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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / He Has Changed.. Almost Completely (17916 Views)
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Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by freecocoa(f): 4:44pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
bukatyne:You couldn't have said it better. |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by UjSizzle(f): 4:44pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
freecocoa:My thoughts exactly. Very deceptive.
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Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by Nobody: 4:47pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
Lepetitechic: I will tell you that any day I advertise myself as a marriage counselor. |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by mutter(f): 4:48pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
When you go to your neighbors house to steal goods, you don`t complain about the quality of the fruits. When you buy a tree at a very expensive price and plant it in your garden, you go wild if the fruits turn out rotten. 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by Nobody: 4:49pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
4 Likes |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by bukatyne(f): 4:56pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
freecocoa: Thanks |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by bukatyne(f): 4:57pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by crackhaus: 5:00pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
TV01:That's the thing about men who act too nice - not like being nice is a bad thing, but a time comes when one just has to look a woman in the face and tell her exactly what you don't like about her personality/character. All that sentiment on how he has always known about my character and personality..., was just him playing nice and probably avoiding anything that may upset her - I'm pretty sure he was the kind of man she would refer to as real man, the kind who will be a yes man and never be blunt or criticize her (constructively and otherwise). It can only last for so long. What you want to put together is long overdue.. 2 Likes |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by Nobody: 5:05pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by bukatyne(f): 5:08pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
Nonso23: What is 'Telemundo marriage?' what is 'blissful marriage' Like I said, as you like it. |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by freecocoa(f): 5:11pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
bukatyne:You welcome. |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by Odunharry(m): 5:11pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
crackhaus:una wan kill me with laff na wetin mak me call una clown jaree.. She will definitely show up and complete the story..I believe there are somethings she isnt telling |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by Nobody: 5:16pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by Nobody: 5:16pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
byvan:Not at all 1 Like |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by 100Cents: 5:22pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
Ohwhy: There are ladies who are in the habit of hurting men whom they date. They insult the men, spite them, cheat on them to get back at them. One thing I always tell ladies is this. He might be after your beauty and be nice to you. But after the wedding, he will tell you that he is the head and cannot be controlled by you. Op, for you to mention that he knew your character before marrying you shows that your character is repulsive to the sane mind but since he has been accommodating it while you guys were dating, you expect him to continue accommodating it after marriage. Why not work on yourself ? 4 Likes |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by 100Cents: 5:22pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
obicentlis: Good advice. 1 Like |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by dBard: 5:23pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
Reading the comments here, I'll reiterate what I've bin saying... Only married peeps should comment/advice on marital threads like this bf peeps like by van n co cause unnecessary divorces in marriages. @o.p...looked up ur oda thread,so may have an idea of the 'characters' ur talking about. That aside, there's almost no one that gets into marriage without expecting some sort of miraculous transformation from their spouse, no matter how illogical it may be. Ur married now, make a conscious effort to drop the habits/characters..but make him understand ur still the same u. more importantly, put ur foot down on his careless use of d word divorce. Some seeds are best not thrown on fertile ground lest they take root. He Needs To Stop That. As a guy tho, I can understand the change he's going through,especially with the added blessing of the baby, tho he is handling it very wrongly. The first year of marriage mite be as some has said here, but It Can also on d flip, be one of the best times u both can have. It's simply a matter of choice. 2 Likes |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by Nobody: 5:24pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by Nobody: 5:26pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
100Cents: So you're saying her husband is insane? Well if your whole write up is true, then you're probably right. 2 Likes |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by 100Cents: 5:28pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
Aprime: Gbam... |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by bukatyne(f): 5:32pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
Nonso23: Ok then |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by Nobody: 5:37pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
1 Like |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by An0nimus: 5:47pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
bukatyne:Pretty deceptive but these things happen. Freecocoa your point is noted. TV01 don't forget to post what you have planned on the Boys night out thread 1 Like |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by bukatyne(f): 5:49pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
An0nimus: And terrible people support that |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by An0nimus: 5:50pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
bukatyne: People like? |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by Nobody: 5:56pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
TV01:You misunderstand me, you just spoke my mind in your first paragraph. My point is, he was well aware of her ways but chose to not speak up against them and is only doing so now that he's bought her off. A move which might backfire, which is why I said he was not wise to do so. I agree with the "grow up and shape up" line every bit, by the way, that sounded exactly like my wonderful father 1 Like |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by Nobody: 6:07pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
freecocoa:You don't have to agree, but you certainly might want to explore their minds for even though experience doesn't always confer wisdom it does knowledge. Perhaps, they're sharing from the bounty of knowledge they possess due to experience which you aren't privy to. |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by bukatyne(f): 6:15pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
An0nimus: |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by cococandy(f): 6:17pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
If she had a nasty character and he went ahead to date her for six years and marry her,then he's 100percent to blame. Old people say one doesn't learn to be left handed in old age. He must be very immature to think she will change in her old age. For him to accommodate whatever it is they think her problem is for 6 good years,he gave her the unspoken reassurance that he was fine with it. Now he's turning his back on the deal? That's deception. If he didn't know I wouldn't blame him. But he knew. Come on So in my opinion he's the one who changed. Imagine dating an armed robber or woman beater or drug dealer for 6 years and as a woman you saw all the manifestation of his bad character in those six years then after 2 months of marriage you want to turn him into pastor adeboye? That's unrealistic and childish. He made his bed. He better lie on it. @OP whatever it is you do that is uncool,try help yourself adjust. Not just for this man but for your relationship with other people elsewhere. You never know what opportunity you could miss because of somethings you do that put people off. Help yourself 6 Likes |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by Nobody: 6:17pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
TV01:Hitting the wall hard just cracked me right up. However, it's unlikely that she'd be hitting the wall had he not wifed her. You should see your bredrin back here swallow the most inane rubbish all in the name of romance and being modern, it's sickening I tell ya. When you consider somebody like Cococandy who has massive solipsism, cognitive dissonance and comprehension deficiency having a suitor queue longer than the Suez Canal and getting married before 25, you begin to understand what I mean. 3 Likes |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by Nobody: 6:21pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
crackhaus:Which is my grouse with the dude. He could have just called her out since year one or moved on if she didn't change. If this tactic works for him, he'd be lucky and among the few who'd have benefited from it. Perhaps, he'd studied his subject very well or the fact of the almost decade-long courtship would make her maleable. |
Re: He Has Changed.. Almost Completely by Nobody: 6:36pm On Jan 12, 2015 |
You all have spoken well. But I wanna say that if my personality was as bad as some people here termed it, I won't have bothered posting this topic. I was frm a poor background when he met me, I never covered this up like most grls would. Infact I showed him where I live the first day we saw each other. He called me humble. Even with my kind of background, I was never materialistic. He loved this about me. (He had the guts to refer to me as poor after we tied the knots) My kind of person, am a shy person who can hardly look at a person's face for more than 10 seconds. Am not confrontational ( now he wishes I was as aggressive as his friend's wife) I get scared easily I find it hard to ask questions most times . I don't like outrageous kinda dressing, I like to keep it simple, he loved this about me (now he calls me a small girl). Am not rude, am not insultive as I was raised well by my parents. I knew him well and he knows me well. The years of courtship was never filled with pretense because we spent a lot of time together. There was no room for one to pretend. 1 Like |
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