Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? - Romance - Nairaland
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| Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Nobody: 7:26pm On Sep 25, 2014 |
I met a guy recently and he is great. He's got the kind of personality I would want in my man, he's sweet, kind , humorous and a great communicator but im not attracted to him in anyway. Apart from the fact that he's not attractive facially he is also 5ft 1 while im 5ft 7inch, in other words he is very short. Call me superficial or shallow but I cant help the things I want and Im attracted to guys I can "LOOK UP TO" both FIGURATIVELY and LITERALLY Yes i'm aware looks are not everything and no, im not extremely picky and i know we have a great connection but im not attracted to him at all despite his charming personality .... should I settle because everyone thinks im being superficial or I should go for exactly what i want? 1 Like |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Ibrowski(m): 7:45pm On Sep 25, 2014 |
The answer lies within............. SINCE YOU CAN'T LOOK UP TO HIM,YOU CAN'T BE ATTRACTED TO HIM *shikena* 2 Likes |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by 1one: 7:45pm On Sep 25, 2014 |
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| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by PDPblogger: 7:52pm On Sep 25, 2014 |
Arcasie: I met a guy recently and he is great. He's got the kind of personality I would want in my man, he's sweet, kind , humorous and a great communicator but im not attracted to him in anyway. Apart from the fact that he's not attractive facially he is also 5ft 1 while im 5ft 7inch, in other words he is very short.You will need this: NIGERIAN LESSONS FOR SINGLE LADIES. https://www.nairaland.com/1916719/coming-soon-nigerian-lessons-single |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by lirusehn(m): 8:36pm On Sep 25, 2014 |
Arcasie: I met a guy recently and he is great. He's got the kind of personality I would want in my man, he's sweet, kind , humorous and a great communicator but im not attracted to him in anyway. Apart from the fact that he's not attractive facially he is also 5ft 1 while im 5ft 7inch, in other words he is very short. stop deceiving yourself  |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Baddestguyp(m): 11:32pm On Sep 25, 2014 |
lirusehn:thank u jare. op, u like him but u don't wanna admit it, even to urself. stop fighting ur feelings and follow ur heart |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Nobody: 1:08am On Sep 26, 2014 |
Op, i understand u. Even if a guy is as cute as John Legend. As rich as Bill Gate or Dangote. As nice as the Pope of roman Catholic. Or, as prayerful as a monk in monastery. Truth is..., if you are not into him..., u are not into him. And, u can never be happy being with him. unless, if a miracle happens all of a sudden. 2 Likes |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Ucheosefoh(m): 6:26am On Sep 26, 2014 |
I use to have that kind of mind set but when I get older I know better that what we need is not always in what we want. I am six foot tall and always dream of dating tall girls but when I get older and with lots of experience in relationship I found out that their is more to everybody than physical looks now I can date short girls not dwarfs as long as I am happy with her. I think you have to look beyond physical looks and look at his personality. I think we all lay much emphasis on physical look cus of societal pressures (allowing the society to dictate our life for us) when we start feeling the heat the society will not bail us out 2 Likes |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Nobody: 7:13am On Sep 26, 2014 |
Ucheosefoh: I use to have that kind of mind set but when I get older I know better that want we need is not always in what we want. I am six foot tall and always dream of dating tall girls but when I get older and with lots of experience in relationship I found out that they is more to everybody than physical looks now I can date short girls not dwarfs as long as I am happy with her. I think you have to look beyond physical looks and look at his personality. I think we all lay much emphasis on physical look cus of societal pressures (allowing the society to dictate our life for us) when we start feeling the heat the society will bail us outI get you but ur situation is different because you are a guy ...its not so bad or as awkward seeing a tall guy with a short girl ...but mine is so awkward I never wear heels when we hang out and im even still taller without heels problem is not only his height ...there is just no attraction what so ever ....im sure u were atleast attracted a little to the short girls you dated |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Nobody: 7:17am On Sep 26, 2014 |
lirusehn: how am I deceiving myself?? I admitted that I love his personality .....my question is if its ok to date a guy solely for his personality or there shud be sm kind of attraction?? |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Nobody: 7:26am On Sep 26, 2014 |
missbronze: Op, i understand u.finally smone who really understands 1 Like |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Sarimah(f): 7:31am On Sep 26, 2014 |
U just said u aint into him so pls don't start wat u can't finish |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Nobody: 7:36am On Sep 26, 2014 |
Sarimah: U just said u aint into him so pls don't start wat u can't finishyes im not into him at all but is personality enough or attraction is needed? |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Sarimah(f): 7:44am On Sep 26, 2014 |
Arcasie:as 4 me, I can't date som1 I'm not attracted to in any way..so personality nd attraction should go 2geda |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by vincent561(m): 7:45am On Sep 26, 2014 |
