In today’s world, marriage is often preceded by
a period of dating. However, many people do
not understand what dating is and why it is
done. As a result, many young people have
experienced broken hearts and are now scared
of dating relationships.
A date is an appointment between a male and a
female who agree to spend a segment of time
together for the purpose of getting better
acquainted.
There are two distinct stages of dating. One is
CASUAL DATING and the other COMMITTED
DATING.
CASUAL DATING
Casual dating relationships may or may not be
accompanied by romantic interests on the part
of one or both individuals. The focus of the
casual dating is enjoying life together and
sharing a common interest. It may be two
young people who share the love of God and
attend fellowship together. Or it could be two
movie buffs that go to see movies together and
perhaps have a meal afterwards. The couple
will probably think of themselves as friends and
not consider their relationship a dating
relationship. One or both of the individuals may
also have a dating relationship with other
people. In such situations if one of them has
strong romantic feelings, they may be
emotionally hurt knowing that the other person
is dating someone else.
Casual dating normally moves in one of three
directions.
1) If no romantic interest develops and they
each have a common interest, they may develop
a strong friendship that focuses on some
common activity.
2) The relationship will end because:
One person has a strong romantic attraction
while the other does not.
There may or may not be a conflict.
Neither of the two persons have romantic
interest nor do they have strong common
interest.
3) The two individuals may develop a strong
romantic interest in each other. They find their
times together mutually enjoyable and begin to
think that they may be “falling in love” with one
another. The relationship moves from casual
dating to committed dating.
COMMITTED DATING
Committed dating is much more serious than
casual dating. It is normally perceived as an
exclusive relationship. If one of them chooses to
date someone else, the one who is betrayed will
experience great pain. They will not hesitate to
verbalize their pain, and the ensuing
conversation will lead either to the breakup of
the relationship or to a commitment to each
other.
Committed dating relationships are focused on
“getting to know’ each other. Each individual is
a complex combination of heredity and
environment. What you see on the outside is
not necessarily what you will discover on the
inside. A high level of honesty is required on the
part of both individuals in a healthy dating
relationship. There should be a willingness to
share histories with each other. Every individual
has a unique history (successes and failures
inclusive) which has brought them to where
they are today. To build a relationship upon
deception or hidden truth is to sabotage the
relationship. Simply because something is “hard
to deal with” does not mean it should be
ignored.
Areas to be covered in the process of getting to
know each other in a committed relationship
are:
Spirituality
Sexual history
Financial history
Family dynamics
Educational and vocational goals.
A healthy dating relationship will be a balanced
relationship. Balancing the spiritual, intellectual,
emotional, social and physical aspects of life is
one of the characteristicsof a healthy
relationship.
Culled from “Things I Wish I’d Known Before We
Got Married” by Gary Chapman
Many committed dating relationships go on to
marriage. However, in some committed dating
relationship, one or both individuals may
eventually discover that "what you see on the
outside is not what is on the inside". In such
situations, where the couple is unable to resolve
the issues involved, the relationship will come to
a painful end.
Whether you are in a dating relationship or not,
I encourage you to read books like Gary
Chapman's "Things I Wish I'd Known Before
Getting Married" and Bimbo Odukoya's "How To
Choose A Life Partner.

U just made a note on it

suckerpunch: U just made a note on it

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suckerpunch: U just made a note on it

hahaha..so??

ojaydedon: hahaha..so??

No no we cool

suckerpunch:

No no we cool

i knw... Just sayin