but when a lady does likewise, know she's got some feelings for the fella , opssss! sorry you've lost her to the guy.

bottom line, men don't cheat, they only explore. Abraham did it,
David did it,
Solomon did it,
who am I not to? I dey craze?





hit like if you get the gist.

zboyd:

Not to my knowledge.

But if I find out...his azz is grass!

I don't tolerate cheating!

His azz is grass!!!... That is if he values you in the first place......

Good that you have zero tolerance for cheating.

mstik: I can believe this. At least for men. When men cheat, they are not emotionally attached to the girl they cheat with. It's just having sex , for them and they feel nothing for the person they sleep with.

i beg to disagree. The sweetness of the 5ex can even lead to emotional attachment. Have u not heard about men marrying a girl picked for just one night stand.

dorosola: cheating doesn't exactly means having sex with another person. when u find yourself deleting emails, locking your phone, making a hide and seek call and trying to cover up tracks So that your patter won't See them, you've just started cheating.

Ɣ☺ΰ̊'re so on point

bennyrazz: It is very possible to cheat and still love your partner. Let me put it like this, you like vegetable soup very much and you eat it everyday, some days will definitely come where you want to do away with vegetables for probably a day or two but you still love vegetables and you rate it ahead of any other soup. After tasting other soups, you will be like hun hun vegetable is better than this now, vegetables doesn't purge me now, vegetables doesn't make my tongue bitter now. That is when you realise you can't do away with vegetables and vegetable is better than ogbono, ewudo, okro soup, edika ikong , white soup, egusi, banga, gbegiri e.tc and when you are caught by your wife eating another soup that is when you begin to explain and make her realise that the other soup you tasted isn't as sweet as her own vegetables

I hope the women are allowed to have variety too

I wonder why people always forget the fact that God's standard stands firm, nothing whether on earth or in heaven can alter it. And God isn't a respecter of a man whether weak or strong. What Bible says concerning marriage still remains " beds are undefiled and marriage is honourable... ". Any relationship you keep that is always involved in immoralities, is not the God's plan for you. I'm not saying human is perfect o buh when It's becomes a habit considering it has a normal thing is out of it.

@ OP Love is the most bastardized word in the world. A lot of people profess love they dont mean.
The love of man is imperfect and fades,only the love of God is encompassing and last forever.
Man is not a perfect being and make mistakes. A person can really lust on people other than his/her partner without planning to. So these are reasons why people profess love and still cheat. However there is a difference between i cheated(yesterday) and i am a cheater (yesterday,today and forever).