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| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by vincent561(m): 7:45am On Sep 26, 2014 |
Well,it isnt always about the looks. But since u've got a predilection for good looking guys,i advise u let him go,lest u land urself into a lackadaisical relationship. No one is perfect but i believe there are still few guys close to the ''creme de la creme''. 1 Like |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by RoyalPearl(f): 7:50am On Sep 26, 2014 |
Well its okay to dare someone who has a great personality, I have dared someone who was not as attractive to me but because of his character and personality it drew me to him. But height is important to me. I am a tall girl so I prefer a tall/ taller man. At the end of the day it's up to you. If he has everything you are looking for but is not tall then if you can compromise on that then i suggest you give it a go. 1 Like |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Ucheosefoh(m): 8:00am On Sep 26, 2014 |
Arcasie:Your problem is the height that is the reason for lack of attraction, you know what is best for you and what you really want and I will not tell you to settle for less but know that you should not ignore personality for physical attraction but since you insisted on no attraction for him (which I know your confuse about the situation reason why you open a thread for it) I will advice you not to date him cus it will amount to dating him out of pity which will not work. Last note: follow your heart and let's hope your heart is not misleading you 1 Like |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Nobody: 8:20am On Sep 26, 2014 |
Did you say 5'1  Mbenukwu  Smh |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Kunleskey(m): 8:33am On Sep 26, 2014 |
I think you should follow your mind..i can't read your mind. You like his personality bt you don't like his height |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by onstelly(f): 8:42am On Sep 26, 2014 |
Ucheosefoh: I use to have that kind of mind set but when I get older I know better that want we need is not always in what we want. I am six foot tall and always dream of dating tall girls but when I get older and with lots of experience in relationship I found out that they is more to everybody than physical looks now I can date short girls not dwarfs as long as I am happy with her. I think you have to look beyond physical looks and look at his personality. I think we all lay much emphasis on physical look cus of societal pressures (allowing the society to dictate our life for us) when we start feeling the heat the society will bail us outThank you so much, you just said it all |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by valmunich(m): 8:51am On Sep 26, 2014 |
I wonder what advice you still want us to give you |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Nobody: 9:53am On Sep 26, 2014 |
Sometimes the attraction is not just there and you cannot force it. Don't just write him off since you like so many things about him,keep an open heart for most women attraction can grow and if does not grow free yourself. 1 Like |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Nobody: 10:04am On Sep 26, 2014 |
Ure just lucky some pple r stii searching for dat perfect handsome guy bt most of dem hav bad personality |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Nobody: 10:32am On Sep 26, 2014 |
rahymat: Ure just lucky some pple r stii searching for dat perfect handsome guy bt most of dem hav bad personalityI like u |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Charles4075(m): 6:23pm On Sep 26, 2014 |
This is why they say ''some girls don't know what they want'' and why falling in love with a lady is very very very bad. |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Nobody: 7:25pm On Sep 26, 2014 |
Yeah you can |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by fuckshit: 3:46am On Sep 28, 2014 |
"Attraction FÜCKING refers to a quality that causes a FÜCKING interest or FÜCKING desire in something or someone" "A FÜCKING characteristic or FÜCKING quality that provides pleasure" These are FÜCKING definitions of attraction. Lots of things FÜCKING play a part in a relationship. One FÜCKING trait that a relationship must FÜCKING have to start is an attraction. Attraction is FÜCKING important FÜCKING recognize that attraction can come from the inside & not just the FÜCKING physical attributes. It is not always FÜCKING physical. The FÜCKING great thing about attraction is whether it’s FÜCKING physical or not, it’s often FÜCKING irresistible. Physical beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Attraction is FÜCKING more than that. Attraction can be in the FÜCKING way someone takes charge or the FÜCKING way someone laughs at your. FÜCKING jokes. Attraction can FÜCKING exist in the way someone sits attentively & listens. FÜCKING making a relationship work is FÜCKING hard enough; starting out with a FÜCKING key element missing, heavily stacks the odds against you. Attraction (Chemistry) needs to be FÜCKING considered. 1 Like |
| Re: Is it ok to date a guy only for his personality or attraction is necessary?? by Nobody: 1:04pm On Sep 28, 2014 |
Since you already know he's a good guy and has a lot of great qualities yet you're still not physically attracted to him, leave him be. Sometimes someone's personality can override the physical but that's not the case here. Even if this were to happen, there has to be a bit of physical attraction from the get-go; it cannot be absent at all. You would not be yourself nor him any justice by dating him solely for his personality. In fact, it would be selfish of you to do so. Attraction is necessary, otherwise you would not give him your best/treat him properly. Everyone deserves to be with someone who finds them attractive. Don't lead him on. There's someone out there who's going to love and accept him the way he is. It's not you; no need to fight it. |
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